Save Me (22 page)

Chapter Fifty

Rose hit the road after lunch with the Vaughns, who were happy to babysit for the day. She was heading east under clear, sunny skies, starting to feel better, stronger. The highway lay open ahead of her, and she hit the gas, whizzing past gorgeous autumn foliage, strip malls, and small towns. It felt good to be moving forward, taking the initiative instead of reacting all the time. She’d been so defensive, ducking for cover since the school fire, and even before, since Thomas Pelal.

Mommy!

Rose heard his voice and honored it, for once, not trying to shake it off. She’d felt horrible and guilty for so long, always dreading that her worst secret would come out, and now that it had, as awful as it was, she could finally exhale. The truth really had set her free, and she was willing to let the chips fall. Now Leo knew everything about her, and while she prayed he still wanted her, she couldn’t control him or anybody else.

Her phone rang on the seat beside her, and Rose decreased her speed and picked it up. She recognized Oliver’s number on the screen, but she didn’t want to have this conversation on the fly. The traffic was light, and she pulled over to the shoulder, spraying gravel, and pressed ANSWER. “Hello, Oliver?”

“Rose, I’m returning your call. I hope you’re feeling better since we spoke.”

“I am, but not for the reason you think. Oliver, why did you say I was suing the school?”

“I said you were
thinking about
suing the school.”

“Oliver, I asked you not to do that. We discussed it, remember?”

“No, you told me you were going to talk with Leo, and I ran into him at the courthouse. I told him about our conversation, and he gave me the go-ahead to say that you two were thinking about suing the school.”

“Leo?” Rose asked, surprised. “He said that?”

“I thought you said if it was all right with him, it was all right with you.”

“I didn’t say that.” Rose recovered. “I’m sorry if you misunderstood me. Just because I told you I wanted to talk with him, doesn’t mean you can talk to him and get his go-ahead. Leo’s not your client, I am.”

“He recognizes a good defense strategy when he sees one, and I hope you’ve come around.”

“No, and I won’t.” Rose didn’t get angry. For the first time in a long time, she felt supremely in control. “The very suggestion that I’ll sue the school is damaging to my family. The office was stone cold when I called today, and I can’t imagine how Melly can attend a school that her parents are suing.”

“They have no right to react or retaliate, and I’ll send them a cease-and-desist letter, immediately.”

“Oliver, they’re human, they’re people. They have feelings. You can’t cease-and-desist feelings.” Rose would have laughed, in another mood. “I’ve tried, and it doesn’t work.”

“Rose. You’re in very serious trouble, have you forgotten? Civil suits and criminal charges may be brought against you, any day now. The smartest thing for you to do is pre-empt them and file first.”

“I’m not sacrificing my family for my own hide, and the school didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Of course they did. The blond teacher at the door let Amanda—”

“Enough.” Rose wanted to get real, finally. “It was an emergency, and that teacher did her best in the circumstances, just like I did. Do you think she wanted Amanda to get trapped in the fire? Did anybody really want
this
?”

“They left the doors propped open.”

“It was
hot,
Oliver. People make mistakes, and they don’t have to get sued for them.” Rose was thinking of Thomas Pelal. “Don’t you think that teacher feels bad enough? For the rest of her life?”

“Fine,” Oliver snapped. “Then we won’t sue, but you need good press for the public and the jury pools. We need to spin the story our way.”

“No, it’s not about the spin, it’s about the truth. I’m not suing anybody, or threatening to. That’s just being a bully. I hate bullies, and I’ll be damned before I’ll turn into one.” Rose came finally to the point. “Oliver, I’m sorry, but you’re fired.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“I am. Bill me for the time we spent, and I’ll send you a check.”

“Rose, I’m the best criminal lawyer in the state. What are you going to do?”

“I’ll figure it out. Good-bye, Oliver.” Rose hung up and was about to start the engine when she caught sight of the dashboard clock.

And got a better idea.

Chapter Fifty-one

Rose pressed L for Leo and waited for the call to connect. It was 5:15, and court would be adjourned for the day. She knew the trial schedule because she’d helped him once in court, and he usually got a break before dinner and the night’s witness prep began.

“Hey,” Leo said coolly, taking the call.

“Hi. Did I catch you at a bad time or a good time?”

“I only have a minute. We’re about to go eat.”

“I figured, so I’ll get to the point.” Rose could hear the distance in his tone, but she hadn’t expected more. “I just got off the phone with Oliver. He said you told him that it was okay to say we were considering suing. Is that true?”

“Yes.”

“Why did you say that? They’re angry at me in the office, and I don’t blame them.”

“I sent you to Oliver because he’s one of the smartest lawyers I know, and he came up with a brilliant defense. Let him do his job.”

“He won’t be doing his job for me anymore, I just fired him. Litigation isn’t always the answer, Leo. You’re thinking too much like a lawyer.”

“Can you blame me?”

Suddenly Rose realized what Leo had meant the other day. “Honey, listen. I’m sorry for not telling you about Thomas Pelal, and for how I’ve been acting. You were right. I haven’t been thinking of us as a family, and now I know how it feels. Lousy. Because you weren’t thinking of us as a family, either, by telling Oliver to go ahead.”

“I
was
thinking of us. That’s why I said that. The best way to protect our family is to sue the school.”

“No, it’s not. Do you know what they’ll do to Melly? Her life will be hell.” Rose didn’t get it. “If we’re really partners, it’s fifty-fifty, and nobody has veto power over the other. So I won’t do it to you, but you can’t do it to me.”

“I don’t have time to deal with this now.” Leo sighed, tense again.

“I’m not expecting you to. Also, I don’t want to keep things from you anymore, so I’m telling you that I’m about to visit Kristen and ask her why she left school. I think she might have known about the fire, or maybe have been involved.”

“
Really?
”

“Yes. The kids are with Gabriella and Mo.”

“What are you going to do?” Leo asked, his tone changing to concern.

“Talk to her. Find out the truth.”

“Is that wise?”

“I think so, and I have to do it.”

“That’s what law firm investigators do. Whichever lawyer we hire next can deal with it.”

“Going to see Kristen is something I have to do, for myself, by myself. You may not understand it or agree, but I’m not asking your permission. I’ll let you know what happens. I gotta go.”

Leo paused. “Babe, what’s come over you?”

“Adulthood,” Rose answered, with a smile.

Chapter Fifty-two

It was sundown by the time Rose found Virginia Avenue, parked across the street from Kristen’s house, and cut the ignition. Lavallette turned out to be a small, sleepy beach town on an island off the Jersey shore. The street was wide, criss-crossed with sagging telephone wires and lined with two- and three-story homes interspersed with bungalows. The Cantons’ address was a newer three-story that looked like it contained several apartments. The apartment was 2-F, and Kristen was probably home, because a light was on in the second floor, front.

Rose grabbed her purse and got out of the car, then walked across the street and up the steps to the house, scanning the names by the buzzers. There were six, and Canton was next to 2-F. She buzzed 1-F, next to William and Mary Friedl. In a minute, an older woman answered. “Yes?”

“Mrs. Friedl, I’m sorry, can you buzz me in? My husband has my key and he’s still at the beach.”

The door buzzed, and Rose went inside, climbed the stairs, and knocked on 2-F, standing in full view of the peephole. “Kristen, let me in. I have to see you.”

“Rose?” Kristen opened the door, her eyes an astonished blue. “What are you doing here?”

“I might ask you the same question.” Rose entered the apartment and pushed the door closed behind her. “You told me you were in Maryland.”

“You can’t stay.” Kristen edged backwards, a book in her hand. Her russet hair was in a ponytail, and she had on a gray sweatshirt with black gym shorts. “Please, leave now.”

“Why don’t you call the police?”

“Why are you here? How did you find me?”

“That’s an odd question. Are you alone?” Rose glanced around the small living room, but it seemed empty and still, with a tan couch, matching chairs, and a big TV. Pictures of seashells covered the wall above a white entertainment center. “What are you up to, Kristen? You lied to me this morning about where you were, and I want to know why.”

“Go, please.” Kristen tried to walk to the door, but Rose stood in the way, sliding her phone from her purse.

“Let’s call the police. You can explain to them that you just happened to be out of school the day it exploded, saving your own life but killing three other people, including your sub, Marylou Battle.”

Kristen’s eyes flared. “What are you saying?”

“I think someone rigged the explosion that caused the fire, either you or someone from the general contractor, Campanile, working with you.”

Kristen gasped. “That’s crazy! Why would I do that?”

“I don’t know, but you’re running away from something, and believe me, I know running away when I see it. It’s my MO.”

“You’re wrong.” Kristen sank into a wicker chair, placing the book next to the cushion in her seat. “I had nothing to do with the fire. It was an accident.”

“Then why were you out that day?”

“I was sick.”

“You didn’t seem sick when I saw you. You don’t seem sick now. And why did you lie to me on the phone today?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“It is so my business. You used to have lunch with Melly in that lounge. I have a right to know what’s going on, because I trusted you with my
child
.”

“You’re wrong.” Kristen flushed behind her pretty freckles. “I’m here because I wanted privacy, like I told you. I’m worried about those crazy parents, and the reporters, too.”

“You could have told me or the school where you were.”

“I did tell the school.”

“That’s another lie, Kristen.” Rose felt anger flare in her chest. “They’re forwarding your mail to your parents’ house. That’s where you told them you were.”

“I don’t have to tell everybody everything.” Kristen squirmed in her chair, and Rose noticed the book she’d been reading, tucked by her side. Its cover wasn’t visible, but she’d know that spine anywhere. Before Kristen could stop her, she reached over and snatched the book from the chair.

“I thought so. I read this book twice.
What to Expect When You’re Expecting
.”

“This isn’t your business,” Kristen said, stricken, and Rose dialed back her tone, sitting down opposite her on the couch.

“You’re right. But if you ask me, it’s time to tell the truth.”

“No.”

“Try it. It works, and maybe I can help.”

“I don’t need help.”

“Kristen.” Rose lowered her voice. “You’re pregnant and hiding it from everybody. That sounds like a girl who needs help.”

“Okay, so I’m pregnant.” Kristen’s eyes brimmed, but she blinked her tears back. “My boyfriend Erik’s in Reesburgh, in the insurance business. He broke up with me, and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to tell my parents, and they’re away anyway, so I came here to get back on my feet. That’s why I was out of school the day of the fire. I had morning sickness.”

“So you didn’t know the fire was going to happen?”

“No.”

“And you had nothing to do with it?”

“Of course not.” Kristen laughed, sadly, and Rose felt relieved and puzzled, both at once.

“So your boyfriend doesn’t want the baby?”

“It’s not that. He doesn’t know I’m pregnant. He broke up with me before I found out, and I’m not about to tell him, now.”

“He does have a right to know. I bet he’s the one trying to find you. Somebody called your parents’ house for you, the housesitter told me.”

“It was him. He calls my cell all the time, but he doesn’t want me back.” Kristen wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “He wants his stupid truck keys, which I threw in the ocean.”

“Aw, I’m sorry.”

“Me, too, but not about the truck.”

Rose smiled. “Why don’t you tell your parents? I’m sure they’ll help, and they’d want to know.”

“You don’t know my dad.” Kristen shuddered.

“What are you going to do about the baby, if you don’t mind my asking?”

“I think I’m keeping him, or her,” Kristen answered, confident. “I think I can do it on my own.”

Rose’s heart went out to her. “What are you living on?”

“Savings, and I have money I inherited from an aunt. I’m fine, thanks.” Kristen’s lower lip buckled with regret. “I’m sorry I left Melly in the lurch, I really am. That’s why I called you this morning.”

“I know.” Rose got up, went over, and gave her a hug. “Eat crackers every morning, first thing. Old-school Saltines. You won’t feel so sick.”

“Thanks.”

“I’d better be going. It’s a long drive.” Rose went to the door, then stopped. “Let me just ask you something. Do you remember seeing cans of polyurethane in the teachers’ lounge, recently?”

“Yes. They were varnishing the cabinets. I remember there were WET PAINT signs everywhere, and it reeked.”

“When?”

“Thursday, the day before the fire. Why?”

“Somebody told me that the polyurethane is partly the reason for the explosion. It was left there, and it blew up.”

“So?”

“So I don’t get it.” Rose shrugged. “Why does anybody varnish cabinets in October, a month after school opens? Especially if it smells and is going to ruin peoples’ lunch. It doesn’t make sense.”

“I don’t know. Maybe a second coat?” Kristen got up, walked to the door, and held it open. “You won’t tell anyone I’m here, will you?”

“No, but you should.” Rose went into her purse. “Here, take this.” She found her wallet, pulled out a hundred bucks, and handed the money to Kristen, who put up her hand like a stop sign.

“No, I couldn’t.”

“Yes, you have to. Please.” Rose put the money in Kristen’s hands. “Good luck, sweetie.”

“Thanks. This is so nice of you.”

“Oh, wait. Take this, too.” Rose pulled a folded paper from her purse, opened it, and showed it to Kristen. “This is Melly’s drawing of the two of you. That’s Albus Dumbledore in the hat.”

“I knew that,” Kristen said, with a newly teary smile, and Rose gave her a good-bye hug.

“Call me if you need me. And Melly wants you to know we eat Kristenburgers.”

“They’re yummy, right?”

“Not in bulk.”

Kristen laughed. “Can I keep the picture?”

“Sure.” Rose went to the door. “I told Melly I mailed it to you, and that’s the last lie I’ll ever tell my daughter, except for Santa Claus.”

It was dark when Rose hit the street, but before she went back to the car, she walked to the beach and took off her shoes, enjoying the sensation of the cool sand as she went down to the shoreline and stood at the edge of the very continent. She still had a blister on her ankle, and the chilly wavelets rolled over her feet, healing and good. The gray foam made pale, shifting lines, one after the other all the way to the black horizon, where sea blended with sky. The stars shone bright white, encrusting heaven, and the full moon was a perfect circle, like a paper hole left by a hole-puncher in school. She breathed in the salty smells and the cool wetness of the air, standing at the intersection of summer and autumn, and at a crossroads in her life, too.

She thought of Leo, hoping she hadn’t left him behind, because she wasn’t sure where she was going. And she didn’t know what to do or think about the school fire, either. She stared into the blackness at the horizon, looking for answers, knowing a line was surely out there, but she couldn’t see it. Still, she looked hard and tried to find it, and she found herself thinking of Kurt Rehgard. He was gone, and she didn’t know where he was going, either. Or where her mother had gone, or her father.

She thought about death, and life starting anew, in Kristen. And she thought about the place between life and death, where Amanda slept, waiting to wake up, or not. She said a silent prayer for her, and realized that Thomas Pelal had been there, too, in her mind. She had kept him alive, in death, for so long, and it was time to let him go. She realized that letting someone go was setting them free. So she set him free, letting his spirit soar over the great churning sea and up, up, up into the heavens.

The wind blew her hair back from her face, and she breathed in deeply, inhaling one lungful after another, letting it energize and renew her. She kept an eye on the horizon, or where she thought it was, and understood that not everything that existed could be seen. Not every border was clear. She kept thinking of Kurt and the fire, sensing that something still seemed out of whack. She didn’t know the answers, and she didn’t even know the questions, but they were out there.

As surely as earth met heaven.