Raging Star (25 page)

I bring my clenched fist to my heart. I spread my first two fingers in a V. Freedom, brother, I says softly.

Raw hunger spikes his eyes. Like a spark to a wick. His fist loosens. His lips part. Ohmigawd, he’s gonna do it. He’s gonna say it.
Say it. Go on. Freedom
. In the sky overhead, a star dashes itself to darkness. Hope sighs across his face an slips back in the shadows.

I says, The Pathfinder ain’t what he says he is.

They really shouldn’t let him out on his own. His face gives away his every thought. He knows he shouldn’t believe such as me. But. He folds my words very small an tucks ’em away somewhere secret. To take out an ponder on later. I won’t tell on you, he says. I promise.

Then he scarpers. Scrambles up the rocks an outta the gully, racin to git back to the babyhouse before they wonder what’s takin him so long.

An Jack’s slippin out from behind the boulder an scramblin down to help me up the slope. Possibilities brew in the gleam of his eyes. Huddle in the corners of his smile. As he gives me his hand, he says, Well.

As I take it, I says, Well, well.

My hands was sure itchin fer a gun, he says. That turned out innerestin, though.

Let’s hope there’s plenty like him, I says. The baby starts to grizzle agin. You take her, I says. I ain’t good with babies.

Jack makes a sling around hisself with the ends of the sheema. Then, with the baby held snug aginst his chest, we head off at a fast trot north across the scrubland. To where Mercy an Cassie wait fer us. Where the north road takes a first bend.

Past curfew. Dead night. The stars rampage the sky. An all is quiet in Sector Three. Besides us, there ain’t nobody afoot. The chill wind swings restless between north an east. My skin shivers. Maybe it’s a fallen soul passin by. People believe that on starfall nights, they hitch rides on the back of the wind to wherever it is they’re goin.

A wildcat on a field prowl fer mice pauses. Head high, he sniffs us, ever hopeful of a bigger meal. Then he carries on. The likes of him would easily take a baby left out in the open. She’s asleep now, thanks to Tam’s gentle jog an Mercy’s heartbeat. She’s cradled snugly in the sheema, tied around Mercy’s chest.

The air whispers of winter soon to come. It mumbles the musty corn stubble back into earth. Murmurs on the tips of our noses an fingers. This’ll be the first winter of my life that I ain’t spent at Silverlake. If I last that long, that is. If I don’t slip up fer DeMalo to crush me. But if I’m crushed, so will my people be. I look at the moon. It seems to grow fatter by the second.

I whisper to Cassie, How long away d’you figger the blood moon to be?

She says, Countin tonight? I’d say … five nights from now.

Jack hears me an frowns. I keep askin. Like time might be turnin backwards somehow. I gotta stop. He’ll be wonderin why I need to know.

All’s quiet at Rae’s farmstead, like the land that surrounds
it. The Tonton would of dropped her off an turned right around agin. Her an her boy—called Noble—farm ten acres. There’s a sod an junk cabin an two rackety sheds. The tall wind pointer tacks to an fro with a metal click-click-click. Accordin to Cassie, their nearest neighbours ain’t jest well outta sight but they’ll be well outta hearin distance too. A baby’s cry won’t be heard.

Light bleeds out from unner the cabin door. Inside, a girl’s cryin. Loud, body-wracked, heartbroke sobs. Here, with only her boy as witness, it’s safe fer Rae to crack. The ugly sound of her pain warms hope in me.

Jack’s keepin well outta sight. The fewer people who know about him, the better. Fer now, me an Mercy hang back in the shadows too.

Hermes tosses his head. His feet shift a restless demand to gallop. He longs to run flat-out over distance, across endless plains with big skies above. That’s what he was born to. Not this closed-in land. Not this walkin in shadow edges, pickin through trees, this way, that way, around an back agin.

Yes yes, my dearie, I know, I know. Not long now to wait, my heart
.

My hands soothe him, promise him. Come what may, he’ll have his freedom. I’ll make sure he ain’t slave to no Tonton.

Cassie stands at the door with the baby in her arms, wrapped in the Tonton’s sheema. My belly’s twisted. My
mouth’s dry. Mercy squeezes my shoulder. My eyes meet Jack’s. We’re takin a big chance here. Much bigger’n we did at the gully. It ain’t jest that I’ll be proved right or wrong. Cassie’s riskin her life. Liftin her mask. Obedient no more.

She straightens her back. Raises her head. She takes one deep breath an she knocks. Her gentle tap barely sounds on the heavy slab of wood.

Who is it? A man’s voice raises from inside. Unwelcome. Suspicious.

Noble, it’s Cassie, she says. Steward Cassie from Midway Rock.

Quick, heavy footsteps come to the door. Cassie? It’s the middle of the night. What’re you doin here after curfew?

Open the door, she says. Hurry. Please.

There’s a fumbled rush as he lifts the bar, then a tall, husky lad fills the doorway. He lights the night with a rush lantern. There’s a firestick unner his arm. Long life to the Pathfinder, he says. What’s the matter? What’s happened?

Cassie holds out the baby.

He stiffens. What’s that? he says.

It’s yer daughter, Noble. She raises her voice. Rae, I’ve got yer baby here.

There’s a sharp cry, a rush of feet, then Rae’s there. Her arms reach desperate fer the child. Noble blocks the doorway with his body so’s she cain’t git past. She pummels his
back with a snarl of rage. How did you—? You stole her? he says.

Saved her, says Cassie. They left her in a ditch fer the night beasts to take.

Give her to me! Rae scrambles like a beast herself as she tries to shove past Noble. But he ain’t movin an he’s much bigger’n she is.

You shouldn’t of took her, he says to Cassie. She must be a good fer nuthin or they wouldn’t do that. The Pathfinder knows best.

There ain’t a thing wrong with this baby, says Cassie. Nuthin that good care an love from her parents cain’t make right. Look! She’s perfect. She came early is all. Cassie pulls away the sheema, shows Noble her limbs, but he don’t look. Not even a glance. The baby starts to cry, woke by the fuss. Cassie covers her up agin, soothes her.

We don’t want no trouble, says Noble. We ain’t havin no baby here. Our only family is the Earth, you know that. If they find out, it don’t bear thinkin what they might do to us.

He tries to shut the door, but with a No! Rae shoves herself between him an it.

They won’t find out, says Cassie. I’m gonna help you. We’re all gonna help you. We’re gonna help each other. Everythin’s changin, Noble. We ain’t livin unner the boot no more. We
can heal the earth, work the land, raise our children, an not at the point of a gun.

That kinda talk’ll git you slaved or worse. Take her away now, I mean it, he says. Rae, hush, please! Cain’t you see I’m tryin to do what’s right here?

Rae’s pushin him, pullin him. Let! Her! In! she says. Three words, each one jaggedly fierce.

I got a elder with me right here, says Cassie. She knows all about babies. She’ll teach you how to care fer her, what she needs. Most of all, she needs you. Her father an mother.

Ohmigawd, what’re you doin? says Noble. What’s happenin here? You can tell he’s startin to waver. Fer the first time, he looks at the baby. Well how about that, he says. She’s got a nose jest like my ma. In his voice there’s both wonder an defeat.

She’s made from yer own flesh an blood, Noble. She’s yer child, says Cassie. I got some friends here I want you to meet.

At that, me an Mercy walk outta the dark into the light of the lantern. Noble sees my tattoo right away. Ohmigawd, he says. He tries to raise his firestick, but he’s jugglin that an the lantern an keepin Rae an Cassie at bay an he was already on the verge, so his last defence crumbles.

With a cry of relief, Rae seizes the baby, Cassie slips past him an the two of ’em disappear into the cabin. I raise my hands an me an Mercy keep on comin.

We ain’t got no weapons, Noble, I says. We ain’t armed. We’re here to help.

He flattens hisself to one side to let us pass. His face tangles in complete confusion. His hair’s askew. I smile, friendly-like. Try to look normal, not ghostly. His gaze twitches to Nero, perched on the tree in his yard. To the starwild sky an the wind pointer as it chitters to an fro. Then he looks back at me, eyes wide.

I hitched a ride on the wind, I says.

I close the door behind me. Close it on two nervous people with a newborn child an Mercy to show ’em the way. I lean aginst the door fer a moment. I let out a long, thankful breath. One baby. One tiny crack. It worked.

Everythin okay? Jack’s low, husky voice rides the dark easily. I go to him. He’s leanin aginst the shed, huddled in his cloak.

I’m okay, I says, but that baby’s got problems. Her name’s Lucky Star. Luck, fer short.

He winces. I know a tavern called the Lucky Star, he says. Scurviest dump in the livelong world.

I invite myself inside his cloak. Fold myself around his
heat, his heartbeat. His arms circle my waist. But he takes his time, I notice.

So, he says. Ruthless killer sees the error of her ways. How does it feel?

Like this, I says. I take his face in my hands an I kiss him. With relief. With hope. With the newness of a day that I ain’t never seen. With somethin my dustborn soul don’t know the name of.

I wanna be with you tonight, I whisper. Jack, I—

He pulls away. His eyes pull the warmth from me as he says, I won’t have too much to lose, d’you hear?

My bones take the stab. Quick an cold. I know what he means right away. He means he will not love me. He will not give all to me. He’s lost all before. What he loved most dearly. His child. His Gracie.

Fer all he’s said to me before, how he feels about me, he’s drawin the line, steppin back from the line. But why why why? What’s brought him to this? Only two nights ago, we lay together. In the bed he’d made of fir boughs. Maybe I didn’t hear him right. Maybe he—

He sets me away from him. Out from his arms. When we was in that white room, he says. With DeMalo’s fake visions. What did you mean when you said, them people in the bunks?

The smell of danger prickles my scalp. I don’t remember sayin that, I says.

Well you did, he says. You said, when them people lay on them bunks fer the very last time, they died with hope that somebody would find the seedstore one day. What people in the bunks? How d’you know people died there?

But why? This is why. Ohmigawd, I let that slip. Does he suspect I was in the vision room before? One wrong word here, this could all break open. Be careful. Be very careful.

I really don’t remember sayin that, I says. But, uh … I dunno, I guess I jest imagined what might of happened. Like you said, it was a lot to take in all at once. The seedstore an the maps an the vision room, the bunks. I s’pose I jest seen it all an made a story that made sense of it to me. Didn’t you? Ain’t that what anybody’d do?

I dunno, you tell me, he says.

An I’m thinkin, that don’t sound like he believes me. Would I believe me if I was him? My mind dashes about, tryin to think what else I might of let slip. It ain’t like him not to say what’s on his mind. Not to chide me direct fer my sins. But then Cassie’s comin outta the cabin an Jack’s sayin, completely normal, like he didn’t jest maybe very possibly stick a knife in me,

So, what next, Saba? More baby stealin?

I … uh … yeah, I says. Mercy’s gonna see these two through the night. You’ll be glad of her skills, so she’ll stay on till you ain’t got need of her no more. You should take every
child they leave out to die. Return ’em to the parents, but only if they can be trusted. If not, you’ll hafta keep the babies safe an well.

Okay, he says. But there won’t be that many exposed. A handful at most. You’ll need a lot more babies than that to make any progress. This’ll take weeks. Months.

No, no, we bin talkin about that jest now, says Cassie. It’s obvious what we do. In fact, Rae was the one said it. We’ll need the help of the midwives to steal the babies to their parents. There ain’t no Tonton in the birthin room, jest the midwife. Mercy says they ain’t innerested in stillborns. They don’t wanna see ’em. The midwife’s in charge of the burial. So she reports a stillbirth an we take the baby. Cassie looks at Jack. Could you git Mercy back into the babyhouse she used to be at? The other midwife there was of the same mind as Mercy. She’s sure that she’ll help.