Recovery (4 page)

“O, you don’t make any sense, honey.”

“It was like I had the old Max back, he was witty and gentle, and his lips were so soft I never wanted to stop kissing him, but I had to—”

“You kissed him! What were you thinking, Oceane! You can’t give him false hope. I love Max as if he was my own brother, but he’s in a bad place right now and if you let him he’ll drag you down with him.”

“And if I turn him away and he winds up dead? I could never live with myself if that happened. Hell, I barley deal as it is.”

“We’ve talked about this, none of this is your fault and you can’t make him do anything until he’s ready, petite soeur.”

It was a piece of advice she had heard so many times she wanted to run away screaming when the phrase was uttered. It made her feel helpless. The Dubois women were not people who waited around for things to happen.

“I know, Aurelie, I really do, none of this was my fault and there was nothing I could do to prevent what’s happened. I’ve read the books and attended the meetings. I get it.”

“I realize this is hard for you Oceane, but you’re not alone, he knows he has me, Maman and Pere. We worry about you. Since things went south you are like a shadow of who you used to be.”

“He’s
monautre moite
, my other half, I can’t be okay if he isn’t.”

“Sweetheart, you may have to be.”

The sadness laced in her sister’s voice settled onto her chest like a weight.

The last thing she wanted to be was a burden. Her behavior had undergone a radical change, but what she allowed her friends and family to see was nothing compared to what she felt inside. Colors seemed muted with her love gone, food tasted less favorable and loneliness dogged her at every step.

“I’m sorry I called you like this, I know it’s late and you have to be in the office early.”

“You know I’m always here whenever you need me.”

“I know, Aurelie. I love you.”

“I love you, too, petite soeur. Now get some rest.”

“I will, Aur, good night.”

“Night.”

Alone in her bed, O lay back watching the dancing shadows the flickering candles cast on the wall. The scent of lavender and vanilla weren’t enough to chase away her stress this time. She pulled the navy blue blanket with white stars closer to her body, easing down to lay on her back. Her only consolation was the knowing he was at home working feverishly on music in his apartment. Oceane rolled on to her side, reaching inside the drawer for the velvet case she kept in her nightstand.

It opened smoothly and she eyed the white gold band adorned with white diamonds. At the heart of the ring was a large pink diamond surrounded by a cluster of white. Pink was her favorite color, and the ring had a
jen ne sasi quoi
that made you think of eternal love and days gone by. It was the perfect design for her and what she thought would be a start to a life as man and wife. She placed the band on her left ring finger and twisting it around as her brain raced. Perhaps Aur was right; maybe it was time to take a step back from the situation.

She balked at the idea, but her heart was often known to cloud her vision. She took after her free-spirited mother whom her father had met when she was a singer in a jazz club. Aurelie was a miniature of their Father with her mind for business, strong angular jaw and French temperament. This placed the girls on opposite ends of the spectrum; fortunately, they balanced each other out. With only a year between them the ying yang effect had made them extremely close.

Even with their closeness, Aur didn’t understand the depths of her depression since she and Maxim separated. He was the one person other than her Mother who didn’t judge her for the life she led. Her father owned a very successful firm and didn’t understand why his youngest daughter had no desire to follow in his footsteps. Never mind the fact that their mother had been a jazz singer when they met.

Maxim always made a point of being a shield when they were with family. He used his charm and light-hearted words to steer the serious conversation away from her. She’d grown attached to that. They’d both been outcasts in their own family when they met. It had been one of the reasons that created an almost instant bond between them as they become their own family.  It was this connection she missed most. She rose from the bed, wrapping the blankets around her as she went to sit on her window seat and stare out into the night. Sleep would be a long time coming tonight.

****

Aurelie leaned back at her desk unable to concentrate on the H.R. reports she needed to complete. The memory of the hurt in O’s voice had been haunting her for the past few weeks. She deserved so much more than Max was delivering. The jackass hadn’t returned since that night and it had been driving O crazy. Pursing her full lips, she tapped her fountain pen against her teeth and wracked her brain for ideas. She needed to pull her little sister out of her funk. Maybe all she needed was to know she had more options than Max.

The two had been together so long it was like they had become entwined. Two souls that shared the same heartbeat. Once, it had been a beautiful thing to witness. Now, it had turned into a twisted codependency. Her bright green eyes narrowed as a plan began to form then sputtered out. Frustrated, she threw her pen down in disgust and rose, standing on her black Christian Louboutin heels. She slipped her scarlet Christian Dior purse over her shoulder and headed out of the office.

Aurelie believed you should work hard so you could play hard. For her that meant designer labels. The one thing she’d always had in addition to a mind for business was an eye for fashion. Her job at Dubois Incorporated allowed her to indulge both. Not that being the boss’s daughter meant she had it easy. More often than not it meant working three times harder to prove to everyone she deserved to be there. It was a motivation she used to fuel her hunger to be the best she could be. The sounds of her heels were muffled on the navy carpet as she headed out of her office.

“Laura, I’m taking lunch,” she told her secretary. This dilemma was too big for her alone. She needed to call in reinforcements. Once she was outside she pulled the sleek, black android phone out of her purse, calling her best friend.

“Henri, mon amour.”

“Hello my love.”

“Can you talk?”

“Yes, luckily for you, I’m in between clients,” Henri said “You just buttered me up like a roll, so tell me what you want,” he said, his voice full of mirth. “Do you need me to tame that mane of yours?”

“My hair is just fine, thank you.”

“Mmhmm.”

“Henri!”

His laughter came over the phone in waves as she made her way to the local deli. She’d met Henri years ago when she’d gone into a salon that had been recommended and it had been love at first style. They’d exchanged numbers and the rest was history. If Henri had liked ladies, she’d have married him in a heartbeat.

“So tell me, petite, if this isn’t for an emergency appointment why are you calling me before eleven?”

“Oceane.”

“Is she okay?”

“Physically, yes, but mentally the girl’s a hot mess.”

“Max still can’t get it together can he?”

“No, and it’s taken its toll on her. She’s so somber, holing up in that apartment like a hermit. If we didn’t have family dinners I’d doubt she’d venture outside of those four walls much.” Her sister did freelance writing to keep a steady income, with song writing and poetry to feed her soul. Though to be fair the things she loved had begun bringing in more than her  “day job”.

“Our little sunbeam needs a night out with some fabulous friends, and by fabulous I mean us.”

“My thoughts exactly! This is why we’re best friends, Henri.”

“Great minds do think alike. We should go to the new jazz bar, Dizzy’s.  I’ve heard nothing but good things about it and you know our little nightingale would love it.”

“Perfect!”

“Why do I sense a ‘but’?”

“There was another area I needed your expertise in.”

“Oh, this I don’t like the sound of.”

“I need you to provide an eligible bachelor who’s all the things Max isn’t.”

“You know she’s nowhere near ready for that.”

“It doesn’t have to be serious, Henri, I just want to show her what she’s missed and that life after Max is possible.”

“I’ll do it, but you’re going to owe me if I’m going to face her wrath.”

“O’s wrath?”

“You Dubois woman are crazy honey, I don’t know what she’s going to do, and unlike you, she doesn’t have that French pension for privacy to keep her in line.”

“What do you want?”

“I want you to go with me to the black and white movie marathon next week at the Regal.”

“Fine, can you set things up for this weekend?”

“Friday night?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Great, I’ll call you tonight to work out the details.”

“Talk to you then, Henri.”

A brilliant smile broke over her face as she took her sandwich, yogurt and bottled water to the register. A million times lighter now than when she’d entered, she opted to eat outside.

“Keep the change,” she told the clerk, heading to the tables that lined the deli with a spring in her step.

“You’re not going to leave me alone until I agree to this are you?” Oceane asked. When Aurelie shook her head no, she laughed. At least she was honest. She’d been hounding her for the past week about going out tonight.

“Okay, where is it you want me to go?”

The sight of her sister’s wide grin was almost enough to make up for the aggravation she knew would follow.

“To the new jazz bar that opened.”

“Dizzy’s?” she asked. This might not be too bad after all.

“Yes, Henri says it’s wonderful.”                 

“If he speaks highly of it I’m sure it is. He always knows the best spots.”

“That’s because he’s fabulous, thank you very much,” Aurelie said, her exaggerated accent the perfect imitation of their feisty friend. Unlike them, Henri had lived in France for most of his life until his parents made the move across the ocean to start up a new chain of hair salons in the states. Henri was the epitome of tall dark and handsome. His lean frame stood six feet two inches high and his olive skin set off his wavy chocolate brown hair and arresting blue gems. His almost androgynous face was delicate with high cheek bones and a set of cupid’s bow pink lips. Unready to settle down, Henri often played the field, but his kind spirit and huge heart managed to turn ex-boyfriends into friends.

“Now that you’ve thrown Henri and jazz music into the mix, I’m actually looking forward to this.”

“Good, then you won’t mind doing a little shopping then.”

“Aur—you totally set me up.”

“Come on, we can make it a girls day, we’ll do mani-pedis , shop for outfits and buy food  that tastes divine because its loaded with calories.”

“Okay, I’m sold; you can stop your sales pitch,” Oceane said, her stomach grumbling. “I would never want to go up against you in the corporate world Aur, you’re a shark.”

“That’s why they pay me the big bucks at Dubois Inc.”

Aurelie’s sing song voice made her laugh as she shook her head.

“People have no clue what a funny sister I have.”

“You know I like to keep my work and my home life separate.”

“Yes, I know you have French sensibilities even though you deny.”

“You have hippie tendencies.”

“I know.”

“Ugh, you can be so annoying sometimes,” Aurelie said as they stood and Oceane laughed. No matter how old they got it amused her when she got under her sister’s skin. She was so cool, calm and collected. It was nice to ruffle her feathers every now and then.

“Come on,
insectenuisible
, grab your purse and I’ll drive.”

“I’m not a pest,” Oceane said, grabbing her black purse and her keys off the counter as they headed out.
“I beg to differ,” Aurelie mumbled in response.

“I heard that!”

“Good!” Auerlie cried, giving her a playful shove and ran for the door.

“It’s been way too long since we did this,” said Oceane, purring as the decadent frosting and cinnamon from her pastry exploded onto her taste buds.

“I want to take that as a compliment, but I think it’s the cinnamon roll talking.”

“I’d say fifty-fifty.”

“Well, at least I can take half the credit,” she replied as they both giggled. They finished the rest of their treats between playful banter and headed to the department store.

Three hours later they left the mall with two new outfits and new makeup.  The sleeveless black sheath with the asymmetrical neckline was fierce, but Oceane never would have justified spending three hundred dollars on a single article of clothing. Aurelie had purchased it along with her own choice, a strapless pleated blue and green dress with a sweetheart neckline. She’d called it a gift and O had learned long ago arguments with her sister were pointless. You’d always lose.

“I was reluctant to come out, but I have to admit, I feel refreshed,” Oceane said.

“You need to take better care of yourself, O. We used to do this twice a month. I’d like to go back to that.”

“Me, too,” she said as she took another step towards a life outside of limbo.

They were in the car when the ring tone
Ring of Fire
chimed and she froze.

“Are you going to answer?” Aurelie asked.

“No, tonight is about fun. I won’t let Max ruin that.”

“I’m proud of you,
petite soeur
.”

* * * *

Max frowned as he pressed the end button on his cell. His call had gone to voice mail. It was almost six in the evening, what could she be doing? Tapping his slender fingers against the couch cushion, he waited for her to call him back. Perhaps she’d been in the bathroom or she hadn’t heard her phone go off. His leg bounced as the minutes continued to tick by and his phone remained silent. Had she finally had her fill? Twenty minutes later he’d damn near worn a hole in the carpet. Should he allow her to have her space or go over to her apartment? He’d finished his last two tracks a few days earlier and he hadn’t taken any drugs since. He wanted to call her to celebrate and make her proud. He’d wait a few hours then he’d call again.