Reluctantly Royal (21 page)

“He loved you two very much.” I continued to trace the delicate ring.

“I miss him,” she mumbled.

“That’s natural.” I turned my face so I could kiss her head. “It’ll get better.”

“Promise?” Her voice was so soft I almost didn’t hear her.

“It takes time.” I sighed. “But yes, I promise.”

“Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me.” I closed my eyes and listened to her breathing. As it slowed, I shifted on my pillow and threw my arm over my head. For a minute I wasn’t sure if I would be able to sleep, but as I listened to her breathing, I found mine matching hers, and before I knew it I was asleep.

I must’ve been more tired than I’d realized because it wasn’t until I tried to roll over that I remembered someone was in the bed with me. Meredith’s leg was draped over mine; the T-shirt she had borrowed had ridden up to expose a delectable amount of flesh. My eyes scanned her face as her breath tickled my skin.

Her red hair was spread out around her head like a halo of fire. Her dark eyelashes rested against her cheeks. Delicate fingers twitched on my chest as she dreamed, and I wondered what she was seeing.

“You’re doing it again.” Her voice surprised me. I hadn’t realized she’d woken up. Her eyes were still closed but her breathing had hitched.

“What?”

“Staring.” She opened her eyes with a small smile.

“It’s not my fault.” I tilted her chin up so that I could see her eyes clearly. “You’re worth staring at.”

“Is that why you drew me?” She cocked an eyebrow.

“I had a nightmare.” I watched her face, noting the way her eyes crinkled in the corners.

She scrunched up her nose. “That’s not exactly a compliment.”

“From the time my father died, I’ve had a recurring nightmare.” I swallowed. “When it happens, the only thing that helps is drawing. For some reason the other morning when it happened, it was your face that made me feel better.”

She reached up and traced my cheek with her fingers. Sitting up, she looked down at me for a minute before pulling my borrowed shirt up and over her head. The black of her bra and panties contrasted sharply with her fair skin. Shaking her hair out, she looked down at me, her eyes full of emotion.

My pulse sped up as she sat up on her knees and ran her hands down my chest before sliding them back up to my shoulders. Lowering her mouth, she brought her lips to mine in a butterfly-soft kiss. When her tongue traced my bottom lip, I had to grip the sheets to keep from trying to take control. There was something special about having her take the lead. Plus it was fucking sexy to know that she wanted me. I could get used to waking up this way.

She shifted so that she was straddling me and I let myself rest my hands on her waist. I needed to touch her, even though I sensed it was important that she was initiating this and that she was in control. Her kiss deepened, her tongue tangling with mine, and my brain fought to stay calm. Red hair curtained our faces as she kissed me senseless, narrowing my world until it was just the two of us.

My hands moved of their own accord, along her ribs, over her shoulders, until I traced the straps of her bra. With delicate fingers I slid the straps down her arms before running my hands up over her neck so I could cup her jaw. She sighed into my mouth, her fingers on my shoulders tightening.

Sitting up, she reached behind her, undoing the bra and exposing her pert breasts to my attention. Unable to resist the temptation, I sat up on one elbow and caught a pink peak with my mouth. She gasped and let her head fall back while she tangled her fingers in my hair. Her skin was creamy and smooth and I couldn’t get enough of it. With my free hand I cupped her other breast, gently rolling the nipple between my fingers while I devoured the first tantalizing peak.

Her moan resonated through my body and I pushed up so that I was in a sitting position. I shifted her so that my shaft was pressed against her hot center, and gripped her ass with my hands. Yanking on my hair, she lifted my face so that she could kiss me. Her mouth was hungry and demanding, her soft lips firm as she took what she wanted.

When her hips shifted, rubbing against me, I groaned. I ran my hands over her lithe body, across the smooth skin of her back, and pulled at the clasp of her garter belt. As I fumbled with the hooks, she let go of my hair and reached around to help me undo the hooks. Grabbing her hands, I kept them pinned behind her back while I feasted on her flesh. I ran my lips over her neck and scraped my teeth along her collarbone, eliciting a shiver.

Her breathing increased, which made her chest rise and fall in front of my face. Unable to help myself, I caught one peak with my teeth, teasing it with my tongue while she wiggled on top of me. The feel of her hips pressing against mine drove me over the edge. I let go of her hands, which went straight back to my head, where they fisted tightly in my hair. Ripping her garter belt off, I threw it on the floor before rolling over so that she was on her back.

She looked up at me with hooded eyes before reaching for the band of my underwear. I sat up on my knees and helped her slide them off, closing my eyes when she wrapped her hand around me. She shifted so that she was on her knees, before leaning forward and pressing her lips to my head. Her warm, moist mouth slid over my dick in wet strokes, causing me to moan. Wanting to see her, I gathered her hair on the top of her head and out of the way. I watched as she sucked and licked me, her gorgeous eyes turned up at me.

When my hips began to move, I groaned. It was too good, too perfect. If I let her go on, I was going to lose it. When I tugged on her hair gently, she shifted back up so that I could capture her mouth with mine. Sliding my hands down over the curve of her back, I slid her panties down so that she could kick them off.

She pushed on my shoulders so that I was forced to sit down. With a determined look, she crawled onto my lap and grasped my shaft.

“I want you, Max.” She positioned me at her opening before letting gravity do its job.

I groaned loudly; her slick excitement was almost too much to take. When she began to move, rocking against me, my head fell back and I groaned.

“Watch me, Max.” Leaning forward, she caught my ear with her teeth. “I want you to see me.”

“Fuck,” I whispered in Lilarian. “You feel so good. So wet. For me.”

“For you.” She groaned, her hips picking up the pace. “Look at me. I want to see what I make you feel.”

I opened my eyes and met her stare. She made me feel a lot of things. Could she see what she had done to me? She had changed my life in a matter of days. Would she be able to see that I had fallen in love with her?

The reality of that thought shot through my system like lightning. I loved this woman. Sometime when I wasn’t paying attention, she had become mine. Did she know that? Would she object?

The tempo of her movements increased, her breasts rising and falling with each breath.

I fisted my hand in the hair at the base of her neck and pressed my forehead to hers.

“You’re going to make me come, sweet Meredith.” My Meredith. “You’re too much, too fucking perfect.”

She picked up her pace, her soft moans of pleasure rocking me closer to my edge.

“Max.” She gasped my name as her eyes went wide. Her body jerked against mine as pleasure slammed into her, but not once did she close her eyes. Watching her topple over the peak of orgasm finished me. My body shook as an orgasm so intense I thought it would shatter me rocked through my body.

She watched me with heavily lidded eyes as I unraveled beneath her. I pressed my lips to her, kissing her softly, the tips of our tongues coming together in a gentle dance as we reveled in the pleasure our bodies had experienced.

Three simple words sat on the tip of my tongue when she pulled back to look at me. Her eyes were full of heat and pleasure. Instead, I wrapped an arm around her waist and buried my face in her chest. The need I felt to tell her—to try and keep her forever—scared me. She had busted all of my boundaries and walls without trying.

I had to figure out how I was going to keep her.

FIFTEEN

I
WAS DONE FOR.
The battle was over, if it had ever begun. I’d lost my heart to a prince. And I hadn’t exactly been sitting around waiting for a prince to show up. I’d thought I didn’t need anyone; I didn’t need anyone. But I wanted him. All of him.

I wanted what I had seen in his eyes just a moment ago.

“Max . . .” I closed my mouth. Could I say it? The words that would leave me open for even more pain? How had I done this to myself again? And what was I going to do about it?

“You’re gorgeous, Meredith.” He lifted his head and looked into my eyes. “Every single inch of you is perfect. I could spend an eternity studying every nook and cranny.”

“Well, I think you’ve gotten a good head start.” I lifted myself off him and lay down on the bed. Feigning nonchalance, I stretched and watched as his eyes traveled over my body.

“So I have.” He chuckled. Lying down on his side next to me, he trailed his fingers along my stomach and over the curve of my hip. “But there’s a lot more I still want to do to you.”

My heart sped up at that thought. “What do you have in mind?”

“I’d rather show you than tell you.” His deep, masculine chuckle sent a wave of goose bumps over my body. “Hm. Looks like you approve of that idea.”

“I’m not opposed—”

“Mom!” Marty’s voice sounded from the hallway and I sat up straight, grabbing for the blankets.

Max hopped out of the bed and tossed me my dress. I pulled it on over my head and almost jumped out of my skin when I felt Max’s fingers sliding the zipper up.

“Just a minute!” I called to stall Marty.

“Are you in Max’s room?” Marty knocked on the door.

I glanced over my shoulder and shoved my hair out of my face. Max was pulling on his pants, his shirt already in place, and nodded at me.

“I’m here.” I opened the door and looked down at my son.

“I couldn’t find you.” His eyes were accusing.

“I’m sorry.” I looked back at Max. “I was talking with Max and we didn’t want to wake you up.”

I cringed. I never lied to Marty. Well, except about Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, but those didn’t count. And technically there had been some talking. Some very . . . interesting talking.

“Oh.” Marty’s gaze shifted past me toward Max. “Were you sleeping?”

“Yes.” Max nodded his head decisively. “We were sleeping.”

“I thought you were talking.” Marty narrowed his eyes.

“We fell asleep while talking,” I rushed to clarify.

“Okay.” He wasn’t convinced. I didn’t blame him. Max and I looked guiltier than a couple of kids found at make-out point.

“What did you need, sweetie?” Out of the corner of my eye I noticed my panties on the floor next to the desk and kicked them out of sight.

“I wanted to know if I could go feed the birds, but Alex said I had to let you know where I was first.” He looked up at me with big eyes. “Can I go? I’ll be fast so we won’t be late for dinner. Please?”

I scanned the room, searching for a clock. It was late afternoon and almost time for dinner.

“Have you eaten anything?”

“I had some fruit.” He smiled up at me.

“Grab your jacket. It’s getting cold at night right now.”

“Woo-hoo!” He tore out of the room.

“Your brother will take good care of him, right?” I looked back over at where Max was sitting on the bed. “He’s not going to have his eyeballs pecked out or anything, right?”

Max chuckled and stood up. “Marty is in the safest of hands.”

“Has he ever watched kids Marty’s age?” I let my hands fall to my sides as he walked toward me.

“Alex is the favorite of all the cousins.” He tilted my face up toward his. “We have a very large family. Lots of little ones running around all the time.”

“Why aren’t you the favorite?” He had such an affinity with Marty, I couldn’t imagine him not getting along with all of his cousins.

He shrugged uncomfortably. “I suppose I never really tried.”

“Were you scared of them?” I laughed, but his frown stopped me. “But you’re so good with Marty.”

“Alex has always wanted kids.” His eyebrows drew together. “And they just gravitated to him.”

“Huh.” I studied his face. “So you don’t want kids.”

“No.” He frowned. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

I cringed inwardly. He didn’t want children? I was a single mother. Marty was my world. But he wasn’t sure. Had something happened to change his mind? Had we changed his mind?

“Don’t look at me like that.” He reached out and tugged on my hair.

“What has you waffling?” I knew better than to put on an act. Somehow Max saw right through me. Instead I chewed on my lip.

He opened his mouth and then closed it. Mr. Confident looked nervous. “I don’t know.”

“Huh.”

“Don’t do that.” He stroked my cheek.

“What?”

“ ‘Huh’ me.” He shook his head. “It’s what Cathy and Sam do when they think they know something I don’t.”

“Are they usually right?” I raised my eyebrow.

“That’s not the point.” He smiled. “The point is that I’m . . . I’m not sure what I want anymore.”

“Not sure about anything?” The words fell from my mouth before I could rethink them.

“I’m sure that I want to do what we just did again.” He ran his thumb over my bottom lip. “I’m sure that I want to go fishing with Marty again. That I want to spend more time with both of you.”

His eyes traced my face, looking for something.

“What do you want?” he asked.

You
, my mind screamed.
I want you
. But my mouth wouldn’t say the words. Instead I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him.

His arm slid around my waist, tucking me against his body. I leaned into his kiss, trying to convey what I hadn’t been able to say aloud.

Someone cleared their throat and I broke our kiss, but Max kept me pinned to his side.

“Sorry to interrupt.” Cathy was looking anywhere but at us.

“What do you want?” Max growled at his sister.

“Well, we just thought you might want to eat dinner, but if you’re too busy, I’ll just let the others know . . .”

“No, thank you. I’m starved.” I lifted my hand to my mouth. Well, I guess the cat was out of the bag.

“Oh, thank God. I would hate to have interrupted and you weren’t hungry.” She motioned between us. “Because this could have been all awkward for no reason.”

“Awkward is one word for it.” Max narrowed his eyes. “Annoying is another.”

“Well, that’s one way of looking at it.” She backed away from the door. “I’m going to go. And don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone what I saw. Not a soul. Except for Sam. Who will probably tell Alex. You know how they are. Yak, yak. No secrets.”

“Get out of here.” Max kicked the door shut, but we could still hear her laughing as she walked down the hall.

I turned to look at Max with wide eyes before busting out laughing. Max studied me with an amused expression. Running my hands through my hair, I took a deep breath.

“Are you upset?” His eyes watched me carefully.

“No.” I shook my head. “You asked me what I wanted earlier.”

“Yes.” He touched my cheek and my eyes fluttered shut briefly.

“I want to keep spending time with you. I want you to go fishing with Marty. I want to frame that picture you drew of me so I can always remember that I was the one that soothed you when you were upset.” I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. “And that’s a problem. Because I want there to be something between us. But what I want in life doesn’t add up for you. I want to sing on stage, on Broadway. I want to make people feel something, and that is the last thing you want.”

Reaching down, he grabbed my hand and pulled it up to his lips. “That’s not something you need to worry about right now.”

My heart stuttered in my chest. I wanted that to be true. “Good, because I have a lot of other things to worry about.”

“No you don’t.” He tugged me against his chest.

“Tomorrow is sort of scary.” I looked up at him, and my voice cracked. “I don’t know what to expect.”

“Whatever comes, I’ll be there with you.” His green eyes stared down into mine. “You won’t be alone.”

It had been a long time since I’d been willing to depend on someone else, to count on anyone else. In the last few years I’d been the person Granddad had leaned on; I’d reminded him to take his medicine, made sure the staff was getting him to his appointments. All of that from London while being a single mom and going to school. Thank God I hadn’t had to work a job too.

“Okay,” I whispered.

“Then let’s go eat.”

He kept his fingers laced with mine as we walked through the house. Despite Cathy warning us to hurry up, we were the first people in the dining room. It was odd to sit at this huge, empty table full of food while everyone else finished what they were doing. It wasn’t that the silence was uncomfortable, but I couldn’t stop mulling over how things would end with Max. A mutual parting of ways? Slowly drifting apart? A fight? Would he wait until I was back to singing to decide it just didn’t work?

“Wash your hands!” Samantha’s voice carried down the hallway. It was followed by stampeding feet and the slam of a door.

I winced. “I hope he didn’t break anything.”

“This house has survived countless children. I’m sure it can handle Marty.” Max chuckled, but his face took on a serious cast. “You look worried.”

“Did you hear my child stampeding through your house? You should be worried.” I tried to shrug it off. Hopefully Marty hadn’t done much damage. I had enough to worry about.

“I told you not to worry about tomorrow.” He rested his hand on top of mine.

“I’m trying.” I smiled at him, a little relieved that he assumed it was about the will.

He kept his hand on mine, even as everyone filled into the room talking animatedly. No one blinked an eye at us, not even Marty. He was too busy describing the birds he had seen.

“It was huge. Like half the size of me!” He held his hand up from the floor to demonstrate.

“They let you hold a bird that big?” I looked over his head at Alex.

“She’s a sweetheart,” Alex assured me. “Wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

“And I fed her a whole rat!” Marty tugged on my arm.

I leveled my gaze on the heir to the throne. “Not a fly, huh?”

“Rats are different.” He cringed.

“He was actually really great with the birds.” Sam reached out and touched my arm. “Very calm and patient.”

“Thank you for letting him go with you.”

“He livens the place up. You should bring him around more often.” Sam threw me a sly smile. “We’d always be happy to babysit.”

“Um, I’m not a baby.” Marty pursed his lips.

“Excuse me, kid sit.” Sam ruffled his hair.

“Actually, are you busy tomorrow?” Max asked as he pulled a seat out for me.

“I’ve got to go to Rousseau tomorrow. Did you need me to watch Marty?” She smiled at my son.

“I can call our nanny. Don’t worry about it.” I shook my head. “We’ve disrupted your schedules enough already.”

“I wouldn’t mind. He can keep me company while I take care of a few things.” Sam smiled at me. “Really. It would be no trouble.”

“Please, Mom?” Marty grabbed my arm.

Sending my rambunctious six-year-old with a busy, pregnant princess didn’t seem like the best idea. I looked at Max and then back at Marty.

“She’ll have Chadwick with her. It’s not like she would be chasing him around.” Max shrugged.

“We’ll be fine. It’ll be a good practice run for Chadwick.” Sam laughed.

“Marty can be a handful.” I frowned.

“I’m just going to sign some papers and then we can go fishing.” Sam smirked. “Unlike some people, I actually know how to fish.”

“Hey. I know how to fish.” Max lifted his fork and pointed at her. “It’s just been a while since I did it.”

“Right.” Sam shook her head. “The point is, you’re busy tomorrow and I’m not.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah! I miss being outside. I haven’t been out for anything fun in a while.” She dug into her food. “I’m getting antsy.”

“That’s true. She gets crabby when she’s been stuck doing desk work for too long,” Cathy added.

“If you’re sure.”

“Absolutely.” She nodded her head. “Please let me take him with me? It’ll be nice to have the company. Chadwick refuses to fish.”

Cathy snorted. “He loves to fish. Just not with you.”

“What?” Sam looked startled.

“He fishes when he goes on vacation. I’ve seen the pictures of him and Daniel.” Cathy took a sip from her water glass. “Deep-sea fishing.”

“You’re kidding.” Sam’s eyebrows were creeping up toward her hairline. “He refuses to fish with me.”

“That’s because you are competitive.” Alex walked into the room and kissed his wife on top of the head.

“So?” She scrunched up her nose.

“It’s not relaxing to go fishing with you. It’s a competition.” Alex sat down in an empty chair.

“That’ll be good for Marty.” I bumped him with my elbow. “He’s all about winning at things.”

“It’s on!” Sam winked at my son and he blushed.

If I’d been forced to guess what a dinner with the royal family would be like, I would have thought it would be formal, punctuated with talk about politics and serious issues. I would have been very wrong. It was as if there was an unspoken rule to leave work at the door. The only time they talked about serious issues was if it involved something they were passionate about.