Point of Retreat (4 page)

“That’s a dumb question,” I say.

“There’s no such thing as a dumb question,” she says. “You should know that,
Mr. Cooper
.” She leans forward and kisses me, then pulls back and starts to loosen the edge of the package. I watch as she tears it open, revealing a cardboard box wrapped in duct tape.

“My god, there has to be six layers of duct tape on here,” she says sarcastically. “Kind of like your car.” She looks up and gives me a sly grin.

“Funny,” I say.

I stroke her knee and watch her poke through the tape with her thumbnail. Just when she breaks through the final edge, she pauses.

“Thank you for doing this for her,” she says. “For keeping the gift.” She looks back down at it and holds it without opening it. “Do you know what it is?” she asks.

“No clue. I’m hoping it’s not a puppy-it’s been under my bed for four months.”

She laughs. “I’m nervous,” she says. “I really don’t want to cry again.” She hesitates before she finally opens the top of the box and folds the flaps back. She pulls the contents out of the box as I pull the cardboard away from it. She tears the tissue away and reveals a clear glass vase. Inside the vase, it’s full to the brim with geometrical stars in a variety of colors. It looks like origami. Hundreds of thumbnail sized 3-D paper stars.

“What is it?” I ask her.

“I don’t know, but it’s beautiful,” she says. We continue to stare at it, trying to make sense of the gift and the contents inside of it. She opens the card and looks at it. “I can’t read it, Will. You’ll have to read it.” She places it into my hands.

I open it and read it aloud.

Will and Lake,

Love is the most beautiful thing in the world. Unfortunately, it’s also one of the hardest things in the world to hold on to, and one of the easiest things to throw away.

Neither of you has a mother or a father to go to for relationship advice anymore. Neither of you has anyone to go to for a shoulder to cry on when things get tough, and they will get tough. Neither of you has someone to go to when you just want to share the funny, or the happy, or the heartache. You are both at a disadvantage when it comes to this aspect of love. You both only have each other, and because of this, you will have to work harder at building a strong foundation for your future together. You are not only each other’s love; you are also one another’s sole confidant.

I hand wrote some things onto strips of paper and folded them into stars. It might be an inspirational quote, an inspiring lyric, or just some downright good parental advice. I don’t want you to open one and read it until you truly feel you need it. If you have a bad day, if the two of you fight, or if you just need something to lift your spirits…that’s what these are for. You can open one together; you can open one alone. I just want there to be something both of you can go to, if and when you ever need it.

Will…thank you. Thank you for coming into our lives. So much of the pain and worry I’ve been feeling has been alleviated by the mere fact that I know my daughter is loved by you.

Lake takes my hand when I come to a pause. I wasn’t expecting Julia to address me personally. She wipes away a tear from her eyes. I do my best to fight back my own tears. I take a deep breath and clear my throat, then finish reading the letter.

You are a wonderful man, and you’ve been a wonderful friend to me. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for loving my daughter like you do. You respect her, you don’t need to change for her, and you inspire her. You can never know how grateful I have been for you, and how much peace you have brought my soul.

And Lake; this is me-nudging your shoulder, giving you my approval. You couldn’t have picked anyone better to love if I would have hand-picked him myself. Also, thank you for being so determined to keep our family together. You were right about Kel needing to be with you. Thank you for helping me see that. And remember, when things get tough for him, please teach him how to stop carving pumpkins…

I love you both and wish you a lifetime of happiness together.

-Julia

“
And all around my memories, you dance...” ~The Avett Brothers

I put the card back inside the envelope and watch as Lake rubs her hands across the glass, spinning it around to view it from all angles. “I saw her making these once. When I walked into her room, she was folding strips of paper up and she stopped and put it aside as we talked. I forgot about it. I forgot all about it. This must have taken her forever.”

She stares at the stars and I stare at her. She wipes more tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. She’s holding it together well, all things considered.

“I want to read them all, but at the same time I hope we never need to read them at
all,
” she says.

I lean forward and give her a quick kiss. “You are as amazing as your mother.” I take the vase out of her hands and walk it to the dresser and set it down. Lake takes the box and shoves the wrapping paper inside and sets it on the floor. She puts the card on the table, and then lies back on the bed. I lie down beside her, turn toward her and rest my arm over her waist. “You okay?” I ask her. I can’t tell if she’s sad.

She looks at me and smiles. “I thought it would hurt to hear her words again, but it didn’t. It actually made me happy,” she says.

“Me too,” I say. “I was really worried it was a puppy.”

She laughs and lays her head on my arm. We lay there in silence watching each other. I run my hand up her arm and trace her face and neck with my fingertips. I love watching her think.

She eventually lifts her head off my arm and slides on top of me, placing her hands on the back of my neck. She leans in and slowly parts my lips with hers. I become quickly consumed by the taste of her lips and the feel of her warm hands. I wrap my arms around her and run my fingers through her hair as I return her kiss. It’s been so long since we’ve been alone together without the possibility of being interrupted. I hate being in this predicament-but then again I love being in this predicament. Her skin is so soft, her lips are perfect. It gets harder and harder to retreat every time.

She runs her hands underneath my shirt and lightly teases my neck with her mouth. She knows this drives me crazy, yet she’s been doing it more and more lately. I think she likes pushing her boundaries. One of us needs to retreat…and I don't know if I can bring myself to do it. Apparently, neither can she.

“How much time do we have?” she whispers. She lifts up my shirt and her lips make their way down to my chest.

“Time?” I say weakly.

“Until the boys get home.” She slowly kisses her way back up to my neck again. “How long do we have until they get home?” She brings her face back to mine and looks at me. I can see by the look in her eyes that she’s telling me she’s not retreating.

I bring my arm over my face and cover my eyes. I try to talk myself down. This isn’t how I want it to be for her.
Think about something else, Will. Think about college, homework, puppies in cardboard boxes…anything.

She pulls my arm away from my face so she can look me in the eyes. “Will…it’s been a year. I
want
to.”

I roll her onto her back and prop my head up on my elbow and lean in toward her, stroking her face with my other hand. “Lake, believe me…I’m ready, too. But not here. Not right now. You’ll just have to go home in an hour when the boys get back and I don’t think I could take it.” I kiss her on the forehead. “In two weeks we get a three day weekend…we’ll go away together. Just the two of us. I’ll see if my grandparents will watch the boys and we can spend the whole weekend together.”

She kicks her legs up and down on the bed, frustrated. “I can’t
wait
two more weeks! We’ve been waiting fifty-seven weeks already!”

I laugh at her childishness and lean in, planting a kiss on her cheek. “If
I
can wait, you can
definitely
wait,” I assure her.

She rolls her eyes. “God, you’re such a bore,” she teases.

“Oh, I’m a bore?” I say. “You want me to throw you in the shower again? Cool you off? I will if that’s what you need.”

“Only if you get in with me,” she says. Her eyes grow wide and she sits up and pushes me flat on my back, leaning over me. “Will!” she says excitedly as a new realization dawns on her. “Does that mean we can take showers together? On our getaway?”

Her eagerness surprises me. Everything she
does
surprises me. “You aren’t nervous?” I ask her.

“No, not at all.” She smiles and leans in closer. “I know I’ll be in good hands.”

“You will definitely be in good hands,” I say, pulling her to me. Just when I’m about to kiss her again, my phone vibrates. She reaches into my pocket and pulls it out.

“Gavin,” she says. She hands the phone to me and rolls off.

I read the text. “Great, Kel threw up. They think he has a stomach bug so they’re bringing them home.”

She groans and gets off the bed. “Ugh! I hate vomit! Caulder’s probably gonna get it too-the way they pass crap back and forth.”

“I’ll text him back and tell him to take Kel to your house. You go home and wait-I’ll run to the store and get him some medicine.” I pull my shirt back on and grab the vase that Julia made us so that I can put it on the bookshelf in the living room. We exit the bedroom in parent mode.

“Get some soup, too. For tomorrow. And some sprite,” she says.

When I set the vase down in the living room, she reaches her hand inside and grabs a star. She sees me eyeing her and she grins. “There might be a good tip in here. For vomit,” she says.

“We’ve got a long road ahead of us, you better not waste those.” When we walk outside, I grab her arm and pull her to me and hug her goodnight. “You want me to drive you home?”

She laughs and hugs me back. “Thanks for my date. It was one of my favorites.”

“The best is yet to come,” I say, hinting at our upcoming getaway.

“I’m holding you to that.” She backs away and starts walking toward her house. I turn to the car and open the door when she yells from across the street.

“Will! One more time?”

“I love you, Lake!”

January 7
^th
, 2012

I butterflying
hate
cheeseburgers.

Chapter 3

Hell. Pure hell is the best way I can describe the last twenty-four hours. By the time Gavin and Eddie made it home with the boys, it was apparent that Kel didn’t have a stomach bug after all. Gavin didn’t knock when he ran through the front door and headed straight for the bathroom. Caulder was next, then Lake and Eddie. I was the last to feel the effects of the food poisoning. Caulder and I have done nothing but lay on the couch, taking turns in the bathroom since midnight last night.

I can’t help but envy Kiersten. I should have just had bread, too. About the time that thought crosses my mind, there’s a knock at the front door. I don’t get up. I don’t even speak. No one I know extends me the courtesy of knocking, so I don’t know who could be at the door. I guess I won’t find out, either…because I’m not moving.

I’m lying on the couch facing away from the door, but I hear it slowly open and can feel the cold air circulate as a female voice I don’t recognize calls my name.

“Will?”

I still don’t care who it is. At this point, I’m wishing it was someone here to finish me off…put me out of my misery. It takes all the energy I have to just raise my hand in the air to let whoever it is know that I’m here.

“Oh, you poor thing,” she says. She shuts the door behind her and walks around to the front of the couch and stares down at me. I glance up at her and realize I have absolutely no idea who this woman is. She’s probably in her forties...her short black hair is traced with grey. She’s petite, shorter than Lake. I try to smile, but I don’t think I do. She frowns and glances over to Caulder, who is passed out on the other couch. I notice a bottle between her hands when she passes through the living room and walks into the kitchen. I hear her opening drawers, and she comes back with a spoon.

“This will help. Layken said you guys were sick, too.” She pours some of the liquid into a spoon and bends down, handing the spoon to me.

I take it. I’ll take anything at this point. I swallow the medicine and cough when it burns the inside of my throat. I reach for a glass of water and take a sip. I don’t want to drink too much, it’s just been coming right back up. “What the hell
is
that?” I ask.

She looks disappointed at my reaction. “I made it. I make my own medicine. It’ll help, I promise.” She walks over to Caulder and shakes him awake. He accepts the medicine as I did without question, then closes his eyes again.

“I’m Sherry, by the way. Kiersten’s mother.”

That explains it.

“She said you guys ate some rancid meat.” She makes a face when she says the word ‘meat.’