Authors: Roddy Doyle
‘And now I was juggling two babies, two girls, Aideen and Pamela. And, of course, the grandparents were
delighted. In the Doyle household, there was no such thing as, “Oh, it’s a pity it wasn’t a boy.” Rory’s father always seemed to pray for girls. Pamela was a very quiet baby, placid and healthy; she hardly ever cried. I fed her on the bottle from the word go; I wasn’t going to have her crying with hunger. I fed Pamela on Sister Laura’s Food, the same as I had fed to Aideen. But nappy-washing was the bane of my existence. It was a terrible time of the year, and that November was an awful month. You had to soak the nappies in a bucket, and then you washed them by hand in the sink. You hung them out, and you hoped that God gave you a dry day. And you looked along the road – there were no walls or hedges yet; it was just wires between the gardens – and there were nappies flying to the left of you and nappies flying to the right of you. And maybe, “Hello, how are you?” and “How are
you?”
and the nappies going out. It didn’t matter what day it was. We broke the Sabbath, and out went the nappies.
‘The only social life consisted of meeting people and chatting, or visiting each other. There was a picture house in Sutton but we seldom got to it. The first time we went out was for our first wedding anniversary. We went to the pictures and had our tea out. That was a great treat. I can’t remember the film.
*
But I never felt isolated from the world. As far as I was concerned, this was the world. I always got a newspaper, the
Independent
, and the radio was a godsend. There were sponsored programmes. I loved the music. I used to join in; I had a bit of a voice then. “What’ll I do – when you – are all
alone …” “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” And the songs from the shows. “Whispering While You Cuddle Near Me”. There was the Hospital Sweepstakes programme; I liked the mix of music they played. And there was Frankie Byrne – she was Jacob’s biscuits – an agony aunt. And, of course, there was the Walton’s programme – “If you feel like singing, do sing an Irish song.” We bought a second-hand piano in Walton’s, when the girls were bigger, and I can still see old Mr Walton, a grey-haired, good-looking man, with a kind of a beard. There was
Living with Lynch
, with Joe Lynch; lots of Irish music, and the conversation was witty and easy. And then there was Din Joe’s programme. Din Joe became famous for having Irish dancers on the radio; it was the one thing he’d be remembered for. He was a big, heavy man, and he lived in Tallaght. And I believe – it may or may not be true – that when some of the kids said, “Hello, Din Joe,” he’d get annoyed with them, because it was only his stage name. He was actually a motor dealer.’
*
And I was really keen on
Mrs Dale’s Diary;
I looked forward to it every morning – it was the time I had my coffee. Looking back on it, she was such a smug lady, but it was great.
‘We went to Mass in Baldoyle, which was our parish at that time. And very awkward it was; it was like a country parish. There was a bus, but we couldn’t go together because of the babies. One of us went first, and then there’d be a second bus for the second Mass. I’d go to the first Mass, and it was a Father Dillon who said that Mass. He was a brother of that Fine Gael TD, James Dillon. He’d start off, and that was fine. But then he’d
get up to make his sermon. He’d take out his handkerchief, a big white handkerchief,
*
and he’d wipe his forehead and blow his nose, quite a loud blow of the nose. And then he’d begin talking. If the TD was good at talking, he wasn’t a patch on his brother. He went on and on, and on and on, and all I’d be thinking about was getting home and seeing if the girls were alright and getting the meat into the oven for the dinner. When that particular priest got older, he became very forgetful. One Christmas morning, I decided to go to Mass in Raheny instead – fortunately, because Father Dillon forgot it was Christmas Day and somebody had to go and wake him up. But he was getting on in years, so I suppose he can be forgiven.’
‘He was born in the same place where I had the girls. But I never saw him. Rory saw him. He was blue – his lips were blue – but Rory said he was a fine-looking baby, with black hair, and he was big. He was over the eight pounds, or even bigger. But they knew, from the time he was born, that there was something wrong with him. So he was taken to Temple Street Hospital straight away, and I never saw him. He lived just a day and a night. They asked Rory could they do a post-mortem, and they discovered that his whole insides seemed to be wrong – the valves of the heart weren’t properly attached, there was something wrong with his stomach, the bowels were all twisted. So, it was just a day and a night.
†
We called him Roderick Anthony. He had to be christened straight away and I said, “Call him Roderick Anthony.”
“Roderick” because that was Rory’s name. And “Anthony” for the simple reason that I was told that Saint Anthony was great; if I prayed to Saint Anthony, the baby would be grand. I gave somebody half-a-crown to put into Saint Anthony’s box in the church, and to light a candle. I thought, well, call the child after him and give him half-a-crown, the least he can do is take care of the baby. But he didn’t; he let me down. I don’t pray to Saint Anthony any more. I decided he was a dead loss.
‘He’s buried in the Angels’ Plot, in Glasnevin. Rory and my sister, Máire, went with him. I’m not certain what happened. But, even in death, there was something to laugh about. My stepmother had given Rory an umbrella for Christmas; you pressed a button and it shot open. Well, it was a wet, miserable morning and Rory had the umbrella with him. And himself and Máire were running for the bus after the funeral, and Rory hit the handle of the umbrella in some way, and it broke. The handle was full of some kind of white powder, like chalk, and it flew all over the place, on to him, on to Máire, on to the road and everyone in sight. The two of them held each other up, laughing.
‘I was kept in the nursing home the same length of time as if the baby had lived; I think it was ten days. It was very distressing, but Rory’s mother, I remember, sent me in wool. I had some patterns and I began to knit for the two girls. I was very upset, but I took everything and got on with it. You couldn’t be lamenting in front of the two little girls; they might have thought that he was more important than they were.
‘The strange thing is, three other babies died in the locality, at that time. All women around my own age, all
within a few months. I often thought about it but, in my usual procrastination, I never did anything. I always felt, well, these things were meant to happen; they happened, and that was it. It did seem very peculiar but, as it was, everybody accepted things that came along. They’d probably query the whole thing now.’
†
‘When all the payments had been made on the cooker, I had my choice of a fridge or a washing machine. Strangely, I went for the fridge. So, when that was paid for, I got the washing machine. I can’t remember the make, but you had to fill it from the tap with a hose, and the hose went out the back door, to empty it. But it was a miracle, in its way. And the mangle. Of course, there was no dryer, so I still had the problem of drying. But it was great. I was very busy, with the kids’ – she had three by now
†
– ‘and getting them to and from school, but I always managed to go for a walk in the afternoons. I enjoyed life. I used to meet Maura Coghlan, two doors down, and Aileen O’Connor, from around the back, and the three of us would go off, pushing the prams. We had great chats. And, in a way, life was easier than it is now. The kids had great freedom; they could play tennis and football on the road. The world was their oyster. We didn’t have to go rushing from this club to
that club and the other club, to keep them occupied. You could leave the doors open. They’d come home for their dinner, in the summer, and go off playing again; they were out from morning till night.
‘We didn’t get a television straight away. I remember the night that RTE started;
*
a couple down the road, the McCloskeys, had a television, and they invited us down to watch the opening programme. Down we went and, really, all we saw for the opening night was snow. You could see the odd little figure arriving through it, and you’d hear great laughing and joking, and then we’d get another fall of snow – but even to look at the snow was something. It was unbelievable, really. And when we got our own, sure, it was marvellous altogether. In the beginning, for about the first six months, I looked at anything; the whole thing was a wonder. I remember
Little Women
, and the cowboy ones,
McKenzie’s Raiders
, and
The Virginian
, and
Have Gun Will Travel.
†
I loved those westerns. Then RTE showed a lot of the old musical comedies. I’d seen them in the cinema and thought they were wonderful. I’m afraid, second time around, I lost interest; I couldn’t really watch them at all. Nelson Eddy and Jeannette MacDonald. The music was still beautiful, but you could listen to that on a record. I couldn’t take to all the dancing and swinging. Then there were the Laurel and Hardys, and all those silent films. I looked at everything at first, and just got a bit fussy after that.’
* * *
There was one more child. ‘He arrived too soon. He was five or six weeks early.
‘I began to bleed. We had the car by then, and I think Rory drove me in to the Rotunda. A doctor examined me and said I’d have to stay until the baby was born; otherwise I might lose it. That was kind of worrying, but it had to be done. I was only there a few hours – I remember being in the bed, and the labour pains started. I said to the nurse that I was getting labour pains, and she said, “Not at all; you couldn’t be.” But the pains persisted and began getting worse. I wasn’t on my own; there were other women in the ward. And I told the nurse again, I was still getting the pains and they were getting worse. She said, “Nonsense;” she was quite offhand. So the lady in the bed opposite said, “Did
you
ever have labour pains?” And the nurse said, “No.” “Well, this is this lady’s fifth baby; she should know what labour pains are. If the woman says she’s having labour pains, then she’s having labour pains.” I blessed her for it, because I wouldn’t have shouted or roared in a million years. So a doctor came to examine me, and there was a mad rush.
‘I remember, it was a coloured doctor who delivered him, an African man, I think. And I said to him, “Is she alright?” For some reason, I thought it was a girl. And he said, “It’s not a she; it’s a he.” And he smiled. He was delighted with himself; he was really a happy, very nice man.
‘I was brought up to the ward, but I was on my own. Shane had been left in an incubator. He was only four pounds. And we were told – one of the nurses told me not to hold out too much hope.
‘When I came home, we had to leave Shane there.
We were told that he’d have to stay there, in the incubator, until he gained weight and, again, not to hold out much hope – the same nurse. He was a tiny little thing. And his poor little head used to wobble all over the place. But he was kind of spunky-looking; he’d look you straight in the eye.
*
We went in every day to see him, or every evening. There was a matron who came around, and she asked was this our baby. And I said, “Yes. Do you think he’ll live?” And she said, “Of course he’ll live.” So I said, “The nurse told us not to hold out too much hope.” The matron was absolutely livid; she wanted to know who the nurse was. He was perfectly healthy, just too small.
‘And one morning, we got a card in the post: Please come and collect your son before such and such a time. A postcard – you see, we’d no phone. A plain postcard; it was actually handwritten, come and collect him – like he was a parcel in the post office. So we went in and got him. And I said to the matron, “When do I have to bring him back for a check-up?” She said, “You don’t have to bring him back. He’s perfect.”’
†
*
Train station, on Kilbarrack Road.
†
Rory: ‘We’d all this spare food but no money – until I found a pound, in one of my flannel trousers. I took it out of the case, to hang it up, and the pound note fell out.’
*
Rory: ‘Before the wedding I had to transport my belongings out to Kilbarrack. First on the list was my studio easel. It had to be carried across the city, two buses, and it wasn’t a lightweight object. My next trip was to carry my collection of Walter Scott’s Waverley novels, all of them, in a brown suitcase, a substantial weight, and I was physically exhausted at the end of the trip. However, I read and re-read those books over the years. They now reside in the attic. Like many old classics and favourites, they’re virtually unreadable.’
*
Rory: ‘We used to walk out and look back at it.’
†
Ita: ‘I saw that man again years later, and he remembered me and said, “How’s that baby?” and I think the baby was nearly a teenager by then.’
‡
Rory: ‘Eventually, we got a brand-new road, and two cars a day passed by.’
§
Today the Hamburger Bar, on Kilbarrack Road.
*
Ita: ‘We never had to go further than Desmond Drugan’s. He had cures for everything – cures for bee stings, cures for worms, which nearly all the kids got; he had a cure for them. I remember once, I got fierce chilblains – I think I was expecting – and the itch was an absolute torment. I went down to Desmond Drugan, and he made up this ointment, which I used, and I never got them since. He was a real chemist, an old-style chemist.’
†
Rory: ‘Reading Peter Cheyney and smoking Woodbines.’
*
Rory: ‘I was an enormous distance from home, but that didn’t worry me at all; I had no regrets, no lingering thoughts of wanting to go back to Tallaght. I just transferred my home allegiance to where I was. I never knew the meaning of Northside or Southside; it was a Dublin City thing. I was from County Dublin.’
*
Rory: ‘I was at work, at the
Independent –
it was a Saturday night – when I got a phone call from the nursing home. There was great rejoicing around the place. But, otherwise, I was working; it was the next morning before I saw Ita and the baby.’
*
Ita: ‘Rory came home one day and he told me that some man in work had passed wind in a noisy fashion, and Bob Peffers turned around and said, “Don’t tear it. I’ll take the piece.”’
*
Ita: ‘He still doesn’t.’
†
Dublin maternity hospital.
*
Ita: ‘I can see the difference between then and now; people are maybe right to be more demanding.’
*
Rory: ‘A few years ago, we went to
Lawrence of Arabia
, when it was re-released, and it had been so long since I’d been to the pictures that I was totally unfamiliar with the size of the screen and the volume. When the camels started bawling I leaned forward and looked for the volume button.’
*
Rory: ‘He wasn’t a native of Tallaght. He was a runner-in.’
*
Rory: ‘It was red.’
†
Ita: ‘They can do marvellous things these days, that they might have been able to do something, but, at that time, they couldn’t.’
†
Rory: ‘In latter years, the thought crossed my mind that Windscale [nuclear power station, and plutonium production plant, in Cumbria, UK, on the Irish Sea; renamed ‘Sellafield’ in 1988] might have had something to do with it. But, at that time [1956], we hadn’t heard of Windscale.’
†
Ita: ‘The only thing I remember is Dr Chapman saying, “It’s a boy. That was what she was hoping for.” I can still hear him saying it, but I’d never said that I wanted a boy. We called you Roderick, after your father and your brother. A lot of people said it was bad luck, so I said, “No, it’s in memory of his brother. It keeps the name alive.”’
*
RTE (Radio Telefis Eireann) first broadcast on the 31th of December, 1961.
†
Rory: ‘It was
The Restless Gun.
’
*
Rory: ‘I could only see him through glass; he was in an incubator. And the first time I saw him, I thought, “Mother of God …” But he looked at me, and I came away and said to myself, “He’s going to make it.”’
†
Rory: ‘He was so tiny, he had to be washed in a little pudding bowl; nothing else was small enough to take him. But he made it. I had that feeling, that look about him – he was going to make it.’