Rounding Third (12 page)

“His friends are dickheads, too, huh?”

She nods, and a small curve of her lips emerges. “I hate that they knew this whole time. But you know what I hate the most?”

“What?”

My finger lazily moves back and forth along her shoulder. She doesn’t stop me.

“That you saw it.”

“Me?” I point to myself, as though she doesn’t know what she admitted. “Why?”

“I don’t know. I’m embarrassed that I let someone do that to me, that I was blind to the signs. I honestly thought he was worried about his studies and getting into medical school. Never did I suspect he was cheating on me. You’ve been here, what? A week? And you already knew.”

“Hey, hey.” I dip my head down until our eyes meet. “Don’t ever be embarrassed in front of me. I always have your side, and nothing can change the way I look at you.”

She throws herself into my arms and slides closer, her bare legs pushing into my chest. “I’ve missed you so much. You know the worst thing?” she mumbles into my shirt.

I draw back to hear her clearer.

“I was relieved he was cheating because I knew we could break up, and I wouldn’t have the guilt if you and I were to date.” She bites the side of her lips.

“Is that what you want? To date?” This whole elation, like a kid going to his first circus, develops inside me, no matter how much I try to calm it back down.

“Crosby, I can’t promise you anything. I still need time to process your return, but there’s no way I can deny the love I still have for you.”

I wrap my arms around her shoulders and pull her into me. The fear in her eyes of us starting a relationship is too much to see right now. There are continued doubts occupying her happiness of my return, and I’m not going to push her into something she’s not ready for.

“We’ll go slow. Reconnect and see how it goes.”

“Thank you.” She sits up next to me, not leaving my arms, and she kisses my cheek.

“You never have to thank me. I’ll let you lead this relationship, but tomorrow, I’d like for you to come to my scrimmage against Creekside.”

She places her hand on my cheek. “I can’t wait to see you play.”

A smile overtakes her mouth, and my body calms for the first time in two years.

“I should get going. I have to get a good night’s rest before the game.”

I move to stand, but she stops me.

“Stay a little while.”

How can I refuse her wishes? So, I sit back down. “Sure.”

She unclicks the mute button on the damn Lifetime movie she’s watching.

“No Lifetime.”

“Okay, but no ESPN either.”

I steal the remote. “I’m sure we can compromise.”

She cuddles up into my body, leaning her head on my shoulder.

“Where is your roommate tonight?” I ask since I figure the two of them are always together.

“She’s on a date.”

“She’s not with Saucey. I just left him.”

“She told me they have some mutual understanding.”

“Yeah, Saucey gave me the same line at the bar tonight when he was lecturing me on how much pussy I could get from diamond girls.”

She inhales a hefty breath and looks up to me. “Please, Crosby.”

“Hey, hey. You have no worries there. Ever.” I kiss the top of her head to hopefully convince her that I won’t cheat on her, but my actions will prove it to her.

J
en lays
her elbows on the bench behind us, basking in the sun shining down on the hot metal. Her sunglasses are in place with her chin pointing toward the blue sky, making her resemble a fashion model. All she needs is to be lying on a beach with a bikini. She’s gorgeous, and she knows it.

“So, what’s up with you and Tyler?” I pretend to be casual, as though Snapchat posts on my phone are more important than her answer.

She huffs and crosses her legs. Then, she uncrosses them and crosses again. “He’s fun.” Her head never swivels my way.

“And?”

The seats are starting to fill in, but Jen doesn’t move. This might only be a scrimmage, but Ridgemont loves to cheer on their only current team with victories.

“And nothing.” She tips her sunglasses down to her nose, shooting me a you-know-what-I’m-talking-about look. Then, the dark lenses cover her hungover eyes once again.

“Come on, Jen. You guys find each other at every party. There was the whole altercation at the baseball house. I’m supposed to be your friend.”

She sits upright, pushing her sunglasses to the top of her head. Her eyes bore into mine for an uncomfortable second. I shift in my seat, taking out my ponytail and then positioning it back.

“And I’m supposed to be yours,” she says, tilting her head, as though she’s waiting for me to say something, anything.

“You are.”

“Then, how come I had no idea about that mouthwatering guy on third?”

My eyes instinctively move to the field where Crosby is grounding balls from the coach hammering them out. His fundamentals have improved, which only shows how much he must have continued to train these last two years. The funny thing is, he’s always portrayed this athleticism that he must have been born with. So, for him to improve says more about his determination to have a future with baseball.

Brax rises from his squatting position and throws the ball to Crosby, hard. Crosby throws it to Saucey, who throws it to second base, who gets it to Oliver, and then it goes back to Brax. They’re working like a team, and I wish the joy that I feel because Crosby has found his place again didn’t take residence in my heart. These boys are thoughtful and caring. He’ll never escape Ridgemont without forming a few friendships.

“So?” Jen’s voice pulls me from my thoughts.

I look over at her and then back on the field.

“We were eighteen and agreed to separate.” I can’t hide the crack in my voice.

“Why? Wanted independence? Not be committed when you went to college?”

I wish. More like we were brokenhearted from being together.

I look over at her once more. For a moment, I see Kedsey. Maybe I’ve never given Jen a fair chance to be close to me. I shame Crosby for not letting people in, but I’ve kept Jen at arm’s length. Being her savior helped me seem perfect in her eyes—until Crosby arrived.

“We were in a car accident. Our friends”—I stop, inhaling a deep breath—“died.”

A low, “Oh,” echoes through the still of the air.

And I’m transported to the hospital room when Crosby told me.

T
he boys had won
the state championship. Between Braxton, Crosby, and Noah, our team was unstoppable. My best friend, Kedsey, and I waited for the bus to return to school. After the boys got off, Crosby and Noah barreled over to us. Crosby and I had been a couple for two years, almost as long as Noah and Kedsey. Braxton went off with a few of the other teammates, and Crosby asked me for the keys.

The boys were on cloud nine, and their happiness was contagious to Kedsey and me. We climbed into my Honda Civic, and Noah and Kedsey’s lips immediately locked.

“Can you please wait until we get up to the hill?” Crosby joked. He crashed his lips to mine at the red light.

The horns honked behind us, and a pickup full of their teammates swerved around us.

“You guys are whipped!” they screamed.

Crosby looked over at me. “And proud of it,” he said. He kissed me again before gunning the engine.

“Shit, man, slow it down!” Noah hollered, taking his mouth off Kedsey for a few seconds.

“Why don’t we drop them off and go back to my house? My parents are probably sleeping already,” I whispered to Crosby.

“Fuck no. You know Kedsey’s mom stays up until she returns, and she’s got damn cameras around that house. I need my girl tonight,” Noah spoke up.

Kedsey giggled her agreement. “Come on, guys. Have some mercy on us,” she added.

Crosby shrugged. “We’ll have fun,” he assured me as he squeezed my knee.

We got to the hill, and immediately, Noah and Kedsey snuck away.

That was the point of the hill. Teenagers would go up there, sneak into hidden dark areas, and have sex or drink. All four of us had done both, but tonight, I was only interested in spending time with Crosby. During baseball season, it was always hard to find time for one another.

With us graduating and off to college next year, our time was drawing to a close. Crosby had gotten a scholarship to Vanderbilt, and Kedsey and Noah were both going to attend State while Braxton and I were going to go to Ridgemont. Although Crosby and I would be separated, we were going to try the long-distance thing.

“Congratulations.” I knocked his shoulder.

He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me close. He kissed the top of my head. “Thanks, babe.”

“That double play in the ninth was awesome. You and Noah make such a great team.”

“Yeah. Too bad it was our final game together.” He looked down at me, a gleam in his eyes. “Until the majors, that is.”

We laughed. All of them dreamed of going pro, but they knew how fortunate they’d be if one of them made it to the top.

Crosby led me through the trees to our spot that overlooked the plant. White steam rose through the night air from third shift. Half of the town was probably down there working right now.

“I love you, Ella,” he said, referring to my nickname from when I was in grade school.

“I love you.” I looked up at him, adoring those chocolate browns.

We sat in silence for what seemed like forever until Crosby picked me up and put me between his legs. I turned around to straddle his lap, and his hands molded to my ass, rubbing back and forth along my jeans.

I started nibbling on his neck. Quickly, he was on his back, and I was lying on top of him, grinding along his hardness. We’d had sex numerous times before, but the atmosphere tonight was different. Crosby held my eyes the entire time he rocked in and out of me. Even though we weren’t fully unclothed in case anyone ventured near, it was the most intimate time I’d felt with him.

After we finished, we buttoned up. He lay on his back, and I snuggled up to him. As we stared up at the sky, the what-ifs weighed heavily on us, the promise of our future looming overhead.

“I promise, Ella.” His voice cracked. “I promise I won’t let anything get between us.”

He was the optimist, and I was the pessimist.

My words at the time still haunt me.

“You can’t promise, Cros. How many couples before us have said the same thing?”

“Stop saying that shit. We’re different.” He didn’t say it to me though. He said it to the night sky, as though he were wishing it on the stars above us.

I stood and wrapped my arms around his waist, leaning my head on his back that rose and fell with deep intakes of breath. “I’m sorry. I can’t stand the thought of it. I figure, if I’m pessimistic but we make it, it will be all that much better.”

A tear fell down to his T-shirt, and he swung around, wrapping me in his arms.

“We need to be strong, and we’ll make it. We’ll get through college. You’ll be my team physician one day, and we’ll never be separated again.”

I laughed at him putting our dream professions together. I was going to be pre-med starting in the fall, and he was going to major in business, but we both knew he was hoping for the baseball call.

He took my face in his hands and peered down at me with determined eyes. “So, listen to me, eyes ahead.”

I nodded at him giving me his father’s tagline.

“Eyes ahead,” I confirmed with a firm nod and a smile.

My alarm went off on my phone, signaling it was eleven thirty, so we needed to start wrapping up to get home before curfew.

“Time goes by so fast,” he said, wrapping his hand around mine and leading me back toward the car.

Kedsey’s phone must have gone off because she and Noah were waiting at the car, looking like they thoroughly enjoyed themselves.

“Let’s go. Kedsey’s mom called, and she’s about to call you.” Noah pointed to me, and at the same time, my phone rang.

I pulled it out of my pocket, noticing Kedsey’s home phone number. “Hi, Mrs. Bishop. Yep, we’re on our way home. Having a bite with the boys after the game. Sure will. Yep. Bye, Mrs. Bishop.”

I shook my head at Noah. “She sure doesn’t like you,” I commented as we climbed back into the car.

“Ever since she caught me in her house one night, I swear, the woman has hated me.” Noah held his hands up in the air.

“Dickhead, you were half-naked with your dick in Kedsey,” Crosby mentioned what Noah had failed to.

We all laughed.

“You should have seen her face of horror. Like I was stark naked, requesting her pussy.”

Kedsey slapped Noah on the shoulder.

“Ouch. You know it’s true. I mean, we’re two hot-blooded teenagers. Who’d be surprised we were fucking?”

He held his hands up, so she smacked his stomach.

“She’s my mother and supposed to believe in my virtue,” Kedsey chimed in.

We all laughed again.

“Sorry, babe. I took that virtue as soon as you sucked me off.”

Crosby held his hand up in the air. “Okay, way too much info, dude.” He glanced over at me and winked.

I was like a cat, wanting more of whatever he was going to give me. I loved this guy.

“Let’s get Kedsey home before you never get sucked off again,” I added.

Crosby rolled his eyes.

We pulled out of the gravel path overlooking our small town, and Crosby turned down the road. We drove for a while, singing and dancing to “Thrift Shop” by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. Kedsey unbuckled herself and leaned forward to sing the chorus with me.

We held the future in our hands. The boys were state champs, and we were going to college.

Then, Crosby slammed on the brakes, the car swerved, and soon, everything went black.

I
found
out later that I’d been unconscious for a good part of a day.

When I opened my eyes, Crosby was at my bedside, pacing back and forth, nibbling on his lip, like he did when he was nervous. A bandage was wrapped on the right side of his forehead. Scratches were on his face, and his left arm was in a sling.

“Hey,” I said, pulling him away from whatever was bothering him. I moved my hand, only to find a needle stuck in it. “What? Where are we?” I mumbled. I noticed the white sheets, white floor, and the turned off television hanging on the wall next to a dry-erase board stating my name and my doctor. My doctor? “Oh my God!” I screamed.

Crosby rushed over, grabbing my hand. “Calm down, baby. The accident?” he questioned, as though I should remember.

I didn’t. I remembered singing “Thrift Shop” with Kedsey’s cheek pressed along mine as we did our own rendition. Then, it all flashed in my eyes—the headlights, the squealing of tires.

He gripped my hand harder now, using both of his hands, and I saw it in his eyes before the words left his mouth.

“Noah and Kedsey…”

I shook my head. If he didn’t say it, it wasn’t true.

“They didn’t make it,” he finished.

A loud scream shattered in the room.

Nurses, my parents, and Crosby’s parents rushed into the room. Instantly, tears streamed down my face, and my body started to shake. Crosby climbed into the bed, ignoring the nurses’ protests. He held my head to his chest, and the sound of his beating heart calmed me until my body’s shakes were small trembles. My mom’s hand smoothed down my hair, and the two of them whispered how everything would be okay, but things were far from okay.

“
I
’m so sorry
,” Jen says next to me.

I shrug, as though attending your friends’ funerals at the start of your adulthood isn’t a big deal. Like I have it all together, but I am displacing, like the therapist nagged.

“Crosby and I were in the car,” I continue. My heart tugs on me, saying,
Don’t give our secrets away. It only opens us up to hurt
. Ignoring my heart’s pleas, I say, “Crosby was the driver, and we were both emotionally wrecked afterward.” My lips turn up, not meaningful though. “No pun intended.”

“Man, El, I don’t know what to say, other than I’m sorry.”

Jen wraps her arms around my shoulders, but I don’t want her comfort. I glance to the field in time to see Crosby’s eyes on me, and then a ball hits him in the arm.

“Fuck!” he screams.

All faces look over at him.

“What are you gawking at?” Brax steps up, pushing his mask up to the top of his forehead.

It’s as though the two of them can sense that I’m giving up a secret we’ve buried. They share a look of understanding with each other, and Brax nods his head to Crosby.

“Oh, boy.” I slide over like I’m a teenager whose dad found me making out under the bleachers.

“What?” Jen looks over her shoulder and then stands up. “Oh.”

A second later, Crosby’s cleats tap on the concrete step until I smell his masculine scent next to me.
How can one smell make you want to climb onto someone’s lap and bury your face into their neck?