Return to Love

Return to Love

By Lynn Hubbard

Hiram, GA

USA

© 2012 by Lori Lynn Pound

Published by Lemon Press

www.lemonpresspublishing.com

All Rights Reserved

Joanie Caldwell sat on the front seat of the car next to her mother. She was happy to be going home, but she was still nervous. It had been over two years since she had left. However, during that time Joanie had transformed from a gangly child to a beautiful young woman. The car snaked its way across the broken concrete as they headed home. The roaring noise from the car’s wheels turning against the dimpled pavement filled the car and Joanie found herself lost in the tempo. Absent-mindedly she fingered one of the many rips on the car’s vinyl seat cover. The pair was jolted here and there as the tires hit the various potholes, which her mom had given up trying to avoid ages ago.

The withering road was slowly deteriorating from age and use. Over time, small cracks and crevices, spread out, and joined together to defend themselves against the daily onslaught of the traffic above. Relaxing, Joanie settled back into her reflections.

Her father had abandoned them when she was young. Leaving her, her mother and her older brother Brad, to fend for themselves. To make ends meet, her little family was forced to move into an apartment on the outskirts of Cincinnati. This is the same apartment; they were now heading towards. Things have always been difficult, but somehow they have always seemed to manage.

Then two years ago her father suddenly decided to come back into her life. He had finally sobered up enough to hold a job and ironically married the boss’s daughter. She came from a wealthy family; therefore, they were quite comfortable. Out of the blue, he appeared one day, insisting that he can give her a better life. He wanted Joanie to come, and live with him, in North Carolina, so he had brought her and Brad gifts and was immensely charming. This was the same quality, which had attracted her mother to him years ago.

It was the hardest decision of Carol’s life; Carol, Joanie’s mom, was working two jobs at the time just too barely cover their living expenses and was not able to spend much time with her children. Carol reluctantly agreed, thinking that Joanie's father could offer Joanie a better opportunity in life.

Therefore, Joanie found herself packed up and shipped off. It was the worst day of her life. She felt tears well up in her eyes as she thought of it. Her heart still ached from the memory. She knew that her mother was doing the best that she can, so she tried to be brave for her sake. She barely remembered the train ride or the short taxi drive.

She did, however, vividly remember the large house on the beach. Compared to her mother’s apartment it was like a castle. She soon found out that the inside was as cold and intimidating as the ancient relics she had read about in books on medieval times. The house was filled with furniture, which looked like it had never been sat upon. The walls covered in artwork if you could call it that. After her stiff hug from her stepmother, she had been instructed that the gaudy sculptures were extremely valuable, and she should not touch. Joanie rolled her eyes; after all, she was not a toddler. So began an unusually arduous relationship.

She quickly detested her stepmother, Samantha, and the feeling was mutual. She hated how she always swooped down the staircase and was always correcting something about Joanie. Whether it be her posture, table manners, English, etc. Her perfume was so strong, that Joanie almost retched, and her shrill laugh sent shudders down her spine. She was a natural blonde, or at least that’s what she claimed. Joanie soon learned to question everything she said.

There were some decent parts though. She did have her own room, at least for a while. In addition, Samantha was always dragging her out to shops to get her the latest fashions. Her father spent loads of time with her too. They would go for walks or to the movies. When Samantha realized that Joanie was taking his attention away from her, she demanded that Joanie be shipped off to a boarding school, fast. As Samantha explained, ‘So she could be taught to behave like a young woman.’ After a few phone calls, she was shipped off to Virginia to attend Miss Groves Preparatory School for young women.

Gazing out the window, she could see her reflection. She was small and slight with wavy brown hair that hung down below her shoulders. She considered it her greatest asset. Sometimes in certain light, you could make out a hint of auburn. Her face was naturally stunning which was convenient since she was not allowed to wear make-up. She had large green eyes, which set off her light complexion. Her high, cheekbones accentuated her pert mouth, in which, her lips at rest tilted upward in a mischievous smile. Topped off by a small (too small if you asked Joanie) nose which she considered was too pointy.

“We’re almost there!” Her mother said excitedly making Joanie jump.

She looked up from her trance and forced herself to smile. Her stomach was churning with anticipation. She loved her mom dearly and knew that she had only wanted what was best for her. Even though her mother could not give her material things the comfort and support she gave her was priceless. Joanie tensely returned to looking out the window. Butterflies were dancing around inside of her stomach, and her palms were starting to sweat. You are going home. What are you worried about? She thought. She took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself and forced a smile for her mother.

Condensation had built up on the window from the cold. She used her elbow, to clean a swatch of glass, wide enough to peer out. Not that, there was that much to see outside, she thought as she watched the large gray, brick buildings slid by. There were rows and rows of them like confederate soldiers standing at attention. The buildings blended with the gray sky and the gloom would have dampened most anyone’s spirit. Except for Joanie’s cause, she was going home.

The precious few trees scattered about the concrete landscape were naked. They stood sadly, their useless forms offering no shade or comfort to those that walked by. It was such a change from North Carolina, and Virginia‘s vast forests of green pines. Nevertheless, this was home. It was not much, but it was hers, it was all she had.

Her mother maneuvered her car in front of the brick apartment building she remembered so well. She looked around, as she, climbed out and stretched. It felt good; to be able to, move around after the long car ride from the bus station.

Joanie sighed, her eyes sliding up the tall building with no elevator, as she remembered they lived on the third floor. “Oh well.” She thought as she hefted out the heavy suitcase. Although, Samantha had bought her hordes of clothes she had only taken what she needed. She had left the others at the boarding school. She smiled imagining her father’s face when they had called him to tell him that she had been expelled.

She had tried to get along at the school, honestly she did. However, the others girls had already formed their groups, and she was not included. So instead of sitting around feeling sorry for herself, she poured herself into her schoolwork and additional activities. The school was a beautiful place, except for the people. They had horseback riding, which she quickly excelled at making the other girls envious. She had never been around horses before and promptly fell in love with the gentle creatures. The other ‘young ladies’ had taken to calling her stable girl since most of her free time was spent there. That was fine and dandy with her; the horses were better company anyway.

Although being expelled was not her fault, she did not regret it. Her father was so angry; he arranged to have her sent back to her mother on the next bus. This ironically, was where she had wanted to be in the first place.

Smiling she followed her mother upstairs lugging the suitcase behind her. Her mother had offered to take it, but Joanie had refused. Winded, she was relieved when they finally made it to their apartment.

Joanie was pleased to see that not much had changed in her absence. The apartment was small but cozy. It was only a one bedroom, but they made the best of it. Her and her mother would share the bedroom and Brad would sleep on the couch when he was around. She took in everything. The old, tired recliner was still slumped in the corner next to the floor lamp. Their wooden coffee table that was full of small nicks from the countless feet that had been propped on it. Carol gave up long ago trying to keep feet off it. Moreover, it felt mighty good for Carol to prop her feet up at the end of her long shift at the hospital and relax on the couch; of course she always took her shoes off first.

“Um... I cleared out half of the bureau for your things. Do you want me to help you unpack sweetheart?” Her mother asked a bit awkwardly it had been a long time since Joanie was home, too long.

“I think I can handle it but thanks mom.”

Joanie took her bag into the room she would be sharing with her mother and began putting her things into the small dresser. The room contained two twin beds the chest of drawers and a nightstand. She quickly hung up the rest of her clothes and placed Fluffy her teddy bear with one arm on the bed. He was injured ages ago during a pillow fight with her brother. Fluffy was hurt pretty badly, and after several attempts to try and save the limb with her needle pricked fingers Joanie finally accepted that it wasn’t meant to be. When her case was empty, she slid it under the bed. Satisfied, she went into the living room. She saw her mother in the adjoining kitchen and went to see her.

“That smells wonderful what are you cooking?” Joanie said inhaling the incredible aroma seeping out from the oven door.

Carol smiled at her daughter. “Since you are home I made your favorite desert. Apple pie from scratch. I made it yesterday and kept it in the fridge, so I could bake it fresh when you got home.” She added proudly.

“Oh mom you didn’t have to. It’s not like I’m a guest.” She said giving her a hug.

“I’m just so glad you’re back. I missed you so much. Kate has missed you too. She has been calling to see when you would be home.”

Joanie smiled. She and Kate have been best friends since forever. Even when she was gone, they wrote weekly letters and called when they could. She was looking forward to seeing her. She glanced at her mom wistfully.

“All right run along I know your dying to see her!” Her mom laughed shooing her out of the house. “Just be back for dinner!” She yelled to the spirited girl already bouncing down the stairs with renewed energy.

Joanie started towards Kate’s house. Though, she hadn’t been there in years she could have walked the two blocks blind folded. As she walked, she took the time to look over her old neighborhood. She was surprised at how little the city had changed. It felt like she was just here yesterday. There were a couple of people out raking up a few errant leaves, which held on longer than the rest. Children darted about enjoying their day off before they have to return to school again.

The air was crisp, yet, you could still detect a faint scent of exhaust, from the nearby factories, with their billowing smokestacks. If you looked in the right direction, you could see them puffing away around the clock. Her father had worked in a factory like that before he was fired for drinking on the job. Joanie turned away in disgust and shook her head, trying to clear her mind of the past.

Kate lived on a block of brick one-story houses. The houses were small and set close together, but Joanie still envied not having to climb all those stairs. Her steps quickened as Kate’s house came into view. She took the porch steps in one leap and knocked on the door.

“Come in!” She heard Kate yell, and she pushed open the door. Kate was a little taller and slimmer than Joanie. Kate’s hair was jet black and hung to her mid back. It complimented her olive complexion beautifully.

Kate came out of the bathroom, to see whom was there. A trace of toothpaste was still on her chin. Kate screamed and took just enough time to swipe her chin with her sleeve before grabbing Joanie in a bear hug. The two girls jubilantly hugged each other and jumped up and down in excitement.

“Gosh you look wonderful!” Kate said stepping back and looking over her friend. “You must have had boys swarming all over you in Virginia.”