Princess at Sea (51 page)

Until the zephyr I had released brought a new scent to me: the biting smell of coin that lingered about Duncan's hands. He had been running his hands through the ransom the same way he was now running them through my hair.

His lips on mine suddenly went dead. They were warm, but the tenderness I felt was only in my mind. There was no spark in Duncan's thoughts for me. It was an act. The wind was right. He might have loved me, but he loved money more.

Gasping, I pushed away from him, falling back two steps before catching my balance. Duncan stared at me, standing with a wary caution in his simple clothes and mud-rimmed boots while he took in my cold face, as the hurt and pain crashed down anew on me. My eyes flicked to his hands, only now seeing Rylan's blue-stoned ring on his finger. He had won the wager. “You don't love me,” I said flatly.

Duncan tilted his head and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Well I'll be damned,” he whispered. “You can tell from a kiss after all.”

“You never really loved me,” I said louder. In my head, the wind agreed, wildly demanding I free it. It whipped my thoughts into a frenzy, promising it would take the hurt and pain away if I would free it. It would solve all my problems if I would let it go.

Turning his back on me, Duncan went to the fire and calmly started to pack his things. Tuck stomped, his eyes wild at the rising wind in the trees at the outskirts, moaning like a living thing. “Love?” he said, folding his bedroll and tying it to the frightened animal with a frayed string. “I don't know, Tess. Maybe someday I would have. I did enjoy kissing you. Too bad you're so straitlaced.” Rakish grin looking ugly, he pulled his second horse closer. “We could have had a lot more fun if that last kiss was any indication.”

Free me,
the wind soothed, hot and insistent.
I'll end your hurt and anger. Give me your will, and I'll give you justice. I can take his breath. I can still his heart . . .

I took a step forward, my fists at my side. “You never loved me.”

He glanced at me irately. “I like you, Tess. I really do whether you want to believe it or not. So if there's anything else you want to say, say it. I have to go.” He took Tuck's lead, giving him a knee in his ribs to get the horse to exhale before he cinched the riding pad tight.

Angry, I stepped closer until the fire was at my toes. “You heard Rylan hurting me.”

“Lan was ready to castrate me!” he said loudly, turning to show anger in his brown eyes. “I'm a cheat, not insane.” He draped the tarp across Tuck's back, and the flighty animal shied. “And I knew you and your magic could capture him. See? You're here and all right.”

Tears blurred my vision while the memory of the pain and hurt resounded in me. Around me, the swirling wind faltered. The need I had felt for Duncan to come and rescue me flooded back, making me feel stupid. I had made myself weak by expecting him to save me. I was a fool twice over. “Why?” I whispered, while the leaves stirred against the moss.

Kneeling by one of the satchels, Duncan shifted to put one foot flat on the ground. His elbow went out to rest on it. “Why did I do it?” he said, then chuckled. “The money. And it was easy, just waiting to be taken. You were easier to charm than a drunken barmaid. So hungry for love that you'd believe what you wanted to hear. And I gave you your fantasy, a clever man willing to sacrifice anything to please you. You should be thanking me. And this?” Straining, he stood with the first bag and put it on the unwilling Tuck. “This is mine. I earned it. You won't stop me from taking it; you love me.”

I could do nothing, frozen, when he led Tuck closer and put on a second bag to balance out the first. “And you always will,” Duncan said, his fingers slow as he tied the satchel to keep it from slipping. “You'll do anything for me.
You have
done everything for me. You got Contessa to jump to Lan's ship, you told me about the false letter, you even woke me up when Captain Jeck stole them. It took me forever to convince Lan to maroon you on that island instead of killing you outright, but I knew you'd find a way to get back to the capital to make that fool of a chancellor pay the ransom. I saved your life there.”

“Kavenlow didn't pay the ransom.” The numb feeling in my shoulder was creeping up to smother my thoughts. “I lied to him.” A quick intake of breath cleared the fog from me. I had betrayed Kavenlow's trust for Duncan's false love. “I lied to him for you.”

“That's what I mean!” Duncan exclaimed, the third bag going atop the unhappy second horse. “You did it all, Tess, just as I laid it out. And
that's
why you're going to stand there and watch while I ride out of here.”

Wind pulsing in time with my heart, I came closer.
Free me
the wind soothed.
No more pain, no more anger. Only the sweet bliss of nothing,
it promised insidiously.

My hands felt thick, so full of power I couldn't feel them. My pulse had quickened, sending venom into me. “I believed you,” I said as I took his arm, halting his next motion to put the last bag in place.

Duncan jerked to a stop, frowning as he looked at my hand on him. His face was harsh in the come-and-go light from the fire, flickering with the wind I was stirring up. I could feel the strength of his muscles beneath my grip. I could sense how it would feel to pour my hate and anger into him, stopping his heart and burning his flesh. How the clean wash of insanity would purge me of pain and shame.

The power swelled, and the wind screamed inside my head. My breath caught as I fought with my hurt, trying to find a reason. My legs shook, and my skin burned. The wind grew stronger with my magic.
Now
, it demanded, pulling my anger and sorrow together. The wind rose higher, beating at my will, demanding I free it so it could kill him. And I resisted.

I balanced on the cusp, wanting it, wanting to hurt him, wanting to see my emotions revenged. The wind in me howled in my head, taking my will and giving it direction, and with a gleeful surge of possession, washed my anger into my hands.

“No!” I exclaimed, jerking my hands from Duncan. Pain jarred through me as I fell to kneel beside his fire. My hands burned with the force of death, my hate rebounding upon me. It rolled under my skin, seeking an outlet. My eyes widened in fear. It had nowhere to go.

Kneeling in the dirt, my mouth opened, and I stared at the moon, realizing what I had unleashed. Inside my head, the wind sang in delight. It had promised me release, and it would deliver. It had won! It had won! I would die, and it would be free of me!

Panicking, I frantically twisted my thoughts, sending the burning hatred in me to fall upon the wind. The voice shrieked in agony. I stiffened, unable to scream when the strength of winter racked across my soul. An upwelling of heat flashed through me, an ocean tide of fire that rose and consumed.

From my knees, I fell to my hands. I struggled to breathe, feeling as if my mind was on fire. My hands clenched the dirt, and I ground shards of stone into me. Fire burned in my skull as the voice in me was burned to ash, hurting me in the process.

Tears blurring my sight, I took a gasping breath, then another.
I was alive?
Panting, I brought my head up, seeing past the ragged curtain of my stringy hair Duncan blissfully unaware of what had happened.
I was alive.
But the slow hum of chatter in my head was gone.
I was alive; the wind was dead.

I wouldn't kill Duncan for my mistake of trusting him. I was hurt and betrayed, but
I
allowed it to happen. I could live past the hurt. Killing him would mean I couldn't and that he had beaten me. Letting him live would mean he hadn't.

“Silly woman,” Duncan muttered, turning from fastening the last satchel, his once-pleasant face harsh and ugly. “Can't hear the truth without falling down in hysterics. You should have brought someone with you to cart you crying home to your fire.”

My head was pounding, and I felt light. Cleansed. He didn't even know I had almost killed him. Head bowing back to the earth while I gathered myself, I decided it didn't matter.

“What makes you think she's alone?” came a masculine voice behind the horses.

Tuck shied, the ringing thorns the only thing keeping the flighty horse from running away. Shocked, I pulled my gaze up from the dirt, shaking in spent energy. My breath slipped from me in dismay. Jeck. He had seen. He had seen everything.

Jeck let go of the lead of his horse and mine. Coming into the round hollow of stone, he stood before Duncan and me. He was dressed in his usual Misdev uniform minus his captain's insignia, looking confident and comfortable. His arms hung loosely at his sides, and the fire glinted on his wet boots. A sword hilt showed, and twin throwing knives were tucked into his belt.

I knelt on the ground, drained and feeling every inch the apprentice that I was. He was a real player, sent to pick up my slack, able to make the hard decisions that I continually balked at. I was twice the failure. Slowly, I got to my feet, disgraced. My hands were raw and red, burned from within.

Duncan fell back to his horses, grabbing their reins and making them nervous. “It's mine!” he shouted. “I earned it!”

“She caught you,” Jeck said softly. Not having even looked at me yet, he moved—a powerful arm jabbing out. Tuck jerked his head back in alarm as Duncan hunched over, gasping. “So you get nothing,” Jeck finished, catching Tuck's lead before the animal could bolt.

Jeck smirked when Duncan fell back against the broken curve of the tower, still struggling to breathe. Nudging the thief's pack open, he shuffled among Duncan's things until he pulled out a familiar-looking tin and tucked it inside his jerkin. By the tightness of his jaw, I knew it was his source of toxin, stolen before they marooned us on my boat and set it burning.

Expression empty, Jeck reached for Duncan. I took a quick breath, pulling myself out of my stupor. “Jeck,” I said, when he took his shoulder and yanked him forward. “Don't.”

Surprise pulled Jeck to me, his hand on the unresisting Duncan, still gasping in an awkward hunch. “He's going back for his hanging. He's a criminal and a thief, Tess. I saw you spare him. I thought it was for wisdom.” His brow rose, and he eyed me in the firelight. “You still care for him?”

My pulse pounded in my hurt hands as I stood before him. “You told me once there're ways to wreak revenge other than death, and some can serve a purpose.”

His brow rose higher, and I would swear that a smile threatened to quirk the corner of his mouth. “I'm listening,” he said softly—dangerously.

Duncan heard the threat in his voice, and he flicked a glance at me, taking his first clean breath. Blood slipped from the corner of his mouth, and I wondered if Jeck had broken something inside him. A devilish grin was on him, though a bit grim, and he eyed me sideways. He obviously thought I was going to plead for his freedom, believing I still loved him.

“Rylan is still free,” I said, and Duncan paled, every ounce of confidence washing away to leave only a thin man in a dirty shirt and damp knees.

“You didn't capture him?” Duncan said, coughing as he felt his ribs. “You were supposed to capture him. I sent you there so you would catch him!”

Clearly disgusted, Jeck pushed him down until his knees hit the dirt.

A flush of satisfaction warmed me, pulling me straighter. I hadn't danced quite the way he wanted when he pulled my strings, and now he was going to lose everything. A wicked smile came over me, and seeing it, Jeck's lips parted in question. “Rylan will find him,” I said. “And until he does, Duncan will spend his every waking moment looking over his shoulder, expecting a knife in his side.” I looked at Duncan with satisfaction. “It's not the life he thinks he bought with his lies. I saw Rylan in the streets. He's a day behind me.”

Duncan went even paler. Seeing it, Jeck nodded once sharply. “As you will it, Princess. You are as gracious as you are clever.”

I blinked at the dry sarcasm he laid on the word
gracious
as much as for the compliment that he followed it with.
He thought I was clever?

“Wait!” Duncan lurched to his feet. Jeck pushed him, and he sprawled on his back.

Turning from Duncan, Jeck led Tuck and the second horse laden with the ransom out of the hollow of firelight. Jy and Pitch nickered a welcome.

“Leave him his horse,” I said, and Jeck turned to look at me in exasperation.

“Thanks, Tess,” Duncan said, getting to his feet.

“It will make you easier to track,” I finished, and this time, Jeck did smile. Duncan looked from me to his horse in horror. He had trained the animal so well that unless he tied him down to starve, Tuck would follow him to the ends of the earth.

Grunting, Jeck flipped a knife from somewhere on his person, slicing through the knots. The sacks fell to the ground to make Tuck start and prance. “That's mine!” Duncan exclaimed when Jeck lifted one.

Jeck gave him a weary look. The firelight glinted on his sword's hilt as he took the bags one at a time and loaded down Pitch's saddle, then tied the remaining horses together. In a smooth, enviable motion, he vaulted to Jy's riding pad, extending a hand to help me mount before him.

My face lost all expression in shock. It was my prophetic dream.

I lifted my eyes to Jeck, and he nodded at my understanding. His eyes held a faint hint of respect, of appreciation for a well-played game, and the acceptance of my unique justice. Heart pounding, I brushed the last of the damp grit from me before I extended my arm. Jeck grasped my wrist instead of my burned hand, leaning to slip an arm about my waist and pull me smoothly into place. I sat before him, unsure and feeling unreal.
Oh God, it's the vision of the future drawn to life by the punta bite.