Redemption Song (36 page)

“Hi, Alaina! I’m Josh’s girlfriend, Kim. Josh told me you were visiting and that I should show you around fraternity row and introduce you to some people.”

The girl’s smile was like a bright ray of sunshine and she bounced when she talked like every word was of the utmost importance. Obviously, Alaina was not the perky cheerleader type, but she’d deal with it if she had to. But first, she flashed Cam a look that said, “Oh I’m defiantly returning the favor now,” and allowed Kim to pull her off into the crowd.

Kim walked Alaina up and down the entirety of fraternity row, which ended up burning more time than Alaina would have ever thought possible. As Kim led her deeper and deeper into the extravaganza that was the world of frat, seconds turned into minutes, and minutes turned into hours. By nightfall, things were really starting to heat up on the street front.

Huge speakers had been loaded onto trailers and boomed music into the air that Alaina was sure could be heard for at least a mile. Huge jugs of liquid were cased in large metal trash cans and had a pump spout on the top that people continually walked up to fill their glasses from—their glasses being red solo cups. Alaina’s stomach churned and she realized that it was time to find Cam. The “keg” as she heard it referred to by a redheaded girl in a dress that resembled a shirt, definitely did not contain soda. And Alaina knew Cam’s history with alcohol. She’d thought he’d changed, hence the reason she’d hung out with him for so long.

Alaina thought about the cup in Cam’s chair earlier. Had he already been drinking even then? Why hadn’t he told her? Been honest with her? But then again, he hadn’t told her about rescheduling their flight or calling the hotel about their luggage. Alaina turned in circles, having lost Kim at least an hour ago, and suddenly, rage burned behind her eyes. How could Cam possibly think that she would be enjoying this? This was not an innocent social gathering where he could meet new people and hang out with the guys he would be living with. This was a party! An all out music blaring, keg drinking, dirty dancing party. Alaina looked around and as she took in the scene, she realized that she’d never felt more incredibly alone in her entire life.

There was not a single person within sight that didn’t have a solo cup in their hand. Every girl wore clothes that advertised way more than the designer labels printed on them. Each guy that she passed seemed to study her every move as if they were waiting to see if she’d be willing to offer what every other girl was offering. Couples danced in the street with their legs intertwined so to rub each other in places that made Alaina nauseous. She peered farther down the street. At the frat house to her left, a swimming pool had been constructed in the front yard and, one by one, girls were stripping down to nothing but their underwear, and diving in to meet the boys in the water. On the other side, couples laid out in the lawn, sprawled on top of each other in the grass as if no one else was around to see them.

She’d seen enough. Alaina bolted back toward Josh’s frat house. She tried to dial Cam’s number, but it went straight to his voicemail. She looked at nothing but the road and tried to keep her focus away from everything going on around her. She felt alone . . . isolated . . . dirty. Just being in the midst of the chaos of that street made her spirit feel tainted. She wanted to cry out to God to save her from this mess, but she’d held so much anger and so much bitterness for her brother’s death in the past couple of months that she rarely felt God’s presence with her anymore. Even in her morning studies, she could tell her heart wasn’t in it as it’d once been.

But that’s when the words floated into her mind. Not like a blasting intercom, but a faint whisper.

I urge you as aliens and strangers in this world to abstain from sinful desires which war against your soul.

The words came from I Peter. She’d read them only a few days ago, but, at the time, didn’t fully understand their meaning. Now, the words rang out with perfect clarity. Alaina was an alien in the world of fraternity row. She didn’t belong there. God didn’t want her there and she didn’t want to be there. She couldn’t believe it, but God had found her, even there in the midst of evil. She sent up a silent prayer of thanks and trudged forward even faster, looking everywhere for a sign of Cam. The longer she had to look, and the more she witnessed in that street, the angrier she became at him. How could he possibly think she would want to be there? Did he not know her any better than that by now? After all of the time they’d spent together and all of the talks they’d had? And why did he want to be there? She knew he’d been the partier back home for a while, but he’d changed, hadn’t he? She wondered now how true that was.

Alaina was dripping with sweat and approaching blind fury when she finally caught sight of Cam’s bright orange Hollister t-shirt he’d thrown on that morning—except the shirt was upside down, as was Cam’s entire body. Not only was Cam drinking, but he was being hoisted up by a couple of beefy frat boys, with the keg tube shoved deep inside his mouth. His eyes were closed as if every bit of his concentration was focused toward how much of the beer he could consume in the matter of a few seconds.

Alaina’s heart dropped to her feet. Not only was she madder at Cam than she’d ever been at anybody in her entire life, but at the same time, her heart shattered in a million pieces for the loss of the friend she’d made over the past couple of months. The Cam that had left her stranded two years ago was the Cam that was back now. Full fledged idiocy prevalent all over his features.

Alaina caught her breath and felt the words escape her mouth. “CAM! I need to talk to you!”

Cam’s focus was yanked from the keg tube and he looked up, his eyes meeting hers instantly. At first, his eyes portrayed guilt, but it was swiftly replaced with rage.

“Aww, close dude,” said the boy who’d been holding Cam’s right foot, “but I’m afraid I still hold the record for the night.”

Cam gave the boy a playful punch in the arm and wobbled forward. “Alaina!” he said with a huge grin, all rage washed from him eyes. When he reached her, he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her off her feet into his arms and spun her around. “I’ve missed you, baby! Where have you been all night?”

“Baby?” Alaina grabbed Cams arm and drug him to a more private spot beside the side of the house, under a big tree. “Cam what the heck are you doing! You said you weren’t going to drink and I find you mid keg stand? I’m ready to go. I want you to take me home. Now.”

Cam put his fingers under her chin and pulled his face close to hers. “Aww, you’re so cute when you’re mad.”

The smell of beer on his breath was sickening and Alaina knew instantly that he was completely wasted. Chances were Cam probably wouldn’t even remember their conversation the next day.

“I’m not playing around, Cam. I want to leave now!”

The goofy grin on Cam’s face fell. “Well, that is just . . . just too bad.” His words slurred and he struggled to speak right. “I am having . . . a fun time with my new friends. I . . . am . . . not ready to leave.”

Alaina slapped her hand to her forehead and turned around. “I can’t believe I got myself in this situation,” she thought aloud. “I am so stupid! What was I thinking?”

“You . . . you were thinking . . . that you really like to spend time with me,” Cam slurred. He moved closer toward her but she backed away. “And you were thinking that you owed me for putting up with you and your problems for so long.” Cam’s voice was a bit high pitched and didn’t convey even near the accusation that came from his words. “You were . . . were thinking that I deserve a night to have fun because I’ve had to . . . babysit you for so long just to get here.”

Alaina felt her heart quicken with his words. She knew he was totally drunk and felt that there was no better time to get the truth from the real Cam Crawford before she fell for anymore of his lies. “What do you mean just to get here?”

Cam laughed and swayed from his right foot, shooting his hand toward the brick wall of the frat house to steady his balance. “C’mon Ala . . . Alaina. Do you really think my mom . . . my mommy . . . would have ever let me come to visit the lovely . . . beautimous campus of UC . . N . . . something . . . if I hadn’t built a little . . . you know . . . trust with her first?”

Light bulbs started flashing like strobe lights in Alaina’s mind. She tried to remain calm and speak to Cam as though they were having a normal conversation so that he’d keep talking. As long as she played the game, he was too inebriated to notice something was off.

“Oh, I get it,” she said, playing her part perfectly. “You mean that you hung out with me and helped me so that your mom would think you had changed and let you come to New York.”

Cam’s face lit up. “You are so . . . smart, Alaina! See this is why . . . why you should go to college with me. See . . . I . . . I helped you get through your . . . you know . . . stuff . . .” When he said ‘stuff’ he cupped his hand around his mouth and whispered as if it was some secret. “. . . and you helped me get my campus tour. We . . . we make the perfect team!”

Cam reached his hand out to high five her, but Alaina couldn’t bring herself to play the game that well. Anger boiled in her veins. All she wanted to do was scream, “YOU USED ME YOU JERK!” But she held it in. There was no point in making a scene. But she couldn’t stand to look at Cam any longer. His face had morphed back into the one that she remembered from the first time he’d betrayed her. Nothing had changed except for the improvement in his acting skills. She couldn’t believe she’d been naïve enough to fall for his tricks this time.

“I . . . I’m going to go . . . go have some more fun, okay?” With that, Cam turned and stumbled back into the party.

Alaina felt her breath escape in a swift whoosh and all strength left her knees as she slid down the brick wall to the grass under the leafy tree.
Can this night really get any worse?,
she wondered.

Her answer came in that instant as a hand reached out under her gaze. She looked up. It was Josh.

“Hey, it’s okay. Every couple gets in fights.” His voice was smooth. Too smooth.

Alaina didn’t take his hand. She rose on her own. “We’re not a couple.” She heard the shake in her tone that she knew Josh would mistake as hurt from Cam, when it was really just blinding rage that she was internally battling to keep inside.

Josh moved a little closer to her. “Yeah, Cam told me about you guys' arrangement.” He held up quotation marks with his fingers and smiled playfully. “I thought it was pretty cool.” He reached his hand farther up and pushed her hair gently behind her ear, closing the space between them so that she was backed against the house. His tone grew deeper and seductive and he placed his lips up to her ear. “I wouldn’t mind having a friend like you, Alaina.”

Is this really happening?!
Alaina shook all over. Cam had reached an all time low. Not only had he lied to her, but he’d told all his new buddies that they had some type of friends-with-benefits arrangement worked out between them. Alaina had never felt more violated in her entire life. The most she’d ever done with a boy was the innocent kisses she’d shared with Ethan outside his grandmother’s garden.

Josh’s lips touched her ear and began to move down her neck and panic raced through Alaina’s bloodstream. She prayed loud, pleading prayers of rescue in her mind. The night couldn’t end like this. She couldn’t find out that her supposed best friend was a totally fake liar and have her innocence forcefully yanked away at the same time.

The words
Please God! Please help!
played over and over again in her mind.

Suddenly, when all hope seemed lost, her mouth opened next to Josh’s hot breaths and the words that came out didn’t even seem to be her own—as if she was having an out of body experience. Her tone was surprisingly steady, her strength returned, and as Josh was moving his hands to the skin of her torso underneath her shirt, she spoke the words that brought him to an abrupt halt.

“I think you need to go find Kim before I do.”

Josh backed away and glared into her eyes. Alaina wondered for a moment if he was going to hit her or just go back to taking advantage of her. But then, to her relief, he backed away.

“You know, Cam was right,” he said. “You are a . . .”

Alaina cringed at his last word, but all she cared about was the fact that he was gone. When Josh was completely out of sight, she did the only other thing she knew to do.

She ran.

Alaina ran as fast as she could. She dodged the dancing couples and jumped over the passed-out bodies in the street. She ran and ran and ran until a good distance separated her and fraternity row. It wasn’t until she’d almost reached the edge of campus that she finally slowed her pace to a swift walk. Tears streamed from her eyes; she was no longer able to contain them. Alaina looked to the sky above her as she reached the edge of campus and exited onto St. Nicholas Avenue. The time was nearing midnight and the sky should have been black, but the lights of the city made it glow an iridescent greenish yellow.

Alaina paused at the campus entrance and tried to regain her focus. What was she going to do now? She was stranded in the middle of New York City with no money and no place to go. She didn’t know anyone. Didn’t have anyone to call . . .

Or did she?

No, she couldn’t possibly call him after all this time. Would he even care enough anymore to come?

Alaina took one more glance up and down both sides of the dangerously dark city street. The protective crowds of people from earlier that morning were no longer there. Alaina was alone . . . she hoped. Yep, she had to call. Alaina yanked her phone out and found his number with ease. She’d almost dialed it probably a thousand times over the past year or so but had always turned back. But not this time. This time she had no choice. She just hoped that the biggest pop sensation of her decade hadn’t forgotten about her completely.

Five solid rings sounded and Alaina was about to give up on him answering when a drowsy voice came on the line.

“He . . . hello?”