Purity (28 page)

See.

“I don’t know how!”

Draw the power from the circle. Use everything you have. Give up a part of yourself.

“I’m not sure I can—”

Sacrifice.

The cup flew from the board and slammed into the bookcase. I leaned away from the board. It was over. The presence was gone, and I was exhausted from keeping that channel open.

“That was…” Joey shook his head. “Maybe I don’t need to know every detail of Perdy’s life.”

“What did it mean?” Nathan asked me. “Can you do it?”

“I can try,” I said. “It’s better than nothing. If there are enough of us, maybe anything is possible.”

“So you still need me to gather everyone in Perdy’s house?” Joey asked, his paling features the only outward sign of his distress.

“Yeah, definitely. We can do this. I just need to prepare.”

“Fine. I’ll go try to sort that out,” Joey said, looking relieved at the thought of leaving. “And, Amelia? Do your best, okay? Whatever that means.”

He left, and I sat there staring at the board.

“Who were you communicating with?” Nathan asked.

I shrugged. “Not sure. I’m guessing somebody from Mémère’s bloodline.”

“Were they even being truthful? I mean, can we trust some random spirit?”

“It could have been someone trying to screw with us, but it didn’t feel like that. The presence felt familiar. Comfortable. I think we can trust this one. I need to figure out exactly what it is I have to do. I need a little more time, but maybe some of the material Joey brought us can help.”

Nathan and I joined the others, ready to tell them what I believed I could do with a little help, but we were interrupted when Stephen got a phone call from the local gardaí.

After he hung up, Stephen said, “The police didn’t give a crap when I reported her missing, but now, after that witness called them, they’ve decided to arrange a search party because they’ve apparently gotten a lot of volunteers needing something to do. What if they end up getting in the way?”

“She’s not anywhere near where they’ll be searching,” I said. “If she were, we would have found her already. Maybe it’ll be a good thing if it keeps people busy for a while.”

“They’re going to think it’s strange if none of us go along,” he said.

Nathan shrugged. “Chance we have to take. You can go if you want.”

“Not a chance,” he scoffed. “I may not be any help against were… whatevers, but I’m going.”

“It might be better if you stay back, though,” Nathan said. “Maybe keep the jeep running in case we have to run. She’ll need to get away. No matter what else happens, Perdita and Ryan’s girls all need a way to get away safely from whatever we have to do out there.”

He nodded. “Fine. As long as I’m there, I don’t care what I have to do to help.”

“Well, before that, you can help me,” I said, my cheeks warming with embarrassment. “I need as many eyes on this stuff as possible, just in case I’m missing something. I’m not completely sure how to go about this, but I feel like that’s what that old woman was trying to tell me.”

“Who the hell was she anyway?” Nathan asked.

“An Irish gypsy, I think. Not quite the same as our ancestors, but there have to be similarities. That’s if she was real.”

“Do you have any idea where to start?” Stephen asked, seeming to take what I said in his stride.

I shrugged, trying to think. “I know that I need something. A link.”

“Something belonging to Perdita?” Nathan offered. “We found her bracelet if that’s any help.”

“It is, but I kind of need vibes. I know it sounds weird, but when we used the spirit board, I was able to channel energy from you and Joey to open up a line safely. I think the same thing would work with scrying, but I’ll need as many people who love Perdita as possible to help me find her. The more we have, the better the connection to her should be, and the more accurate the scrying will turn out.” I swallowed hard. “I hope.”

“I could call her grandmother,” Stephen said doubtfully.

“Joey already agreed to handle her,” I said.

Stephen frowned. “I’ll try
Erin
. But no matter who comes to help, they’ll want to know more.”

“Maybe they’ll believe that this is just something we do when there’s a problem. The way people say they’ll give their prayers for something. If they know you and Joey are involved, then maybe they’ll want to feel as though they helped in some vague, out-in-the-universe sort of way.”

“Good will, karma, luck before the search,” Stephen muttered. “Got it. Are we doing this here?”

I shook my head. “Your house would make more sense. I’ll try to find everything I need, and we’ll follow you over when you and Joey have everyone gathered there.”

He nodded grimly. “I’ll get on that.” He hesitated. “Thank you. Both of you. For helping her and for being there for her when I wasn’t.”

“I care about her,” Nathan said earnestly. “I know you aren’t going to approve of us, and I get that I might have to wait around for her, but I do care about her. That doesn’t change. She can always count on me.”

“Good. I’ll head on. Let me know if there’s news.”

He left, and Nathan and I read up on scrying to make sure we had everything we needed.

“Okay, so I might not know what I’m doing,” I said as we gathered things in my room. “But I can make my own way. There’s something inside me, under the surface. Becoming who I was meant to be is going to help it release.”

“Are you sure?”

“No.” I hesitated. “What else can we do apart from trust our instincts? Ryan’s trying to contact all of his sources, Opa’s brooding, Jeremy’s ready to kill someone, and Byron looks as though we’re all about to die. We have to do something before the deadline runs out.”

“All right. Let’s go talk to Byron.”

Nathan led the way, but Byron wasn’t alone, so I had to tell everyone where we were going. My announcement was met mostly with disbelief.

“Let them go,” Byron said. “It’s better than being around the arguments.”

We left them discussing the merits of indulging in my
interests
. Nathan and I took Cú and headed to Perdita’s house, where everyone was already waiting: Erin, Perdita’s grandmother, even Tammie. They were all willing to help, despite the strange request. Erin and Joey helped us clear the living room so we would have enough space.

“This is kind of weird,” Tammie said, peeling away her nail polish.

“Do you care about Perdita?” I asked.

“Of course I do.”

“Then shut up and join in with everyone else. I need your energy.”

Tammie stared at me. “I always knew you were creepy.”

“That’s enough,” Joey said. “We’re all here for Perdita. If it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. At least we tried.”

“We should be out there looking for her,” Tammie insisted.

“We’ve tried that,” Nathan said. “Trust me. We know she’s not there. They’re not going to stick around in the one spot.”

“Fine,” she said. “But let’s hurry. My mam agreed to drive around with me and look for her.”

Erin and Stephen stood close together, but they didn’t speak, and she didn’t question what we were doing.

I laid the map on the coffee table. “I have a couple of them. We’ll try a larger one, and then if it works, we’ll use the detailed maps to get a more accurate location.” I hoped, but my nerves churned in my gut.

I lit purple candles with trembling fingers, resting the candles on the edges of the map. I held up a crystal attached to a silver chain. “I found this in Mémère’s things. Her family did this kind of thing all the time. I thought… I thought it would be appropriate.”

I went into the kitchen and found the sharpest knife there, closing my eyes before I sliced my hand open.

“What the hell are you doing?” Nathan demanded, following the scent of blood.

I dabbed the end of the crystal in my blood. “I’m not sure, but she said the power was my blood. Can’t hurt to try. It’s kind of a sacrifice. In fact, letting all of these people see this side of me is a massive sacrifice. It’s got to work.”

“Be careful,” he urged, and I followed him back to the others, who all looked a little nervous.

“What do you want us to do?” Nathan asked, speaking calmly even though his heart thudded so loud, I could hear it plainly.

“Hold hands, pretty much. In a circle. Two people’s hands on each of my shoulders, so we’re all connected. Think of Perdita. Think of her happy and well, but picture her face. Close your eyes and try to see her. Let go of the embarrassment and fear and
see
her.”

They all gathered around me as I held the chain in my hand. I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. Two hands on my shoulders, Nathan and Joey, and the circle was complete. We were ready, but I shook inside in the hope it would work and the fear that it wouldn’t.

I chanted under my breath, reciting something I had written based on incantations I had found online and in books. It was less of a spell and more an invocation of power, calling power to me in the hope I could use it. I wasn’t confident, but a shudder ran through me, and I realised vibrations from everyone else were rushing through my own body. That was real. So far so good.

With Perdita’s bracelet around my wrist, I swung the chain gently, still muttering. Ripples of life and love ran under my skin, foreign sensations from other people, and my strength grew, swallowing up the energy until the power swelled.

“Where is Perdita?” I whispered, confident that it was enough, that I could do this. Although the candles flickered, nothing appeared to happen, and my arm began to shake. “Damn it,” I hissed, throwing down the chain. “Where
is
she?”

A gust of wind blew upward from our feet, and the crystal shifted abruptly on the map, dragging the chain along with it. Tammie screamed, and everyone else stepped back abruptly, but I cried out with happiness, keeping my feet rooted to the spot. We were finally getting somewhere.

“Don’t panic!” I shouted, but I had trouble hearing my own voice. The wind kept up, whipping my hair off my face, but the candles remained lit, and I felt fear, real fear, coming from everyone in the group. “Everyone get back together, quickly.”

They all joined their hands again, but it wasn’t until I was linked to everyone through the hands on my shoulders that I felt the power. The real power inside me. Kali’s power. The power of my blood. It rolled and boiled, ready for the taking, ready to be used.

“Wicklow,” I muttered, glancing at where the crystal had come to rest. I slipped the largest map onto the floor, a map of
Leinster
, and arranged the crystal and candles around it.

“Where is she?” My voice was deeper than usual. The words came from deep in my soul, yet outside of me. My veins burned with power, and I swallowed down the triumphant voice that said I could do anything,
anything
, with this kind of juice. If I thought the omega power was addictive, it was nothing compared to this.

But the gypsy guide had warned me about selfishness. I wasn’t going to ruin this for anything. I would learn my lessons this time.

I heard a voice whisper something about my eyes being silver, but I ignored it and focused on finding Perdita. I sensed her out there, felt her bracelet pulse, and I knew we would find her.

The crystal moved.

Wicklow again.

“Hold on,” I shouted. “I need to find a better map. A better…” I brushed through the maps I opened, desperately trying to find one suitable for our purpose. I slammed it onto the table and threw the crystal down as if it burned, forgetting about the candles this time.

“Where is Perdita Rivers?” I demanded, and a chill made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up straight. Wolf was well and truly in the back of her cage, but something else was coming to the surface, some part of me long hidden. I would always be two halves, and I would always fight the temptations that came with my gifted power.

I would give up all of it if I could find Perdita. Every bit. It was the only thing I could think of that might make up for the way I had acted. My eyes felt as though they boiled in their sockets, my heart as though it would burst in my chest.