Real Vampires Don't Wear Size Six (26 page)

“Why? I hear Lacy coming up the stairs.” Penny looked puzzled.

I grabbed Lacy’s arm and jerked her inside, then slammed the door. “Okay, Lacy. Why don’t you tell my roomie why you’re so crazy about white rats? Why your whole family loves them?”

Lacy grimaced and glanced down at my hand on her arm. I let her go, but stayed in her face. She and I both knew that in a fair fight she could probably take me. She was a werecat who had some serious skills and I’m too softhearted to rip out the throat of someone I consider a friend. Lacy? I wasn’t so sure she wouldn’t get caught up in the moment and claw me to pieces. Her real disadvantage was that she worked for me as my day manager and beating up your boss didn’t translate to job security. On the other hand, finding good reliable day help wasn’t easy either. It was a standoff.

“Lacy? Is something up here?” Penny had quickly figured out that her rats weren’t exactly going to a happy home.

“Oh, well, sorry I didn’t tell you the truth.” Lacy backed toward the door. “I’m, um, a werecat.” She smiled and let her canines show. “White rats. To be honest? They’re absolutely delicious.”

“Oh, my God!” Penny clutched a cage to her chest. “You didn’t—You haven’t—”

“Relax. The tasty treats are still in the station wagon, waiting for Mom’s secret sauce.” Lacy winced when I kicked her in the shin. “I’ll go get ’em.”

“No. Stay here. Where Glory can watch you.” Penny held out her hand. “Give me your keys.”

“Car’s not locked. Who’s going to steal rats? Any other werecats in the area are, er,
were
invited to the barbeque.” She sighed. “It’s the red station wagon out back. Just wish I hadn’t called Mom first. She’s already fired up the grill and called the cousins.”

“Ewww.” Penny lurched out of the apartment holding her stomach.

“Really? Was that last necessary?” I frowned and grabbed Boogie before he could make a dash for freedom through the open door. “If you value your job, I suggest you disappear before Penny gets back up here, Lacy.” I showed fang. “I’m not happy with you right now.”

“It’s my nature, Glory.” Lacy shrugged and reached out to give Boogie a scratch under his chin. His purr was epic. “The newbie’s gonna have to learn to deal.”

“Lacy . . .” I really did need her at the shop or she’d have been fired on the spot. But what she said was true.

“Now if she ever wants to get rid of this sweet fella, he’d be treated like a king at Mom’s place.” She scratched him again and he closed his eyes in ecstasy.

“Get your freaky claws off my cat!” Penny had a cage in each hand as she shoved Lacy out of her way. The rats scrambled into a trembling pile, as far away from the werecat as they could get. “I’m doing a head count. If even one rat is missing . . .”

“Chill, vamp child. Like I said, Mom makes a secret sauce. It’s killer.” Lacy put up her hands when Penny dropped the cages and lunged at her. I jumped in between them.

“Stop! Penny, take care of your rats. Lacy, don’t taunt her. Please?” I sent my manager a mental message to work with me here.

“Yeah, well, good luck, Glory. You’d better teach your gal here not to make idle threats.”

Penny was right behind me, her fangs bared. “You want to try me?”

“No one’s trying anyone. Good night, Lacy. Say hi to your mom for me.” I looked back and gave Penny a mental message to chill.

“Sure. I’m outta here.” Lacy held up her hands. “But now I’ve got to stop and pick up something else.” She eyed the crates wistfully. “Salmon. Guess Mom can grill that.” Lacy glanced at me. “Course these would have been free.”

In the interest of harmony, I grabbed my purse and handed her a couple of twenties.

“Thanks, boss!” Lacy smirked at Penny and sauntered out the door.

I closed it, then leaned against it, hugging Boogie who was struggling to get to the rats.

Penny glared at me. “I can’t believe that woman! And you gave her money?”

“She works for me and lives across the hall. It’s important that we all get along.” I stroked the cat. “And she would have mopped the floor with you, fledgling. Believe that.”

“Humph.” Penny took a minute to calm down and think that through. “But I’ll get stronger as I get older.”

“Sure you will. But each species of paranormal has its own skill set. There’s lots to learn in this new world of yours. Werecats, werewolves, you name it, shape-shifters of all kinds exist and live in this building, Penny, along with other vampires. You should call Trey. Get him to help you identify the different kinds of paranormals by smell like he offered at N-V. And let him teach you some other things too, whatever he’s willing to share.” I glanced at the door. “That scent thing would have sure helped you tonight.”

“You’re right about that.” Penny picked up two crates and started toward her bedroom. “You think that he meant it? That I could call him?”

“Sure. There aren’t a lot of young, cute paranormals available. Trey was happy to see a new girl in town.”

Penny stopped. “Oh. I get it. Supply and demand.”

“I didn’t mean to insult you. I’m stating a fact. Didn’t you hear the cute part?” I let Boogie down, shutting him inside my bedroom. “Take advantage of the situation. And I have no problem with you dating a shifter. He can handle you if your bloodlust becomes an issue.”

“Oh, yeah? What? Will he let me drink his blood?” She moved closer. “Have you had some of Rafe’s? Would I like shifter blood?”

“Okay. First, let’s not get personal. Second?” I thought about Rafe and his blood, so hot, so, um, delicious. I shook my head. “Yes, you’d like it. Shifters have a very fast metabolism; They have to in order to shift. So their blood is hot and, in my experience, pretty fine.” I smiled. “But they have different types just like mortals do. With any kind of luck you’ll live a long, long while. Plenty of time to try them all.”

“So vampire blood . . . ?” Penny forgot about the rats for a minute.

“Is fairly cool, temperature-wise. And you already sampled the mortal kind. It’s warm. So the shifter’s feels hot in comparison.” I sighed, remembering. I’d really miss that. But I just couldn’t go there again.

“Interesting.” Penny picked up her crates again. “Yes, I’ll call him. I can’t do research with the lab closed and an investigation going on. I texted Jenny that Ray wasn’t here now so she’s calmed down.”

“You’re not a suspect, are you? In the great lab rat heist?” I picked up the other crates and followed her to her bedroom. Phew. These guys had to go soon because it definitely reeked in here.

“No, my research was trashed by the theft. I’d be the last person they’d look at. So far it’s a dead end.” Penny clipped food and water trays to the crates and arranged paper and litter as it should be. “Poor babies. What a close call. I definitely need to know a werecat when I smell one.”

“Yes, you do. And, seriously, don’t blame Lacy. She needs prey, as you would if you didn’t have the synthetic blood available. Neither of you can help what you need to live.”

“I wonder. I’d like to run a chemical analysis on our DNA, among other things. The genetic changes since I’ve been turned vampire. The whole thing is fascinating. Our metabolism. You name it. Since my old research isn’t satisfying me anymore, I figure I need to move on to something new.” Penny opened her window, turned on a fan, and shut the bedroom door. She led the way to the living room. “Ray texted me. Ian MacDonald is here and will meet with me later tonight. I’m definitely going. I think I’d like to work with him.”

I sank down on the couch. Of course I knew Ian was here. I’d talked to him at length about Ray’s rehab. For once, I felt in sync with the Scottish doctor, though I hadn’t shared that information with Jerry. My Campbell still had the MacDonald prejudice and couldn’t see past an old feud.

“Oh, Penny, you have no idea what you’d be getting into with Ian. As much as I respect his brilliant mind, he has a pretty unique perspective on science. Instead of lab rats, Ian experiments with mortals and other vampires.”

“That’s radical.” But instead of being horrified, Penny looked intrigued. “Not good that he uses mortals, though I can see he’d need blood samples for comparison. But the vampires are immortal, so how could he hurt them?”

I threw up my hands. “We’re talking about people, Penny. Vampires are still human, my dear. And you’re not going near Ian MacDonald without me.”

Penny smiled. “Great. I admit I was a little scared about it. You and Mr. Blade keep throwing out dire warnings, though Ray thinks Ian’s cool.”

It didn’t escape me that Penny was still calling Jerry “Mr. Blade” but had gone to “Ray” immediately.

“What time is this meeting? And how are you supposed to get there? Are you driving? The paparazzi are still camped outside, you know. Though they won’t bother you, I don’t think.” They’d gotten shots of Ray leaving in his SUV out back. Some still followed me every time I left the apartment. They’d got a swell shot of me with a wet head after our visit to the beauty shop tonight. I kept hoping they’d give up. Business was still booming, though, which was why I really needed to get down to the shop.

“I’m meeting them at three.” Penny sighed. “I guess I’m getting used to these crazy new hours. I didn’t think twice when Ray told me that. The meeting’s at his house on the lake and he said it was hard to find so he’s sending a car for me before then.”

“True. You’re adapting very quickly.” I gave her an encouraging smile. We were settled on the couch in my newly refurnished living room. The chairs were a beautiful caramel leather and the coffee table was a sturdy black enamel that could hold a man if he landed on it. My favorite new addition was the lamp. It was an Oriental ginger jar decorated with a red, caramel and black dragon design. I was grabbing it at the first sign of trouble next time. I figured Jerry had called a high-end furniture store and had a decorator pick these things. The only problem was that it made my thrift store couch look pretty sad. I was going to have to at least splurge on a new throw and some pillows.

I was about to comment on it when Penny’s phone rang.

“It’s my mom. She’s been leaving messages. She wants to come check on me, especially after I told her about the rats being stolen and my research trashed.” Penny kept staring at the phone.

“Answer it. We’ll figure something out.” I leaned back. Obviously I was going to be really late to the shop.

“Hey, Mom. Sorry I missed your other calls.”

“Penny, why didn’t you tell me you were moving?” Penny’s mother had none of the Texas drawl I expected as I leaned close to listen in. I guess she was a Yankee transplant as they called them around here.

“It was kind of spur-of-the-moment. Glory and I clicked and she needed a roommate. It was a good deal for me.” Penny rolled her eyes.

“Well, Daddy and I want to come up and meet her, see the new place.” Mom obviously wasn’t taking no for an answer. “How about Saturday? I’ll bring a pot roast and we’ll have lunch. I know how you miss my home cooking, honey. Jenny can come too.”

“Sounds just wonderful, but that’s not good for me.” Penny heaved a big sigh that I was sure her mother could hear. “Still trying to deal with the mess at the lab and I have a big date Saturday night. I’ll have to get ready.”

“A date!” Mom was excited now. “Of course. Take all the time you need. Jenny could help you with that.”

“Yeah, right.” Penny looked at me. “Actually Glory has a clothing shop. She’s been super helping me with my wardrobe. You won’t recognize me when you see me. I’m totally transformed. Even got a haircut.”

“That settles it. We’re coming. Name the day. I mean it.” Mom sounded firm.

I grabbed the phone. “Hi, Mrs. Patterson? This is Glory St. Clair, Penny’s new roommate.”

“Glory? Well, I’m glad to meet you. I hope Penny isn’t making a mess in your place.” Mom laughed. “She does have her mind on other things.”

“I’m enjoying having Penny here. And she keeps her stuff in her room except for that big computer. But I’m sure you know how important her research was to her.” I listened while Mom lamented about the lost research.

“Well, why don’t you and Mr. Patterson come on up this Monday night? My shop’s closed and Penny and I can have you here then. In the apartment.” I laughed at the look on Penny’s face. Obviously I’d just given her a deadline for having the rats gone and the place aired out.

“Oh, I love pot roast. With potatoes and carrots? Bring it on. I can’t tell you the last time I had a home-cooked meal.” I sighed. I couldn’t have meant a statement more. “Yes, I’ll make sure Penny calls her sister and gets her to come too. Penny says she’s a vegetarian. Guess you know that, though. More pot roast for me.” I laughed. “See you Monday.” I hung up and faced Penny’s glare.

“My parents are coming here? Monday night?” She looked significantly toward her bedroom. “What am I supposed to do about them?”

“Find them a home. Pronto.” I got up and went to grab my purse.

“And how are we supposed to eat pot roast?” Penny was on my heels as I headed to my bedroom.

“We don’t. We whammy the entire family to make them think we did.” I picked up my brush and finished fixing my hair.

“Damn it, Glory.” Her eyes filled with tears. “That seems so creepy and like cheating.”

“What do you want to do? Show them your fangs?” I put down the brush. “You want creepy? Mom and Dad would absolutely die. Maybe literally. I don’t know what kind of shape they’re in or how old they are, but . . .”

“Dad’s had a few heart issues.” Penny frowned. “Mom’s in great shape. They’re both teachers. Dad teaches math but Mom’s sponsor of the cheerleading squad and coaches soccer. You can imagine what a disappointment to her I was. I’m not into sports.”

“But I bet you’re Daddy’s little girl.” I patted her shoulder. “Get over this. We’ll handle it. Since your computer is on our table, we’ll set up TV trays and pretend to eat. Figure something out.” I was getting really tired of all these complications.