Remember Me (7 page)

It took Shayne a while to reach out to me, but after he rescued me one night at the beach, from a terrible situation, I started doing all of my partying at his place.

He probably felt sorry for my demise. In a way, I wanted the attention. I wanted anything that would make the pain go away. 

After failed counseling sessions and a dozen antidepressants
, I was left feeling even more lost. I’d pretty much reached rock bottom when I saw Ford with Sky for the first time. I’d been messaging him, but always knew he didn’t want to hang out.

After that night, I fled back to the beach and ended up sleeping with Shayne and Peyton’s brother.

It was such a mistake. I regretted it even while it was happening. I’d stooped so low and prepared myself for that life ending blow to my humanity.

To protect his brother, Shayne buried the event, promising to never speak of it. A few pregnancy tests later and all of that went to shit.

The rest is part of the story that brought us together. Though it was a horrible way to fall in love, it had happened. I owed him so much, especially the way I’d handled Ford, and my pregnancy.

I’d cost them their
friendship. It was all my fault.

“Peyton, nobody wants to see Ford and Shayne reconcile more than me. I’m afraid it’s goin’ to take a little more than Sky’s best friend bein’ nice to me for that to happen.”

“It’s still a start. They can’t fight like this forever. So what if you slept with Shayne. You and Ford weren’t together, right?”

She didn’t have a clue.

I nodded, unable to admit anything out loud. I was sick of lying.

With two little ones and a new relationship to worry about, I needed to focus on the future and no longer the past.

“Well, Lacey said the twins are super cute. I think she’s tryin’ real hard to be your friend.”

Thankfully,
Eli woke up and started screaming from the top of his healthy lungs. It was enough to wake his sister and cause Peyton to have to help me out.

I appreciated the interruption, but knew it wouldn’t be the last time she tried to talk about it. At some point I was going to have to do something to get the family off my back, which pretty much meant that I needed to figure out how to make Ford forgive Shayne.

Chapter 9

Shayne

My uncle was in his office when I arrived.
He had a cigarette in his mouth and was telling my aunt to start making the coffee.

I walked right in and sat down in front of him. “What’s goin’ on nephew? You fightin’ with your dad again?”

“When am I not? He can’t get off my ass. I’m tired of hearin’ his shit. Now he’s all about me bein’ responsible, but he doesn’t get how hard it is to manage twins.”

He put out his cigarette
and blew the smoke to the side. “He’s just bein’ a dad, Shayne. We’re always hard on our sons.”

My aunt came in and kissed me on the cheek. “How are the twins?”

She looked so good, but every time I did see her, I thought about that night that we pulled her out of that crack house. That image would never be forgotten.

“They’re good. I swear they’ve grown a whole inch since we brought them home.”

“How’s Ashley?”

My uncle shook his head. As
hley wasn’t his favorite person, but my aunt wasn’t around for any of the drama, so she didn’t understand. “She’s doin’ alright. You know, we’re not gettin’ much sleep. Eli and Beka take turns in the middle of the night. I think it’ll be better once we get them on the same schedule. Right now it’s just hectic with me going back to work. Peyton’s comin’ over now to help Ash durin’ the day while I’m gone. I think that will help out a ton.”

“I agree. It was hard for me with one infant at a time. I give you props for havin’ two.
On top of that, you’re in a new relationship. I don’t see how you two are making it look so easy.”

After years of being away from our family my aunt was back. Her sense of humor had come back with her, as well as her ability to the see the good in people. I appreciated that when I felt like the whole world was against me.

“Shayne, what brings you in here? What can I do for you today?”

“I was hoping that you would give me a job or point me in the direction of where I can go to get one.”

He tossed some trash into the can while laughing at my request. “You know you’re never going to leave that custom shop. Your dad’s built that business for you to take over, boy.”

“Like I said before, sir, I can’t deal with him anymore. I need a change.”

“If that’s what you really want, here’s someone that can probably help. Though, I don’t know how far you’ll get with him.”

I looked down at the card and saw a name I didn’t expect.

Ford Cooper

Vice President

I shook my head and sat the card down on the table. “That ain’t goin’ to work.”

He pushed it back towards me. “Take the card, Shayne. If you really want out, that’s the kind
of company you need to get in with. You know just as much as Ford did when he started.”

“It’s not that easy. You know we ain’t talkin’.”

“Look, you two need to cut the shit. He’s moved on. You bein’ with that girl shouldn’t make a bit of difference. If she’s what you want none of us can stop ya. I’m just glad he got away from her. She wasn’t right for him.”

I got up feeling like I was going to punch my uncle. “Thanks, but no thanks.”

“Shayne, don’t get mad. That girl caused my son and daughter a lot of grief. I’m sorry if you don’t understand, but I can’t ever forgive her for that. If you’re plannin’ a future with her, you need to be okay with that.”

I leaned on his desk and looked him right in the eye. “No matter what anyone thinks, I’m stayin’ with Ashley. We’re together now and there’s nothin’ that anyone can do about it. She’s a solid part of this family whether anyone accepts it or not. The twins have our blood runnin’ through their veins. That’s never goin’ to change.”

“Boy, I’m aware of that. It don’t change how I feel. Now, I’ll love those kids, but I can’t condone that girl being anything but a burden on this family.”

“Whatever!” I threw up my arms and walked out of the garage, avoiding saying anything else to my uncle.

I waved to my aunt before pulling away, stirring up a cloud of dust as I left.

I crumpled up Ford’s card and tossed it on the seat next to me, but soon reconsidered when I realized that I didn’t have a pot to piss in if I wanted to get away from my dad.

After I pulled over and tried to calm down, I realized I was sitting in front of the farmhouse that I’d dreamed of. All I kept thinking about was the twins and how I wanted them to have a good life. I didn’t want them running around in our tiny apartment, not when I had the means to buy them something nice. For what I was paying in rent, I could easily afford a house of my own.

Feeling like I had nowh
ere else to turn, I unfolded the paper and called my cousin.

“This is Ford.”

“Hey, it’s me, Shayne. You got a minute?”

“That depends what you want?”

I shook my head and leaned against the steering wheel. “Look, I know you hate me
, and the fact that I’m with Ash, but I’m in a real bind.”

He began to laugh, like my life was a joke to him. “What do you want, Shayne?”

“Can we just put aside the past and talk as family, for once?”

“Sure. Now tell me why you’re callin’.”

I sighed, knowing right away that he wasn’t going to go for anything I had in mind. “Do you think you can get me a job? Before you say no, just think about how you’d be helpin’ out two little children that deserve a good life, no matter what their parents have done.”

“Shayne, I think you’re forgettin’ that I know your little secret. Now, I know you’ve told me that Parker signed off and you
’re name is on those birth certificates. If bein’ their father is what you really want, I won’t stand in your way. It’s your choice. I just can’t be a part of the lie.”

“Ford, it ain’t a lie. Not to me. They are mine, in every way that counts. I’m goin’ to do right by Ash and give her a good life, whether you all believe me or not. I love her, cuz. I swear I do. It’s different with her. She makes me want to be better.”

The line got quiet and I considered that he’d hung up, tired of hearing about me and his ex.

“After everything, it would be nice for her to have a reason to be better. There was a time when I worshipped the ground she walked on, so I can see where you think she’s great. Just remember that it ain’t
always the sex though.”

I chuckled loud enough that he heard me.

“What’s so funny?”

“Dude, we haven’t -
” I paused, thinking about how to admit it. “We still aren’t allowed to fuck.”

“Are you shittin’ me?”

“I wish I was. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s been hell.”

When the line got quiet again I knew it was because he was thinking about what to say to me. “Listen, I’ll give you credit. If you’re really plannin’ a life with a woman that you’ve never even slept with then you’re a hell of a lot braver than me. There’s no way in hell I could do that. I need to know what I’m gettin’ into.”

“I didn’t call for your opinion and just so you know, I’m pretty sure from what we have done that there won’t be any disappointment in that department. Being that you’ve already been down that road I will appreciate it if you leave that topic alone. I didn’t call you to talk about Ash. I’m in a bind. I can’t be around my dad anymore. He’s makin’ my life harder than it needs to be. I’ve been workin’ on cars for as long as you and could be a  good addition to what you’re doing over there. I’m not askin’ to be your friend again, Ford. I know I’ve fucked that all up. I’m just tryin’ to do right by my life and my future. I’ve got mouths to feed and I want them to be taken care of. I can’t do that and deal with my dad. You know how he is.”

“Yeah,” he agreed. “He’s a pain in the ass.”

“Can you just talk to Sky’s dad? Put in a good word for me or somethin’? I need a career and takin’ over the business ain’t workin’ out.”

“Before I do anything, you know I need to talk to Sky. I can’t do somethin’ like that behind her back, because like it or not, you’re tied to Ash. I’m thinkin’ about poppin’ the question soon and I can’t afford for her to be pissed at me.”

“I wouldn’t have called if I wasn’t desperate. I mean, I could fill out applications, but they’re goin’ to start me at nothin’. I was thinkin’ about buyin’ that old Baker house. You know the one I’m talkin’ about?”

“Yeah. It needs work. I heard they trashed the inside.”

“I don’t know. I’m willing to do work to it. It’s just off the beaten path and the kids would have room to grow.”

“You sound like an old man.”

I sighed, feeling so completely exhausted. “Just say you’ll help a brother out. Tell me that after all our bullshit, you can look past it for family. Please, Ford. I just need a chance.”

“I’ll talk to Sky tonight and call you tomorrow. I can’t make you any promises. There’s a lot of bad blood between the four of us. Even though Sky has forgiven you, doesn’t mean she’s ready to be friends with Ash. I don’t know if that will ever happen.”

“It’s funny, you mention Sky forgiving me, but not you. How many times do I need to say I’m sorry?”

“You really are desperate. Look, what you’re doin’ with Ash is crazy, but I get it. I don’t hate you, I just need to be away from it all. I’m trying to start a future with Sky and for a while you kept us apart. I guess I’m over it. I don’t want to beat your ass when I see you, so that’s a good start.”

“You can’t beat my ass anyway,” I taunted.

“Bullshit! It’s a good thing I
have control of my emotions.”

“I’m not goin’ to push this. It would be cool if we could meet up for a beer and talk about this, as cousins and as friends.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow. Don’t get your hopes up yet, though.”

I thanked him before hanging up. Even if I didn’t get a new job, I could still feel better about the relationship between me and Ford, who used to be my best friend and closest relative.

Since I was already at the farm house, I decided to get out and walk around. Ford wasn’t kidding when he said that they’d messed up a bunch of things. The porch was dilapidated and the door was hanging off the hinges. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get inside, so I walked around and peered into the windows. The carpets had been removed and the subflooring was all that was left. The kitchen cabinets had been torn down and removed. All that was left was a shell. Still curiosity got the best of me. For some reason I could see myself living there.

I made a call to the relator and set up and appointment. With no one to go with me, I set out to read up on everything I could until I was able to go inside and access it for myself.

I’d accomplished nothing, but when I walked into the apartment and saw Ash, I felt hopeful. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I felt relieved, like everything was going to work out.