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Before I knew, it we had finished two bottles
of wine.

While we were laughing about them being in
jail, I said,

“I have to admit that I was
surprised when Ari called
me
to come and get y’all out of jail. I just figured
that my phone was the only one she was able to get through
to.”

“Well, you know the only reason why she
called you was so you could see me dressed like a damn whore,”
Heather said as she laughed.

She must have thought about what she had just
said because her head snapped up to look at me.

Now, why would Ari do that unless she
thought Heather had feelings for me? I’m done playing games. It’s
time to find out.

Heather was leaning up against the counter
while as I sitting on one of her bar stools. I got up and walked
toward her. Pulling her into my arms, I didn’t even give her time
to think before I backed her up against the wall.

As I started to kiss her she ran her hands
through my hair. The small moan that escaped her lips made me want
to rip off her damn clothes. When I lifted her up, she wrapped her
legs around my waist. The kiss was quickly turning more passionate
by the second.

Son of a bitch. I’ve wanted
to kiss this girl for so long now.
She
tasted sweeter than anything I could’ve ever imagined.

She pulled back slightly, trying to caught
her breath.

“Josh…I’ve… I’ve never been with anyone
before, and...” Her voice trailed off as she looked down at my
lips.

My knees just about buckled
out from underneath me. I had to put one hand on the wall to hold
myself up.
Holy shit. Heather’s a
virgin.

Closing her eyes, she put her head back
against the wall. Leaning down, I started to kiss her neck.

Two minutes ago, I’d been ready to ask the
way to her bedroom. There was no way in hell that I was going to
that now. Now, all I wanted to do was make her feel cherished.

“Princess, look at me.”

As she lifted her head up, her blue eyes
captured mine, and I saw was sadness. My heart broke in two.

“I’d never do anything that you weren’t ready
to do, Heather. Ever.”

“Josh…I really want…” She paused, stopping
mid-sentence.

“You really want what?”

The look in her eyes suddenly turned to pure
panic. She started to shake her head.

“I need you to put me down!” she practically
shouted.

“What?” I asked, confused.

“Put me down, Josh. Now!”

What the hell is happening?

I put her down, and the moment her feet hit
the floor, she pushed me away.

“Heather, I don’t understand. What’s going
on? What did I do?”

Turning away from me, she walked into the
living room and stopped at the front window, staring outside.

“I really think you need to leave now. This
was a bad idea. I was stupid to think that we could ever just be
friends. You’ll always want more than this.”

Motherfucker.
My head was spinning.

“Um… I’m sorry, princess, but it sure seemed
like you also wanted more a few seconds ago. What changed?”

When she turned around, I almost lost my
breath. She was crying.

“Don’t ever call me princess again. I don’t
want anything more than friendship with you. I’ll never want
anything more than that. I had a moment of weakness. It must have
been because of the wine or something. I don’t want you, Josh, not
in that way. I’m sorry if I led you on. I think it would be best if
we just stopped right now.”

I didn’t know what to say. I
had seen the look in her eyes. I knew she had wanted me as much as
I’d wanted her.
Why is she pushing me
away?

“Heather…if I walk out this door right now,
I’ll keep in mind everything that you just said to me. I promise
you that I’ll never approach you again with anything more than
friendship. I just need you to make sure that this is what you
really want. I have feelings for you. Honestly, I feel things for
you that I’ve never in my life felt for any other girl, and that
scares the shit out of me. I don’t want to walk away from you, but
if you tell me that you don’t have any feelings for me, then I’ll
leave. I won’t ever bring it up again.”

I watched her as she just stared at me with
tears where rolling down her face. I walked up to her and reached
out to wipe them away. When she took a step back, I almost dropped
to my knees.

She quickly wiped her tears from her eyes.
Looking right into my eyes, she said,

“I don’t have feelings for you other than
friendship. I’m sorry.”

My whole world shattered
into a million pieces.
How could I be so
happy one minute and then feel so incredibly sad the
next?

I had never in my life cried, but at that
moment, I felt like I was about to lose it. Quickly backing away
from her, I turned to grab my keys off the counter.

“I’m sorry, Heather. I guess I’ll see you on
Wednesday at Garrett and Emma’s party.”

I walked to the door, and every ounce of me
was praying that she would stop me. I gave up all hope by the time
I got to my truck. Once outside, I sat there for a minute, watching
her door.

Then, I started my truck and drove away from
the one thing that I thought would finally make me feel happy and
complete in this world.

CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR

HEATHER

The moment the front door
closed, I fell to the ground and cried.
What did I just do?
I had never in my
life felt the way I did when Josh was kissing me. I’d wanted
nothing more than to tell him that I needed him, heart and
soul.

He must have waited to see if I’d come after
him. After a few minutes, I heard him start up his truck before he
drove off.

He left.

He just walked away from me and never looked
back.

Oh. My. God. Feeling sick to my stomach, I
jumped up and ran to the bathroom. Just when I didn’t think I could
throw up any more, another round of nausea hit me. Sitting down on
the bathroom floor, I leaned back against the wall. I touched my
fingers up to my lips as I closed my eyes.

Princess, look at
me
.
I’d never do
anything that you weren’t ready to do, Heather. Ever.

Why did he call me princess?

I thought back to my sixteenth birthday.

***

“Daddy, why can’t I see where we’re
going?”

“Princess, you really need to have more
patience. You’ll get to see it soon enough.”

Daddy was taking me to get my birthday
present, but he wouldn’t let me see what it was.

“Okay, we’re here. Hold on. Let me go around
and open your door.”

The next thing I knew, Daddy was holding my
hand, leading me somewhere. I could hear people talking, but then
it got really quiet. I felt warm breath up against my ear.

“Happy birthday, darling,” my mother
whispered in my ear.

My heart started to
pound.
Mom was here?

“Okay, princess, are you ready for your
surprise?”

“Yes, Daddy! I’ve been ready for like the
last hour!”

I heard my mom and dad laugh. Someone took
off the blind fold, and then I opened my eyes. We were in the
parking lot of my favorite restaurant, The Oasis. I saw Ellie and
Ari standing there with huge smiles on their faces. My whole family
and a few close friends were all here.

“Oh my gosh, is everyone here for my
birthday?” I said, looking at my mom and then my dad.

“Princess, take a good look around.”

I turned toward Ellie and Ari, and then I
noticed Ari was leaning up against a white Nissan Pathfinder with a
huge bow on it.

I spun around and looked at my parents. “You
didn’t?”

My dad laughed and then smiled at me. “We
did.”

“Daddy, I don’t even have my driver’s license
yet. I can’t drive it. I’m too afraid to drive it! Oh my gosh,
who’s going to drive it home? Do we have to leave it here?”

Putting his hand on my shoulders, he looked
into my eyes. I wasn’t even sure why I was panicking.

“Princess, look at me. I’d never make you do
anything you weren’t ready to do. You can drive the car, baby girl,
when you’re ready.”

***

Putting my head down on my knees, I just
cried. The moment when Josh had said almost those exact words to
me, memories of my father had instantly flooded into my mind.

I couldn’t believe that Josh had also called
me princess. He hadn’t known that my dad had called me that. At
first, I had liked it, but then something had happened. When he’d
kissed me, I had fallen even more in love with him.

I couldn’t let him get close
to me.
What if something happened to him,
making him leave me like my parents did?
I
just couldn’t let that happen to me again. I wouldn’t let that
happen to me again.

I thought about what Josh had said right
before he’d left.

“I have feelings for you. Honestly, I feel
things for you I’ve never in my life felt for any other girl, and
that scares the shit out of me. I don’t want to walk away from you,
but if you tell me that you don’t have feelings for me, then I’ll
leave. I won’t ever bring it up again.”

Oh. My.God.
I’d let him walk away from me. I’d just let him
walk right out of my life. The hurt that I had seen in his eyes
would haunt me for the rest of my life.

Just then, my cell phone rang.

I slowly got up and made my way into the
living room. By the time I got my purse and pulled the phone out,
it had stopped ringing. I had secretly hoped that it was Josh, but
instead, I saw that I had missed a call from Ellie.

My voice mail notification went off. After I
hit the button to retrieve the message, I turned on the speaker
phone.

“Holy hell, Heather! What happened with you
and Josh? He just called Gunner, and he was so upset that Gunner
could hardly understand what he was saying. Josh said something
about going to get drunk. Before he hung up, he said he’d see us
Wednesday. Please call me back on the land line at Emma and
Garrett’s.”

I hit delete and then tossed
my phone on the sofa. I had a sick feeling in my stomach.
What if he went out, got drunk, and slept with
some girl?
I’d over-heard Josh telling Jeff
that he hadn’t had sex in months. I knew he was doing it for me. I
threw myself back into the sofa.

Shit! I just made the
biggest mistake of my life.
I let out the
loudest scream I could.
What is wrong with
me? What did that stupid therapist say? It was something about me
needing to let go of the past to move on with my future.

Is Josh my future?
I could certainly see him in my future. As I
closed my eyes, I imagined what it would be like to make love to
him.
Would he be sweet and gentle or full
of passion and lust?

I had so wanted to take off his shirt
earlier, just to get a good look at his chest. I’d seen him without
a shirt plenty of times. He had tattoos going up and down his arms,
but the tribal tattoo that he had on his side was my favorite.
Ugh!

Sitting up, I grabbed my phone. After I
pulled up his number, I just sat there, staring at it for a few
minutes. Then, I finally hit dial.

The phone rang and
rang.
Damn it Josh, answer the
phone.

I hung up when I got his voice mail.

I waited ten more minutes, and then I called
him again. This time, when I got his voice mail, I decided to leave
a message.

“Hey, Josh…um, it’s me, Heather. Listen, I
shouldn’t have let you leave like that. I’m sorry for what I said.
Is there any way that you could maybe call me back or come back
over so we can talk? I’ll be home all night.”

After I watched two movies, I hit the gym. I
came back home, and there was still no word from Josh. I decided to
call him one more time. If he didn’t answer, then I’d know that he
didn’t want to talk to me.

The ringing stopped, and
then all I heard was lots of voices and music. It sounded like a
bar.
Oh shit.

“Josh? Hey, it’s Heather. Can you hear
me?”

“Um...this isn’t Josh. It’s Marie. Josh is
dancing right now.”

“Okay, why are you answering his phone,
Marie?”

“He left it here, sitting on the bar, and I
saw your name pop up. He’s been talking about you all night long,
sweetheart. My girlfriend, Jen, and I are out for a girls’ night.
We’ve been trying to keep the vultures away from him.”

I was so mad that I was shaking from head to
toe. “Is he drunk?”

She started laughing again. “Ah, you could
say. Listen, do you want to come get him? I can drive his car back
to your place, and Jen can follow me. He seems like he really loves
you. I’d hate to have some whore try to hook up with him
tonight.”

Wow, this is
unexpected.
“Okay, yeah. Where are
y’all?”

“Fado’s.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can, but I’m not
twenty one, so I can’t come in.”

Marie gave me her cell phone number to call
when I got there. I grabbed my purse and headed out the door.

***

By the time Marie and Jen had helped me get a
drunker-than-drunk Josh in my apartment and into my bed, we had
become close friends. It turns out they had been keeping the girls
away from him all night since all Josh did was talk about me.

“Let me just tell you this, Heather. That boy
passed out on your bed right there is madly in love with you. He
wouldn’t stop talking about you all night. I hope y’all can work
things out. He seems like a nice guy,”