Second Chance Ranch (22 page)

He sat silent a moment. “The recipient. That’s all she is. Just doesn’t seem right.”

Before she could form the words to remind him Carli was more than just a nameless recipient, he hugged her close and blew a sharp breath. “I’ve come to terms with it. Everything you said was true. Neither of us could have raised a child when we were barely adults ourselves.” He released her and instead reached for her hand. For the first time since the doctor left them alone, Zac met her gaze. “We’re adults now. And I don’t want to make the same mistake twice. We can still have children. We can do it right this time.”

The depth of need so apparent in his dark eyes, her heart jumped and then settled back into an erratic rhythm. “Zac, we can talk about this after the procedure is over. Right now, we need to pray you through the next couple of hours.”

“I’ve prayed for the last few days — and not only about this transplant. God’s giving us a second chance.” Interlocking their fingers, he pulled her toward him. She reached down and steadied herself against his thigh, his firm muscles contoured beneath the hospital gown. “I can’t believe it took me so long to tell you I love you. I want to say it all the time.”

His lips pressed against hers and all the shame of her yesterdays melted away into the hope of today. There was hope…hope for all of them. She ran her fingers through his thick hair, her palm brushing against the smooth skin of his jaw. Their kiss deepened and all Jen wanted was for the day to be over and them on their way back home.

He trailed kisses across her cheek until he found a sensitive spot beneath her ear. The tingle that raced down her spine confused her as much as it comforted. Zac. Her Zac. Why was life so difficult to sort out when he was around? “Let’s work on things one at a time, okay? First, we get through today and then we’ll see what tomorrow brings.”

People spoke just outside the door. The time had come. She started to break away when Zac tugged her back and captured her in another kiss. She melted. She stepped back just as the attendant opened the door.

“Mr. Davidson?” A slender, good-natured fellow with closely cropped blond hair stepped into the room. “Ready to go?”

Jen moved out of the way as Zac brought his feet up on the gurney, carefully tucking his hospital gown around him. The other man eased the covers over him and the blond locked the wheels in place. He smiled encouragement to Jennifer.

“He’ll be back before you know it.”

Jen grabbed Zac’s hand as the bed began to move. She paced alongside, careful not to trip up the attendants. When they got to the double doors leading into surgery, she pulled up close and gave a Zac a quick kiss.

“I’ll be here when you got out.”

“I’m counting on it.”

The attendants pushed through the doors, leaving Jen standing and watching until the doors closed. She took a moment to gather her wits. Things were moving too fast. She never juggled priorities, but now she had so many emotions in the air, she didn’t know what to grab first. She needed a couple of hours to grapple with her thoughts and bring order back into her toppled life.

Walking back to the cubicle, she grabbed her purse and headed toward the lounge area. Food. And coffee. Lots of coffee. She pushed the door open leading out of the prep area and turned the corner toward the vending machines. Footsteps clipped down the hallway behind her.

“Jennifer.”

Jen turned. Grace and Martin Davidson walked toward her and behind them, her father.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Grace ran her hand down Jen’s arm as her gaze locked with Jen’s. “Are you okay? Where’s Zac?”

Jen looked from Grace to Martin, and then glanced at her father. The grim set to his lips said it all. Ever since her mother had died, Jen knew he’d expected her to do the right thing and not distract him with poor behavior. All her careful planning…all her secrecy over her pregnancy…all the pain she’d bottled up inside herself just so he wouldn’t be disappointed in her, now drained from her soul with the force of a tsunami.

“You weren’t supposed to find out.”

“Find out what?” Grace kept her serious gray eyes trained on Jen, completely crumbling Jen’s last defenses. “Is Zac sick? Is that why he came to you? Because you’re a nurse?”

Jen shook her head, moisture building in her eyes. She’d shouldn’t be having this conversation with the Davidsons. Or her father. She wasn’t prepared, and when she wasn’t prepared for things, her words came out all wrong.
Please Lord, put the words in my mouth.

“Your father got a call from a doctor here at the hospital saying Zac had been admitted and that you were with him.” Martin said over Grace’s shoulder. “He didn’t say why.”

Dad has friends in all the right places.
She should have known something like this wouldn’t be kept a secret for long.

“You’re frightening me, Jennifer. Say something.” Grace dug her fingers into Jen’s forearm. “It’s serious, isn’t it? Some disease, right?” Her voice quaked as she drew a breath. “Why are you and Zac at the hospital in Denver? Why--”

“Zac is donating his bone marrow to a child who is suffering with a form of leukemia.” The words blurted out of her. There was so much to say, she didn’t know where to begin. “His DNA matched.”

“That’s why he was in the clinic in Hawk Ridge, right?” her father said quietly. “You’d been tested earlier.”

“I wasn’t a match.” The tears pooled and slid down her cheek. “I wanted to be. I didn’t want there to be any trouble over this.”

Grace placed her hand over her heart as if the pressure might calm her. “Trouble? Why would you think there’d be trouble over trying to help someone?” She glanced at Jen’s dad. “Who in Hawk Ridge needs a transplant, James?

He gave a slight shrug. “No one in town.”

Martin frowned. “Then, who needs bone marrow? And why Zac’s?”

There was no way around it. The secret she’d been hiding for so many years couldn’t be kept any longer. “Our daughter.”

Grace stepped back. Martin turned to grasp the arm of a chair and sat down his free hand covering his chest.

Her father simply closed his eyes and hung his head.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

She sounded so far away.

Zac focused on Jen’s voice. He tried to tilt his head to the side, but it didn’t make her words any clearer. Other sounds swam around him, or maybe they were voices, too. He didn’t know. He didn’t care.

He just wanted to find Jen.

His eyelids felt as if they’d been glued shut with rubber cement. A watery haze blurred his vision. He blinked until he recognized the swatch of denim fabric that dipped in and out of his vision. “Jen.”

“I’m right here.” Her fingers squeezed his. “Just like I said I would be.”

Silky blonde strands tickled his neck. Her nose brushed across his cheek as her breath warmed his cheek. The faint scent of her shampoo greeted him like a long lost friend. His best friend.

“Marry me.” His raw throat rebelled against his voice. A coughing spasm gripped his chest as he tried to moisten his throat. Fisting his hand, he tried to lay still against the hacks.

“Take a sip.” She slipped a hand beneath his head and supported him as she pressed a cup of water to his lips. “They had an issue come up and had to put you under. Nothing serious, but your throat will be a bit sore for a while.” She let just enough of the liquid trickle into his mouth. The spasms stopped and his eyes opened wider, the haze gone.

Jen stood over him, her blue eyes bright in contrast to the darker circles beneath her lashes. Strands of her hair draped down to his cheek, swiping away the last of his fog. She was right, there was nothing to this donating bone marrow. He couldn’t remember falling asleep. How long had be been out? He shifted to sit up.

“No, no, no, don’t move.” Her hand cupped his shoulder and held him still. “You’ll get nauseated.”

“Jen.” He tested his vocal cords as he cleared his throat. “I feel fine.”

“Good, because we have company.”

Pain shot through his neck and head as he tried to move his head. His mother appeared beside Jennifer.

“Zac. Why didn’t you tell us?” She controlled her voice when he winced at the tone. “We figured something was up, but nothing like this. We were worried sick that you’d contracted some disease.”

His father cleared his throat on the other side of the bed, but Zac didn’t dare move to look at him. “I can explain.”

“I’m sure you can. Just like always.” She tucked the blanket beneath him, her nervous energy needing an outlet. “At least you had Jennifer watching out for you. Like she always has.”

Seemed like a good time to anchor himself in Jen’s tired smile. The soft brush of her fingertips along the back of his neck dissipated his building tension. “It’s just some tests.”

She tapped his neck and nodded toward his mother. “They know.”

“They know?” he echoed, the words settled on his mind, his fogged brain hindering immediate comprehension.

“About the transplant.”

The transplant. Alarms went off in his head as he held his breath. He stared into Jen’s smiling blue eyes and regrouping his thoughts. “Did it go okay?”

She nodded as blonde wisps of hair brushed her cheek. “Marrow all packed up and waiting for a flight to New York.”

Tension drained from his shoulders. He wanted to kiss her. Tears burned behind his eyes as he blinked at the moisture.

“Jennifer was a tough one to crack, but having her cornered for a few hours worked to our advantage.” Grace continued to pluck at his blanket. “A child. She had a child and gave it away. I can’t imagine the pain.”

“Grace, Martin, this was a long time ago—”

She waved away excuses. “You’re a strong girl, but not that strong. No one should go through something like that alone.”

“I wasn’t alone, and it was a long time ago.” Though Jen spoke her words softly, Zac knew it cost her more than she’d ever let on. She withdrew her comforting touch and backed away from the bed. She stopped at the door, a tight smile etched on her face. “Since Zac’s awake, I need to step out for a moment. I’ll be back soon.”

Zac wanted to hold her beside him, keep her near and offer her all the support he hadn’t before. He wanted to tell her he loved her and wanted her forever, but she opened the hospital room door and disappeared before he could even grab for air.

“Are you feeling okay, Zac?” His mother squeezed his hand, her voice as gentle as it had been years ago when he’d fallen off his horse and she wanted to distract him while she checked for broken bones. Back then, he didn’t recognize the tactic; now he knew she reserved that tone to keep all her fiercest worries at bay.

He needed to keep their conversation at a surface level until he understood what his parents knew. And his brain wasn’t so foggy. “The doctor told me there was nothing to this surgery and he was right. Nothing but a headache and a catch in my back.” He tried to straighten up until pain shot up his side. He stopped in mid-stretch.

“Don’t move. Jennifer told us what to watch for,” his dad’s quiet voice commanded. Martin stepped up to the rail along the other side of his bed. He reached out and gripped Zac’s forearm. “We would have supported your decision no matter what, you know. We love Jen as family. I wish you would have told us.”

What was he supposed to say? She hadn’t told him until a couple of weeks ago. “We were young. It was the course we were most comfortable with.” As the words left his lips, Zac realized they were true. They had been kids back then. He’d made party-ing a graduate level challenge. For all the hurt and confusion he’d wallowed in over the past days, his bottom line reflected exactly what Jen had endured.

By herself. All alone.

“I know you and Jen gave this a lot of thought before taking such drastic action.’ Grace drew a breath, the ragged edge of her emotions caught on her last word. “Both of you have good heads on your shoulders. I just hope it wasn’t a decision you’ll look back on and regret.”

Zac looked from his mom to his dad. Strong, loving, Christian parents who never backed down from any challenge their three boys had thrown their way. They’d been there to support Nick when his wife died; they kept Gabe from working himself to death before Melanie came along. They took Jennifer and Kade in when their mother died and their father was too steeped in his own grief to realize his kids needed comfort and hugs. Grace and Martin Davidson understood the meaning of love. A gift Zac had always taken for granted.

Everything surrounding this operation forced him to look his life smack in the eye — and he didn’t like what he saw.

“Mom, Dad, forgive me.” He glanced at both of them, the lines of love and worry a familiar sight. “There are a lot of things I’ve done that I’m not proud of, but loving Jennifer O’Reilly isn’t one of them. Both of us have decisions to make over the next few weeks and I promise I’ll share them with you. Jen and I have some things to discuss.”

His dad patted his arm and winked. “So we heard.”

* * *

The muted colors of the wallpaper calmed her mind as Jen walked along the corridor that led from patient rooms to the waiting area. She’d been taken off guard when they’d found her before Zac’s surgery, but she was never surprised. Grace and Martin Davidson had an uncanny way of knowing
everything
. She shouldn’t have been any more surprised to see her dad with them. After all, this was a hospital — her dad’s lifeblood.