Sabin, A Seven Novel (41 page)

Holding me close, he caresses me. “Yes, you can. You can tell me anything. You’re safe here and nothing will hurt you.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about.”

He rubs the side of my cheek with the backs of his fingers. “Sometimes the worst fears are the fears themselves.”

“I wanted him. Sexually.”

He tries to hide his surprise, but I see his eyes widen fractionally. Then he glances down momentarily. “Did he make you feel that way?”

“I don’t know. Yes. My mind is kind of foggy now. All I remember is this intense sexual desire.”

“But he didn’t …”

“No. He didn’t want me.” I start to weep again. Big fat tears that roll down my cheeks at the speed of light. “I’m sorry. I didn’t
want
to want him. And he did this thing with his voice that hurt me.” My whole body shudders with the memory. My fingers touch my head because I remember hitting it on the floor. I wince when I find the tender place where I must’ve bruised myself.

He sits there motionless, as though he’s in a trance. When I try to extricate myself from his arms, he tightens them. It makes me cry harder.

“Please,” I begin.

“I’m going to kill him, Serena. Did he hurt you anywhere else? Do anything else to you?”

“I don’t know. I hit my head, but then I kept getting weaker and weaker until I don’t remember anything. He must’ve drained all my energy or something. I tried to touch him and couldn’t.”

Sabin stiffens. “What do you mean?”

“My hands couldn’t get through whatever surrounded him. Some type of invisible wall, I think.”

He’s quiet again for a bit, but then he says, “Serena, we’re going to have to put a probe into your brain and extract some information from you—information that you can’t recall. It can help us when we go back to …”

“Kill him?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t go. I don’t want you to get hurt. He told me he was going to kill
you
.”

He’s back to rubbing my cheek. “That’s why I want to probe your brain. There may be some little piece of data you unknowingly picked up. It’s safe and you won’t even know it’s happening.”

“I’ll do anything to help. You know I will. But Sabin, how can you stand me after what I’ve done?”

He pulls me back so I’m forced to face him. “You’ve done nothing wrong. It was done
to
you. He invades minds. That’s why he’s called the Mastermind. You were unequipped to deal with that. And it’s my fault you weren’t guarded more appropriately.”

“Why am I speaking his language?”

“We’re going to find that out, too. The probe may enlighten us.”

I have to ask him the next question. It’s something I need to know for me … for my heart. “Sabin, do you want to send me back?”

The place between his brows crinkles. “Send you back?”

“To Earth? To my home?”

“Ah.” He nods. “You want to leave me, then.”

“I would think that’s what
you’d
want.” I swallow the lump—no, it doesn’t qualify as a lump. It’s more like a mountain that’s jammed in my throat. I need for it to get the hell out of there so I can say my piece here. Filling my lungs with air, I press on. “It’s like this. Your men hate me, except for Edge. Rafe told me to go home. I seem to bring a great deal of bad luck to you. You keep risking your life for me, and I ask myself why.”

“Do you want to leave, Serena? Do you want to go back to Earth?”

“Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do.”

“You haven’t answered my question.”

“No! I want to be with you, but I’m not sure you want me anymore.”

“Whatever gave you that idea?”

“You would barely speak to me before all this. What was I supposed to think? You didn’t come to me for nights. That’s why I went to Rafe to ask for help. Then he said those awful things to me …”

“Rafe has been taken care of. He will apologize to you as soon as you’re ready to speak to him.”

“I don’t want to speak to Rafe ever again.”

“He will, whether you want him to or not.”

“I won’t accept it.”

“That is your choice. As for me, I was buried in my own grief and should’ve reached out to you. For that, I’m sorry. I’m not used to sharing my emotions with anyone. This,” he waves his hand between us, “is still something I’m adjusting to. I’m not very good at it, either. I intend to be more open with you in the future. But the question still remains. Do you want to stay with me?”

“Only if you want me.”

“I’ve never stopped wanting you, Serena.”

“And you can accept me even after what happened with that awful man?”

His hands gently frame my face. “I was worried you were being raped, or worse than that, killed. I can accept you in any way, as long as you’re alive.”

His words that flow freely from him bring another round of tears.

“No more crying, Serena. I want to see you happy again.”

“I am.”

He kisses my closed lids, and says, “You expect me to believe you, when you weep as you do?”

I bury my face into his chest, just happy to be held by him. “I missed your scent.”

“I missed yours, but not as much as I missed you. You need food, Serena. The unit you were in helped your body heal, but you’ve lost weight. We need to get some of Kernell’s cooking into you.”

“Yes, I think I could eat a little.”

“Good, because your food should be arriving in at any time. And Serena, there’s something else I need to tell you.”

“More bad news?”

“Not in my opinion.”

“So?”

“You’re going to have our baby.”

My fingers circle his wrist and they tighten. “I think I heard you wrong.”

“No, I don’t think you did.”

“I’m pregnant?”

He’s grinning like I’ve never seen. “Yes.”

“How?”

He smirks. “Serena, do I really have to explain how it all works?”

Ignoring his little question, I go on. “And you’re obviously happy about this?”

“Ecstatic. But I don’t think you are.”

“I’m shocked. It’s so unexpected. Is he okay?”

“And how do you know it’s a he?”

“I don’t. I’m just saying.”

He places a hand on my flat belly. “He’s fine. The medical unit brought you back to perfect health and SIMD deems you’re both fine.”

My hand covers his. “A baby, huh? I guess one of your little swimmers made it through then.”

“Yeah, I guess so. I take full responsibility. I was careless with my use of the sperm killer. But I’m not sorry, Serena. And I hope you’re not either.”

“No, I’m not sorry.” If I’m completely honest, I’m excited about having Sabin’s baby, even though it is a bit scary. Motherhood. Whoa! “How did I not suspect this? I mean, shouldn’t I be throwing up and all?”

“I guess you’re one of the lucky ones.”

A knock on the door interrupts us. Sabin helps me to my feet as Graylyn enters. We greet each other as she places the tray down and leaves. I end up gobbling down the scrumptious meal that Kernell made for me right as another knock is heard.

Sabin says, “Come in,” and suddenly a puppy is barking at my feet.

“Walter!”

On Walter’s heels is Edge. At first he says nothing. He reaches out and grabs me in a bone-crushing hug, lifts me off the floor, and turns around in a circle. I’m instantly struck how much alike Walter and Edge are—playful and full of youth. I can’t help but chuckle.

“I was so worried about you … worried I’d never see you again. Don’t ever do that again, Serena. You gave us all such a scare, especially your Sabin.”

I take a peek at Sabin and he rolls his eyes, something I’d never think I’d see.

I pat his back. He’s like my big puppy. I feel I should rub him behind the ears or something. “Thanks. I’m good now, Edge. But you’ve gotta quit hugging me so hard. You about cracked my ribs.”

“Why are you speaking in that language?” he asks.

“I don’t know. But we’re going to find out.” Sabin explains the plan, while I play with Walter. At least Walter doesn’t ask me any questions about the language thing. He just plants tons of slobbery puppy kisses all over me while I giggle. Then he runs around in a circle and promptly pees.

“When was the last time he was out?” I ask Edge.

“Ten minutes ago. That dog is an unending source of urine.”

“Ugh. Is he ever going to stop this?”

“Don’t ask me. I’ve never had one of these,” Edge says.

When I look at Sabin, he only shrugs.

“What the hell were you all thinking when you got him for me?” I ask.

In the driest voice I’ve ever heard come out of him, Sabin replies, “Clearly, we weren’t.”

“But Serena, look how much he loves you,” Edge reminds me.

And I look down to see the little nugget standing there, staring at me with huge puppy eyes, and his tail going a hundred miles per hour. Edge is right. That damn dog is adorable and does love me. I scoop him up in my arms and give him a big smooch. At this rate, he’ll never get house trained.

“And I love this little nugget, too.”

Someone else knocks on the door.

“Enter,” Sabin says.

This time it’s Rafe.

I take one look at him and my anger explodes. “You sack of rotten dicks. How dare you waltz in here and show your face to me.”

“Serena, wait.” Sabin stands between us and for whatever reason it looks like he’s trying not to laugh. This is not a funny moment for me.

“Why should I wait?” I point at Rafe and say, “That inflated hairy testicle is to blame for all this.”

Now his body shakes. “Inflated hairy testicle?”

Without hesitation, Rafe steps directly in between Sabin and me, and goes down on one knee. Whoa. What is he doing?

“Serena, I owe you an apology for my despicable behavior. I will not bother making any excuses. There are none. I treated you horribly and can only hope you can find it within yourself to someday forgive me. In the meantime, I will act as your humble servant, should there ever be a need for one. And I accept being called a sack of rotten dicks, a hairy testicle, or whatever label you put on me.”

Double whoa. Was not expecting this at all. But it’s still not enough.

“Get up.”

His expression registers shock. I suppose he thought I would fall for his crappy apology.

“I said, get up.”

Rafe stands and I do give him credit for looking me square in the face. But I don’t back down one bit. In fact, I believe this is my crowning moment. I actually step into his frame, reach down, and grab his balls. While I tighten my grip, I see him squeeze his eyes shut, and not with pleasure. “I don’t know what I ever did to you to warrant such treatment, but I’m not sure I can bring myself to forgive you. I came to you for Sabin, not me. He’s supposed to be your best friend and where I come from, you always have your best friend’s back. The way you spoke to me was unforgivable. But let me say this. If you ever treat me like that again, I’ll shove these balls up your ass so far, you won’t be able to walk for a month.”

Now his eyes widen and he swallows before saying in a tight voice, “You’re right. I acted like an ass, but will never treat you without respect the way I did that day. If you ever need anything, please do not hesitate to ask.”

“I won’t and you’d better deliver.” I let go of him, and he takes one step back, turns, and leaves.

“Bloody hell, Serena, did you have to do that?”

“Yes, I had to do that. He was the cause of all this. And did you put him up to this?” I ask.

“Not at all. This was Rafe’s own doing. We, of course, had many words over his behavior. But this was all him.”

Rocking back on my heels, I give them both a satisfied grin. “Well, I hope he thinks twice before he treats me like shit again or doesn’t help his best friend. And for the record, I still think he’s a sack of rotten dicks.”

Edge and Sabin look at each other as they share something. “What?” I want to know.

“Serena, you may think the men don’t care about you, but you’re wrong. When you disappeared, it was an all out effort to find you. Everyone was involved, and they all risked their lives for you. It wasn’t just me. Or Edge.”

How will I ever repay them for what they did?

Sabin, in his usual way, stops my train of thought. “You don’t have to repay them. It’s what we do, Serena.”

“I … I …”

Edge holds out his hand. “What would I have done without you? It was never a choice. We had to go.”

I take his hand and squeeze it. He flashes me one of his little boy grins, and I give him one in return. I’m getting ready to tell him how much he means to me, too, when yet another knock lands on the door. Jeez, will they ever end? This time it’s Verus and a man I’ve never seen before. Sabin introduces him as the engineer called Shaday.