Redeeming the Deception of Grace (7 page)

For a change, he looked unsure, causing
Grace
to furrow her brow in confusion
.
Just what was going on with Ewan? He had been silent for a long moment as she had vented her anger and now was giving her an expression she hadn
'
t seen on him before
: u
ncertainty
.

****

What is wrong with me
?
Seeing the sincere frustration in
Grace
'
s expression made him feel low, unworthy
,
and, well, like the rogue he was
.
Could she have a firm attachment to Shiply so quickly? Was he already too late? Was there no hope
?
Angry, he shook his head in an attempt to gather his frayed thoughts
.

What had seemed like a brilliant idea earlier was now turning his stomach sour
.
What if, in his brazen attempt at spreading his peacock feathers
,
he had ruined any chance for
Grace
to take him seriously
?
His h
ead
spun
with thoughts and unfamiliar and unwelcome emotions
.
Ewan promptly spun on his heel and left, deep in thought
.

Not until he walked into his house did he realize he hadn
'
t even said good
-
bye
—
another black mark against him
.

D
o I
dare have any hope at all?
h
e
wondered
as he reached for his
b
randy and took a long
,
deep drink
,
hoping to
lose
his emotional self in the amber liquid.

****

Exasperated,
Grace
flung herself onto the settee after she heard the door close
after
Ewan
'
s abrupt exit
.
Her s
tomach
was
in knots
.
S
he breathed as deeply as her corset would allow and wished she were a man so it would be proper to drink something stronger than sherry
.

Closing her eyes
,
she gathered her self-control and fought for balance
.
Did Ewan have any idea of the effect he had on her?
She hoped not, yet a part of her still tried to hope that maybe, just maybe
,
Ewan was beginning to see her as more than the ann
oying little girl of the past.

"
Dear, what posture!
"
her
mother scolded
as she entered the room
,
bringing the scent of lemon and lavender with her.

M
ildly repentant,
Grace
straightened her posture so she once again looked the part of a lady
.

"
I take it your
walk
in the park was not as grand as you had hoped?
"
Lady Jarvais
asked as she walked over to her daughter and sat next to her, gently touching her shoulder.

"
You could say that.
"
Grace
'
s posture relaxed ever so slightly at her mother
'
s touch
,
feeling a bit of the tension release from her body.

"
Why? I trust Shiply was a gentleman?
"
Lady Jarvais
gently prodded
.

"
Oh, Shiply was indeed a gentleman
.
He
was not the issue
.
He was polite, full of humor and delightful to converse with on our walk
,
"
Grace
explained with exasperated tones as she picked at her dress with her dainty gloved fingers, not meeting her mother
'
s affectionate gaze.

"
So?
"
Lady Jarvais
asked,
reaching up to tilt her daughter
'
s chin up.

"
So, I
…
"
She paused, looking at her mother.
"
Why?
Why did you ask Ewan
,
or he ask you
…
"
She sighed.
"
It
doesn
'
t matter. What does matter is why
?
Why Ewan
,
Mother? You know what he does to me. Truly, he tries my patience in every way imaginable and exasperates me beyond all recovery!
"
Grace
'
s voice rose as she completed her question with more aggression than she had begun
.
S
he searched her mother
'
s face.

"
Sweetheart
,
"
Lady Jarvais
began, caressing
Grace
'
s hand with her own.
"
I know Ewan has his faults
,
but I believe this situation is for the best. After all, he has your best inte
rest
s at heart.
"

Grace
wasn
'
t so sure of her mother
'
s answer
.
When it was apparent that her mother didn
'
t intend to elaborate,
Grace
opened her mouth to ask another question
, but
her mother
'
s gently raised hand silenced her.

"
I know you wanted more, but you
'
ll have to trust me
,
love
.
Remember
:
I know you better than you know yourself.
"
After giving
a gentle caress over her daughter
'
s face
,
she rose and left.

C
hapter Five

"
For the love of…
"
His words
trailed
off as he tried to rise from his uncomfortable position on the chair in his study
.
Ewan
'
s head pounded as he
tried to pinpoint the reason for waking up
in the first place
. As he tried to open his eyes
,
he squinted against the light that intensified his headache and fell back into the chair with a grunt.

"
Sir
,
i
f I may suggest? You may want to rise and
,
er, shine.
"
With a dry cough that was a pathetic effort to cover a laugh
,
his
butler
,
Whit
,
entered the study
.
Even though Ewan couldn
'
t see, he could hear the
giant
'
s
footfalls
;
most of Mayfair likely could
.

"
Whit, have I threatened to fire you yet today?
"
Ewan asked, his eyes still closed
,
but
he massaged
his temples as he tried to grant himself momentary relief from the pain.

"
No
,
sir
.
I doubt you
'
ve done much of anything today
.
"
His
reply
was accentuated by another cough
-
laugh.

"
You
'
re fired
,
"
Ewan mumbled, not wanting to speak
too
loudly and cause his head to explode.

"
I see
.
T
hen
I
'
ll just head back to the missus and leave you to ready yourself for the Lordington
'
s ball tonight
.
Alone
.
Without m
y help
.
"
Whit
paused for effect.
"
How do you think you
'
ll tie your cravat
without
opening your eyes? Maybe you
'
ll start a new trend
?
And I suppose you
'
ll fix your own tonic to relieve the pain threatening to split your skull as well. Brilliant.
Cheerio
.
I
'
m off. Have a lovely evening.
"
Loud footfalls echoed as Whit began to retreat into the hall.

After a huff, which caused Ewan
'
s head to increase
its
pounding for a moment, he
mumbled,
"
I will not be in attendance.
"

"
Excuse me sir? What did you say?
"
Whit asked.

"
I said
…
"
Ewan raised his voice,
but pain made him
immediately grab his head and lower his tone once again.
"
I
'
m not going
,
"
h
e all but whispered
.

Ewan
'
s irritation rose as he noticed that Whit was chuckling
.
He had done
that
on purpose!

"
You
'
re lucky I
'
m not able to beat you right now
,
"
Ewan whispered menacing
ly
.

"
Ah well, since I
'
m relieved of my employment here
,
I
'
ll just take my leave before you
'
r
e
able to attempt any physical harm on my person.
"
Whit
took a step then paused
.
"
But, I feel compelled to mention a certain young miss will be left to her own
devices
…
and
the devices of others…
"
Whit drew out the last sentence before walking away once again
.

The sound of receding footsteps caused a momentary panic to rise in Ewan
.

"
Wait!
"
h
e shouted, immediately regretting the rash action
.
He had to start thinking before he acted!

"
Yes
,
sir?
"
The footsteps halted, causing Ewan to relax slightly before speaking once again, only much softer.

"
I re-hire you. Now, go and fix me that vile concoction
.
"
Ewan continued to massage his temples and mumbled,
"
I swear it
'
s poison.
"

"
No
,
sir
. Poison
is the reason you
'
r
e
in this condition
,
"
Whit remarked wry
ly
.

"
Brandy is not poison
,
"
Ewan argued,
but
his body
told
him otherwise.

"
Large quantities of anything can be poison
,
"
Whit replied, earning a sarcastic huff from Ewan.

"
D
o
n
'
t you have a job to do
?
"
Ewan asked, annoyed, still not willing to move from his position on the chair
.

"
As you wish
,
sir
.
I
'
ll be back in a moment
.
Try not to pass out or worse while I
'
m gone.
"
With a clear
ing
of his throat, Whit once again began to leave.

"
I thank you for your genuine concern
for
me
,
"
Ewan replied sarcastically.

"
Always a pleasure
,
sir.
"
And with that
,
Whit
left
Ewan alone with the tiny hammers attempting to pulverize his head
.

****

All last night
,
Ewan had tried to make sense of the well of emotion that was bursting within him
.
He was a rake, a rogue
,
and therefore not accustomed to dealing with emotions, especially his own
.
No, when emotions were involved, he usually removed himself or drank, often both
.
But last night
,
no amount of brandy was
enough
to eliminate the stirring caused whenever he thought of
Grace
.
I
f anything
,
it intensified his desire.

What was it about her
,
and why had it happened now? Why not earlier? Hadn
'
t he known
Grace
for years? Ever since she was in leading strings
,
he had been there, torturing her the entire way and loving every moment of it
.
He paused a
t
the thought of the last sentence
.
He loved torturing her, teasing her
—
loved
.

Could that be the root? Was it nothing more than his fear in
losing
his constant playmate in verbal sparring? He thought about it, mulled it over
,
and
realized
that though the joy attained from besting her and teasing her mercilessly was indeed profound, his emotions went far beyond
just that
.

As he thought about her smile, her constant efforts to put him in place and ignore all charm he use
d
on her
,
he felt himself smile
—
a sappy sort of grin he often pitied when seen on others
.
He closed his eyes and ran his fingers down his face
,
feeling the friction of his stubble. He must look frightening
.
And tonight he had to go see Shiply charm
Grace
all over again
.

The
thought of Shiply
dissolved
the grin from his face and
replaced it with
a grimace.
A bit more than disgusted with himself, he
groan
ed and
leaned back on the chair
, closing
his eyes.

As much as he hated the thought, he needed someone to talk with, someone who could help him sort everything out
.
A
silent fortifying breath
later,
he rose from the chair and held it for support as he gained his bearings
.

H
e walked out into the hall toward his room
and
bellowed,
"
Whit!
"

He
promptly regretted
yelling
.
M
aybe
the splitting headache would simply kill him
,
and he
'
d no longer have to deal with the harrowing emotions one
gain
ed
when find
ing
himself
in love.

The
hitch in his chest
made him realize the truth of
the word he had just
confessed in
his own mind
.

He was in love with
Grace
.

Of all the rotten things to happen to him
!
Love
Grace
! He might as well allow the brandy to continue
its
slow attempt at poisoning him
.
He had no chance to win her
affections
, did he
?
Leaning against the wall he
rested
his head against the cool wood and closed his eyes
.

What a mess.

As he saw it, there were only two options
.
One was to win her affections, something he had never succeeded at in the past
;
although
,
to be honest
,
he had never tried
.
However, the fact remained that
Grace
was immune to his charm
,
and he was concerned that charm was all he possessed to woo her
.
Oh, he knew he was handsome and proficient in romancing the fairer sex
,
but
Grace
was different
,
because she wouldn
'
t be impressed
.
She never had been
.

The only other option was to give up, let Shiply or someone else win
,
and resign himself to watching her belong to someone else
.
The thought made his blood run cold
.

No, that was not an option
.

Which left the first
.
He must win
Grace
'
s affections
.