Running Blind (8 page)

“Nothing worth talking about.”

“Who was he?”

“Nobody. Just a guy I thought I loved and who was supposed to love me.”

“That sounds like something worth talking about to me.”

“That's because you didn't live it.”

“Did you dump him or did he dump you?”

“You're awfully persistent, Nikolai.”

“Only when I'm interested in something.”

“Interested in what? A story that's two years old?”

“Interested in you.”

“Why?”

“As you said, we can't understand a person until we know where she's come from.”

“Maybe I should have asked why you'd want to understand me. Are you wondering how I got into this mess? Why a drug cartel as notorious as the Mexican Panthers wants me dead? Because if you are, knowing about my past won't help you. There's nothing there that would have brought this on.”

“I know that. What I don't know is how a woman like you has managed to stay single for so long.” The words slipped out before he could think better of them, and Nikolai wished he could grab them back.

What was he thinking, saying such a thing?

Obviously, Jenna wondered the same thing. She stiffened, her hands fisting in her lap. “It's easy to figure out, Nikolai. I tried the commitment thing. It didn't work out. I have no desire to try it again.”

“I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business.”

“You're right, but since you saved my life, I guess I can forgive you for being nosy.”

“Nosy is a good quality in P.I.s, and it's what's going to
help me help you.” He pulled into the Sheraton parking lot, easing into a space close to the building.

“Just concentrate on proving Magdalena's innocence. I'll worry about keeping myself out of jail.”

“It's not jail I'm worried about, Jenna. Do you think the guy who came after you today will be the last of the Panthers' henchmen?”

“I'm hoping so.”

“Then you're hoping in vain.”

“You can't know that. I've never had anything to do with the Panthers. They've got no reason to keep coming after me.”

“Then why are they?” He asked the question though he knew Jenna had no answer. Neither did he, but he planned to find one.

“I don't know. Maybe the guy the police arrested will answer that question for us.”

“Maybe.”

But they both knew that wouldn't happen. The most they could hope for was that the police would prove that the gun the guy had been carrying was the same one used at the Romero house. Without that connection, he'd be out on the street in no time.

“I guess I'd better get moving. My family is probably wondering what's taking so long.”

“I'll walk you in.”

“That's not necessary, Nikolai.”

“We both know it is.” He got out of the car before she could argue, walking around and opening the door for her, inhaling the scent of vanilla mixed with the antiseptic hospital smell that seemed to cling to both of them.

Jenna grabbed his hand, allowing him to pull her from the car. Her hand was cool and dry, her skin silky against his palm. She'd clutched his hand earlier, clung to him as she'd faced the police. She did the same as they walked across the parking lot and into the building, the warmth of her touch
searing through Nikolai, reminding him of childish dreams of a wife and a family and a happy home.

But a man like Nikolai could never live that dream. He'd known that for years, had accepted it just as he'd accepted his solitary life for what it was—part of who he was.

Still, as he pushed the elevator button and felt Jenna's hand tighten on his, he couldn't help wondering if time had changed him, if
God
had changed him enough so that he could shoot for the dream and try to make it a reality.

A
2:00 a.m. flight out of Houston was exactly what the doctor ordered. At least that's what Jenna told herself as she zipped her duffel, grabbed her purse and checked it for her passport and driver's license. Going home to her little house on the outskirts of Spokane, Washington, would do a lot to ease her stress. That would cut down on the headaches she'd been having. Fewer headaches would mean sleeping better, which would mean having a better appetite and, hopefully, improved blood counts. The last thing she wanted was another trip to the hospital and another round of medical tests.

In a few minutes the police escort Kane had insisted on would arrive and Jenna would be on her way home. She'd go back to the quiet life she'd been living before she'd agreed to accompany Magdalena to Mexico, but nothing would be the same. There was no way it could be.

Magdalena was dead.

The Mexican Panthers wanted Jenna to meet the same fate.

The police seemed determined to pin drug-crime convictions on Jenna.

And God was in control.

That was what Jenna's father had said before he'd kissed her goodbye and headed for the airport with Jenna's mother. It was what Jenna had repeated to Kane as she shooed him out of the hotel and into a cab an hour later.

She believed it. Probably more than she ever had before, but that didn't mean she wasn't scared.

She paced to the window, peering out into the darkness. As hard as she'd worked to convince her family to go back to their lives, she couldn't help wishing they were with her. A little conversation, some laughter—those things would go a long way in easing her tension.

She glanced at the clock, frowning. Her escort should have arrived. It was a forty-minute drive to the airport, and she didn't want to miss her flight. She grabbed the phone, dialed Officer Daniels's number and jumped as someone tapped on the door.

She tossed the phone back onto the receiver and hurried to the door. “Who is it?”

“Nikolai.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked as she opened the door. He'd changed out of the suit he'd worn to the funeral, and Jenna caught a whiff of soap as he walked into the room.

“Kane called me. He told me that you managed to get a flight out of town.”

“And you came to say goodbye?”

“Would that make you happy?” He sat down, his long legs stretched out, his arms folded over his chest. His biceps pulled at the soft fabric of his shirt and dark stubble shadowed his jaw. He looked strong and tough and perfectly capable of taking care of business, whatever that business might be.

“It's nearly midnight. You could have called and said goodbye rather than coming all the way over here.”

“I thought we could ride to the airport together.”

“I'm sure Kane told you that he asked Officer Daniels to give me a ride and escort me to the boarding gate.”

“And I'm assuming he didn't tell you that I was coming along.” He offered an easy smile.

“I haven't spoken to him since he left for the airport.”

“He called me just before he boarded. I'm sure he planned to call you once he landed.”

“He asked you to ride to the airport with me?” That didn't surprise Jenna. Her parents and brother had been reluctant to leave her in Houston for even a few hours. It had taken plenty of convincing to get them checked out of the hotel and on their flights home.

“No. He just wanted to let me know that you were leaving town. Everything else was my idea.”

“Everything?” Jenna wasn't sure what that meant, but she had a feeling she wasn't going to like it.

“I'm going to escort you to Spokane.”

She'd been right. She didn't like it. “That's completely unnecessary.”

And completely unacceptable.

In the worst days of her cancer treatment, when she'd desperately needed Ryan's support, she'd felt the distance between them growing and had known that the love she'd believed in was a lie.

Nikolai was different. He was a man who'd draw closer during a crisis, who'd give whatever was necessary without thought to his own needs. She'd seen that over and over again in the past week. And she'd found herself clinging to him. Holding on when she should have backed away and let go.

“You don't think so?”

“I'm not your responsibility, Nikolai. So, no, I don't.”

“Then we see things differently.”

“I appreciate your concern, and I know you're trying to help, but I have to keep living my life the way I always have.”

“Do you think that will make your troubles go away?” He watched her through narrowed eyes, his dark gaze skimming over her white T-shirt and peasant skirt, assessing her in a way that made her cheeks heat and her heart pound. She turned away, staring out the window and willing her pulse to slow.

“No, but moving on with my life will make me feel more in control.”

“I understand.” Fabric rustled as he stood, but Jenna didn't
turn to face him. She didn't want to see the interest in his eyes. More than that, she didn't want to respond to it.

“Then you'll understand why I'll have to insist that you not do this. You've done enough for me already. I won't ask you for more.”

“You've asked me for nothing. I'm worried about you, Jenna. I want to make sure you make it home safely. Is that so difficult to accept?”

“Yes. It is.”

“Why?” He cupped her shoulders and urged her around, his dark eyes searching her face.

“Because, I don't want to go back to depending on anyone.”

“And being disappointed?” His hands fell away, but their warmth lingered.

“That, too.”

“I won't disappoint you, Jenna. If you need me, I'll be there for you.”

“You don't get it, Nik—”

A soft tap interrupted her words, and she hurried to the door, glad for a reason to end the conversation.

“I'll get it.” Nikolai stepped in front of her, his broad shoulders blocking her view. “Who's there?”

“Officer Daniels.”

Nikolai opened the door, stepping aside to let the officer in. “Thanks for coming.”

“No problem. I planned to come out anyway. We finished questioning our gunman, and we were finally able to get his identity. His name is Brent Lamar. He's a known affiliate of the Mexican Panthers. The gun he was carrying was a match to the weapon that fired the bullets we found at the Romero house.”

“Did he give you any reasons?”
For wanting me dead
was on the tip of Jenna's tongue, but she couldn't make herself say it.

“He's not saying much of anything, but we're working under
the assumption that he had orders from the Panthers. We're hoping to work out a plea bargain. Lesser charges in exchange for information, but I can't promise he'll go for it.”

“We can pray he does,” Nikolai said, lifting Jenna's duffel bag and carrying it to the door.

“Prayers are about all we've got right now. The good news is, we don't think you have to worry about the Panthers anymore. Word on the street is that they're lying low for a while.”

“And you believe that?” Nikolai obviously didn't.

“Generally, our informants are on the money.” Officer Daniels stepped into the hall, and Jenna followed, Nikolai close on her heels.

“Your informants are also criminals. They would tell you anything if they were paid enough to do it.”

“You have a point, but I don't think that's the case this time. The DEA has confirmed that the Panthers are staying in Mexico. There hasn't even been a whisper of a hit being put out on Jenna.”

A hit being put out on her? Jenna would have laughed at the idea if it weren't so horrifying. “Why would there be? I haven't done anything to get on their hit list.”

“And, yet, there have been two attempts on your life. Maybe they think you know something. Or maybe it's simply a matter of pride. You did escape their stronghold, after all. And that's unheard of.” Officer Daniels shrugged.

“I should send them a note of apology and ask them to leave me alone.” She tried to smile, but it fell flat.

“How about we just get you on the plane home?” Nikolai took her hand, squeezing softly. She knew she should pull away, but she didn't. It felt too good to have his support.

“Are you coming to the airport with us, Jansen? If so, you'll have to ride in the back of the cruiser.”

“I'm flying to Spokane. I'll follow you to the airport.”

“Sounds good. Do you want to ride with me, Jenna? Or will you be riding with Nikolai?”

She
should
ride with Officer Daniels, but for reasons she didn't want to admit, even to herself, she decided against it. “I'll ride with Nikolai.”

If he was surprised, Nikolai didn't show it.

“Sounds good.” Officer Daniels pressed the elevator call button. “I'll escort the two of you into the airport and to the security gate. Once you're past the gate, you should be safe. We have contacted the Spokane County Police and the Washington State Police. They're aware of what's happened here and will offer whatever assistance you might need.”

“Before or after they search my house and decide if I'm a drug dealer?” The question slipped out, and Jenna bit her lip to keep from saying more. Officer Daniels had been more than kind, and Jenna's rudeness was poor payment for that.

“I understand how you must feel, but I hope you understand that we have to pursue every avenue when we're investigating a case.”

“What case? The one against the Mexican Panthers or the one against Magdalena?”

“She was your friend, Jenna, but that doesn't mean she didn't commit a crime.” Officer Daniels's sympathetic tone did nothing to make Jenna feel better.

She didn't argue, though. She'd said all she would about Magdalena's innocence. Until she was able to prove it, she'd keep her thoughts to herself.

The night had grown chilly, the crisp spring air heavy with moisture. Shadows drifted across the pavement as Officer Daniels walked them to Nikolai's car. A cool breeze whipped at Jenna's hair, and she shivered, wishing she hadn't shoved her jacket into the duffel bag.

“Cold?” Nikolai slid an arm around her waist, pulling her up against his side. His warmth seeped through her T-shirt and his scent surrounded her, a mix of soap and masculinity that Jenna couldn't ignore no matter how much she tried.

“No.”

“Then why are you shivering?”

Because she
was
cold.

And scared.

And tired.

And being near Nikolai was too much of a distraction and a temptation.

She frowned as he opened the car door. “I don't think this is a good idea.”

“What?” His arm slipped from her waist, his breath ruffling her hair as he reached in the car to grab a pile of papers that lay on the passenger seat. The scent of mint seemed to fill the car, and Jenna's thoughts jumped back a week to the moment Nikolai had walked into her life and pulled her from the brink of death. He'd smelled of mint and leather, and his hands had been gentle as he'd touched her arms. She'd been too terrified to notice more than that, but those things had stuck in her mind and filled her dreams.

“Your driving me to the airport and escorting me to Spokane. You heard what Officer Daniels said. The Panthers aren't a threat any longer.”

“You believe that?”

“I want to.”

“Yeah, me, too. But I don't. There's something going on that we don't understand, Jenna. Until we know what it is, you can't afford to take chances.” He closed the door and walked around the car, and Jenna knew he was right.

She couldn't afford to take chances and that should have made her eager to have an escort home. And she
was
eager. Maybe even too eager. The fact was, spending more time with Nikolai wouldn't be a hardship and that worried her. She had a good life to go home to. A predictable life that didn't pose any risk to her health or to her heart. That was the way she wanted it.

At least that's what she'd been telling herself for the better part of two years.

But maybe predictable was boring and maybe taking
risks was the only way to truly find what was missing from her life.

Missing?

She scowled, not liking the direction of her thoughts, and she was still scowling as Nikolai got into the car and started the engine.

“You look unhappy,” he said as he pulled behind Officer Daniels's police cruiser. “I'm not.”

“Then why do you look as if you'd like to bite someone's head off?”

“It's just been one of those days.”

“It seems to me that it's been one of those weeks.”

“That, too.”

“Things will get better.”

“Good to know, since I don't think they can get any worse.”

“That's the spirit.” Nikolai patted Jenna's knee, his palm warm through the fabric of her skirt. She could hear the smile in his voice, could feel herself slipping into dangerous territory, allowing herself the luxury of companionship and friendship and maybe something more.

She'd had those things with Ryan. Believed in them as much as she'd believed in forever. When it ended, she'd known she never wanted to feel that way again.

And now she was in a car, riding toward the airport with a man she knew could turn her life upside down.

It wasn't a smart move.

Not smart at all.

Her head knew it, but her heart didn't seem to care.

Jenna bit back a sigh, her gaze on the dark road and the police car leading them to airport. She had enough on her plate. She didn't need to waste time worrying about Nikolai. There were more pressing things to deal with. Like the fact that the Mexican Panthers might still want her dead. Like the fact that the police seemed convinced that Magdalena had
been involved in drug trafficking. Like the gigantic mess that she'd found herself entangled in.