Radiance (6 page)

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Authors: Shayne McClendon

Tags: #Gay & Lesbian, #Literature & Fiction, #Erotica, #Gay, #Romantic, #Romance, #Contemporary

BOOK: Radiance
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Chapter Six

 

Brie’s Birthday – End October 2014

When Marciella Canfield left
Trois
with Fahad and Nuri Ghonim, Brie smiled at Hudson.  “I like her
very
much.” 

“She’ll benefit from your friendship.”  He kissed the back of her hand.  “I do.” 

“You slay me.” 

He winked.  “How are you?”

She knew what he asked and censored her answer.  “I haven’t seen either of them in two weeks.  Natalia let it slip they were traveling.”  She laughed.  “I’m not privy to schedules.” 

“How are
you
, Gabriella?” 

“Hopeful.”  She tightened her fingers around his.  “He plays the violin, Hudson.” 

Eyes wide, her best friend asked, “Elijah?”  She grinned.  “What an interesting gift for one such as him.”  He stared at her intently.  “You love him?”  Biting her lower lip, she gave a shy nod and he smiled broadly.  “That explains why you’re glowing more than usual.  I try not to pry.” 

“Since
when
?”  She lifted a brow and he chuckled.

Just then, Natalia appeared and she looked…rattled.  “Brie.  It’s getting late.  You should let me take you home.” 

Frowning, she started to reply when movement on the floor above caught her eye. 

Harper escorted a stunningly beautiful woman along the balcony to a corner seating area.  She was barely dressed so her flawless skin was clear to see from thirty feet away. 

When she sat, the dark man joined her and spoke to the server who approached.  Elijah took up a position at one side staring into the distance. 

Though his face was blank, Brie could
see
the tension around him.  She watched him for almost a minute before he gave a slight frown and let his eyes track the room. 

He found her gaze on the floor below.  He unfolded his hands as if to make his way to her side.  She shook her head. 

Turning to Natalia, she murmured, “I really
am
rather tired.” 

Quickly saying goodbye to her friends and deflecting Tawny’s always perceptive questions, she allowed Natalia to push her chair through the club. 

At the entrance, Stav lifted her carefully and deposited her in Hudson’s car.  Her best friends slid in on either side of her. 

Before they could attempt to reassure her, she whispered, “Don’t say anything.  Not tonight.”  She couldn’t meet their gazes and couldn’t control her hurt.  “I’ll
never
fit.  I don’t possess the necessary emotional detachment.” 

They escorted her home and when she was changed into comfortable clothes, she saw them to the door. 

“Thank you for a beautiful birthday.  You make everything amazing.  Go back to the club and make up an excuse that Riya and Tawny will believe.”

“Darling…”

“I can’t discuss it right now.  I love you both so much but I need to be alone.”

“Gabriella.”  She fought and won the battle to meet Hudson’s black eyes.  “I’m taking you to breakfast.” 

“Stop trying to feed me all the time.” 

He hugged her tightly and she looked at Natalia for help.  She didn’t know how long she could keep her composure. 

“Goodnight and happy birthday, darling.  I’ll call you.” 

Wrapping her arm through Hudson’s, Natalia pulled him into the hall and Brie closed the door behind them. 

Only then could she release the tears of hurt, confusion, and frustration she’d kept tightly restrained while in the presence of a man who seemed to be a mind reader in regards to her. 

* * *

Brie should have expected the light knock an hour later but somehow didn’t.  There was no way to hide she’d been crying.

Opening the door to Elijah, she watched his expression change from one of worry to one of pain. 

“I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry, Brie.” 

Tiredly, she shook her head.  “It doesn’t matter.” 

“It matters.” 

“Not enough.  Why are you here?” 

There was a long pause.  “He does what he can to keep you in a box.”  He shook his head.  “I refuse to acknowledge the box.  It makes him angry.”

Brie tried to understand what he meant. 

“He lashes out in a way he knows will hurt you to make me follow the rules.  Let me come in, Brie.” 

Stepping back, she gestured him inside.  When the door clicked shut, Elijah lifted her into his arms and walked to her couch.  Sitting there with her on his lap, he hugged her tightly.  They remained silent for several minutes. 

“You need affection.”  The words confused her and she sat up to stare into his eyes.  “You’re still healing.  This is a difficult time for you and I want you to have peace.”

“What are you suggesting?” 

“Give back as good as you’ve gotten, Brie.  Take the offense rather than defense.” 

She let the statement play through her mind.  “Like a fling?”  He nodded.  “Wouldn’t that…hurt you?” 

His fingers clenched in her hair.  “You worry about
me
when
your
heart suffers.”  He wrapped his arms more snugly around her.  “Brie.” 

“I don’t want you in the crossfire, Elijah.  You’ve done nothing wrong and it isn’t right.”  The thought of hurting him made her physically ache.

“Seek the comfort you need while you fight through your rehabilitation.”  He smoothed his hand over her skull to cup her neck.  “You won’t hurt me by taking what you need.” 

“I’m jumbled.” 

He took several deep breaths.  “I’m caught between my history and what could be my future.  It’s a position that causes conflict on many fronts.” 

“I make it worse.”  She watched him consider his answer. 

“I’d rather be the person who comforts you, Brie.  I can’t be that person right now.  Despite my own situation, I sense what you need and there’s no shame in it.  Affection and touch will help you heal faster and protect your gentle emotions.” 

“I didn’t expect you to suggest something like this.” 

He stroked a strong hand down her back.  “I know Harper well.  Seeing you change direction will shake his foundation.” 

“I don’t like to play games, Elijah.” 

“It isn’t a game.  If you become involved and commit your heart, it’s
our
loss, Brie.  I
want
you for myself.  I can’t
take
you for myself.  My hands are tied in ways I can’t explain.” 

Swallowing hard, she knew she had to let go of the possibilities with Elijah until she was physically stronger.  Handling Harper at her best would present enough of a challenge.  There was
no way
to win in her current condition.

“The thing is…it’s not likely to happen anyway.” 

“Why do you think that?” 

Lifting one shoulder, she whispered, “Even if I
wanted
to find something like that, I’m no use to anyone.  I…”  She dissolved into tears and covered her face. 

“Brie. 
No, Brie
.” 

For several minutes, she sobbed brokenly in the arms of a man who bore it differently than any other person in her life.  He held her hard and let her cry until she was raw. 

She was ashamed that she’d hoped to have
him
as her primary companion while she healed.  Even though he had better things to do than babysit a woman in rehab, Elijah was wonderful company and she already loved him. 

His relationship with Harper forbid her to ask or expect it of him.  She wouldn’t put him in such an awkward position but…

Letting him go
hurt
.

Chapter Seven

 

Harper stood in his kitchen wearing the sleep pants he’d pulled on after his shower. 

He was pouring a glass of wine for his
date
when Elijah entered and slammed the front door hard enough to elicit a scream from the woman wearing nothing but her panties.

His bodyguard looked at her and said through gritted teeth, “Get dressed and get out.” 

Shocked, Harper shouted, “Elijah!” 

The look his friend turned on him caused a shiver of fear to skate up his spine.  Only an
idiot
wouldn’t fear the man when he was in a rage. 

Harper was well aware that he was armed at four locations on his body.  None of the weapons were as deadly as his hands.

To the female whose name had slipped his mind, he said, “There’s a threat.  Dress and my driver will take you home.” 

“A threat?” She put her shoulders back to exhibit her fake tits and widened her eyes like a baby deer.  “Oh,
no
.  I want to stay with you.  I don’t know
what
I’d do if anything happened to
you
, Harper.” 

Her words were said breathlessly, at an unnecessary pitch, and it was so fucking familiar that he hated himself for a moment. 

“Dress and my driver will take you home.”  She started to speak again and he couldn’t bear it.  “
Now
.” 

While she scurried into his bedroom to find her clothes, Harper stayed where he was and maintained eye contact with his best friend. 

Elijah opened the door when she reappeared and the instant she cleared it, he slammed it behind her. 

“What the fuck is
wrong
with you?” 

Crossing the room, the bodyguard stopped a foot from him.  He wore the same clothes he’d been wearing when he escorted him and the woman to the door of the apartment and walked away without a word two hours before.  Already an inch taller, being barefoot in front of him made Harper feel vulnerable. 

He didn’t appreciate it one fucking bit.

“Give me a few minutes and we can talk about your tantrum.”  Keeping his tone flip, he said the sentence he should have held back.  “This one had a lot of energy and you missed out by spending time with your pet
rabbit
.” 

Faster than the eye could track, Elijah wrapped his large hand around Harper’s throat.  “Ever refer to Brie with such blatant disrespect again and I
will
hurt you.” 


Jesus…
”  In forty years, Elijah had never threatened to hurt him.  It was Gabriella’s influence. 

“Not even
he
would save you, Harper.”  He tightened his fingers slightly and released him.  “I gave her up to protect her so
fuck you
and your energetic whore.  Send her a bigger bracelet in compensation.” 

“She’s just a
woman
.” 

“You have no clue how wrong you are and on the day you learn, I hope the emotional pain is
immense
.  Perhaps then you’ll learn some fucking humanity.  I’m unsure when you lost it.” 

“Elijah…” 

“Your capacity for cruelty toward a gentle human being sickens me, Harper.  Did you purposely
slice at her
on her birthday, in front of all her
friends
, or was that a fucking
bonus
?” 

It wasn’t cruel to establish boundaries.

“Elijah…” 

“Don’t try to fucking
speak
to me when I have the salt from Brie’s tears on my goddamn
shirt
.”  He backed from the kitchen, his body vibrating with fury. 

Then he turned and walked to his own room, slamming a door for the third time in less than five minutes.

Harper had
never
heard him slam a door in his life.  He lifted a shaking hand and raked it through his hair. 

She had a far stronger hold on Elijah than he’d realized. 

* * *

When Brie opened her eyes, again placed carefully in her bed by Elijah, she reflected on the fact that she’d grown weak. 

Physically incapacitated for the first time in her life, she’d allowed her injuries and recovery to sap her confidence, her hope, and her positive nature. 

To her reflection, she said firmly, “Snap out of it.  Today.” 

Using a cream to bring down the swelling around her eyes, she dressed carefully.  She needed all the armor she could muster when Hudson arrived.  The man saw everything.

Considering she hadn’t been much of a crier before the day she landed in New York, she cried far too frequently these days. 

The trait disgusted her. 

After she dressed, she picked up the cane and did a few test laps in her bedroom.  Slow but doable. 

Making her way to the kitchen, she started the coffee pot and stared at nothing. 

Harper had deliberately shown up at
Trois
with a spectacular woman on his arm to hurt her for spending time with Elijah. 

The question was…
why

To do such a thing meant he
knew
it would affect her.  He was aware she was unguarded where he and Elijah were concerned. 

Frowning, she said aloud, “What a douche move.” 

The man wanted her but only on his terms.  Sex
only
…none of that messy
emotion
she was known to have. 

His display the night before was the equivalent of a sharp slap to show her who was in control.  A hateful reminder that while Elijah might have told her he’d wait, Harper had no intention of putting his life on hold for someone like her.

The more she thought about it, the angrier she got.  When Hudson tapped on her door, she made her way to it, and threw it wide. 

His eyes widened.  “Are you alright?” 

“I’m fucking
angry
.”

“You’re using a cane.” 

“I’m done looking like an old woman.  It takes a little more time but the up side is I can use it as a weapon to beat the fuck out of emotionally stunted people.”  She returned to the kitchen. 

He closed her door and followed.  “Gabriella…” 

“No.  I’m sick of being
sweet little Brie
.  Sick of it.  I’m going to do something crazy and not feel the least bit bad about it.” 

“Does this involve eggs or spray paint?” 

Turning to him, she lifted a brow.  “Would you talk me out of it if it did?” 

“No.  However, I’d enlist Tawny’s assistance to keep you from getting caught.  She loves mayhem.” 

The
fury
evaporated her but her desire to fight didn’t and she laughed.  “I don’t know how she stays out of jail.” 

His expression was gentle.  “What can I do?” 

“Hudson...I want to be like you.” 

“In what way?” 

“Less…
me
.  More you.” 

“Gabriella, you’re perfect.” 

“I’m too soft.  Things make me cry when they should make me flip people off.”  She growled.  “I
hate
crying.” 

“You’ve had reason to cry.” 

“I’m
weak
, Hudson.” 

“You’re
gentle
, Gabriella.  There’s a difference.” 

Lifting her eyes, she told him, “Elijah came here after you and Natalia left last night.” 

She watched him carefully control his expression.  Then she explained their conversation and he was unable to hide his shock. 

“Elijah told you to seek comfort elsewhere?” 

Nodding, she whispered, “What do you think?” 

“One, you’re standing perfectly upright with that cane and seem steady on your feet.  You’ll be back on your own steam in no time.”  The observation made her grin.  “Two, I agree.” 

“You think…an affair is a wise choice?” 

“You must consider it.  You cry because your heart hurts and you’re lonely.  I don’t want you to be lonely.  I hate it.” 

“I-I wouldn’t know where to look for…casual.”  She shrugged.  “It’s never been my thing and I’m limited.  You know?” 

“Avoid anyone involved in the lifestyle until you heal.  Someone new may neglect to consider your injuries.”  He mused, “I know attractive young men who are biddable.  They work for me.” 

The suggestion made her laugh.  “No matter how much I love you, gonna have to reject your offer to pimp out some nerdy hotties at your company.” 

He snickered and it made her feel a lot better.  “Guard your heart a bit longer, Gabriella.” 

“Agreed.  The fucking thing
clearly
has performance issues.”  Exhaling roughly, she added, “Losing Elijah is painful, Hudson.  I love him.  I don’t want him to suffer.” 

Warm hands cupped her shoulders.  “Trust him.  He wants you and he’ll
find
a way to have what he wants.  It’s the way of such men.  For now, focus on you and let Delkin twist.” 

Smiling slowly, she nodded.  “For once, I’m starving.” 

“Excellent.  Feeding you and Natalia particularly pleases me.” 

“Lord, why?” 

“As a boy, food was too often a luxury.  Feeding the people I care about always reminds me how far I’ve come.” 

“You’re awesome.  Just fucking awesome.”  He kissed her hair, guided her to the door, and they descended to the lobby. 

Carlo came out from behind the desk.  “Brie!  Look at you!”  He hugged her tight.  “Henry!” 

The doorman peeked through the glass and his smile covered his whole face.  He rushed in and took her shoulders.  “There’s the bright and happy girl I remember.”  He bent to kiss her cheek.  “I can’t wait to tell the others.” 

“My stomach is going to eat my face.  I’ll chat when I get back.” 

“Of course.  Enjoy, Brie.  This is going to be a
good
day.”  Carlo hugged her again and returned behind the desk. 

Henry held the door with a huge grin.  “Mr. Winters.  Miss Hernandez.” 

“Thank you, Henry.”  The words from Hudson filled Brie with pleasure and when they were on the sidewalk, he glanced down and winked. 

Leonard waited at the curb and said, “Lola is going to lose her shit, you know.  Kickass results, Brie.” 

Behind them, Harper’s car pulled to a stop.  Elijah stepped out and stood stiffly to the side as his charge exited the vehicle. 

Brie called out, “Good morning, Elijah.  Kiss my ass,
Delkin
.” 

Then she got in the back of Hudson’s car and didn’t look back.

When they were a block away, Hudson started laughing and it was highly contagious. 

* * *

Harper feared he’d irreparably damaged his relationship with Elijah by his actions. 

They unexpectedly returned to the building so he could use his apartment’s secure system for an emergency call to a small outpost in eastern Africa. 

As he got out, he was shocked to see Gabriella preparing to get into Winters’ car.  She looked incredible. 

Clearly, Elijah overstated her distress. 

In tandem with the thought, she called, “Good morning, Elijah.  Kiss my ass,
Delkin
.”

He blinked at the pissed off side of her he’d been unaware she possessed.  She ducked into the limo and a ripple of awareness shot through him. 

Gabriella didn’t look back.  Winters didn’t acknowledge him. 

Seeing her inner fighter emerge, he recognized that he’d hurt her far more deeply than he intended. 

The woman had been an impulse decision, one meant to show he wasn’t waiting around for Gabriella’s attention. 

How his date for the evening
looked
hadn’t even crossed his mind since she resembled so many others who were similar in nature.  That she was barely dressed was also common. 

In hindsight, he’d ignored Elijah’s comments about Gabriella’s embarrassment about her scars.  He’d forgotten her insistence during their first conversation that she wasn’t Harper’s
type

How the fuck was he supposed to fix the cluster he created?

Elijah’s eyes flicked to his and away.  Sighing, Harper got back to work and knew he’d have to figure it the fuck out if he ever expected his oldest friend to talk to him again.

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