Rachel Golden and the Retriever of Sin (22 page)

But what if they didn’t make it back? Then what? What if El got hold of the Retriever of Sin and used it to carry out whatever plan he had? And what about the rift she had seen? The tear between worlds that was causing her own world to crumble. Ugh. Too much to think about. One problem at a time, Rach, she told herself, hugging her knees in the cold dark of the cell. Think about yourself; think about Kel and the others. Then think about saving the world.

She dozed, for how long she had no idea, but was woken by the rattle of a key in the lock. She sat up, rubbing her eyes, as the heavy oak door swung open letting in dim yellow light from the corridor. El was standing there with the piebald feral unicorn. ‘On your feet,’ he said flatly. She guessed he was still hurting from having his tendon slashed, as he was using the unicorn for support. She caught the eye of the animal, who winked at her as she stood. Well there was something. Was he telling her everything was going to be okay? She didn’t see how it could be. Maybe he just felt bad for not helping in the fight. She couldn’t blame him though. If she was food for the Dark Ones, she wouldn’t be in a hurry to make trouble either.

Back in the banquet hall the two Overlords were standing with the Dark Ones. The Overlord she’d knocked out was wearing a ridiculously large bandage on its head, like a turban. The Dark One she’d slashed hadn’t bothered to do anything about the wound on its shoulder; there was just a shiny patch of black hair where the blood had dried.

Kel was sitting cross-legged on the floor, looking unhurt. Thank god. Ros and AC were with him and Rachel was ordered to sit with them. El sat down on one of the barrels between the Overlords. He winced with the pain of movement. He pulled Rachel’s Magnum from his robes and placed it on the table in front of him.

‘Well now,’ he said, looking at each of the captives in turn. ‘Isn’t this nice?’

‘Quiet, human,’ the Overlord without a turban barked. ‘We’re not here for you to show off. You’re incredibly lucky we haven’t eaten you already. You. Girl. Where is the Retriever of Sin? This man,’ he looked at El, ‘told us you have it in your possession. Give it to us. We have a deal with him. When you were presented to him, he would open a portal to your world. Your world is full of humans. And we
like
humans.’ Saliva was dripping from its jaws again and Rachel shivered.

‘Well, you’re out of luck, pony-boy,’ she said. ‘We don’t have the Retriever of Sin. His minions took it from us.’ She jerked a thumb at El.

‘Is this true?’ the Overlord asked.

El swallowed. ‘Uh, well…’ he said, eyes flickering nervously. Luckily for him he didn’t need to finish the sentence. At that moment the door to the banquet hall opened and Toby, Ratboy and Pig-face walked in.

‘Yes. It’s true,’ Toby said. He was swinging the pocket watch on its chain, grinning like a smug little prick. He swaggered up to El and handed it to him. Rachel groaned inwardly. Then something the Overlord said registered in her brain.

‘Wait a minute,’ she said, ‘you had a deal with El that if you got us here he would open a portal to our world? Why?’

‘Enough!’ The Overlord stamped a hoof. ‘Do you know how long it’s been since we’ve tasted human flesh? Do you know how hard it’s been not to eat these ones?’ He gestured to El and the bullies. He was almost foaming at the mouth now and El recoiled from his outburst.

‘No, I meant what does Lemming want with
us
?’ she asked.

‘Not “us”,’ the fat man said quietly, staring at the watch in his hand. He looked up at Rachel. ‘
You
.’ Rachel felt herself shiver again. There was something horrible and hungry in the man’s eyes.

‘What do you want with
me
, then? How do you even know who I am? I’m just a failed trainee Hero.’

‘How do I know who you are?’ El asked, chuckling softly. He pulled the gun a little closer to him. ‘How did I know you were coming to this world? How did I know where and when you’d arrive? How did I know you were coming through the mine tunnel? Didn’t you ever suspect that there was a spy on the Council?’

‘Crabs!’ Kel said. ‘I
knew
it! That fishy old bastard.’ Kel got to his feet and El picked up the revolver.

‘Want to risk it, boy?’ he asked. ‘It didn’t work the last time your girlfriend pulled the trigger, but do you really want to gamble that that will happen twice in a row?’ He cocked the hammer of the gun and Kel froze, eyes fearful. He cheeks flushed red.

‘She’s my Hero,’ he said quietly, ‘not my girlfriend.’ Despite the danger they were in Rachel felt her heart contract at his words. Not his girlfriend… That hurt. She looked away and blinked back tears. Kel sat down again, not taking his eyes off the gun.

‘Crabs?’ El said, laughing again. He shook his head slowly. ‘That old fool? The Council doesn’t trust him anymore. Not for thirteen years. Not since that day on the cliff.’ He looked at Rachel and his watery blue eyes bored into hers.

She felt her heart jump again. Of course! That picture of her dad in Crabs’ shack. He
had
been her dad’s guide. And El
did
have something to do with what happened. She looked at the gun in El’s hand, and he saw her looking. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘I haven’t seen this in years. Kind of fitting that you would find it, eh Rachel?’ He ran his thumb across the initials R.G. carved into the grip.

‘Wait a second,’ Kel said. ‘If Crabs wasn’t the spy, who was?’

El continued staring at Rachel for a couple of beats, with a look of… something in his eyes. Sadness? He turned to the Safeguarder. ‘Idiot boy [here he really
did
sound like Lemming]. Your spy is right there.’ He pointed at Ros.

‘
What
??’ Kel said, and his mouth fell open. Everyone in the room turned to look at the dog, who was physically shaking.

‘Y-you don’t understand!’ Ros wailed, tears running down his black furry cheeks. ‘I was trying to
help
us.’

Rachel couldn’t believe what she was hearing. ‘Oh Ros,’ she breathed, feeling so deeply betrayed. ‘I thought you were our friend. Our
Guide
. How could you?’ Even AC, who normally wouldn’t be paying attention, looked disgusted. He stepped away from the dog with a mixture of hatred and betrayal and hurt on his face.

‘Please,’ the dog begged, ‘you don’t understand.’ He pointed at El with a shaking paw. ‘He said he could help me. Help
us
. You know I’ve never been into the Altworld before.’ He was looking imploringly from Kel to Rachel. ‘He said that no one would get hurt. He just wanted the Retriever of Sin. He said if I brought it to him then he would let us all go. You
have
to believe me!’

None of the rest of the party could look Ros in the eye.

‘This is all
fascinating
,’ the Overlord snapped, ‘but oh yeah. I don’t care. El, you have the girl, you have the Retriever of Sin, now OPEN OUR PORTAL! Before I rip your throat out.’

El was staring at the gun in his hand, and a smile started to spread across his face. He looked up at the Overlord, the Overlord that had been threatening and abusing him for weeks now. Yes. He did indeed have everything he needed, right in front of him. ‘Oh this?’ he said, holding up the gold pocket watch. It ding-ed, and Rachel realized how much she’d missed the sound. ‘This isn’t the Retriever of Sin.’

Everyone stared at him. Even the feral unicorns seemed to be interested. ‘I don’t understand,’ the Overlord said. ‘You said that—’

‘Shut up!’ El shouted. He pulled back the hammer of the gun. It was pointing at the Overlord, who took a step back, eyes wide. ‘I never said this was the Retriever of Sin,’ he said, shaking the watch on its chain. ‘
There
is the Retriever of Sin!’ Again he pointed at Ros, who was still sniveling. For the second time, all eyes in the room turned to the dog. Ros blinked.

‘Ros. Get it? R.O.S: Retriever of Sin.’

Rachel and Kel looked from El to Ros and back again, mouths hanging open in disbelief. Even Ros looked like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

‘I’m sure he’s told you that his nose can smell between dimensions?’ El was ranting now, and paced the room maniacally. Flecks of spit were forming at the corners of his mouth. ‘Well that’s not the only thing that’s inter-dimensional about this beautiful little dog.’ Ros backed up, looking more scared than ever. Rachel
did
remember Ros bragging about that.

‘Oh yeah,’ El went on, grinning like a madman, ‘and that story about retrieving sin? That’s bullshit. He’s a Labrador retriever. He belongs to a guy called Sinbad. Or Sin for short. He is literally the
Retriever of Sin
. Take a bow, Ros!’ The pocket watch ding-ed again, and El cackled. ‘The watch is right, folks! We really must be going.’ He clicked it open and twisted several of the dials on the face. ‘Let me just set the co-ordinates, and we’ll be out of your hair.’

He looked up at the Overlords. ‘Yeah, sorry about backing out on our deal, but you can have these.’ He gestured to Toby and the bullies. ‘I have no use for them anymore.’

A look of panic flashed into Toby’s eyes and he started backing away. ‘Now hold on a minute,’ he said, pleading, ‘none of this is my fault! It was Ratboy! He’s the one who screwed up. It’s all his fault.’ He pointed a shaking finger at his ‘friend’. ‘Eat him!’

Ratboy was staring at the floor, toying with something in his pocket. If anyone was looking closely enough they would see that he too was shaking. But it was with anger. ‘My name,’ he said quietly, through gritted teeth, ‘isn’t Ratboy.’ He pulled a six inch dagger from his pocket and plunged it into Toby’s back. The head bully froze, blinking in shock, before falling to his knees. Ratboy pulled the knife out of Toby’s back and hot red blood squirted two feet out from the puncture.

Several people in the room gasped, but the Overlords seemed to be taking it the hardest. Thick saliva started dripping from their fangs as the scent of fresh human blood hit their nostrils. They took shaking steps toward the fallen bully, eyes fixed on the growing pool of crimson blood.

Despite her fear and the increasing madness of the situation, Rachel couldn’t help but be impressed with Ratboy (or whatever his real name was. Damn. Don’t ever call him ‘Ratboy’ again…). And the irony that he had literally stabbed Toby in the back wasn’t lost on her either.

‘Enough!’ one of the Overlords shouted. ‘Dark One!’ he pointed to one of the massive black beasts. ‘Seize him.’ The animal snorted a jet of flame from its nostrils and took a step toward El. The man actually giggled. Rachel had the feeling that El’s mind was coming apart at the seams. He pocketed the gold watch, pointed the gun at the Dark One’s head, and pulled the trigger. This time there
was
a thunderous explosion. The unicorn’s huge head exploded, spraying everyone in the room with blood and brain and bone. An ear, miraculously intact, landed with a wet slap in the middle of the banquet table. Half a second later it was pierced by the tip of an onyx horn, which vibrated, sticking upright in the wood. There wasn’t even a gasp. Everyone was stunned.

El giggled again. ‘.44 Magnum,’ he said to the room. ‘That’s why your dad brought it, Rachel. To deal with these… things.’ He waved the gun at the fallen headless unicorn. Rachel thought she was going to throw up. ‘Golden!’ he shouted, to get her attention. Rachel’s head snapped up. ‘Get the dog and come here. Do anything stupid and your boyfriend gets the next shot.’

In a daze Rachel walked over to Ros and picked him up. The dog was shaking in her arms. El was trying to keep everyone in the room covered with the gun. ‘He’s not my boyfriend,’ Rachel said quietly with tears in her eyes as she looked at Kel. ‘He’s my Safeguarder.’ Kel opened his mouth but no words came out.

El had the gun in one hand and the pocket watch in the other. ‘Now, Golden girl,’ he said, ‘I need you to be touching me and the dog when I click this button.’ His thumb was on the winder at the top of the pocket watch. ‘Ordinarily I would be travelling alone, but since you’re tagging along I need you to take hold of my arm. If you let go, I shoot the Safeguarder, boyfriend or not. Got it?’

Rachel nodded numbly. As El began to count backward from three the floor of the castle started to shake. She stumbled sideways, letting go of El’s arm. Everyone tried to steady themselves as the shaking grew more violent. ‘What is this?’ El shouted, trying to aim the gun at one of the Overlords. ‘What are you doing?’

‘I don’t know!’ the Overlords screamed. The unicorns were all having trouble trying to stay on their feet. A loud rumbling accompanied the shaking, and dust and pieces of broken stone began to fall from the ceiling.

Rachel had been knocked to the ground by the shaking, and was genuinely afraid the castle would fall down. Did this Altworld get earthquakes? If it did, the timing was impeccable. Then, as suddenly as it had started, the shaking stopped. Silence fell on the room and the dust began to settle. Everyone looked at each other cautiously, wondering whether it was safe to move.

Just when they thought it was over, one of the huge flagstones of the floor exploded upward. Everyone covered their heads from a rain of rubble. When they dared to open their eyes a rabbit the size of an SUV was standing in the middle of the hall. He was wearing a crown.

AFTERWARD, EVERYONE THERE HAD SLIGHTLY DIFFERING ACCOUNTS of what happened next. So many things happened at once that nobody saw everything. People
thought
they saw things that they didn’t. And some things happened that no one saw. But it was safe to say that all hell broke loose. Most of it, anyway. Here are some of the things that definitely happened:

When the rabbit Crown had burst out of the ground, he looked around and saw Rachel. Later she found out that the rabbits and moles had gone looking for her when the butterfire larvae returned home to the warren. They knew that the vial had been broken, and fearing for the Hero’s safety, they followed the caterpillars’ pheromone trail. They had been en route to the dungeon when they heard the gunshot.

They broke up through the floor, and seeing the carnage, the rabbit Crown gave a signal and a dozen rabbits and another dozen moles had burst out of the ground in the banquet hall. The rabbits, with their exceptionally powerful back legs, and the moles with their claws that could mince granite, should have had no problem facing down a Dark One and two Overlords.