Prue Phillipson - Hordens of Horden Hall (31 page)

“Oh,” she said to Ursula in the kitchen, “why is he so afraid to let me comfort him?”

“He is a man, my precious, a very private man.”

Mary was cleaning out the bedroom Patrick had slept in, so Bel and Ursula were alone.

“Someone else may need your comfort, my Bel,” Ursula went on. “Mistress Nurse was very distressed when she knew what had happened. Indeed all the village knows. She has not left her cottage since. Perhaps you could go and talk to her.”

Bel sighed. She thought Nurse was tougher than that. Comforting Nurse had never come into her experience, but she threw a shawl round her shoulders and ran to the cottage and knocked at the door.

“Who is it?” came a scared cry.

“Only Bel.”

“What do you want?”

“Just to see if you are well.”

The door was opened a crack. “Who said I wasn’t?

“Oh come, Nan, let me in. I haven’t seen you about. I’ve come to inquire.”

Nurse stood away from the door but went into the dimmest corner and sat down with her back to the one small window. The cottage only had two rooms and Bel was surprised at the untidiness of both, the door to the small bedchamber being open. It was not like Nurse to have so much as a ribbon out of place.

Bel perched herself on the stool by the table, where a bread board and the heel of a loaf lay next to some rolled up grubby stockings. She swivelled round to face Nurse, who kept her eyes averted and her hands clutched tightly in her lap.

“Nan, if you feel frightened here after what happened ...”

“I don’t, I don’t. I’m quite well. You can leave me be, Bella.”

“So come and see Ursula and have some dinner with her, like you used to.”

“No, no, I don’t think so.”

“But you and she are friends, aren’t you?”

“Oh yes. Well, she works hard.” Then Nurse suddenly lifted her head. “I didn’t know she was one of them – a Papist.” She almost spat the word out.

“Oh Nan, what does that matter?” Bel was surprised, then curious. “When did you find out?”

“That day she baked the special bread. I asked her what she was doing, what it was for. She said Father Patrick had come. I’d seen the strange horse in the stable.”

“But he used to come and hide in the priest’s room. You didn’t mind him.”

“Oh, I did, but what could I say? He came for your Mother’s sake. Who was I to question that, but I was mighty glad when he went. The Hall was purged of him.”

Bel was astonished at her vehemence. “So you are not upset at his death?”

Nurse made shooing motions with her hands. “Don’t speak of it, girl. Forget it. It’s over. I don’t think of it. Has he gone? Have they buried him?”

Her confusion, her agitation gave Bel a sudden chilling thought. Father had been asked, “Who knew of the priest’s presence in your house?” Had Nurse spoken of it to someone? To those strangers? On the Sunday she had been tense and nervous.

Bel answered her questions first, “Yes, the authorities buried him in a field outside Newcastle where felons are buried, poor man. No one was concerned to trace his family if he had any and Father has no one to send to make inquiries. So it’s all over, as you say. The villains who did it must live with their consciences as best they can. Like you, they believed they purged the kingdom of a Popish priest.”

Nurse leapt to her feet, her hands over her face. “Why do you say like me?”

Bel stood up too and looked her in the eye. “Nan, did you betray him?”

She screamed and fell back into the chair. “No, no, no. Never. I never knew. They asked me questions. How could I know what they’d do? They kept asking me.”

Bel stared at her, absorbing her words. Oh dear God, she’s done a foolish, wicked thing, not thinking of consequences. Just as I did. This is her black cloud and it will settle about her for the rest of her life.

“Oh, Nan!” She flung herself down at her feet and tried to put her arms round her. “Don’t cry, Nan.” She had never in her life seen Nurse cry. Her solid body was shaking with harsh gasping sobs.

She didn’t clasp Bel in return. She almost seemed to be pushing her away.

“Nan, I’m not angry. Of course you didn’t know. How could you?”

At last Nurse choked out, “You won’t tell? Please don’t tell Sir John.”

“Of course I won’t. It has hit him hard enough already.”

“Or Ursula. You are so close to that woman.”

“No, nor Ursula. It’s finished. They won’t come back.”

Another icy thought struck her. She pulled away and stood up and looked sternly down at the broken woman that had been tough old Nurse, now staring up with terror in her eyes.

“You didn’t tell them about Ursula, that she too is Catholic?”

The fear faded from Nurse’s eyes. She breathed again, deeply.

“Not a word. She was never mentioned. They asked only about a Priest. They had followed him and lost him, but they were told Horden Hall had Catholic sympathies so they came asking. I said, no, no, no. We were all the reformed religion now. But he had visited here in olden days. We didn’t want him, but Sir John was too much of a gentleman to throw out a poor, sick man. I said he was sick.” Nurse was gabbling now. “They said they had orders to know where the priests were, that was all, just to make sure they weren’t making converts, polluting the young. They spoke of God’s truth ... oh, Bella, they were fine preachers.”

Bel leant over her and gave her a kiss. “All right, Nan. It’s over. It really is. You won’t fret any more and you’ll come back to us like you used to?”

She felt the cloud was still hovering, but Nurse gave a curt nod. Bel went to the door and looked back at her. She had picked up the stockings from the table and dropped them in the washing basket. She took the lid off the bread crock and put away the heel of the loaf. She met Bel’s eyes as she opened the door. “Fancy you seeing my place like this.” She grabbed the hearth brush and began to sweep the ash from the rug.

Bel couldn’t help giving her a roguish grin before she ran off. It was a weird reversal of the roles they had always played. Nurse could never dominate her again.

Next day brought rumours of a great Royalist victory at Powick Bridge, where the King’s nephew, Prince Rupert had charged with his cavalry and slain at least a hundred and fifty Parliament men.

A hundred and fifty corpses, Bel thought. We had only one and I never did look to see if his face was cleft in two. She tried to imagine a whole mass of mangled bodies. We are going to have to be hardened to this. Death will become unimportant. But she didn’t say this aloud to her father.

He sat with her in the small dining-room and pecked at his dinner. That the news spoke of a success for the King had not cheered him. “Bella,” he said, “I believe our cousins must come here for your wedding, though God knows we can lay on no festivities. Let us pray the fighting is over by Spring. Clifford has servants and his own carriage and as a man of business he is not a threat to either party.”

Bel gritted her teeth. The wretched topic was back. He looked up and met her eyes. She knew he could see the rebellion in them without a word being said.

“Bella, I can only be at ease when I know you are married to William. You will have a life ahead of you, security, children. No, don’t say anything. This war may drag on and I have no heart for a struggle now. If I mortgage a good part of the estate to Clifford ... he has money and to spare to put into its recovery. If we can bear to go on living here after what has happened and if I survive this winter, we will appoint a day after Easter for the marriage. Please make no difficulties. I am too tired. We will finish our meal in silence.”

Bel complied. He was like a stick so brittle it could snap at any moment, but what will life be like, she wondered, from now on if we are not to speak of this, for I will run away with Ursula rather than be married to William Horden.

CHAPTER 16

April 1643

Nathaniel was in his third year of study at Cambridge. The Cam continued to flow and the students to swim in it or row on it, but the University had not escaped the war. The Colleges had collected their plate together to send to the King. Some had reached him to pay his motley army, some had fallen into Parliament’s hands, and to punish the royalist sentiments at Queen’s an up-and-coming officer, called Oliver Cromwell, had the previous summer brought a troop of soldiers and arrested Dr Edward Martin, the president, and marched him off to prison. These events were very shocking but for those students who had not joined either army, the study of ancient texts and languages continued with quiet absorption.

The war was finely balanced, the battle of Edgehill in the previous October having been indecisive for both parties, and during the winter there was a yearning all over the country for peace.

Ben Hutton, however, believed the King must be comprehensively beaten and he came to say goodbye to Nat before abandoning his studies to enlist with the Trained Bands, “fighting for freedom” as he grandly informed him.

“What sort of freedom is it,” Nat retorted, “for Dr Martin and so many other distinguished men languishing in prison? Did you know that my friend Edward has just learnt that his father, Lord Branford, is in the Tower? His crime is that he refused to support the impeachment of the Bishops. Mr Pym thinks he can purge the Lords and Commons of all who might hinder his plans. Your freedom means all men must think the same, or suffer for it. What is the point of your precious Parliament if no one can speak his mind? How can there be honest, fearless debates?”

“You would rather have one man raise taxes at a whim,” retorted Ben, “give preferment only to his friends, wage war at his say-so and order foreign armies in to massacre his own people. When we are rid of the King we will all be equal and then we can all be free. Even Lord Branford and the Bishops can be freed if they drop their empty titles and become ordinary citizens. Well, Nat, it was amusing knowing you for we never agreed about anything, but I promise to speak up for you on Judgment Day for the crust you shared with me when we were starving.”

Nat laughed and clapped him on the back. Ben was to go with a group of recruits to London first where he would join the Trained Band operating in his part of the City. Nat told him he had seen his father outside his tailor’s shop on the day the King tried to arrest the five members of Parliament. “I don’t think the King was wise that day,” Nat admitted, “but I do believe God set him in his office and we should help, not hinder him in being a better king.”

“Go back to Aquinas and Augustine then and see if that helps.” And Ben rattled down the College stair chuckling.

Edward came in, his young face solemn. “Good, he’s gone. I can’t abide him, but he has the courage to go and fight for what he believes in. I would follow my brother and answer the King’s muster, but Mother goes frantic if I so much as hint at such a wish. I am the only man left and she wants me at home in Hertfordshire in the vacation. Would you believe it, she went to see Father, to take him books and some wholesome food and they wouldn’t let her in. They said they’d give him her gifts, but she doesn’t trust them. It must be hell for him. He’s a man of action.”

“I do grieve for him and for your mother, and I am sure, Edward, that for her peace of mind you should do what she wants.”

“Even if she’s wrong to ask it? You don’t obey
your
mother. You told me.”

It had been a relief to Nat to share the story of Daniel at long last. At College Edward was a genuine close friend, interested in everything about Nat and very proud and honoured to be the only person away from Darrowswick who knew about his great sorrow.

“I can’t say I’d pine for either of my sisters,” he admitted. “Pen never has much to say for herself and Herm has too much. We rub along but we’re not inseparable like you and Dan were.” Now he looked earnestly at Nat. “But don’t you think it would put your Mother right if you did bring those Hordens to justice? You wouldn’t need to ... you know ...
murder
them, but couldn’t you bring an action in law? You’re so much older now, you would know how to set about it.”

“I told you we did try due processes but nothing came of it. And now there is killing and looting and pillaging every day which is never addressed by such law as still runs. There is no hope of redress. Besides, my father thinks my mother will never now regain her full mind. I dread going home for Easter, but I should go, since it is so long since I saw them. Only I fear the sight of me will upset her again. Father’s letters say she is mostly docile except when she has bad dreams.”

“You could
say
you were going to exact vengeance, couldn’t you? Go to Northumberland but not
do
anything. It would be a kind lie if you told her you’d polished everyone off who was to blame for Daniel’s death.”

Nat smiled wistfully. Edward was young and ingenuous but he loved him. He needed a close confidant. He had always had Daniel at his side and though he couldn’t exchange ideas with him, they had shared a delight in the country and the wild life and the Bible stories which Nat used to read aloud to him. The new experience of Cambridge had helped to salve the wound at first, but now that was familiar he felt the ache of loss more sharply and he was glad of the sweet devoted friendship of Edward.