Authors: D. Hamilton-Reed
Royce was at the sideline. He handed the chairs to Dillon and Deon, “Here set these up bo…”
“No Tammy no!” Someone shouted.
“You whore! You slut!” He heard suddenly cutting him off. He turned and saw Tammy standing in front of him and Joy, her eyes red, tearful and flashing anger, “You’re a whore and a slut! You tricked him into not wearing a condom! Amanda ran into Michael and he told her what you’d done!” She pointed back at Amanda when she said that, “That you never wore a condom! You never wore a condom! You’re a liar! A liar!” She was mad as hell shouting her words and looking from Joy to Royce.
“Tammy get a grip on yourself!” Royce screamed at her matching her loud shouting, “Amanda told you this! Amanda! She just ran into Michael and they talked about condoms! Are you kidding me! Yeah right, that’s why they met!” He yelled at her and Amanda turned three sheets of pale and her mouth dropped and she knew he knew.
“She tricked you into not wearing a condom! She’s a whore and you’re a liar!” Tammy yelled at him, and before he could say another word he felt Joy’s arm push him out of the way and step in front of him.
“Let me tell you something! Don’t you ever think of calling me out my name again or I will snatch every strand of blonde hair out your head and kick your behind all over this damn field! There’ll be a soccer game alright it’ll be my foot up your behind!” Joy yelled up in her face, “I don’t tolerate anybody calling me out my name!” She glared at Tammy.
“You tricked him and you know it!” Tammy yelled at her.
“Do you hear what you’re saying? Why would I need to trick him? He’s not a child, he’s an adult, I can’t make him do anything! He can choose to wear a condom or not! And he chose not to! I chose not to! You happy now! Is that what you wanted to hear, we didn’t wear a condom! I’m so sick of this condom bullshit! Is that what you and your little friend Amanda wanted when she told you, you wanted to create a scene, cause all this drama! Well you got it, are you happy now, are you happy now Amanda!” She said looking at Amanda and Tammy, “I came to watch a game!” She walked off and left Tammy standing there and Royce followed.
Joy sat down and pulled the stroller between her and Royce. Amanda was teary eyes and shaken, Collin looked stricken, and everyone else didn’t know what to say or do, but their shocked stunned expression said it all. Dillon had his head down, Deon and Lindsey looked sad, Royce was fuming, and he looked at Joy and she was angry. Tammy sat in her chair, wiping tears, her foot bouncing up and down and she kept crossing and uncrossing her legs bouncing her foot, and Justin slept through it all.
And Karen had a terrible game and Royce’s heart broke. He knew she was going to blame Joy this time, and when the final whistle blew he was so grateful, he couldn’t wait to get out of there. Joy hadn’t said one word to him or looked at him the whole game. He kept taking glances at her and she sat there, her back straight an angry look on her face, and he wanted to walk over to Tammy and Amanda and slap the shit out of both of them for causing this. He gathered up his chair, Joy stood and he folded up hers and she still wouldn’t look at him. The kids were quiet and folding up their chairs, they had been quiet the whole game. He looked over and saw Karen as her team filed down the line slapping hands against the other team the signal of good sportsmanship, but her head was down and he knew she was going to go crying to her mother and he winced at the thought.
Royce saw the teams disperse and sure enough Karen started walking fast off the field and she walked over to him and fell into his arms crying, “I’m sorry daddy, I’m so sorry daddy,” she cried. She’d run into him so hard he stumbled backwards and he was so shocked at her outburst he was taken aback, he was readying for an attack not this. “It’s okay honey,” he tried to soothe her, knowing it was far from okay.
They gathered up their things and to his surprise neither Karen nor Dillon went to their mother. They solemnly followed him, all the kids carrying lawn chairs. He eased Justin in his car seat, thankful he hadn’t woken up and he knew it was from the quietness at the game; it was quiet for a change where they were sitting. Bobby and the rest were quiet as they watched, so for Justin he was able to sleep and not be woken up by sudden cheers, he stirred a little, then relaxed back into sleep.
When everyone was in the car, Joy said, “I’m sorry Dillon and Karen I had to be ugly to your mom, and I’m sorry Lindsey and Deon you had to hear mommy talk ugly like that, but I will not have anyone call me out my name like that, especially those names she called me. I will not put up with that from anyone,” she said.
Joy and her sisters had put up with jealous girls all through school, all because they had lighter skin and long hair. They had to thank her father for that, he was half Cherokee and black, his mother was Cherokee Indian and her grandfather was a very light skinned black man, he was probably bi-racial but no one knew, so because of her heritage and upbringing she learned to stand up for herself long ago and she was not going to let Tammy or anyone get away with calling her a whore. “Yes ma’am,” Royce heard solemnly and he drove home in a quiet car and pulled up in the driveway.
“Give me my keys Royce,” the first words she had spoken to him and he handed her keys to her. He opened the trunk and the kids and Joy filed out. “Lindsey stay with Justin, Deon get your things we’re going home.” “What? No Joy, no!” She was heading in the house and Royce stopped unloading the chairs and went after her. “No Joy, don’t let her do this to us, don’t,” he followed her into the house. “I’m going home Royce!”
The children went into the house, Deon stopped not knowing what to do, “Get your things Deon, I’ll get Lindsey’s we’re going.” “Joy, Joy, wait, just wait a moment,” he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her to him, “Don’t let her win, don’t let her win,” she pulled away. “Royce I just need to go okay, just let me go.” She was in the guest room now gathering up her things. Royce closed the door, “Joy, please stop, just stop and listen,” he pulled her to him again. She was so mad he could see the anger flashing in her. “I can’t do this Royce, I can’t deal with this okay,” she said looking at him and pulling away, “I don’t want to see you anymore, this is not for me!”
“What! No, how can you say that, don’t say that, don’t say that,” he went to her again. “Stop it Royce, stop! I need some space! Just give me some space okay!” He dropped his hands and let her go. He sat on the bed and she threw her things in her bag and left. He heard her in Justin’s room and then he heard the side door close and her car pull off, and he sat there on the bed. Joy didn’t want to see him anymore, she needed some space away from him, he sat there his heart broken and the perfect day shattered.
He sat there for a long time, his face in his hands, wiping a few tears that escaped. When he came out Dillon and Karen were sitting in the family room, just sitting there. He walked past them and into his room and sat on his bed and picked up the phone, he had it to his ear about to dial Joy’s number. He wanted to fix this and then he put it down, she didn’t want to see him anymore. He couldn’t believe the turn of events of this day and he didn’t know what to do so he put on his workout clothes. He needed some release or he thought he might explode.
He was so angry at Tammy and Amanda, it was their bullshit that caused all this! Joy he was so proud of her, she stood up to all of them, “We didn’t wear a condom, okay. We didn’t wear a condom, is that what you wanted to hear!” He was so proud of her but now she didn’t want to see him, Tammy had won, Tammy had won! Tammy had been trying to break him since he brought Justin over to the house and now she’d finally done it, he was broken.
Karen and Dillon were in their rooms when he walked out. He went upstairs to the workout room and closed the door. He laid on the sit up bench, his head lower than his feet, he braced his legs in the bars that held him in place, “One, two, three….” He began and then he was going at a fiendish pace, “45, 46, 46, 47, 48, 48, 48...Ahh fuck!” “One, two, three…” He started over, he couldn’t believe Joy broke up with him and didn’t want to see him again, “She broke up with me,” he said out loud, “55, 56, ….,” “What the fuck number am I on, fuck!” “One, two, three…” He couldn’t think, he was sweating now, he laid there breathing hard, catching his breath, he wiped wet sweat from his face and he knew a tear or two was in there. “We had it, we had it! We were free, free of Michael, free of Tammy…the bitch!” “Fuck! One, two, three…” “Arrggggg!” He let out a sob, “One, two, three…,” “That fucking bitch Tammy!”
Karen was distraught and blamed herself, she’d invited Ms. Joy. She never thought about what her mother would do, it just didn’t cross her mind that her mother would do that to another person, sure she would tear into her dad, he was her husband, but another person! She couldn’t imagine what her teammates were thinking and she couldn’t concentrate on the game at all after she saw her mother angrily stride over to her dad and Ms. Joy. She couldn’t hear everything, but she heard loud shouting, she saw her coaches and teammates looking over there too, she was mortified.
Her father was hurt, Ms. Joy had left him, she was so mad she left him and her father seemed lost. He’d sat in the guestroom a long time, now he was up in the workout room. She and Dillon were beyond worried about him, and it was her fault,
why can’t her mother just leave him alone!
She gets mad about everything he does and he doesn’t mean anything by it, but she just won’t…just won’t leave him alone! Her father had been in there a long time and she was scared for him so she walked up to the door a couple of times and she heard him still working out, talking to himself, a few curse words sometimes and she thought she heard him crying,
poor daddy, I’m so sorry
and she wiped tears from her eyes.
She went downstairs and picked up the cordless phone and took it up to her room and dialed her mother, “Mooomm! How could you? How could you?” “I was so mad honey, I didn’t mean to…,” “But you did and you hurt daddy. You hurt daddy and he didn’t even do anything…,” “He brought her and you know I can’t stand the sight of her…, “He didn’t mom, I did!” Karen burst into tears, “I did, I asked her to come!” She wailed. “Why would you do that Karen? Why would you do that?” “I didn’t know you would do that! I didn’t know you would hurt daddy like that! I don’t think he’s okay mom, Ms. Joy left him and he’s upset and crying,” she said worried about her father. “Well serves him right, maybe now he can feel what I’m feeling…” “Mom stop that…no wonder daddy hates you!” She thought her mother wouldn’t act like that anymore, especially after she wrote her dad the letter.
She’d told her to write it, she’d said, “Apologize for calling him and doing that to him,” she’d told her mother and Tammy balked at first and then she said, “He won’t like you if you don’t,” and her mother wrote the letter. She thought she wanted her father to love her again and wouldn’t behave like that anymore. “Karen honey you shouldn’t say things like that,” and she could tell she’d hurt her mother. She went on, “He does hate you, because you act so stupid that’s why he hates you. He hates you!” And she heard her mother cry,
good
she thought,
now she knew how it felt when somebody did something to you that you didn’t like.
“Good bye mother,” she said and hung up.
Royce came out after a long while. He’d tried to work out his demons and he came out drenched and soaking wet. He knocked on Karen’s door, “You want something to eat?” “Yes daddy,” she was famished, she’d been hungry since they came home, “Okay, I’ll order pizza.” She knew her father was upset now, since Ms. Joy had taught them to make their own pizzas they never ordered pizza. Now she left balls of dough in the freezer and when they wanted pizza they just took it out and let it thaw and they loved working the dough. Her father closed her door and she could see the sad hurt in his eyes,
it was my fault, but I got mom back, I got her back
, she thought, and about forty minutes later her father was calling her and Dillon down for dinner.
They sat there and her father could barely eat, he was eating so slowly, he’d sit and think, then he’d take a bite, he’d chew slowly, thinking as he chewed. To Royce the pizza tasted like cardboard, and the act of chewing was a chore, he had no appetite really, he was eating because he thought he should spend some time with the children, but his mind wasn’t on them or the awful pizza. It was on Joy and that she’d left him, just like that she’d broken up with him. It was so unexpected that his heart hadn’t recovered from her words yet.
Later when the Karen and Dillon were upstairs he went to bed, he’d tried to keep busy, and occupied and he’d picked up the phone a thousand times to call Joy and each time he put the phone down, “
I can’t do this anymore! I need space, give me some space!”
Her words rang in his mind and he put the phone down and now he lay in bed tossing and turning. Joy didn’t want to see him, his crazy ex-wife drove her away and he knew if he could help it he would never speak to Tammy again, that apology letter she’d written didn’t mean shit! This was it for her and if he did speak to her someone might have to drag him off her ass, or he would strangle the life out of her! The room was dark and he was thinking of Joy and unable to sleep and finally he got up and went into the family room and lay on the sofa the TV on. The bed reminded him too much of Joy, her lying there in his arms, her smiling up at him as he took pleasure in their lovemaking, him and her laughing at something that was funny. Joy was gone.
Karen heard the TV, it had been on for a while. She went down to see what her dad was watching. He was asleep on the couch,
I’m sorry daddy,
he looked so peaceful, but she’d seen the torment he was in today. She went to his linen closet and found a blanket and came back and covered him and took the remote that was lax in his hand and turned off the TV. Next she clicked off all the lights and went to her room and went to bed. She could sleep now, her father was okay.