Pretend (57 page)

             
"Don't you have
any more
children?"

             
"No," he replied dryly.

             
"Oh."

             
"
Your mother and I
managed to keep our relationship secret for years but when I didn't show any interest in the woman that my dad kept bringing to my attention, I guess he became suspicious.
             
One of the nights that I ca
me to see you and your mother my father
sent someone to follow me. They saw me with you guys and told him everything," he said in a sad tone.

             
"What did your father do?" I asked.

             
"He forba
d
e
me from seeing you both. He said that it brought shame on the family and that it was not my destiny. It didn't matter how much I told him that I loved her, he just didn't care. I threatened to defy him but he said that he would take everything from me and I wouldn't take over the business w
hen he retired two years later."

             
"So
,
you left us for money," I said in an angry tone.

             
"No, it wasn't like that. I knew that I couldn't support you and your mom without any money. I needed to keep up the payments on the home that you both lived in and provide for you," he said.

             
"But you left," I said in a confused tone.

             
"Yes I had to, if he was to believe that we were no longer together, I had to leave. I begged him to see you guys one last time and
so he did. That was when
your mother
and I formulated our plan."

             
"Plan?"

             
"Yes, we planned to stay away from each other for two years whilst I awaited my father's retirement. I would keep sending her money, secretly to keep up with the payments in that time and then when my father had signed everything over to me, you would
both come home to live with me. He would have no longer had a say once I took over,
" he said in a disappointed tone.

             
"What went wrong?" I asked already knowing from his expression that something did.

             
"At some point my father must have discovered the secret transaction that I had set up to put money in
to
your mother's account every month and he just
stopped it. I never even knew that
he had stopped it for way o
ver a year
," he said as he placed his head in his hands.

             
My instinct was to rub his back,
to
tell him that everything was ok but I couldn't.

             
I was shocked. The very man that I had spent years being angry with may not have been exactly who I thought he was.

             
"What did you do when you found out?" I asked curiously.

             
"I lost it, got angry at my dad and told him to stick his inheritance and then I drove to you and your mom. I had no money, no job but I didn't care anymore
,
I just wanted to be with my family," he said sadly.

             
"I remember how excited I was to run up to the door, wait for your mom to open it and then throw her into my arms and tell
her that we could be together at last. I didn’t have a plan but I would have made it work, somehow."

             
"That didn't happen though," I said as I knew that something sad was on its way.

             
"No it didn't. I sat outside of your house for forty five minutes. I guess I was nervous, I didn't know what to say or where to
begin. Just as I went to get out
of
the car, the front door swung open and a man came out and before I could even take in the situation or wonder
who
he was, your mom kissed him. I watched her body language and the way
that
she looked at him and I knew that she loved him, I could tell. She just looked...Happy. Then you came running out, you were nine by then and had your blonde hair up in a bun. You were beautiful, I
remember
looking
at you
and thinking how could I have missed all of this. The
n the man picked you up and you
threw you arms around his neck and kissed him on the cheek just as a litt
le girl should with her father."

He stopped to take a breath.

             
Bob was the man he had seen, it all made sense.

             
"I knew then that I was too late. Your mom obviously thought that I had stopped sending the money and had forgotten about her and so she moved on. I couldn't blame her, asking her to wait for two years was selfish," he said sadly.

             
"She didn't know all of this, I know she didn't. She spent so much time crying and hoping that you would come back, I remember it so clearly. After a while, I guess she just gave up," I said in a sympathetic voice.

             
"Yeah, I guess she did
."

             
"What did you do then?"

             
"I drove away. I drove for hours just trying to piece everything together, I knew that it was my fault and I just couldn't turn back the clock. I kept that image of you three at the door step that day and I vowed that I would never come back and spoil that for you.
So instead I went back home, begged my father to take me back and continued living a miserable life.
Your mother was a wonderful woman and she deserved happiness more than anyone that I knew. So I made a pr
omise that I would let you both
be happy and stay away," he replied.

             
"That wasn't
necessarily
the best thing," I said in a sad voice.

             
"I know but I was young and I did what I felt was right. If I ever thought that either of you would have missed me like I missed you
,
I woul
d have never left that day. There
wasn't a moment that I didn't think about you both," he said as he stared at me with love in his eyes.

             
How could I stay mad at someone who had so much love in their heart?
I couldn't.

             
"I forgive you," I mumbled quietly as I stared down at my lap.

             
"Thank you," he said as he threw me a small smile.

             
"I still don't understand something though," I said as I looked up at his face.

             
"What?"

             
"You came back. You said that you promised to stay away. Why now? Why nine years later?" I asked in a confused tone.

             
"I knew
that
you would ask this and it's only fair that you know. April, I have wanted to come back and see you more times than I can even count. The amount of times that I sat in my car and planned to just come and tell you this story, but I couldn't. I didn't know how to," he replied.

             
"What changed?"

             
"Me, I changed. I may not have much time left and I couldn't leave with you thinking that I didn't love you because I do, I love you more than I lo
ve anyone in this entire world."

             
"You're going away?" I asked, sadly.

             
“No.”

             
“Then, what?”
I asked in a sad voice.

             
"I have cancer April," he said in a solemn voice.

             
"What?" I gasped as the words struggled to sink in.

             
"I'm starting treatment on Monday but it doesn't always work. That's why it was important for me to talk to you first, to make peace," he replied.
I couldn't even take in the words. It was like I had just met him and he was being taken away again.

             
"Everything I own, my estate, cars, money, properties, all of it is yours," he said.

             
"I don't want money," I said as I held back the tears.

             
"I know but you're my daughter and I want you to have it. I have always
intended for it to go that way."

             
"I'm sorry that I thought so badly of you," I whispered.

             
"It's not your
fault.
I couldn't expect you to think anything else. I just wanted you to know the truth before...Well whilst I still ha
d the chance to tell it to you."

             
"What about my mom?"

             
"I will tell her when the ti
me is right. She's away, right?"

             
"Yeah
,
how did you know?"

             
"I hired a private investigator that's how I knew where you were, I thought that you may h
ave moved house but you didn't."

             
"No
,
we didn't.
So
what now?"
I asked.

             
"That's up to you," he replied.

             
"I need time
for this to all sink
in
but
I would like to do this again if you would of course," I said as I felt my cheeks become hotter.

             
"There is nothing that I would love more," he said as he smiled at me.

* * *

             
Ed and I spent hours talking and laughing at different stories that we bot
h told. It felt nice and yet st
range to say that I was sat in a car chatting and laughing with my dad. It's every little girl's dream and if it's not then it was certainly mine. I didn't want to think about the cancer right now, not whilst I felt so happy. I would face that later.

             
"Just here," I said as I pointed towards Aiden and Crystal's house.

             
"Ok, well I really enjoyed myself today," Ed said as he smiled at me.

             
"Me too," I replied in a quiet voice.

             
"Right, well you have my number so if you need anything at all then don't hesitate to ask," he said.

             
"I won't. Bye Ed," I said as I got out of the car.

             
"Bye April," he replied.

             
Bye dad, I said in my head as I watched him drive away.
 

             
I stood in silence for a few minutes as I smiled at the empty space where he was just parked. It seemed crazy that someone that made me so angry for so long could make me feel so happy.

             
"Hey," a voice said from behind me.

             
"Hi," I said as I looked up at Aiden's concerned face.

             
"Everything go ok?" He asked.

             
"Crystal called me and told me about Ed," he said before I could question him.

             
"Oh, yeah it went....Well great," I said as I continued to smile.

             
"Good, I'm glad to hear. Come on," he said as he
took my hand and
led me inside of the house.

             
"
Is
Crystal still out with Cameron?" I asked as I took in the silence of the house.

             
"No
,
she's gone to help Murphy get some things together for the party tomorrow," he replied.

             
"Oh, how come you didn't go?"

             
"I was waiting for you just in case you needed me," he said with a serious face.

             
"That's really sweet," I said as I wrapped my arms around his neck and looked into his eyes.

             
"How sweet?"
He asked with a smirk on his face.

             
"
Erm
-"