Ride The Wild Wind (Time Travel Historical Romance) (32 page)

 She watched a nerve in his jaw twitch. “Leave my son alone. He has
suffered enough without being constantly reminded of his loss. Besides, you
have no say in my child’s life.You are not his mother.”

           
Despite the frigid temperature, heat suffused her cheeks. No, she wasn’t
Lukachukai’s mother, but she knew the child needed healing. “You know what,
Antonio? Because of your stubborn pride, Lukachukai is going to be the real
loser in your stupid game of hero
.
While you’re off fighting your lost
causes, trying to save the world from monsters, your child is the one who will
ultimately suffer. He’s going be a little boy who lost not only his baby
sister, but both his parents. He’ll never get that prosthetic hand you were
sketching, and you’ll be to blame for his lifetime of misery. This is your
moment in time to do great things, but you’re going about it all wrong.”

 “I will be gone a day and a night. Go back to camp and look after
the children in my absence.”

She would never understand him. A moment ago he’d pointed out she wasn’t
their mother, yet he always entrusted them into their care. Not that she
wouldn’t care for the children anyway.  She loved them as if they were her
own flesh and blood. As Stella said, they were her family now.  “Where are
you going?”

He didn’t answer, but only turned and walked away without ever looking
back.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

A month had passed since her rescue from Fort Dennison and still Antonio
barely acknowledged her existence.  He hadn’t yet moved out of their
shared hogan, but he barely looked at her now, let alone engaged in
conversation. Sex was also nonexistent. They hadn’t made love since the morning
she told him she had come from the future. But why should his behavior surprise
her? He probably thought she was insane, that her looniness might rub off.

Halle’d learned that simply cohabitating with Antonio didn’t mean they
were married according to Navajo custom. While she realized the
elders—particularly her adoptive parents frowned upon this behavior—Sonny told
her that a wider latitude was extended to Antonio since he was only half
Navajo, and had acquired “white man” customs while away from The People.

 Not that she cared if anyone thought less of her. Absolutely
nothing was happening between them. When Antonio bedded down beside her at
night, he always placed his back to her. They never spoke, never touched. She
knew he needed her, that it was hell for them both lying so close and not
making love. Her imagination began to take over and she imagined he might have
taken another lover, perhaps one who appeared saner and didn’t talk about
having visions of the future.

Stella also had deserted her in her time of need. She’d tried summoning
her again to see if there was a grace period and she and Max could still opt
for a trip back to the future, but it appeared her spirit guide was on vacation
or plain ignoring her. She wondered if there was a complaint department for
derelict spirit guides.

Lukachukai,
who’d fallen in love with Max
,
had come to
live with them. Tani visited everyday and it seemed she was her only friend now,
other than Max. 

 One day Antonio surprised them all in the middle of the afternoon
while Tani and the boys were getting their hair spiked and colored. By Halle’s
estimation it was late October, and she explained the custom of trick or
treating to Tani
,
Diego and Lukachukai. Well, most of it anyway. Aware
of the Navajo’s fear of ghosts and the death taboo, she’d purposely omitted
that
part about Halloween and concentrated instead on costumes. The children
spread the word throughout camp and tonight, children and adults alike would go
hogan
to hogan
in search of goodies
.

The camp was bustling with activity as people scrambled to sew last
minute costumes and prepare special treats. For the occasion, Halle’d
temporarily dyed and spiked Tani and Lukachukai’s hair in a luscious shade of
fuschia. She’d also snipped months of red outgrowth from her own hair and
scrunched the short dark layers with shiny agave cactus gel, twisting it into a
chic, but messy style. She and Tani fashioned a Max a long wig from horsehair.
For Halloween, they were dressing as the punk rock band, The Casualties.

Antonio lifted the woven door covering, interrupting their costuming
session. He froze. “What is going on?”

Halle deftly touched a short, stiff spike on her cropped hair. “Like my
new ’do? We’re going trick or treating tonight. We’re The Casualties.”

He stared opened mouthed at her a moment, shock etched clearly on his
face. “You cut your hair.”

 “Just the red parts. Like it?”

“No.”

She wrinkled her nose. “I should have known you’d have this reaction”

His gaze fell upon Diego and he grimaced.

“We’re going as a punk rock band,” Halle added for clarification,
knowing fully well the meaning would be lost on the nineteenth century man.
“You know. Spiked hair, loud music,  anarchy and all that jazz.” She waved
him off. “Never mind.”

His eyes swung to Tani’s tall spiked colored locks.  Halle saw him
flinch. “What the—”

Halle moved next to Tani
,
who simply stared at the ground. “I
thought a few spikes on the top of Tani’s head would add some height to her
petite frame,” she offered, touching them to test their stiffness. “Cool, isn’t
it? I never knew you could make sculpting gel from cactus snot.”

Antonio muttered an expletive—a crude word she’d never heard him use.
His jaw clenched. His hands balled into fists, then relaxed. “Both of you ...”
His voice remained eerily calm as his gaze darted back and forth between Tani
and Halle. “Wash your hair, Tani.”

Lukachukai sprang from a darkened corner. “I’m a Casualty! ” He danced
around, laughing with the bewigged Max in his arms.

Antonio stared, open mouthed. Everyone did.

Lukachukai had spoken
.

“
Shiye?
” Antonio took a step toward Lukachukai, then froze. So
did the boy. Man and child only stared at one another.

 “What has happened to these children?” His gaze slowly swung to
Max. “The dog, too?”

Halle, in her effort to suppress a laugh snorted instead.

A giggle escaped Tani. “Is Max not the funniest thing you have ever
seen?”

“Have you all gone mad? My niece looks like a...a peacock and….” He
shoved a hand through his long tousled locks. “I don’t know what in the hell my
son looks like but I do
not
approve.”

Halle rolled her eyes. She should have known he wouldn’t like it.
“Relax, Antonio. These are costumes for Halloween night. The hair color is
temporary.”

Diego,
always the shy one, slunk into the shadows.

“We’re going trick or treating,” she explained. “Everyone in camp is
dressing up for the occasion—everyone except old fuddy-duddy you. Haven’t you
noticed all the excitement?”

Hallie watched sweat bead across Antonio’s brow. His nostril’s flared. A
nerve in his jaw twitched. He turned toward Tani. “Take Lukachukai to the creek
and wash the dye from his hair. Now.”

 At his order, Tani grasped the boy’s hand and left with Diego and
Max on their heels.

Antonio bent and rummaged through some leather saddlebags. Then he began
to place a few belongings inside. He was leaving again?

“Thanks, Antonio. You’ve just ruined the children’s evening.” He ignored
her. Hands on hips, she stood over him. “Okay, mister, don’t you think the
silent treatment has gone on long enough?”

He rose to tower over her and she felt the biting nip of air. Was it
him, or the chill of late afternoon?

“I don’t know who you are. What more do you expect me to say. I have
been living with a stranger all these months.”

He’d
been living with a stranger? For a man who had more than a
few dark secrets of his own, he certainly had some nerve passing judgment. “I
would have told you sooner but I didn’t think you’d believe me. Besides, you
haven’t exactly been honest with me, either.”

“You know everything—thanks to Tani.” He pulled a leather pouch from a
peg on the wall slung it over his shoulder. “What else is there to add?”

He stared at her for the longest time, hesitating, as if there was more
he longed to say, but was afraid. “I have known for sometime you are different,
Halle. The way you speak…the things you know about The People. Sonny saw you in
a vision months before I found you. Lukachukai dreamed of you, as did I.”

Hope flared within. “Then you believe I’m not crazy? That I did come
from the future…that I saw you on the road that night of the storm?”

“I believe you arrived into my world that night, but I am still not
certain how that is possible. I cannot even fathom who or
what
you are.”

Halle lifted a hand to touch his face, then withdrew, sensing it would
do no good. “I’m flesh and blood like you.”

He shook his head. “No. You are much more.”

She watched him move about the hogan, gathering a few tools—a knife,
rope and a few cooking implements. What did he mean, she was ‘much more’? Did
he think she possessed supernatural powers?

“Are you angry with me?”

He didn’t answer.

“Are you afraid?”

His eyes lifted to hers. “I have no fear of you. I fear
for
you.”

Her heart squeezed in her chest and she knelt beside him. “I didn’t tell
you sooner because I was afraid you’d think I was crazy.”

At her words, his harsh expression softened. “From the first moment I found
you, unconscious and lying in the arroyo, I knew you were not ordinary.”

He rose and brushed past as if their conversation was over.

“Wait! Is that all you have to say?” Standing, Halle put her hands on
her hips. He glanced at her, then returned to packing. “You never answered my
question, Antonio. Where are you going?”

“That is of no concern to you.”

“Please tell me you’re not going to a raid a fort again.”

“Rest assured I am not. Such is too risky now.”

“Are you meeting with an arms supplier?”

“I asked that you not concern yourself in my affairs, Halle. You should
not be involved in any of this.” Opening the canvas bag side, he tossed in a
coil of rope, a small hatchet and some jerked meat, then turned to look at her.
“I also feel it is in your best interest that we don’t share a hogan
any
longer. We are not properly married and my family has expressed their
disapproval of our living arrangements. I will move my things out when I return
from my trip. Lukachukai’s as well.”

The ground moved beneath her feet and she steadied herself with one hand
on the wall. He was abandoning her?  Oh, God. Just as she’d always feared.
One day he’d tire of her and leave. Like everyone else in her life. Tears
bubbled up, but she fought them back.  “I thought your family was all
right with the idea of us living together. Tani said since you’d spent much of
your life among the whites, they understood your ways were different.”

“My ‘ways’ are disrespectful.” His lips pressed together and he looked
away. “Besides, it is clear that you don’t wish to remain here with me.
Therefore, I will not marry you, Halle and force you to live with The People.
Neither will I continue to risk the possibility of getting you with child.”

His verbal slap stung worse than if he’d actually struck her. She wished
she had something to clunk this pig headed lout with over the head! “You hate
me.”

“I certainly do not.”

“All because I didn’t tell you who I really was or why I’d come? But you
wouldn’t have understood.”

He turned, his dark gaze meeting hers. “Are you so certain?”

“My story is insane.”

“Yes, and I still cannot believe it,” he said as he stood. “Traveling
back in time...riding on wagons without horses…”

“Cars,” she interjected.

“Guides named Sally.”

“Stella.”

He shrugged. “I would rather believe you were ill, that your captivity
by soldiers impaired your ability to reason. But in my heart I know you are not
sick and what you said is true.”

“You do?”

He nodded.

“Then if you know I’m telling the truth why don’t you trust me when I
tell you we must get the children to Albuquerque?”

“There is nothing left for us there.”

“I asked you to trust me on this one.”

He scoffed. “Considering your poor judgment where Frank Cole was
concerned, perhaps that is too much to ask. You will dismiss any notions of
ever returning to Albuquerque, Halle. I forbid further talk on the matter.”

“What am I to do? Stay here like a sitting duck and wait until the
soldiers arrive?”

“When I return, I will decide where to send you. Since you don’t wish to
remain with me in the encampment, then I will release you, Halle. You will be
free to return to your former life—but
not
to Elena Costanza’s.”

She bit down on her lower lip to keep from bawling like a baby as she
watched him leave, feeling as empty as the wide vast canyon lands surrounding
them. Damn him! It wasn’t her freedom she wanted. It was him!

She couldn’t let him go—not yet with so many words left unspoken between
them. She followed him to the door. “Antonio, are you really not coming back to
live in our hogan?”

He paused but did not turn around. “No. I am not coming back to live
with you.”

Her legs almost collapsed from beneath her as numbness settled into her
extremities. It was over. Truly over.  The hopelessness of her situation
hit her full force. She’d given up everything for Antonio, had probably wasted
her only chance to return to the future because she’d been stupid enough to
fall in love with him. Now this mule headed man had the audacity to brush her
aside as if these past few months meant nothing? Men were nothing but self
serving pigs and the women who were stupid enough to love them were the biggest
fools of all!

“Pack your belongings, Halle. I will return in a few days, and at that
time decide on a safe destination for you.”

Then, he was gone.

Tears blinded her and she dashed them away with her hands. What a
screwed up wreck her life had become. All because she trusted her heart and not
her intellect. Never again would she make that same mistake. If Antonio loved
her—truly loved her—he’d never abandon her. He’d remain in their hogan and
they’d work through their differences despite what his Navajo family thought.
Yet he was all too eager to discard her. Why? Had he found another woman? Or
was it true what she always believed? She was so screwed up no one could ever
love her?

 She glanced around the hogan at the sand drawings Lukachukai made
for her today, and the combs and pots of colored gel she’d styled the
children’s hair with. Maybe it all hadn’t been in vain. Antonio might not love her
the way she needed but at least she had the children—their loyalty. As Stella
once said, these kids were her family now, and they were in mortal danger. Even
the tiny bud of new life growing inside her deserved protection.

Hadn’t her mother made the ultimate sacrifice years ago by having her
aunt hide her in the foster care system? More tears welled up in her eyes and
she fought them down. Sacrifice. That’s what love was really all about. She
knew that now. Even so, it didn’t fill the emptiness in her heart for a man
whose love she could never possess.