Saturday's Child (17 page)

“I’ll hold you to that. Do you want to ride with me or your brothers?”

Meggie hesitated. What she wanted conflicted with what duty told her to do.

“If you take Megs, we’ll follow,” Cadfael said. “We’ll drop her off here on our way home tonight. That way you can finish your conversation.”

Meggie glared at him. “And what conversation would that be?”

“The one you were trying, oh, so hard
not
to have.” He winked. “The condition being, we take all the welsh cakes with us to eat as we decorate.”

“I was planning on it.” Meggie rolled her eyes. “I don’t want a riot if I forgot them now, look you.”

****

As he drove, Aaron glanced at Meggie. She hadn’t said a word since they’d left her place. “I see what you mean about them teasing you.”

“It’s even worse when all seven of them get together. It’s ‘pick on Meggie’ day then.”

“Isaac and I used to have ‘pick on Leah’ days. They’re fun.”

“Depends who’s picking on who.”

“True. What were you going to say, before you realized the others were watching you?”

Color tinged her cheeks and it only accentuated her beauty. “Just that I’m more than a little fond of you.”

He smiled. “I’d kind of worked that one out.”

She twisted in her seat. “How?”

“The way you kissed me. Actually, the fact you kissed me at all. Sometimes you look at me as if you’re scared or you expect me to jump on you or something. I’d never hurt you; I hope you know that.”

“Sorry. It’s taken me a long time to be able to trust men. Most men I still can’t be around, but you’re not most men.” She paused. “You don’t think we’re rushing this? I mean we haven’t known each other a week yet and you’ve got Nancy and I’ve got Ted—in the past that is.”

He stopped at a traffic light and glanced at her. Trust men? What had this Ted person done to her to make her so frightened of men? Maybe he should just back off, slow things right down. “I don’t think of Nancy when I kiss you.”

“And now instead of Ted, it’s your face I see.” She drew in a deep breath as they pulled away from the lights. “I don’t know where this is going, it could be the situation throwing us together, heightening our emotions.”

He touched her hand briefly. “Or it might not be. How about we just go with it and see what happens?”

“Sounds good to me.”

****

Standing in what used to be the red room later that evening, Aaron marveled at how much they’d achieved and in so short a space of time. Her brothers had a system which surprisingly worked. While he’d painted the ceiling, and Meggie painted the skirting boards, Gareth and Cadfael had stripped all the red paper off the walls.

By the time the ceiling was done, two walls were stripped and ready for the new paper or paint. He papered one wall, and decided on paint for the remaining three. Meggie and her brothers had stayed until gone nine in the end, and the room was finished. He just needed to move the furniture back in and rearrange it. Once he’d decided what to keep and what to throw away. He’d half a mind to chop it up, add it all to the wood pile, and burn it.

In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he liked that idea. Both the women he loved had been attacked in the bed that now stood on the landing. It was best to destroy it. He looked at the picture of Jesus in his hands and then hung it back on the wall. It needed a new frame. Something he could do on the Internet tonight, along with replacing the furniture. If he ordered it tonight, it might come Monday or Tuesday.

Tomorrow was Sunday and he was going to church. And that was something he was looking forward to doing.

15

My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death. Psalm 22:15

The church hadn’t changed in the three years Aaron had been absent. Meggie, as promised, was waiting for him, sitting on the wall, her legs swinging. “Morning, Aaron,” she said, getting to her feet. Her smile lit the grey morning.

“Hello.” He returned the smile, his heart pounding against his chest wall. Could she hear it? Would he make a total fool of himself before he even got inside, by tripping up the steps or something stupid? “How are you?”

“I’m fine. And so glad that you’re here.”

His smile grew. “I said I would be, and I want to be.”

He followed her inside and glanced around. The church hadn’t changed on the inside either. The carpet, paint, décor, and smell were just the same. Familiar, warm, and comforting. It was like coming home.

Several people greeted him as though he were a long lost brother or the prodigal son—which he supposed in a way he was. But would God be so welcoming? He’d strayed so far, done so much, that perhaps he was beyond hope now. Meggie led him down the aisle to what she told him was her normal seat. He put his new Bible in the chair in front of him and took in a deep breath. It was good to be back. He pulled out the service sheet and began to read it.

“Aaron?”

He glanced up as a tall, Irish man took the seat next to him and beamed. “Liam, it’s great to see you. How are you?” He took the offered hand and shook it warmly before it turned into a one armed manly hug.

“I’m doing well. What about you? I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“I’m OK.”

Liam pulled a woman close to his side. “I’d like you to meet my wife. This is Jacqui. Jacqui, this is Aaron Field. An old school friend.”

Jacqui leaned across and shook Aaron’s hand. “Pleased to meet you.”

“And you.”

Liam grinned. “And if she thought being an English teacher with the surname Page was funny, you’d better not tell her you’re Farmer Field. She’ll never let you forget it. How have you been keeping?”

“I’ve been better. The farm’s not doing too well, but that’s the way it goes.”

“Times are hard for all of us.”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

The organ began playing and a sense of longing flooded him. It wasn’t enough to simply be here. His soul burned and ached within him. He felt empty.

Jack nodded to him from where he sat on the platform as Pastor Bruce stood and began the service. The first hymn “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing” cut Aaron to the core, as if someone plunged a knife into his chest.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love...

Did they know he was coming? Had Jack chosen the hymn deliberately?

Let Thy Goodness like a tether bind my wandering heart to Thee
.

The children’s talk twisted the knife deeper and somehow he managed to stand to sing the children’s hymn.

Put your armor on if you want to fight as the foe draws near in the darkening night…

The main prayer section seemed aimed directly at him, although he was sure it wasn’t. Pastor Bruce prayed specifically for those in turmoil and being attacked spiritually, without mentioning any names.

The weight upon him increased.

By the time the third hymn was announced, Aaron was overcome with the weight of sin and loneliness and regret.

He remained seated as everyone stood to sing, burying his head in his hands. Being here wasn’t enough. Nothing was enough. He’d fallen too far to ever be forgiven again.
God,
he began, not knowing what to say to put things right. The singing flowed over him, mixing with the tears filling his eyes.

“Just as I am without one plea, but that Thy blood was shed for me, and that Thou bidst me come to Thee, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.”

A hand touched his shoulder and Liam’s calm voice whispered in his ear, praying for him. “Lord, God, You alone know what is troubling Aaron right now, but I get the impression he is wrestling with doubts and fears, trying to measure himself and coming up lacking. He feels unworthy to be here, just like I do sometimes. But, just as we are, filled with doubts and sins, wretched and blind, we can come to You, Lord. Because You are all that we need. You take the pitiful state in which we come, and give us healing, forgiveness, and a welcome. Lord, Aaron needs You, and You promise that You will receive with open arms all those who come before You and call on Your Holy name.”

The singing continued into the next hymn. Aaron looked at Liam. “I don’t know what to say. What if it’s been too long, what if it’s too late?”

“It’s not too late. God knows how you feel, truly feel inside. Just cast everything onto Him, give Him all your burdens and sins and He’ll forgive you, right here and now.”

Closing his eyes, Aaron prayed again the simple prayer of his childhood. At once, the heaviness fell away and the emptiness inside him vanished. Love and peace took its place. Along with a knowledge that he was forgiven, and that everything would be all right.

Tears slowly fell unbidden and he felt Liam’s hands rest on his arms, as he began praying again.

As the hymn finished, Liam looked up. “Do you want to go out for a few or are you all right?”

“I’m OK. Thank you.”

“Welcome. We’ll talk after?”

Aaron nodded as Liam leaned back in his seat and everyone else sat.

Meggie’s hand slid into his and squeezed tightly. “Are you all right?”

“Better than all right.” He settled back in his chair, and let Meggie turn his Bible to the passage they were studying–Psalm one hundred and fifteen. Verses ten and eleven, the theme verses, hit him like a hammer.

House of Aaron, trust in the LORD— He is their help and shield. You who fear Him, trust in the Lord—He is their help and shield
.

Hope rose in him that things really would be better now. He had God filling him, and he was determined to make good on the promises he’d made. With God on his side, what did he have to fear?

****

The service over, Meggie turned in her seat to speak to Aaron. His eyes were bright and glistened as he raised his head. But he glowed. A peace and joy emanated from him that hadn’t been there at the start of the service. Before she could say anything, he hugged her tightly. She looked over his shoulder at Liam, whose broad grin matched Aaron’s.

He pulled back. “Thank you.”

Not sure what she had done to deserve his thanks, she accepted it none the less. “You’re welcome. You look happier than when you got here.”

His smile lit the whole church. “I am. I found Him, Meggie. God loves me. Everything’s going to be OK.”

She hugged him tightly. “Oh, that’s wonderful.”

He pulled back and tucked her hair behind her ear, wanting to kiss her, but not being brave enough. “So thank you for inviting me this morning.”

She caught his fingers in hers for an instant. “My pleasure.”

Liam put a hand on Aaron’s shoulder. “Let’s go get some tea and finish that conversation.”

“Sure.” His gaze held hers for a moment. “You don’t mind?”

“Course not. I need to chat with Jacqui for a while anyway.”

“OK.”

She smiled. “And I’m sure Pastor Jack wants a word too, see how things are at home now.”

He kissed her cheek briefly and smiled as he stood. “Probably. But I want to take you for lunch somewhere, just the two of us. If you’d like that?”

“I would very much so. Thank you. I’ll come find you in a bit.” She swiveled to one side to allow Aaron and Liam squeeze past her. She sidled up to Jacqui. “How perfect. While they’re talking, I don’t suppose we could talk about the catering for the bonfire, could we?”

Jacqui grinned. “I have no idea how I got roped into doing that. I’m assuming Liam put my name forward because I certainly didn’t do it.”

“Probably.” Meggie pulled out her notebook. “OK. I figured we could ask the ladies to provide cakes like we do for the guest services. No doubt we’ll get enough to feed an army that way.”

****

Aaron sat with Liam on one side of the church hall, a buzz of conversation around them. He drank his tea, filling Liam in on everything that had happened the past few years. “So since Jack prayed, the house has been calmer, but it’s only been like a couple of days. Things might change when Tanis gets back.”

“It’s possible. Does your lawyer think you have a chance of overturning the codicil?”

“I don’t think he’d have taken the case if he thought otherwise. But even if he doesn’t win and I lose the farm, God has a place for me somewhere. I just hope…”

Liam grinned. “Does a certain Welsh lass have anything to do with this?”

His cheeks burned. “She is rather cute.”

“She is. And she seems to have caught your eye.”

“I’ve known her less than a week—”

“And you’re already passed the hand holding stage by the looks of things. You know, it took me over a month to hold Jacqui’s hand. More than that to kiss her.”

Aaron smiled wryly. “Yeah, well. We’re just taking it one day at a time. She’s got seven older brothers, so I have to watch my step.”

Liam laughed and stood. “You had. I’d better go find my wife. Don’t leave it so long next time.”

Aaron stood and gave him the one-armed man-hug. “I won’t. And thank you for earlier.”

“Anytime. I’ll see you tonight.”

He stood there as Liam headed off and glanced around for Meggie. He saw her in conversation with Cassie and started over to them.

Pastor Jack walked over to him. “Aaron, how are you?”

He smiled. “Hey, Jack. I’m good. How are you?”

“Doing OK. How’s the house?”

“Quiet, warm, the mold has gone. Tanis wanted to know what I’d done as the house didn’t feel right.”

Pastor Jack looked at him. “That’s interesting.”

“That’s exactly what Meggie’s pastor brother said.” He smiled. “And I’m glad I came. Because God was here waiting for me to find him. With God on my side, I’m safe no matter what.”

His friend’s smile matched his. “I will keep praying for you.”

“Thank you. I’ll need it.”

“And if you want me to come over on Friday and pray around the house and farm again, I will.”