Poseidon (The God Chronicles) (3 page)

The waves pushed me back down whenever I would get close to surfacing, bouncing me against the rocks and preventing me from coming out of my haze. The need to breathe was overwhelming, my
lungs burning from lack of oxygen. Finally, my body went into survival mode. My arms started moving and I kicked off one of the boulders the best that I could. Unfortunately, I also sucked a mouthful of water into my lungs.

Once the first
swallow was in, it was like I couldn’t stop. I kept gulping water down, trying in vain to get air. My chest felt like it was going to burst. Losing strength, I slowly stopped moving. In a last desperate attempt, I tried to shove off of the stones around me again. All I succeeded in doing was getting my foot stuck.

Consciousness
was drifting away ... My lungs were full of liquid and every part of me felt too heavy to even try and move. When I closed my eyes, I saw John.

Maybe we would be together after all. I didn’t necessarily want to die, but if I was going to
perish now, at least he would be there waiting for me on the other side. I wouldn’t have to be alone any more.

I was vaguely aware of the
sea swirling around me in a way it hadn’t before. Air started to hit me and I weakly tried to take a breath. It was too late though—the water had taken up all the room in my lungs.

I felt like I was floating on my back, water covering me there
and air brushing over my front, but my foot was still stuck in the rocks. Somewhere in my mind, I registered that as being impossible. With my last bit of strength, I fluttered my eyes open.

The man in front of me was majestic. The ocean
spun around him—us—and I swear I heard it whispering to him. He was talking to me, but I couldn’t understand anything he was saying. I coughed weakly, some water coming up.

The man suddenly slapped his open hand on my chest and jerked it away like he’d been burned. The water in my lungs seemed to follow his hand as I heaved it up and sputtered, gasping. The water started closing in on us
, and my mind finally went dark.

“Somebody call an ambulance!”

My body
was freezing. And somehow I’d managed to get sand in my pants.

“Is she breathing?”

“What happened?”

My throat hurt. Why was that? I was pretty sure I was laying down, too. I tried to sit up, but everything hurt. What the heck?

“They’re on the way. It should only be a couple more minutes.”

“We need to cover her up, her lips are turning blue,” a gruff voice said.

Finally. I felt strong enough to at least open my eyes.

What I could see of the sky was grey
—the crowd of people around me blocked out everything else.

“She’s waking up!” one of them said.

Another person’s face filled my view. He was soaking wet, his hair dripping onto my face. Astonishingly blue eyes stared into mine, looking for who knows what.

“Do you know what just happened?” he asked.

“No?” I rasped out. “Do you?”

“Only that you almost drowned.” He smiled apologetically and then looked up at something.

“Everyone out of the way,” he continued. “Let them do their job. We can’t do anything else for her.”

Soon I was strapped to a backboard, rolled into the back of an ambulance, and racing down the road while being poked and prodded.

“Can you tell me your name?” the paramedic asked.

“
Audrey,” I rasped again.

“
Audrey what?”

“
Audrey Willis.”

“Al
l right, Audrey. My name is Mike. We’re going to take good care of you. Do you remember what happened?”

“Not really,” I admitted.

“Okay. How are you feeling now?”

I then proceeded to answer the next several questions the best I could. The most infuriating part was that they had taped my head down as well. I couldn’t even look at Mike unless he leaned right over the top of me.

When we arrived at the hospital I answered several more questions, all while being poked with needles, moved into an emergency room bed, and still not able to move my head. When they called Mom—my new emergency contact—I could hear her panicked, high-pitched voice from across the hall. After several tests that I couldn’t even remember the names of, I was admitted for monitoring. 

All
anyone would tell me was I’d almost drowned. I couldn’t remember anything no matter how hard I tried.  

“Mom, for the last time, I didn’t try to kill myself!” I sighed exasperatedly.

“How do you know if you can’t remember what happened, Audrey?” She hadn’t left my side since she’d arrived, literally. She had taken up residence in the chair next to the bed I’d been sequestered in, sobbing and trying to interrogate an answer that didn’t exist out of me.

T
hree days have passed since my accident. I knew everyone was thinking I’d tried to end my own life, especially after Mom had filled them in about everything I’d been going through. She especially thought that losing the baby had pushed me over the edge. I knew I hadn’t done anything though—I wanted to live, is spite of everything. 

“Your doctor agrees with me,” she said lovingly.

“About what?”

“We think that you should spend some time in a rehabilitation cent—“

“Mom, I’m not on drugs!” I said incredulously. “I have absolutely no reason going to rehab!”

“Not that kind of rehab,” she said hurriedly. “
Simply a nice place where you can relax, be taken care of, and overcome these feelings that you’re having. I know that you need to mourn the loss of your family, but I want to see you feeling better as well.” She patted my hand, tears forming in her eyes. “I just love you so much, sweetheart. You’ve been through more than most people could handle in such a short time, no one would judge or blame you for doing this.”

“I didn’t try to drown myself,” I said through gritted teeth.

“It’s okay to admit that you need help,” she urged.

“She’s telling the truth,” a voice said from the doorway.

I looked over to a man who—while strangely familiar—was a stranger. His short, brown hair was wet and slicked back, like he’d just been swimming. His white t-shirt and blue board shorts suggested he’d been doing just that.

“She slipped. I saw the whole thing,” he continued.

“And you are?” Mom asked politely.

“They call me Sy,” he
answered, coming in and shaking Mom’s outstretched hand. He then turned to shake mine as well. “I’m glad to see that you’re recovering nicely.”

After looking into his eyes, I finally remembered him.

“You’re the man from the beach, right? The one who asked me if I remembered what happened.”

“Yes,” he smiled softly. “I was the one who pulled you out of the water. Do you remember?”

“No, I don’t,” I told him apologetically. “Thank you very much though.” Was that relief I saw on his face?

“Yes, thank you—thank you!” Mom said through a few tears, missing whatever it was that had just dashed across
Sy’s features. “We would have lost her if not for you. How can we ever repay you?”

“I just saw someone in trouble and came to help,” Sy said, holding his hands up. “No payment required.”   

“Why are you here now, if you don’t mind my asking?” I asked, curiously.

“Everyone was talking about the girl who tried to kill herself by
jumping into the ocean,” he laughed. “I figured I should come share what I saw.”

“Well, thank you for that as well.” The light drumming that signaled a beginning of a headache was starting at the back of my head. I’d been diagnosed with a pretty severe concussion that made for some bad
pain, but at least I wasn’t going to be forced to deal with them in rehab now.

“You okay, sweetheart?” Mom asked. I hadn’t realized I’d gone quite for a few minutes.

“Yeah, just tired. My head is starting to hurt, too.” I smiled weakly.

“That sounds like my cue to leave,” Sy said.
“Would you like me to send your nurse in on my way out?”

“Thank you. For everything.” I smiled warmly. He reminded me of John a little—always polite, considerate, and now—literally—my lifesaver.

John. I felt so empty without him. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do or where to go from here. Every time I’d tried to figure it out, the pain was too much for me to handle. A future without him felt impossible and I was being forced to realize my greatest fears.

As Sy left the room and Mom fiddled with the blinds, I decided to concentrate on just me. My life was different now—there would be no going back. There was time to
mourn, and then there would be time to pick up the pieces. 

Chapter Four

One year later

“Well, it does get easier I suppose. The pain is always there, tucked away under everything else, but it's manageable.”

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, the heat of twenty-four eyes burning my skin. They all looked so engaged, especially Mary, the therapist I had been meeting with one on one for the past eight months.

Mom had been right to suggest I get help. The only difference was I didn't need suicide counseling
—grief had taken over every part of my life in the months following my discharge from the hospital in California. Living on my own, surrounded by the remains of my former life, felt like a constant battering of my fragile being. I had nowhere to go since my boss insisted I take a leave of work. It was a miracle if I even got out of bed most days.

“How wonderful,
Audrey.” Mary smiled as she stood from the chair next to me and walked to the center of the circle. “Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I knew you would be a great help to our group.” Several members nodded in agreement, one of them even wiping a tear away.

“As we all just heard,” Mary continued, slowly turning to face each section of the circle as she spoke. “
Audrey has been through a lot in the past year. She could have let it overwhelm her, she could have given in and done something that would have hurt those around her even more. But she didn't! She got help and she picked up what was left of her life. And here she is today, strong, independent, and doing everything she can to move forward with her life.”

A round of applause broke out as she finished and I squirmed some more in my seat. I hadn't chosen group therapy for myself, because I didn't want everyone else's opinions on what I should do with my life. I already had that at home, with every fam
ily member trying to tell me what I needed to feel better. So I'd chosen just to speak with Dr. Young-Mary-and it was exactly what I'd felt I needed.

The group began to break up and leave, some of them staying to talk with Mary, other's stopping to shake
my hand as they headed toward the door. When everyone else had finally gone, Mary turned to me.

“So, how did that feel
Audrey?” She smiled softly and sat back down in the chair next to me.

“It was pretty much what I expected
. . . and also not,” I laughed. “I knew it would be hard to drag all of that stuff back up to the surface, but it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. There weren't any panicked feelings and I didn't feel uncomfortable sharing everything. I still feel sad, but it wasn't too much. You know?”

“That’s wonderful! And I do.
You have made such progress Audrey. I'm so proud of you.” She grasped my hand as she spoke, happiness radiating from her. “I think you helped the people here today, too. Thank you for coming to speak.”

“It wasn't a big deal,” I said sheepishly. “I want to help other people. I know what it feels like to be in that place.”

“That's very nice of you.” She smiled again, patting the top of my hand before she let go and stood up. “I'm so sorry, but I have another appointment I need to get to.”

“That's totally fine, of course!” I stood as well, picking my purse up off the floor and straightening my skirt. “I'll see you at our appointment next month.”

“Sounds wonderful.” She smiled at me again as I gathered my things, and then headed off to wherever she was going.

Alone in the room, I took an extra breath to steady myself. Sharing about John really hadn't been as traumatic as I'd thought it would be, but I still felt shaken some.

My heels clicked on the pavement as I walked to my car, the summer heat sizzling around me, like I was bacon in a frying pan. I quickly opened the door and slid into the driver's seat. The windshield cover had kept the interior of my vehicle from heating to Hellish levels, but the air conditioning was a gift from Heaven all the same.

“You'd think I'd be used to the heat after all these years,” I muttered to myself.  Arizona was always two extremes; one day it could be over one hundred degrees and that night it would be below zero.