Jay continued to stare at her. Trust Helen to come out fighting on his behalf. She knew better than to expect him to do anything she suggested but it was good to know that she’d be there if he needed her. He bent to kiss her cheek.
‘Thanks, honey.’
She frowned. ‘What did I do?’
He took her hand, guided her across the rutted open space to the series of rusty red metal gates where the cattle were held ready for their events. A shout stopped him halfway.
‘Hey, Jay!’
He looked behind him and grinned when he saw Mike Fraser, his rodeo traveling companion, waving at him from the back of his horse. Mike was definitely one of the guys Jay hoped to talk with. Mike’s hair was as black as his boots, his eyes a pale-green that the ladies swooned over.
‘Jay, man, what’s up?’
Jay reached up to grasp Mike’s proffered hand and shook it hard.
‘Nothing much. How’s tricks?’
Mike winked. ‘Not in front of the lady, Jay.’ His gaze slid toward Helen and stayed put. He touched the brim of his hat. ‘Howdy, ma’am.’
Jay took Helen’s hand. ‘Mike’s originally from New York. There are lots of cowboys there, he tells me. We used to travel to the shows together.’
Helen smiled and Mike leant so far out of his saddle that the leather creaked with the strain. ‘Excuse me, ma’am, but you look kind of familiar. Have we met before?’
‘Yes we have. I’m Helen Kinsale. I reset two of your fingers a couple of years ago after you got them caught in your rope.’
Mike laughed. ‘Yeah, I remember now. You did a good job, despite me cussing like a fiend. It sure is nice to see you again, doc.’ He glanced at Jay. ‘Only question I have is, what are you doing hanging around with this old reprobate?’
Helen smiled again. ‘I’m taking care of him, of course.’
‘Lucky guy.’ His paint horse snorted and shifted his feet as if impatient with the conversation. Mike backed him up a few steps. ‘Jay, how about we all meet up for a beer in about an hour? I’ll get you into the riders’ tent, OK?’
‘That would be great.’
Jay watched his old friend ride away before turning to Helen. ‘I forget how many of the guys you already know.’ He hadn’t considered it before but Helen was almost as much part of the rodeo family as he was. No one within the tight-knit community would mind her presence or not want to talk to Jay because she was around. In fact, she might be an asset.
‘I forget, too. At the hospital I’m so busy that I tend to look at the body part I’m treating rather than the person’s face.’ She sighed, her shoulders drooping. Jay put his arm around her and drew her away from the stands. It wasn’t too busy yet. The big crowds would arrive later in the afternoon when the scheduled events got under way. In this relatively quiet time, he wanted to check out the vendors who lined the thoroughfare behind the stands.
Most of the stalls were for ready-made cowboy hats, T-shirts and ornaments he couldn’t see himself buying in a million years. But just behind the cotton candy stall, he spied a leather stall and headed that way. Helen squeezed his hand.
‘Checking out the competition, eh?’
‘I’m hoping I don’t have to hawk my stuff around the rodeo circuit like this. I want to offer something more personal and exclusive to my clients.’
She turned and squinted at him in the sunlight. ‘Have you been talking to your brother?’
He shrugged. ‘Yeah, he gave me a few hints.’
Helen continued to walk, her cowboy boots scuffing up the dust. ‘Good for you. Always helps to ask a professional.’
Inside the booth, they separated. Jay focused on the men’s belts, saddlebags and wallets, while Helen did the same for the ladies’ side. Jay examined the workmanship of a belt, and admired the neat rows of stitching and the clever way the maker had woven in several black and silver beads.
‘It’s one hundred and twenty dollars.’
He looked away from the belt to find the bored-looking teenage stallholder staring at him. Despite the heat, the kid was dressed in black from head to toe. Even his fingernails were painted black to go with his three nose studs.
‘It’s real nice. Do you make them?’
‘My dad does. He’s kind of crazy about getting the details right.’
‘Is he here?’
‘Nope.’
‘Is he going to be here at all today?’
‘Nope.’
Jay felt as frustrated as an interrogator failing to get the necessary details out of a reluctant witness. He tried again.
‘Are you based around here?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Does your dad have a business card?’
For the first time the boy looked vaguely interested. ‘Why would you want that?’
‘So that I can contact him.’
‘But I told you how much the belt was.’
Jay held up his hand. ‘I know. I just want to talk to your . . .’ He sighed and put the belt down. ‘Do you have that business card?’
The guy returned with a slightly grubby square of cardboard. ‘Here you go. He’s not very techno so phoning might be best.’
Jay smiled and retreated to the other side of the stall where Helen was trying not to laugh. He took her hand and walked back into the sunshine.
‘How do you ever get injured kids to tell you what’s wrong with them? It was like extracting milk from a wild cow.’
‘I suppose you get used to interpreting the grunts. Sometimes I ask a parent to translate.’
Jay shuddered. ‘I’m not sure I’d ever want kids. They seem so alien these days.’
Helen looked up at him. ‘Really? I’ve always kind of pictured you with a family.’
He held her gaze, tried to imagine her carrying his child and realized he’d be OK with it. He quickly erased the thought.
‘Nope, not for me.’
Helen looked around. ‘How about something to drink? It’s definitely warming up.’
Grateful for her change of subject, Jay nodded. ‘Yeah, it gets really hot around here. I’ll get a beer. What would you like?’
Helen sipped her lemonade and studied the ever-increasing crowd. Big families complete with babies, grandparents and assorted kids roamed the stands or hung out on the steep grassy banks next to the main arena. In adjoining areas, competitors practiced with their horses or simply rode around getting used to the noise and the new sensations surrounding them. The smell of popcorn made her mouth water and drew her thoughts back to the county fair where she’d first persuaded Cory to kiss her.
Jay’s positive attitude about the rodeo and how he could make use of his contacts to advance his new business had surprised her. Beneath that lazy exterior she glimpsed the hardness and intelligence that had enabled him to leave school at sixteen and still succeed. She could only respect that. He’d made something of himself once and he was going to do it again. As a fellow survivor against the odds, she could only applaud him.
Jay waved at her from the bottom of the stairway and she made her way down to him, carefully avoiding all the kids who were using the steps as a playground.
‘Are you ready to go and meet Mike?’
Helen touched his arm. ‘Do you want me to come? I can go and find something else to do if you like.’
‘I’d like you to come along.’ He held her gaze, his gray eyes steady on hers. ‘You can kick me in the shins if I say anything stupid, OK?’
‘That will be a pleasure.’
He guided her down to the back of the chutes where yet another cowboy, who seemed to know Jay well, let them through. Mike was already seated at a table in the riders’ tent with four other guys. He got to his feet when he saw Jay and Helen.
‘Hey, I found some of the old gang. Come and tell them what you’ve been up to.’
Jay grinned as he pulled out a chair for Helen and then found one for himself.
‘It’s nice to see that nothing’s changed. You’re all still losers.’
Inwardly Helen sighed. Why did guys express their friendship with insults and macho back slapping? How about someone asking how Jay’s leg was healing up instead of making jokes about his pretty face? She smiled when someone handed her a beer and let most of the conversation drift over her.
Someone poked her in the back. ‘Hey, doc, do you remember me?’
She swiveled round in her seat. ‘Show me your left hand.’ She watched him take off his glove and expose the clean lines of his hand and wrist. ‘That healed up pretty well, didn’t it, Justin?’
Her hand was taken in a huge paw and shaken hard. ‘You saved those bones, doc. I never got to say thank you. I couldn’t believe it when Mike said you were here.’
‘Just doing my job.’
Justin grinned. ‘Hey, Jay, good idea getting the doc to follow you round. Are you hoping she’ll stop you getting injured?’
Jay slid an arm around Helen’s shoulders. She could feel the tension in his fingers.
‘Hell, it’s too late for that. I’m done.’
‘Holy crap, Jay.’
Silence fell as all the men sitting at the table contemplated their worst nightmare. Helen glanced at Jay and realized he couldn’t speak.
‘Didn’t Jay tell you that he’s moved on to bigger and better things?’ Helen said.
She caught Mike’s eye in a blatant appeal for help and he sat up straight.
‘Like what, Jay? You’re not training to be a nurse, are you?’
Jay cleared his throat. ‘Nope, I’m setting up as a maker of fancy handmade cowboy boots and leather goods.’
Mike nodded. ‘Yeah, you were always messing around with leather. It sounds like just your thing.’
Justin pointed at the ground. ‘Did you make those?’
Helen moved her chair out of the way as Jay stuck out his legs to reveal his brown and red boots. She held her breath as the guys crowded around him.
‘I like ’em.’ Mike said. ‘They remind me of the old boots my granddad used to wear. Do they feel as good as they look?’
‘Of course they do. Handmade to your size and fit using the traditional slow methods of a real craftsman.’
Justin whistled. ‘Pretty pricy then.’
‘Not for you guys. If you’ll take a chance on me, I’ll keep the costs to the minimum.’
‘My momma told me never to look a gift horse in the mouth.’ Mike stuck out his hand. ‘You can start making a pair for me whenever you’re ready.’
Helen started to relax as Jay directed the conversation into a discussion about what made a boot comfortable and what were everyone’s favorite designs. The rodeo community was relatively small and slow to trust outsiders. Jay’s chances of winning their business were better than most because he truly understood what they needed.
She studied his face as he became more animated and confident. When he started handing out business cards, she knew he’d taken his first step away from the past and toward a new future. A strange desire to cry flooded her. She’d worried that she’d be the one having to leave him, but perhaps it would be the other way round.
Helen gave herself a quick mental shake. That was good, wasn’t it? If both of them moved on, they’d remember their time together with pleasure rather than guilt and acrimony. Jay laughed and his smile warmed her right to her toes. It would be so hard to let him go . . .
‘Jay, I still had some of your rodeo gear loaded in my truck. I left it at the back of the tack room under the main stand.’ Mike stood up and pointed in the general direction of the stand. Jay got up as well, bringing Helen with him.
‘Thanks for hanging on to my stuff, Mike, I appreciate it.’ Jay paused to look down at Helen. ‘Do you think we can get some of it in your car?’
‘It depends what it is. Maybe we’d better go and take a look.’
He took her hand, led her through the competitors and out into the maze of gates, chutes, and livestock behind the stand. The bulls looked remarkably quiet, all huddled together in one enclosure, probably dreaming up new tortures for their unfortunate riders. In contrast, the calves jumped, kicked and hollered like spring lambs.
Helen stopped to look at them. ‘I used to do team calf-roping with my brother.’
‘You have a brother?’
‘As far as I know.’ She kept her gaze on the calves. ‘I think someone would’ve called me if he’d died.’
‘You sure about that?’ Jay asked.
She glared at him. ‘That’s uncalled for. Just because I don’t choose to associate with my family doesn’t mean I’m some kind of uncaring monster.’
His mouth set in a firm line. ‘You should go see them.’
‘Stop telling me what to do!’
He stepped closer until she had to look up to see his face. ‘Shit, Helen, you have a family. Don’t leave it until you get that phone call saying someone’s sick or dying. Go back and see them.’
‘I’ll go back when you go and live with your father.’
He caught her upper arm. ‘I tried that. It didn’t work out. By the time I realized what an asshole he was, my mom was dying and there was nothing I could do but sit by her bedside and hold her hand.’ Abruptly, he set Helen away from him. ‘I have to go get my stuff.’
Turning on his heel, he walked away from her. She watched as he veered to the right, ducked his head and disappeared through a low doorway. She took a steadying breath and followed him. As darkness closed around her, she was surrounded by the scent of leather and wet horse. She slowly inhaled. Vibrations from the stand above her head made the cavelike space tremble and flex like a continuous mini-earthquake.
Jay was at the far end of the cramped space, his back turned toward her. She reached out a tentative hand and touched his arm. ‘Jay . . .’
He turned so suddenly he almost knocked her over.
‘Hell, I’m a fine one to talk. I left my mom for a fucking year because Beau promised he’d help me get into the rodeo business and I was so damned selfish, I wanted to believe him. While I got the best of everything, he cut off my mom’s money and ignored her pleas for help.’
Helen swallowed hard against the pain in his eyes. ‘But you went back. You realized he didn’t have the power to give you what you really wanted, didn’t you?’