Renegade Love (Rancheros) (18 page)

She sighed with pleasure as the warm water caressed her body and Esteban quickly turned away from her to collect himself, her soft sighs much too inviting. He had intended on washing her, but he realized it was not a wise idea. He’d never be able to stop himself from...

He heard the water splash and turned to look over his shoulder. He almost sighed with relief when he saw that his wife had scooped up the soap and was beginning to lather her hair. That was a task he could safely do... or so he thought.

He hunched down and took over scrubbing her hair, his strong fingers digging into her scalp and she sighed once again. It wasn’t only her sigh that affected him, it was seeing her now hard, wet nipples just waiting to be licked, nipped, suckled.

Esteban abruptly stopped scrubbing her hair and ordered, “Hurry and be done before the water grows cold.”

“How selfish of me enjoying the bath when you must wash too,” she said gently.

He wanted to kick himself. He hadn’t thought any such thing and yet he couldn’t correct her. He needed her out of that tub and dressed so that her naked body couldn’t tempt him anymore. Not that clothes would matter, her naked body was branded on his mind. Just the same, he hurried to fetch her nightgown.

When he turned around she was standing in front of the fire drying herself, the flickering flames casting a shadow of lights across her lovely body. He stood staring at the exquisite creature that had captured his heart so irrevocably.

She turned just a fraction and his eye caught sight of... he marched over to her, dropped the nightgown to the chair and startled her when his arm went around her waist and he turned her backside to the fire’s light. He ran his hand gently down her round bottom and stopped when he reached a dark spot.

“Who touched you?” he demanded, though he didn’t realize how harshly he spoke.

Rose was quick to answer feeling all too vulnerable naked beside him. “No one, I fell when struggling with the men and hit a rock.”

He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment annoyed with himself. The endless ride home had to have caused her pain but yet she had said nothing. But how could she have when he had warned her again and again not to say a word.

He spotted another bruise near her shoulder. How had he missed seeing these? He had been too intent on his own need to focus on her. He turned her around in his arms and took a step back to glance over her and see if he had missed any other injures she had suffered. He dropped down in front of her, his hand going to her knee where a large bruise began and his hand followed it up her leg along her thigh.

With a turn of his head, he was about to ask if it hurt when his eyes caught with the dark mound of hair between her legs. He stilled and took a deep breath, a mistake since his flared nostrils captured the fresh scent of her. Damn if he didn’t want to bury his face there and taste her until he made her cry out with pleasure.

He stood quickly, grabbed her nightgown and slipped it over her head and when she winced he cursed. He’d been rough in his hurry to cover her and she suffered for it. Damn his miserable soul or damn himself for growing so hard that he could think of nothing else but taking his wife to bed and making love to her all night.

He didn’t offer an apology. If he opened his mouth he just might kiss her, and then he wouldn’t stop. He turned his back on her before even dare saying, “Eat.” Then winced at his own word since he damn well ached to feast on her.

Whether it was wise to strip bare or not he didn’t care, he did so, needing to dunk himself in the tub water that had turned cold by now. To his relief, the water was cold enough to help somewhat and he immersed himself in it. What he didn’t count on was his wife standing beside the tub when he emerged, her naked body silhouetted beneath her nightgown by the fire’s light.

“You need hot water,” she said with such sincere concern that it squeezed at his heart, though didn’t temper his response.

“No, go eat,” he snapped and cringed as she turned and hurried to the table. He could see tears pooling in her eyes when she gave him a quick look after sitting, then turned away.

He mumbled several oaths directed all at himself and after a quick wash, he toweled himself dry and slipped into his robe that a servant had draped over a chair. He wanted to take his wife in his arms and... once again there would be no apology coming from his lips. He had been taught—no—he had been beaten anytime he had apologized after first being captured. Until he finally learned that he was never to apologize for anything he ever did. Old habits die hard as do memories of endless beatings.

He joined her at the table, her tears having been wiped away, though fresh ones lingered and she bravely fought them back. He poured himself a glass of wine and said, “Tell me more about your family, Gaby, and your father.”

She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment, as if what she was about to say was difficult, and it was. “My family proved no family at all. My mother cared only for herself and never wanted my twin sister and me from the beginning. She wanted us dead, but my true father had the courage to rescue us and bring us to California. To make certain no one would ever find us, he had us separated.” A tear slipped down her cheek. “My twin died when she was just a baby.”

Esteban said nothing, knowing she had to talk and he had to listen. And he wanted to, he wanted to know it all, everything she had been through.

“After all the years of being hunted, we were tracked to the mission and in the end my father, my true father, saved mine and Gaby’s life. I do hope he survived. I so want to get to know him. He seems such a good man.”

Esteban saw how exhausted she was and suggested they get some rest. “You can tell me more another time.”

Rosa didn’t argue, she eagerly climbed into bed, but was shocked when her husband wished her a good-night and walked into the next room. She sat up in bed and stared at the closed door. She could not believe he left her there to sleep alone. She had thought— no she wanted— him there beside her in bed. She wanted his strong arms around her, his warm body pressed to hers and why... why didn’t he seal their vows? What was wrong with her that he didn’t make love to her?

She dropped back on the bed suddenly too upset to sleep. She had missed him so very much while she was away. It made her realize that somehow she had fallen in love with her husband. She wasn’t sure how it had happened, it simply had, but wasn’t that the way of love? It struck in its own good time. And tonight when he had been so tender and caring with her, she had thought that perhaps he was beginning to have feelings for her.

He could have left the servants to care for her, but he hadn’t. He had seen to her care himself and had been so tender with her. He still issued orders and snapped now and then but how could anyone expect him to completely shed the renegade that was part of him now. It wasn’t fair of anyone to think he could simply return to who he had once been. It would take time to reclaim parts of who he once had been, as it would take her time to deal and heal with all she had just learned about her true family.

Memories of her true father being so badly wounded while trying to protect her and Gaby came unbidden. She quickly shut her eyes against the images and fought back tears that once again threatened to spill.

All she knew of her father was that he had risked his life and given up all he knew to save and protect his twin daughters. He had told her that he had cared for her and her sister on the ship that brought them to California and how much he had enjoyed his time with them. He had known that the only true way to keep them safe was to separate them and keep his distance in case anyone from Spain tracked him here. His unselfishness had saved them even at the very end.

She prayed that her father had survived and that they would get to know each other for she already loved the man who had given her life and saved her life.

Her eyes sprung open and she couldn’t stop the tears... she wept.

~~~

Esteban paced in his room. As tired as he was, he knew sleep would elude him tonight. Surprisingly, it wasn’t images of his wife naked that filled his head but the thought of all she had been through while in Los Angeles and all she had learned about her true family.

He wished he had been there with her. He should have been there with her. He was her husband and should have been there to ease this heavy burden for her. Instead he had showed up and swept her away without any knowledge of all she had endured. He had thought to protect her and he had only made it worse for her.

A sound interrupted his pacing and he paused to listen. It took only a moment for him to recognize it. He went to the door that separated their bedrooms, swung it open and his heart felt as if it broke when he heard his wife’s heartbreaking sobs. He hurried to the bed, shedding his robe along the way and slipped beneath the covers and took her in his arms.

He wrapped her close, laying his leg across hers to inch her even closer. Her slim arms went around him and she pressed her face against his chest and continued crying.

He kissed the top of her head, then whispered, “I’m here,
Caro
, I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.” She cried harder and he wondered if his words had upset her even more, but then she pressed harder against him and her arms tightened around him and he knew. She did want him there with her and he wanted to be there... always.

He knew the tears were necessary. They would help heal her and so he held her, stroked her back, and let her cry. He didn’t know how long she cried. He only knew when she stopped, her breathes coming in short spurts. Then he felt her body ease and was relieved that sleep had finally claimed her.

Shortly after, he fell asleep himself, though was woken often throughout the night by his wife’s fitful sleep. His hands stroked her gently and he reminded her in soft whispers that he was there with her. She calmed and once again slept peacefully.

It made him recall his own fretful sleep after he’d been captured. The worst part was waking the next day to discover that he truly was living a nightmare. He wouldn’t let that happen to Rosa. She would wake in his arms knowing she was safe.

Rosa snuggled in the warmth not wanting to leave it. It felt much too wonderful and she felt much too content, more content than she had been in a long time. She shifted a bit to relieve the annoying pain in her shoulder and that’s when memories of yesterday returned. She had cried herself to sleep in her husband’s arms.

She raised her head to find him staring down at her.

“How are you feeling this morning?” he asked.

His concerned tone warmed her heart. “A bit sore.”

“I will make certain that you remain in bed and rest today.”

A tingle ran through her. Would he join her? Did she want him to? The tingle spread giving her the answer, though her heart had known the answer all along. It was just that she was nervous, unsure of how it would be between them. Would he treat her well or was there too much of a renegade in him still?

She wasn’t sure if it was relief or disappointment that struck her when he eased her away from him and slipped out of bed. She stared at him as he walked naked to the chair to retrieve his robe. He was powerfully built... everywhere. And it was when he turned, slipping into his robe, that she realized how hard he was, and the sight of him aroused with such passion, further aroused her own desire. So why was he leaving her? Why not stay and make love?

“I will see that breakfast is brought to you,” he said and walked to the door.

Rosa sat up staring at the closed door he had disappeared behind just as he had done last night. Why would he not make love to her? She almost laughed aloud at her own thought. She had first feared intimacy with her husband and now here she was aching for it. How strange, but then she had never expected to fall in love with him and yet she had... and it made all the difference.

~~~

Esteban dressed quickly and left his room, giving orders to a passing servant as to Rosa’s breakfast, and then left the hacienda. He couldn’t trust himself to remain near his wife or else he’d... he shook his head. He headed for the orchards to clear his head and ease his ache, though he wondered if that was possible. He wanted his wife with an intense passion that he had never known, and it worried him. It had been ingrained in him to claim his woman and damn if he didn’t want to claim Rosa. Just the thought of her on her knees and he driving into her with a force that would brand her his made him...

He shook his head again chasing away the image. He couldn’t do that to her. It wasn’t right. She was his wife and should be treated with respect. He reached and picked an orange off the tree, and then froze as he turned to look over the orchard. He felt someone approach before he saw him.

He recognized the man right away, one of Pacquito’s men, Carlos. He was of no great importance in Pacquito’s camp, but then few were. What mattered was serving Pacquito, doing his bidding, and above all making no mistakes that would cost you your life.

Esteban said nothing even when Carlos stopped in front of him. He waited, rolling the orange around in his hand, as if the man’s presence meant nothing to him.

“A gift, how nice.” Carlos grinned and reached for the fruit.

“If you value your hand, you’ll keep it at your side.”

Fear sprang in Carlos’s eyes. He had seen what Esteban was capable of whether he carried a weapon or not and he lowered his arm, making certain to keep his hand away from his sheathed knives.

“Pacquito says it’s time for you to return home.”

“I am home.”

“Pacquito never released you. He’s giving you a chance to return on your own and suffer no consequences.”

Esteban took a quick step forward, causing Carlos to stumble back in fright. “I am done with Pacquito.”

“No one is ever done with Pacquito unless... death claims you.”

Esteban knew all too well how true that was, which was why when he left he knew it wasn’t over. It was just a matter of time. “I’m done.”

“That you are, my friend.” Carlos sneered and turned to walk away.