Read Ronan: Ziva Payvan Book 3 Online
Authors: EJ Fisch
The view through the window in the director’s office looked different at night, in Aroska’s opinion. It wasn’t just because he had a clear view of the swath of destruction the
Vigilance
had left in its wake. The portion of the city visible through the glass just seemed dead now, but maybe that was simply because he himself felt dead. He’d already come to understand Ziva’s concerns about attachment after Maston’s death, and the lesson wasn’t any easier to learn the second time around.
He had to remind himself that he was only standing there because Ziva had given herself up. If she’d run away like he’d wanted her to, the Federation might already be there knocking down their doors, ready to tear apart their lives until they found her. He might have been fine with sacrificing his own freedom so she could escape, but Fed presence would affect all of Haphez, just like she’d said. She’d saved their whole civilization from this immediate threat, and by sending off that data, she may have even saved the whole galaxy.
Periodic sighs or faint shuffling of feet were the only ways he knew Skeet and Zinni were still present in the office. Emeri had summoned them all there but had been called away again to deal with the ongoing efforts to clean up the agency campus and get the wreck of the
Vigilance
moved. They’d been waiting in silence for at least ten minutes.
That silence was finally broken by Skeet’s low voice. “She knew it was going to blow.”
Aroska turned and found him sitting in one of the chairs across from Emeri’s desk, hands folded in his lap, staring down at the floor. “You think so?”
“She checked that damage out – she wasn’t lying about that – but I saw her face. She knew good and well how severe it was.”
“It was a suicide run, then,” Zinni murmured.
Skeet nodded to himself. “She knew she’d be dead if she turned herself in, but she knew we’d be dead if she made a run for it.”
Aroska pondered this for a moment. Agreeing to go with Matney had successfully alleviated any hostility the Federation might hold toward Haphez, so in a sense she’d saved them all just by getting on that ship. But piloting the doomed vessel had been her way of saving herself; she wouldn’t have to endure execution, imprisonment, or spend the rest of her life looking over her shoulder after somehow escaping custody. The idea simultaneously brought him comfort and made him furious. Damn it, they could have helped her figure something out if she’d just let them. But at the same time…
Zinni summed up his thoughts perfectly. “She went out on her own terms.”
“That she did.”
The new voice drew their attention to the door, where Emeri was entering with three data pads in hand. “And in that sense, I believe we should be happy for her. After everything she accomplished, she didn’t deserve to die at the hands of the Federation, but I wasn’t about to tell
them
that.”
He continued across the room and handed them each one of the pads. “She drafted personal recommendations for each of you – we received them this morning. None of you are going anywhere for a while.”
Aroska took the device and looked it over, recalling the one Ziva had been holding that morning. The opportunity to stay in spec ops was a bit of a silver lining in these unpleasant circumstances, though he wasn’t sure how much he liked the thought of doing it without her.
“She must have transmitted them just seconds before the explosion,” Emeri said. “Perhaps that’s why she was so agitated when you contacted her. I believe there’s a personal note for each of you as well.”
The thought of Ziva sitting there composing personalized messages seemed absurd, but when Aroska flipped to the next file on the pad, sure enough, there it was. He sat down to read it.
Tarbic—
You told me you would stay in spec ops if you were given the chance, so here it is. You’re a good agent, and I think you’ll do fine. Just remember I won’t be there to pull your ass out of the fire anymore. Skeet and Zinni have your back and will do whatever they can to help you. Listen to Skeet and learn from him – he’s a good leader. Not very many people get an opportunity like this, so don’t screw up. No pressure though.
I meant it when I said I was glad you took me up to the hill the other night. I’m sorry for everything I put you through. You were right; I probably should have just told you the truth at the beginning. Might have saved us a few bruises and hard feelings, right? Sometimes I still can’t believe I actually told you everything. You’re one of the few people who gets under my skin, and I kind of hate you for that…but thanks.
Take care of yourself, Aroska. It’s been real.
He tried to fight the smile he felt tugging at the corners of his mouth, but the effort was futile. It was fascinating how she could be so candid but still so…
Ziva
. He realized he wouldn’t have it any other way.
His eyes were drawn back to the final line of the note as his mind conjured up two separate memories. Hadn’t he said those exact words to her as he’d left the med center after she’d been shot? He was fairly certain she was just quoting him – she’d been doing that a lot lately, it seemed. But another quote came to mind, something he’d said in the café in Salex:
I guess I just don’t know what’s real anymore
.
There was hardly time to ponder what she’d meant, however, when he caught sight of the timestamp at the bottom of the screen. He hadn’t really even been looking at it – he’d just been staring at that particular spot while lost in thought. But now that he saw it, he couldn’t take his eyes off of it. Surely it had to be a mistake. No, all the planet’s time-keeping devices and comm logs were controlled by a central computer in Haphor. All Haphezian timepieces were perfectly synchronized.
But there it was. It should have been impossible, but if it meant what Aroska thought it meant, the time for grieving was over.
10.08
.
He smiled.
Initializing…
10.01.0036
ACTIVITY LOG
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