Revelation of Hearts (Stacey and Shane Mcleod, #3) (42 page)

Shane arrived home around four o’clock. Nicky was in his playpen and the twins were playing at the kitchen table. Stacey was preparing supper so they could eat early and she would have a chance to talk to Shane about going ho.., to Texas early.

After supper and the kids were bathed and in bed, Stacey brought Shane a cup of tea and sat down with him. “Shane, I want to take the kids and go to Texas next month. I know you have a two week holiday coming up in July, but I thought it would be nice to spend more than just two weeks on the ranch.”

Stacey could tell by the expression on Shane’s face that he wasn’t receptive to the idea, then he asked, “Is this a fait accompli; or are we discussing it first?”

“I’m trying to discuss it with you now. If you have objections tell me what they are and why.”

“To begin with, there is no way you can handle three little ones on a seven to eight hour flight, or have you already asked your aunt and Richard.”

“That’s unfair, Shane. I just told you I was discussing it with you now. I was thinking, if we travel at night the kids would sleep most of the way. You will come out in July and help me back with them.”

“Be honest with me Stacey, is this your way of punishing me for the life I led before we met? If so, I forbid you to leave until I’m free to travel with you. These are my children too and I want them kept safe.”

“Forbid? You, said forbid? I don’t think I like that word. I’m your wife Shane, not your child, and I resent you inferring I would ever jeopardize our children’s welfare.”

“I’m quite aware of that Stacey. Forbid was a bad choice of words. What I’m trying to get across to you is, I’m concerned with you traveling all that way with three very young children.”

Stacey sat watching her husband, wondering what had brought on this argumentative side of him. He had almost always been a placid, unassuming, sweet man. Shane’s accusations and him forbidding her anything, didn’t sit well with her; she remembered how in Scotland he had tried to forbid her to travel to Hawick.  Shane watched Stacey as she walked to the French doors and looked out into the darkness. When she turned back, he saw hurt and anger in her eyes. “I think you may have mistaken me for someone else, Shane,” Stacey informed him. “To use the word ‘forbid,’ with me is tantamount to spitting in the wind and I do take umbrage. I will advise you of what I decide to do.” Stacey said as she picked up the cups and took them to the kitchen.

Shane followed her to the kitchen and said, “Sweetheart, I don’t want you angry with me and I’m not undervaluing your ability, but you know it would be stressful with one child, much less with three. I love you Stacey, please don’t be angry with me.” Shane opened his arms and as always; Stacey walked into the comfort of them.

After making love, Shane held Stacey in his arms thinking. He knew Stacey was right about the ranch and the children would benefit from the freedom the ranch offered. Shane knew he had to talk to someone and sort out his irrational fears that someday the ranch would lure Stacey back. He decided to talk with his dad since they would be flying up to Edinburgh over the weekend.

The twins loved flying and Nicky sat kicking his feet in his car seat. Shane took turns letting the girls look out the window of the plane. Stacey had been a little withdrawn since the night of their argument. When they arrived in Edinburgh, Andrew and Elizabeth were there to meet them. The twins ran to greet their grandparents in the terminal. After hugs and kisses, they spent the night at Shane’s parents and the next day drove to Grandmother McLeod’s. 

After lunch, Shane and Andrew went to play golf. During the game, they talked around the problem. In the clubhouse, Shane opened up to his dad. “I hate to admit it Dad, but I have been irascible of late. I tried reparation, but I’m not so sure I have been forgiven. I have kept parts of my former life from Stacey, but as secrets often do, they came to the light of day.”

“I find it hard to believe that Stacey wouldn’t forgive you for almost anything except being unfaithful. You haven’t been have you son?”

Shane was appalled that his father would question such a thing, “Absolutely not, Dad. I love Stacey. It is as I said, Stacey inadvertently learned about things that I had chosen not to tell her. Out of my own guilt, I was unfair to her. I sense her pulling away from me and I don’t know how to stop it. Now she wants to take the children and go to the ranch for a few weeks. To tell the truth, I wasn’t too receptive to the trip at this time and logic told me there was no way she could handle three little ones for hours on an airplane. To make matters worse, I forbade her to go.”

The last thing Shane expected was for his father to chortle a hardy laugh and then said, “So you forbid Stacey to go. I’m sure that went over like a lead balloon. Have you talked to Lora and Richard about them helping her with the little ones?”

“No, I haven’t, but I did accuse Stacey of plotting with them before I was informed.”

“I would wager, Stacey had plenty too say about that,” Andrew said with a smile on his face.

“Right you are, she told me in no uncertain terms, that forbidding her anything was tantamount to spitting in the wind.” Once again, Shane heard amused laughter from his father.

Back at Grandmother McLeod’s, Stacey was playing with the children in the back garden. Elizabeth brought out lemonade for everyone. The girls had theirs in their sippy cups and Nicky had juice in his.

Grandmother McLeod, had been watching Stacey with the children. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but she sensed something was bothering Stacey. In a while, the children showed signs of needing their nap. As Stacey and Elizabeth started to take them inside, Grandmother McLeod said, “Stacey, stay and keep me company. Let Elizabeth be a doting grandmother for a while.”  Stacey smiled and came to sit beside her. “Are you going to tell me what is bothering you or must I drag it out of you, child.”

Stacey hugged Grandmother McLeod and said, “Shane and I are in disagreement over my wanting to take the kids to the ranch a few weeks early. He feels I might not be able to handle three little ones on such a long flight. He is adamant, so much so, he forbade me to take them until he was free to go too.”

“So, when are you and the children leaving?” Grandmother McLeod asked, with a knowing smile.

“I’m not sure, Shane is right about it being a long trip for the kids. I reasoned, if we traveled at night they would sleep most of the way. I haven’t formed my plan yet, but the kids and I are going with or without Shane’s approval.”

Grandmother McLeod watched Stacey closely. “What else is bothering you darling?”

Stacey stood up and crossed her arms. “It’s a silly thing, I met Doctor Portman a few days ago. I was upset that Shane had not told me the truth about their friendship. Hugh told Annie, but Shane thought I was too young, too naïve or too something to know.”

“Stacey, darling, Shane is only trying to protect your sensibilities. You were young when you married, but keep in mind, Shane was a man full grown with experience.”

On the flight to London, Stacey thought about what Grandmother McLeod had told her. Maybe she was being unfair to Shane. She would try to be more understanding, however, she still intended to go to the ranch as soon as possible. Whatever she was yearning for was there.

She loved Shane, there was no doubt about that. Maybe it was the freedom to ride in the wide-open spaces with the Texas wind blowing in your face or the smell of home. The London parks were nice but she felt a great need to get out of the city.

Shane and Doctor Fein had just finished a surgery and were taking a coffee break. Shane told Doctor Fein he might need a day or two off to escort Stacey and the children to Texas.

“When will you need this time off?” Doctor Fein asked.

“Not until after the seventh of the month. The twins are having a party for their second birthday.”

Doctor Fein smiled at Shane and asked, “Are Molly and I invited to this momentous occasion?”

Shane chortled and said, “Of course, you are, if you fancy spending an afternoon with a pack of sticky, ice cream laden toddlers.”

Doctor Fein gave Shane a dubious smile and said, “Molly will love every minute of it, she misses her grandchildren enormously. As a matter of fact, talk to Stacey about having the party at Oxford house. The garden is full of swings, slides and a carousel. Leftovers from Deborah’s children.”

After supper; and the children were all tucked in bed, Shane broached Stacey about having the birthday party at Oxford house. He also told her that he had mentioned he might need a couple of days off to help her travel to Texas with the children. Stacey watched the expressions on Shane’s face as he related his conversation with Doctor Fein.

As hard as Shane was trying to accept the inevitable, Stacey knew he had misgivings about the trip. She didn’t like being at odds with Shane, but she had very strong feelings about taking the children and getting away from the city for a while. Last summer had been a nightmare with the subway bombings and Jennifer’s death. Hoping to make Shane feel better, she agreed to have the twin’s birthday party at Oxford house.

When Stacey told her aunt about the change in plans she saw a flicker of displeasure cross her aunt’s face and asked, “Aunt Lora, is there some reason you would rather we not have the party at Oxford house. It’s not chiseled in stone, we can always go back to the park.”

“No, darling, Oxford house will be fine. It’s very nice of Doctor and Mrs. Fein to offer to have the party there.” Stacey frowned knowing something was troubling her aunt. Lora noticed Stacey’s discomfort and said, “The reason I hesitated is that Richard and Molly were close friends after Molly’s husband died in a plane crash. Actually, they were more than just friends.”

“That was a long time ago, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, it was, sweetheart. I’m being a silly Billy. Of course, it’s absurd my being jealous of someone from Richard’s past. This all happened long before we met.”

Stacey didn’t say anything, but felt like Aunt Lora was sending her a message. Perhaps she was being too sensitive about Shane’s other life before they met. She told herself, she would act better. After all, she didn’t want to leave with a cloud of doubt between them.

The next week at the party, Shane was handing the twins to Stacey one at a time so they could slide down the slide in Stacey’s lap. When Jessie and Jackie decided that wasn’t fun enough, Stacey handed them up one at a time to slide down and their daddy to catch them at the bottom. Stacey slid down a few times with Nicky in her lap. Aunt Lora and Richard rode the merry-go-round with the girls and Shane held Nicky for a ride or two. The grandparents from Scotland were there as well as the O’Conner parents and children, the Graham parents and children along with the Grants and Matthew.

Stacey was sitting with Molly and Doctor Fein when Molly said, “Stacey dear, Donald mentioned you are going to Texas early. I don’t know if you would be interested or not, but I’m flying to Phoenix next week. You and the children are more than welcome should you care to join me. It’s a much shorter flight than by a commercial airliner. The children will be able to move about and play.”

Stacey was delighted to be offered the convenience and comfort of a private jet. “Thank you, Molly, I’ll talk with Shane and let you know. It sounds like a wonderful answer to our problem.”

Stacey didn’t mention Molly’s offer to Shane as his parents spent the night and returned to Edinburgh the next day. Stacey was on the phone with her mother when Shane arrived home. He over heard Stacey to say, “I’ll talk with Shane about it tonight. I see no reason why he would object.”

“What am I not going to object to?” he asked Stacey as he kissed her and the little ones hello.

“We’ll eat and get the kids in bed first, then we’ll talk,” Stacey said as she put the food on the table. Shane had that feeling in the pit of his stomach again, but he was determined not to loose his temper this time. He had come to realize, getting angry with Stacey made her dig her heels in deeper. He decided to calmly wait and hear what she had to say.

After the kids were in bed asleep, Stacey brought in coffee and sat down with Shane. He turned off the TV and asked, “What’s on your mind sweetheart?”

Stacey told him about the offer that Molly Fein had made to her. “You have no objection to this do you?”

“What if I do have objections, Stacey? Would you take them into considerations?”

“I don’t understand, Shane. Why do you object to the kids and me going ho...to the ranch a few weeks early.”

“Why don’t you say it, Stacey? Going home is what you really mean. You have never considered this your home.”

“Of course, I do. You’re here, my children were born here, but I the same as you have another home. We go up to Scotland at least once a month. I have not been back to Texas since....since Eric died.”

Stacey had not meant to say that. She remembered what she found when she returned. “Shane what’s your real reason for not wanting us to go? Do you have doubts about yourself?”

“Doubts? Doubts about myself, what do you mean?”

Stacey decided this argument had gone far enough. “Never mind, Shane. This arguing is getting us nowhere. I’m going to take Molly up on her offer, so deal with it. If you want us, back then come and get us.

We’ll be in Texas waiting. I love you, but I don’t know what your problem is.”

Well, that made two of them. He didn’t know what his problem was either. All he knew was he was afraid of losing Stacey and yet he pushed her farther away each time they argued. A week later, Stacey and the children left for the airport in a limousine with Molly Fein. Shane had kissed them all goodbye that morning and promised he would see them in three weeks. After their last argument, he and Stacey had not argued again. They laughed and played with the children and kept life as normal as possible at home.

When they boarded the Gulf Stream 4, Miles was waiting for them. Molly was surprised to see him. “What are you doing here?” Molly asked. “I thought you were on your way to Mexico.”

“I was, but the engine blew something, so I must hitch a ride with you. I hope I’m not inconveniencing you, Mother.” He smiled at Stacey and said, “Hello Stacey, welcome aboard.”