Authors: Helena Hunting
Violet knocks on the window, looking stoic. Since the car isn’t running, I can’t roll down the window. I have to open the door instead.
“
I’m sorry, Buck.”
I tear my gaze away from the rearview mirror. Sunny isn’t coming back. I know that. “What for?”
“
This whole clusterfuck.” She looks so sad. It’s an echo of what’s going on inside me. “Why don’t you come out so I can take a look at your head?”
It takes a lot of effort to get out of the seat. My face hurts, and I’m dizzy. “I was trying to do a good thing with that fundraiser.”
“
We didn’t know it was going to be like that,” Randy says from behind her.
“
Balls, you mind giving us a few minutes? Maybe you should get your bag together. Clean up all your used condoms and such.” She doesn’t even thrust once.
His head drops, and he rubs the back of his neck. “Sure thing, Vi.” His shoes crunch on the gravel drive as he retreats. The screen door slams shut. A bird twitters somewhere above, and a squirrel makes that weird clicking sound. Fuck the happy sounds of nature.
Vi’s angry. And emotional. She’s on the verge of tears. I’ve witnessed a lot of girl crying lately. I don’t like that I seem to be the cause of it so often. My apology is reflexive. “I’m sorry.”
“
Why? You don’t have anything to be sorry for. Well, maybe you can be sorry for the poison ivy on Sunny’s boobs, but even that wasn’t your fault. It’s not like you forced her to get naked in a forest at hard-on point.”
“
Uh, no. She took her top off all by herself.”
Vi nods and keeps her hand close to my elbow as we walk over to the deck. I don’t know what she thinks she’s going to do if I drop. It’s not like she can catch me. I weigh twice as much as she does.
I sit on the edge of the deck and let her inspect my forehead. “You’re going to need a few stitches, and I think your nose is probably broken.”
“
I figured as much.”
“
I have to take you to the hospital.”
“
I know.” I rest my elbows on my knees and press the heels of my hands against my temples, hoping to alleviate the throb. “This isn’t how I thought today would go.”
“
That makes two of us.”
“
Are you and Waters okay?”
Vi shrugs. “We’ll work it out. Eventually. But Boobgate is in full effect right now. I’m not happy about the way he dealt with this.”
I don’t ask what Boobgate is. I’m pretty sure I know. “The models weren’t topless, even though they looked like they were. We tried to get in and out of there as fast as we could, but it took way long, and now everything’s fucked.”
“
It definitely didn’t look good, that’s for sure.”
“
We would’ve left if we could.”
“
I know that, Buck.” Vi pulls up an image on her phone of what looks like me being kissed by a topless model while another one rubs her boobs on Randy’s arm. “This is what everyone saw today. You left Sunny here with Lily, who’s still on the fence about you, and went to that fundraiser with Balls. Who, incidentally, can’t seem to keep a handle on his dick anywhere he goes.”
“
Sunny warned Lily. I talked to her about it.”
“
You
should’ve warned Lily, and you should’ve told Balls to keep his hands off. Anyway, Balls and Lily are the least of your worries right now. They can sort out their own shit, or not. The fundraiser wasn’t mandatory. You could’ve skipped it. Your girlfriend being covered in poison ivy is a legitimate reason to miss a porno car wash.”
“
It was supposed to be a good thing, and I wanted to talk to the guy who runs it. I didn’t know it was something I should avoid until I got there, and by that time it was too late. Sunny and I even talked about how there’d probably be pictures. I knew she wouldn’t be happy about them, but I didn’t think it’d go like this.”
Violet runs her hand over her face. “I hate the way this went down. Alex better keep Kale away from her. That dick-knob seems like the kind of guy to take advantage of how vulnerable she is right now.”
I lift my head to see if she’s serious. “You don’t think she’ll get back with him, do you?”
“
I don’t know, Buck. I sure hope not. I get that you’re upset about the situation, but everyone was heated, and I’m not sure anyone was making good decisions.” She kicks at the gravel. “Sunny wasn’t wrong about letting people calm down. It would’ve been better if you could have talked to her, but Alex wasn’t going to let that happen, and she knew it. She was trying not to make the problem worse.”
“
Why the fuck does Waters’ opinion matter to her so damn much?” I hate how difficult he’s made things.
“
He’s her brother. He sees you hanging out with these guys who don’t seem to care whose reputation gets dragged through the mud. Then he gets to the cottage and finds her covered in poison ivy while you’re at some fundraiser that looks like a setup for a porno.”
“
He knows how things can be taken out of context.”
“
He sure does. But you saw what I went through when Alex publicly denied being with me on national TV. You even broke his nose over it. Yet you still seem to be okay with Sunny looking like one of your bunnies while you go out and party it up.”
“
But I wasn’t—”
“
I know. You weren’t partying it up, but that’s what it looks like. I believe you because I know you better than that. Alex is going to take some work.”
“
All I want to do is get the fundraiser stuff going. It just backfired on me.”
“
It sure did.” Her phone beeps. She pulls it out. A picture of her and Waters—taken before they even started dating, with her tongue in his mouth—fills the screen. She shoves it back in her pocket.
“
Aren’t you going to check that?”
“
I will in a few minutes. He can wait.”
I’m not sure if me being a priority over Waters is a good thing. “Can I ask you something?”
Vi rests her cheek on her knee. “Sure.”
“
Why’d you get back together with Alex after the relationship denial?”
“
You mean aside from the fact that he has a giant cock and can make me come like a freight train on nitrous?”
“
Don’t be an asshole right now, Vi.”
She sighs. “It’s complicated. I love him even though he hurt me. I wanted to hate him for saying we weren’t together in such a public venue, but I couldn’t. People make bad decisions, especially when they’re under a lot of pressure. Some are worse than others. He knows he fucked up hardcore, and I didn’t sugar-coat how badly. I also don’t pretend to be over it.”
“
You mean still?”
“
I have moments of insecurity. He’s good about it.” She spins her engagement ring around so the diamond is facing her palm. “What I have with Alex, it’s all-consuming when I’m with him, and when I’m not. And it’s rare. It’s not perfect, but we work, and that makes it worth fighting for.”
“
I thought maybe I’d have that with Sunny. I guess not.” I saw how hard it was on Vi when Waters screwed her over. She bawled her eyes out over that asshole for weeks. And then just like that, they were back together. I’m angry at Sunny for not having faith in me, and for letting other people affect her decisions. But I still hope she doesn’t get back with Patchy McBushman Tiny Dick.
“
You had an argument, Miller. That doesn’t mean it’s over.”
“
I’m pretty sure I broke up with her.”
“
It doesn’t have to be the end. I’m mad at Alex right now for being an asshole to you. I won’t be mad at him forever, but I’m going to let it ruminate for a while. It’s why he’s going back to Guelph with Sunny, and I’m here with you.”
“
We fucked up a vacation for you, didn’t we?”
“
Alex fucked it up by overreacting. I swear he could have a second career on the stage if he wanted. We can come back up once we get things sorted out. Sunny was willing to talk. I’m sure she still is. I think what it comes down to is deciding whether she’s worth the effort. Relationships take a lot of energy. I get that you want her to trust you, but you have to give her some time. One conversation about it isn’t a magic recipe for perfection. Loving someone is a lot of work, Buck.”
“
Maybe I’m no good at relationships.” I don’t want to be doomed to a life of bunnies and no substance. They’re not what I want. I want someone consistent. But caring that much about someone gives them a lot of power, and that makes me nervous. Power hurts people. Then I admit the thing that’s been gnawing at me ever since I went to visit Sunny in Guelph and we finally sealed the deal: “I think I might have fallen in love with her.”
“
Then you need to talk to her, Buck.”
“
I need some time to think first.” I wipe away a trail of blood from the bridge of my nose. “I wish there was a drive thru for relationship problem-solving.”
Vi laughs, but it’s humorless. “Don’t we all.” She stands up and wipes the dirt off the back of her shorts. “Come on. Let’s see how Balls is doing. Then we need to get you to the hospital. You probably have a concussion, and I won’t be able to forgive Alex if anything happens to you. Then my whole future’s fucked, and I’ll have the moops for the next year, and I’ll probably start dating Balls because I’ll have to break off the engagement.”
I know she means it as a joke, or that’s how she wants me to take it, but there’s an undercurrent of worry she’s trying to hide.
Her phone buzzes again. It’s the song about peacocks. “I have to get this.”
She wanders out of earshot, but I don’t need to hear the conversation to read her body language. She runs a hand through her hair, stunted by her ponytail. Then she stares up at the sky.
Violet’s jaw is hard; her eyes glitter. I know this face. She’s holding back tears. She lifts her hand as the sun peeks through the clouds and watches the diamond catch the sun, sending prisms of light dancing over her face. Then she spins the diamond to face her palm and closes her fingers around it. She brings her closed fist to her mouth.
Maybe it’s better if I leave things with Sunny alone, even if it hurts more than a puck to the balls after being bitten by a damn spider. I don’t know if I ever want to love someone as much as Vi loves Waters. It seems to cause an awful lot of pain.
***
Apparently Lily wasn’t too happy about the pictures of Randy with the models at the fundraiser. All of his clothes have
ASSHOLE
scrawled across them in various colors of permanent marker. On the front of his boxers is the warning:
SMALL DICK INSIDE
. It’d be funny if it happened to someone else.
Usually he and Lance would laugh off something like this. Not this time. Randy looks legit sick over it, and not in an I-have-a-new-stalker way. It’s in a this-is-fucked-up way instead. He throws the last of his ruined clothes into his bag and zips it up.
“
We should get you to the hospital; that needs stitches.” He points to my forehead.
“
Vi’s gonna take me.”
“
I can follow in the rental.” He picks up a note off the nightstand, flips it open and scans it, then shoves it in his pocket.
Vi appears in the doorway. “That’s okay. It might take a while. You can head back to Toronto if you want and I’ll bring Buck back with me.”
“
Won’t it be outta your way if you have to take me to the airport?” I ask.
“
It’s fine. I don’t mind.”
My head hurts too much to argue, so I let Randy deal with the rental vehicle. I have to wonder if he’s going to make a stop in Guelph. If that’s the case, he should probably stop at a sports store and grab a cup, just in case.
Violet runs back into the cottage once the car is loaded to grab something she forgot. She comes back holding the orange Play-Doh sculpture with the superhero cape. She hugs it, then tucks it safely into the backseat with a sweatshirt wrapped around it.
“
Do you wanna explain that?”
She pats the head. “It’s the Super MC. It’s an homage.”
I shouldn’t ask the next question. I’m almost positive I don’t want the answer. “An homage to what?”
“
The near-fatal strangling of Alex’s MC when I made it into a superhero. It’s a long story. I promise you don’t want to hear it, but someone might tell it at our wedding—if we end up having a wedding. I hope I can convince him to elope.”
I was right. I didn’t need to know any of that.
***
We find our way to a hospital in Bracebridge. It’s small compared to the ones in Chicago, but the people are nice, as is typical in Canada. Someone recognizes my name, and Violet knows all the right things to say, so they see me almost right away. Head injuries always take precedence. I’m concussed, but only mildly. My nose is broken, and the gash on my forehead takes six stitches to close. Up until today, I’d managed to get by without breaking any parts of my face since I got my teeth knocked out in high school. Figures it’d be Waters who changed that.