Second Rate Chances (5 page)

SECOND RATE CHANCES

CHAPTER 6

Sam called out to Lil, his voice hoarse as he strained to get her to hear him. It was no use. Once Lil had her mind set to something there was no getting her to see reason.

How had life come to this? A world where they weren't together? It didn't seem possible. They were so in love. Since that first day in college when they had both arrived at the dorms with their parents, they were inseparable. They had been through the deaths of family members; both of her parents and his mom. She was family in every sense of the word.

Where his mind was at the present moment, he was planning to ask her to marry him. He didn’t have an exact date set on when he wanted to pop the big question, only that he knew he couldn’t go through life without Lil beside him. Sam had to wonder what could have happened for them to lose that. To not speak or even be in the same room together in the past three years

             
             
Dashing into the room, his dad asked, “What happened, son?” His brother was right behind him, his gaze penetrating Sam.

             
             
Sam rubbed his eyes. It would have helped if the action could erase the last fifteen minutes. Maybe then he and Lil could start over.

“I don't know, Dad. Lil’s upset because I asked what happened between us. I yelled, she yelled.” He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “She ran out of here saying she can’t help me.”

             
             
Sam leaned back against the flat pillows the hospital had provided. He couldn't get comfortable. It seemed that nowhere was going to be comfortable in this new life.

             
             
“Dad,” Sam began. “What happened with Lil and me? Did I cheat on her?”

             
             
“No, you didn't cheat.” While Paul was eager to answer his question, Sam could hear the reservation in his voice.

             
             
“I had to have done something pretty bad. Just tell me. I need to know. I have to make things right.”

             
             
“Sam,” Paul took a deep breath. “It's not my place. I'm sorry. It really needs to be something you and Lil discuss.”

             
             
“But she won't even look at me!” Sam shouted. “How can I get her to talk to me if she can't even be in the same room with me?”

             
             
Sam watched his father’s reaction to his outburst. The man looked like he was battling something. The tight lines around his mouth, his eyes drawn in together. Something was on his mind, something he was afraid to tell Sam.

“Listen, the doctor was just telling us he's going to send you home in a couple of days. He wants to monitor you a little more. Keep a close watch on you now that Lil has been by. He thinks maybe seeing her will prompt the memories to return.”

             
             
“And if they don't?” Sam looked to his father for guidance. It was apparent that from the look in his eyes that he had none to give.

             
             
“We'll figure that out.”

             
             
“I just want to go home. Go back to before I hit my head.”

             
Joshua snorted. It was the first sound he had made since entering the room. “What?” Sam asked. “What was that for?”

             
             
“Nothing.” Joshua said as he turned his back on his brother. More pieces of the puzzle kept falling to the floor. First, his dad and the information he was keeping from him, and now his brother who had this less than cavalier attitude toward him.

             
             
“A couple of days and we'll take you home,” Paul said to his son. “I promise you. We'll set your room back up just like it used to be.”

             
             
“You don't understand, Dad. I don't want to go to your home. I want to go to my home.”

             
             
“Well, that ought to make Chloe happy. You've got that big fancy condo downtown.”

             
             
“Downtown? Since when did they put in condos downtown? Wouldn't the historical society have a fit about that?”

             
             
“Dad,” Joshua cut in. “He doesn't know. He doesn't know that he's turned his back on The Village. That he's a preppy do good'er living the high life.” Joshua laughed while shaking his head. The reaction from his brother only fueled the anger welling up inside Sam.

             
             
“You're right! I don't know! I don't know anything. Why are you being such an asshole? What have I done to you?” Sam demanded.

             
             
“Nothing. That's what you've done to me. Nothing. It's all you've done to any of us.”

             
             
“Stop it, both of you!” Paul shouted. “Josh, lay off your brother. He has enough going on that he doesn’t need you telling him how he’s changed.” Sam watched as his brother stormed out of the room.

             
             
Sam looked at his dad, his voice dropping to that of a whisper. “What have I become? My girlfriend can't look at me. My own brother can't be in the same room with me. Dad, have I hurt everybody?”

             
             
After several beats of silence Paul finally said, “You've changed Sam. Let's just leave it at that.”

             
             
Sam could tell he wasn't going to get anything else from his dad so he decided to drop the subject, for now. “So the doctor says in a couple of days I can leave. Where am I going to go? Does Lil even still own the cottage?”

             
             
Paul took a seat on the edge of the twin hospital bed. “The last I heard, yeah, she still owns it. As for where you're going to go, you have options. You can go to your condo or you can come home with me. You'll always have a home there.”

             
             
Sam closed his eyes and prayed for sleep to take him. He wanted to wake up from this horrible nightmare. Preferably the part where he lived in a high-rise downtown and he was engaged to his boss' daughter.

~~~~

Lil could barely see through the tears in her eyes as she drove away from the hospital. She tried to regain some sort of composure because there was no way she could go to work with a tear-stained face. Pulling off to the side of the road, just before the welcome sign to The Village greeted her, she took a few moments to dry her eyes and calm down.

             
             
Seeing Sam had done a real number on her. He truly believed that they were together. That nothing had ever happened to tear them apart. It was all too much. She felt like the air was being sucked out of the hospital room. She was losing focus. Her breathing became labored. She had to leave. It was a chicken move, but had she not acted fast, she would have ended up alongside him in a bed of her own. Panic attacks were something she had learned to work through. There was no working through a panic attack of that magnitude.

             
             
Lil picked up her cell phone and dialed the office. She had to catch Ellie before she left for lunch. When the familiar sound of her best friend’s voice filtered through the channels, Lil breathed a sigh of relief.

             
             
“Hey.” Lil was afraid to say too much more knowing that her voice still sounded gravelly.

             
             
“Hey you. So...how did it go? Tell me he's bald? Oh!” Lil could picture Ellie clapping her hands and stomping her feet from excitement. “He's bald isn't he? I knew it! The boys never get their daddy's hair and his daddy,” Ellie moaned into the phone, “is one hot piece of–”

             
             
Lil cut her off before she ventured into how hot Paul Travers was. “Ellie, I need you to cancel my appointments for today.”

             
             
“What happened? Lil Harper, you tell me right now what's going on.”

             
             
“I can't. Not yet anyway. Listen, just call and reschedule my appointments. I have something I need to take care of. I won't be in for the rest of the day. I'm sorry. I gotta go. Just do this for me and I'll talk to you soon.”

             
Lil ended the call before Ellie could say another word. She loved her best friend dearly, but she knew Ellie well enough to know that she would have beat the information out of her with a steel bat, then taken her to the bar at noon to get her wasted. The offer sounded tempting, but Lil had someone else she needed to talk to first. Someone who she had confided everything in. Someone she hadn't had to speak to in over a year.

Lil dialed the number she still had programmed on her speed dial and waited. When the receptionist answered the call, Lil said the familiar words she thought she'd never have to say again.

“This is Lil Harper. Please tell Dr. Kingston that I'm on my way. We need to have an emergency session.”

~~~~

Lil sat in the office of Dr. Evelyn Kingston, her therapist who helped her through the break up with Sam. It wasn’t just the break up that left Lil needing guidance; it was what had led up to the separation. Dr. Kingston had helped Lil see that she wasn’t responsible for what happened. After blaming herself for a year, Lil finally understood that it wasn’t entirely her fault. Sam held just as much responsibility as she did.

             
             
Nothing had changed in Dr. Kingston’s office. The walls were still a chocolate brown. The pictures that hung were of her famed Weimaraner. Oddly, the worn leather of the couch felt comforting to Lil. She had thought after her last session when she had deemed herself no longer in need of Dr. Kingston's help that she'd never see this place again.

             
             
The door to Dr. Kingston's private office opened. Lil had never liked looking at the people who came and went. Therapy was a private matter and she tried to respect every person.

             
             
When she heard the front door softly close, Lil looked up. Dr. Kingston stood with a smirk on her face and her arms crossed over her chest.

             
             
“Well, well, well. Let me guess. You saw him?” Dr. Kingston was never anything but matter-of-fact. “Come on in, Lil.

             
             
“You look good,” Dr. Kingston said as Lil passed through the office doors. “My receptionist is still intact. Either you've been doing your breathing or you're on the edge of the cliff.”

             
             
Lil smiled. “Both.” Dr. Kingston closed the door to her office and gestured for Lil to have a seat. The long chaise lounge was a nicer addition than some stuffy old couch that was neither comfortable nor comforting.

             
             
Dr. Kingston took her usual perch on her Queen Anne chair. She was a stunning woman for someone who was well into her sixties. Her short, pixie cut gray hair gave her the appearance that she was in her early fifties instead. Her immaculate complexion glowed under the soft lighting that she always used in her office. She was shapely in that she reminded Lil of her grandmother and how she liked to curl into her side. She tried picturing that with Dr. Kingston.

             
             
“So let me guess,” Dr. Kingston began. “This session is in order because Sam's lost his memory?”

             
             
Lil stared at the doctor. “How did you know?”

             
             
“I shouldn't tell you this, but the hospital called. They wanted me to take him on as a patient.” Lil's face clouded with confusion. “With amnesia patients,” Dr. Kingston explained, “as part of their therapy they are required to see someone. Naturally because there isn’t an influx of therapists in the area, I was one of the ones they called. Of course, I told them it would be a conflict of interest. So,” she smiled at Lil, “I've been patiently waiting for your call.”

             
             
Lil sat quietly on the lounge. She should have considered this possibility. Of course Sam would need to see someone.

             
             
“What happened?”