Right Girl (2 page)

Chapter Three

Zack
and I have a later dinner and decide to take a walk amongst the picturesque
gardens. We then take a seat at one of the tables outside and sit opposite one
another. It’s similar to the one we sat at the first night we came here all
those months ago and I can’t help the rush of memories which threaten to
consume me.

“Samantha,
what’s wrong?” He demands, watching me intently.

“There’s
nothing wrong.” I lie, trying to avoid his penetrative gaze. “I’m fine.”

“Please
don’t lie to me.” He commands firmly, leaning forward in his seat. “Something
has been troubling you all day.”

“Can
we discuss this later?” I beg him. “Please?”

“No,
let’s discuss this now. I want to know what’s bothering you and you’re going to
tell me.”

I
sigh deeply, frustrated that he won’t let this go. I just know he’s going to go
on at me until I break down and reveal everything to him.

“Zack,
you don’t know what you’re asking of me.”

“I
just want you to be honest with me, ok? Tell me what’s wrong.”

He’s
extremely persistent and almost confrontational. It’s as though he’s
challenging me and the thought of that is somewhat intimidating.

“I
didn’t want it to come out like this.”

“Sweetheart,
just tell me.” He says, speaking softly.

The
antagonistic edge to his voice has disappeared, replaced by the familiar tone
I’ve become used to. It weakens my resolve and moisten my lips, trying to
prepare myself for the next part of this.

“You’re
a father, Zack.”

He
inhales sharply, freezing right in front of me. Neither one of us says anything
as I begin to tremble, awaiting his response with so much fear.

“What
did you say?”

“Y-you
have a child.” I stammer, clearing my throat which feels like it’s now closing
up.

“Y-you
mean…?”

“Yes.”
I assure him, staring at him when he starts to shake his head in disbelief.

“You
mean you’re really pregnant?” He whispers, sounding incredulous as well as
hopeful.

“No,
you don’t understand.” I interrupt him hastily. “You’ve got it all wrong.”

“What
do you mean? You just said I’m going to be a dad.” He points out, sounding
confused and a little angry with me.

“I
said you’re a dad already.” I remind him, making sure he understands what I’m
trying to tell him.

“So…
you’re
not
pregnant?” He asks, raising his eyebrows up at me.

“No,
I’m not pregnant.” I confirm, trying to ignore the disappointment on his face.

“Then
what do you mean?”

“I
saw Rachel today. I saw her this afternoon and she had a baby with her,
your
baby.”

I
watch him closely, wondering how he’s going to react to my confession.

“What
the fuck are you talking about?!” He yells, jumping up onto his feet.

The
chair he was sitting on falls over, capturing the attention of a few people
nearby.

“She
didn’t have an abortion, Zack. She lied to you about that.”

He
starts pacing back and forth, raking his fingers through his hair as his
agitation increases.

“I
don’t believe this… I
won’t
believe this.” He murmurs, refusing to stand
still in front of me. “There’s no way she would do something like that and not
tell me about it.”

“I
think you should speak with her about why she did that but I know what I saw.
You have a baby girl and she’s beautiful.”

He
stops, whirling around to face me as his mouth falls open in shock.

“A
girl?”

“She
looks just like you.” I tell him. “She has to be yours.”

“How
old is she?”

“A
couple of months or so.”

“This
is really fucked up.” He groans, closing his eyes for several seconds. “This
can’t be happening.”

“There’s…
there’s something else.” I add, knowing I need to divulge everything before
it’s too late.

“What
is it?”

“Rachel
was with someone when I saw her today, someone I didn’t think I’d see again.”

“Who
was it?” He snaps. “Your mum?”

“No,
it was Harry.”

It
takes Zack a few moments to process what I just told him. I’ve disclosed so
much in such a short space of time, I just don’t know how he’s going to handle
everything.

“Your
uncle who…?”

“Yes.”
I murmur, lowering my gaze towards the ground beneath my feat. “My uncle who
abused me as a child. I guess Rachel’s come around to the idea of him being her
dad because that’s what she called him right in front of me. They were out shopping
together which makes it obvious that my sister believes my mum over me. She
told Rachel I was lying about what harry did to me all those years ago and
she’s somehow managed to fool her.”

“Are
you trying to tell me that the sick pervert who hurt you is close by?” Zack
whispers, struggling to control his rage and disgust.

“Yes.”

“Which
means he’s around my daughter?”

“I
guess so.” I agree, nodding my head slowly.

“Jesus
Christ, I’m going to kill him!” Zack roars, slamming his fists against the
table’s surface in front of him.

He
storms off before I can stop him, shoving people aside as he makes his way
towards the main exit of the hotel.

“Zack,
wait! Please, Zack!” I cry, chasing after him.

“Don’t
touch me, Samantha. I’m not responsible for who I hurt right now and I don’t
want to lash out at you by mistake.”

I
ignore his warning and grab hold of his arm, pleading with him to turn around
and stop what he’s doing.

“We
can talk about this, ok? Let’s go upstairs and discuss what we do next.” I beg
him, forcing him to stop and acknowledge me.

“The
only thing I plan on doing right now is finding that evil monster. I’m going to
tear him apart and there’s nothing you can do about it. You think I can just ignore
the fact that he came near you today? You think I’m actually going to walk away
and let him get away with what he did to you as a child? Samantha, I can’t have
him anywhere near my daughter. I
have
to make sure he can’t hurt her.”

“She’s
his grandchild.” I say, trying my best to calm him. “He wouldn’t hurt her.”

“And
you’re his niece.” He murmurs, closing the narrow space between us. “And he
still hurt you.”

I
realise he’s right and cover my face with my hands. The thought of Harry
hurting another human being is unthinkable and I can’t help but feel
responsible for it.

“What
are we going to do?” I ask, looking up at him for answers.

“Come
with me.” Zack commands, taking hold of my small hand in his. “We’re leaving right
now and I’m going to go and get her.”

“Amber?”
I blurt out, forgetting that Zack doesn’t even know what she’s called yet.

“Is
that her name?”

“That’s
what Rachel said.”

“I
can’t believe you’ve known about this all day and didn’t say anything to me.
How could you lie to me like that?”

“I
didn’t know how to tell you!” I sob, shoving my hands against his chest so I
can push him away. “I was absolutely terrified and I just freaked out.”

“Did
you tell Audrey?”

“I
had to tell her. She could see how upset I was when I arrived at the café.” I
explain, folding my arms across my chest.

“You
should have told
me
.” He points out, grabbing hold of my wrists so he
can pull me back towards him.

“Fuck
you, Zack. Stay the hell away from me.”

I
break free from his grasp and run away from him, racing up the stairs so I can
reach our hotel room.

“Where
do you think you’re going?!” He shouts after me, trying to block my path.

“Back
upstairs so I can get my things.”

“Good.
We’re leaving in five minutes.”

“You’re
seriously deluded if you think I’m going anywhere with you.” I retort sharply,
sounding cold and detached.

“Samantha,
I’m not letting you out of my sight. I’m not leaving you alone when I know he’s
out there.”

“Go
and find your baby, Zack. That’s all you’re really bothered about.”

He
inhales sharply, stunned by my surprisingly spiteful comment. I know it was
uncalled for but I couldn’t stop myself. The envy I’m consumed by has taken
over, controlling what I say and how venomous my voice sounds now when I
converse with him.

“How
can you say that to me?” He asks, breathing heavily. “You think I would
actually stop caring for you because I’ve found out I have a child?”

He
places himself in front of me so I can’t enter our hotel room, forcing me to
make eye contact with him when I don’t want to.

“Nothing
compares to the love that you will soon have for that baby.” I inform him,
speaking clearly. “
Believe me
, I know.”

Silence
falls between us and I exhale slowly. Zack reaches out for me once more but I
pull back, desperate to remain strong by myself.

“I’m
so sorry.” He murmurs, watching me intently. “I… I wasn’t thinking about you or
how you must be feeling when I said all of those things.”

We
both know he’s referring to the abortion I had when I was eighteen. The one
which haunted me for so many years and the true reason behind my reluctance to
have children. The terror which consumed me back then still looms over me, a
constant fear which controls the terror I still have about falling pregnant
again.

“Just
go.” I implore him, closing my eyes so I can’t witness his heartbreak when I
tell him this. “Go and see Rachel so you can find out the truth. I need to be
alone.”

“I’m
not leaving you.” He replies, defiance glaring back at me.

“I’ll
wait for you. I’ll wait here so you know I’m safe.” I assure him, trying my
best to sound convincing.

“But
I want you to come with me.” He says, lowering his head. “I
need
you by
my side when I face this because I can’t do this without you.”

“Rachel
won’t speak to you if I’m there.” I explain, needing him to realise why he must
do this alone. “You need to do this by yourself.”

“Then
I won’t go. I don’t need to find out anything.”

He
shrugs as though it’s no big deal, eager to persuade me he can go through with
this.

“Zack,
she’s your child. You owe it to yourself to find out the truth.”

“If
she
is
my baby… we can still make this work. This is something we can
fix, right? We’re going to be ok, aren’t we?”

The
desperation in his voice almost causes me to break down. Unshed tears which
have built up start to fall and I wipe one away before Zack can notice.

“I
won’t make you any promises I can’t keep.” I reply sombrely, remaining detached
when I announce this.

“You
can’t leave me. I won’t
let
you leave.”

He
takes one step forward, forcing
me
to take one back. I’m pressed against
the wall behind me, struggling to free myself from his confinement.

“Zack,
I need to be alone and you need to find Rachel.” I advise him, placing my hands
against his chest so I can keep him back. “I presume she’ll be staying with my
mum so you can always start there.”

“How
am I supposed to walk out of here without you?”

“You
can do it. You
have
to.”

“Promise
me you will still be here when I get back?
Promise
me, Samantha?”

I
meet his gaze and try to ignore the frustration in his eyes, challenging me to
make him this vow.

“I’ll
be here.”

“You
mean it?” He asks me, lowering his lips towards mine.

He’s
still doubtful and know he needs my reassurance, craving the comfort of my
touch more than ever.

“I
mean it because I love you.” I soothe him, needing Zack to know how sincere I
am.

He
grazes his lips against my own, accelerating my heartrate within seconds. Zack
smiles weakly, stroking his finger down the side of my face before he leaves.
I’m about to enter our hotel room when he stops me, calling out to me from
halfway down the corridor.

“One
day it will be us… I promise you.”

I
watch him turn the corner and disappear, relieved that he won’t be able to hear
my response to something he’s so certain about.

“I
doubt that.” I whisper, entering our hotel room with a weary heart. “I doubt
that very much.”