Playing with Monsters (24 page)

Chapter Thirty

I watched through my lashes as Lucian and his men poured thick black salt behind where we assembled around the fire pit shrouded in ceremonial robes and nothing else. Between the salt, postulants and fire, we must have looked like a gigantic target from above. The whole thing seemed off to me, that Lucian and his men were here, as no one was welcome at the Awakening ceremony unless they were an already awakened witch of the coven, or a postulant.

When I spotted him, Kendra leaned close to me and whispered that he and his men were here for our protection against any demons who might be attracted to the power that this ceremony would generate. Evidently, Helen had also been making it abundantly clear to anyone who might be listening, that it was she who had brought them here for our protection, with a donation from her, of course.

I watched silently as torches were lit and placed outside the circle, one at each point to signify the elements of nature. Quartz crystals for protection had been woven into the fire pit and amber, coral, and petrified wood pieces were added to the fire, creating colorful flames as spells were whispered to intensify the incantation carved into the crystals. The scents of sage, lemon grass, hibiscus, sandalwood, and vanilla tickled my nose as these elements were added to the giant cauldron that bubbled merrily in the center of the fire. A few of Lucian’s men monitored each torch, but he wasn’t watching them, or ensuring they were performing their duties correctly; his eyes were on me.

I could feel the heat from the torches and from the fire, and even nervousness contributed to the sweat that dripped down the back of my neck. He knew as well as I did, that there would be no chance between us. Not with the events already in motion. There were no do-overs; I was locked into my fate, one that had been a tradition for the coven for centuries.

That dismal knowledge sat like a boulder on my chest, especially with the heat of Lucian’s eyes weighing on me. I wanted to grab him, a strip of rope, and handfast the sick twisted freak right here and now, no matter what kind of kinky fuckery he was into. Just skip the entire Harvest and be somewhere, lost in those midnight eyes of his. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and turned to find Kendra staring at me curiously.

“Are you okay?” she whispered softy, as not to be heard or disrupt the ceremony.

“I’m fine,” I lied as more sweat beaded at the base of my neck. I felt the heat, mixed with the knowledge that this was it. I was going to get my powers; however, I was also about to be mated and it wasn’t by him, and that just sucked. At best, I’d be stuck with the same man for a few weeks until the moon phase passed and then I’d be allowed to have whatever sexual partner I wanted. Unless I ended up pregnant, which luckily I’d taken steps to avoid.

“You are
not
fine,” she hissed. “Magdalena, your emotions are all over the place.”

“Something’s not right,” I whispered. Something wasn’t, I could feel my body pulsating, and it was all pushing to one place…my vagina.

“It’s the Awakening, and the Harvest spells because both events are together. You’re supposed to feel like that,” she said with a worried look. “Horny, while on fire,” she smiled. “You missed that part because of Cassidy’s bullshit.”

“What?” I hissed. Fucking great! I was on fire, burning up with an emotion I couldn’t fathom. It felt like fire ants were biting me everywhere! I felt as if my skin was on fire, and moisture was pooling between my legs, and I kept fucking looking at Lucian, because he could make it stop. My hands trembled, and I fisted them against my sides to hide the violent reaction I was having. Everyone else was standing around, and I was shaking. They looked calm, collected, I was a freaking mess! “I’m dying,” I mumbled.

“Some experience it on a massive level, others tend to handle it…” she paused, looking at me carefully. “…better.”

Awesome-sauce! I was handling it like shit!

My eyes found Lucian’s; heat banked in their depths, as if he could sense my brutal arousal, and itched to fix it. I itched for him to do so, quickly.

Another set of quartz crystals was being placed around the ground, surrounding the wide salt circle, and I wanted to run away. Someone else dropped a handful of sea salt into the cauldron; a few clear quartz crystals were placed into the mixture as well, and then chanting began from the singular witch who stirred the contents of the cauldron. With each herb that was added, the fire inside of me burned hotter.

“I’m going to pass out,” I announced as sweat beaded on my brow line.

“Lena, are you okay?” Kat whispered and I turned to look at her. My hair was saturated, sweat was actually running down the side of my face and neck, and I felt sick.

I felt a hand touch my shoulder, and without turning to see who it was, I knew it was Tabitha.

“Breathe, Magdalena, you’re going to be just fine,” she whispered, and a cooling breeze moved around me, causing the hooded robe I wore to catch air. It felt amazing. “You are showing signs of much power, indeed. Those who harbor the most, unfortunately also suffer the most.”

I felt Kendra tense beside me, and felt the jealousy stir inside of her. Our entire lives, I’d allowed her to think I had never felt my powers, not after the few incidents where I’d been in trouble for using it. As firstborn, she was the favored one to be more powerful, but she seemed to be weathering the Awakening spells just fine. Or more to the point, the pre-Awakening, or pre-Harvest, or whatever they wanted to call it; we hadn’t even gotten through the protection spells!

“Tonight we welcome the newest members of the coven; tonight, we awaken the next generation of our bloodlines,” one of the male elders announced as someone else passed out runes that were a mossy green color and had three connecting rings carved in them, symbolizing the connection of the new witches among the coven. Next were the shiny black Y-engraved runes for women and ones with arrows for men, then the iridescent white Harvest runes, blessing for a fruitful union. Last but not least, the vivid blue veil runes with an eye carved beautifully into the smooth surface were placed in our palms, to allow the dead to know who among us could be selected for both rituals.

Flames erupted and the popping noise as the protection barrier slipped into place around us caused more than a few of us to jump. Nervous laughter filled the circle, and one by one we were moved closer to the edge of the circle and asked to kneel and place our stones in front of us.

I felt a chill racing through the circle and as we watched, flickering silhouettes began to take form within the circle, until five figures materialized where small circles had been carved into the earth. At first, the figures were diaphanous, but as they remained frozen in place, they began to take on color and life.

The first one to move was more than beautiful, she was gorgeous, with raven colored hair and green, jewel like eyes. She held her hand out to a redhead, and then a brunette, who held hers to a blonde, who looked up at a man with black hair and light blue eyes who was still forming. He smiled at her, and she waited patiently as he continued to take solid form. He finally moved, and bluebells grew from the ground wherever they stepped as they moved from their circles.

They bowed to the elders, and each one set off, inspecting the young women and men who formed the circle. I watched the new arrivals as they slowly took in each of the postulants as the elders moved around us, placing mortar and pestles in front of us. The elders then moved through our groups, using a small blade to slice through the tip of our left index finger so that we could place a few droplets of our blood into the bowls, along with the runes, and crush them as we were being inspected by the dead.

The crushing of the runes wasn’t quiet, but it was a welcome distraction from the dead who would nod in a certain postulant’s direction as they watched us work. I lifted my head as the raven haired woman moved towards me, her eyes on the bowl. When she looked at me, it was as if she couldn’t even see me. I looked around and then back at her as I watched her reach down into the mortar I’d stopped working so she touched the blood. She brought it up to her nose and turned her face to Kendra with a smile.
Weird.

I ignored it and went back to smashing the crystals into my blood to finish the mixture. When it was done, I sat back on my knees and watched as the dead continued to examine the others. They were looking at them, whereas when they were looking at me, they looked through me, as if they couldn’t see me.

My heart raced with the uncertainty of emotions that swirled through me. They had to have seen me; it wasn’t like I was invisible, right?

I looked at Lucian, who was no longer staring at me, but at one of the witches who had been brought back from the dead for the Awakening, the raven haired one. She was beautiful, though, and I didn’t blame him for staring at her. She was dressed in a black satin dress that hugged her form. Jewels were set in a makeshift crown with long golden chains that flowed intricately though her hair and created a necklace with a crescent moon that hung to her waist. Her hair flowed invitingly to her slim hips, and her lips were painted crimson red. She was perfect, nothing was out of place. Being dead hadn’t been hard on her, obviously. She looked happy, which was a lot better than I looked right now.

Something dark passed over Lucian’s features and the woman lifted her eyes and looked around the circle as if she’d felt him. It was physically impossible, since he was outside the circle, on the other side of the barrier. Those sinful midnight blue eyes moved from hers to mine, and back. I felt a tightening of nerves and maybe a little jealousy as he sought hers again. Today was really starting to suck, but at least the fire that had been racing through my body had been momentarily put out.

One after another, the blood in the mortars was tasted and hands were held out to help the postulants from the ground to join the circle of those who were being selected to be awakened. I watched as more and more were moved into the growing circle, until only a few of us on the far side remained.

I smiled as the man walked towards me, but much like the others, he looked through me and then around. He kneeled down and tilted his head, as if trying to see something. I felt my heart begin to hammer against my ribcage as he reached down to sample the blood. I turned to look at Kendra, who was being helped from the ground and moved into the circle.

The man moved his hand, pushing it through my chest which sent pain mingled with an iciness that felt as if I was being torn apart. He pulled it back and slowly got up, looking around before he moved to the next girl.

What the actual fuck! That shit had hurt like hell!

Wait, had he just…I felt angry tears burning my eyes as it dawned on me. I hadn’t been selected…I looked at my mother who stood with her mouth open; my grandmother had a frown on her face as she tried to puzzle out what had happened.

“What happened,” I whispered brokenly. “I…don’t understand.”

Tears dropped and I rubbed at them with the back of my hand. I didn’t understand it! I’d followed the laws, I’d been good! Why couldn’t they see me? I stood up, moving before anyone could stop me, and I pushed past the onlookers as the chanting began to break the curse for the selected postulants.

I barely held it together as I stopped at the antechamber to change back into my clothes and headed towards the library to wait.

A sob ripped from my lungs as I opened the heavy doors, moved inside, and fell to my knees with heavy sobs escaping me. It wasn’t my fault. I hadn’t asked to be raped, I’d followed the rules. I’d fought off the darkness; I’d turned down Lucian, and for what? They couldn’t even see me! It was like I didn’t even exist to them.

I heard the music begin for the Harvest celebration, so I pulled myself up from the floor and forced my feet to move to the giant horsehair sofa, where I curled into a ball. This wasn’t happening. I’d be the oldest un-Awakened witch in history. I didn’t have a choice in the matter anymore. There would be no harvest, no learning how and what to do to help the coven with Kendra, because she’d be sequestered in the abbey, and I wouldn’t be allowed to participate in their lessons.

It wasn’t fair, none of it. Cassidy had been chosen, for fuck’s sake, and I hadn’t missed Helen’s smug look as I’d pushed through the crowd to escape the looks of the people who slowly figured out I’d just been skipped for the Awakening and everything it entailed. I was fucked.

I wasn’t waiting until the next one, screw that. I didn’t need magic to help the coven. I had botany, which meant I had to get the store back because I had no backup plan for life. I could grow plants like nobody’s business, and I was damn good at creating tonics and other concoctions. Mom would help me, and I could live at the cottage. I could make money, enough to live off of. I closed my eyes, ignoring the chants and laughter that filtered up from the ceremonial rooms.

I was going to be fine. I would make it through this. Somehow, I had to.

I wasn’t a quitter.

Chapter Thirty-One

I numbly moved through the abbey without seeing or hearing as the events continued without me. I moved through the rooms, looking for signs of life. Apparently everyone but me was at the Harvest Ceremony.

The common room was empty when I entered it and grabbed my bag, not wanting to be anywhere close to here when the excited people returned—or Cassidy, with her sure to be smug face. I left the room, tossing my bag over my shoulder as the gut-wrenching emotions filtered through me. It was as if I was living a nightmare, and there was no waking up from it. I hadn’t seriously considered that I wouldn’t be selected to get my powers.

It sucked; I was the first one in the Fitzgerald line to be excluded on their first Awakening.  Considering my age, I should have been a shoe-in! I groaned as chanting began from outside the abbey, my heart twisting as I felt the excitement from Kendra as they began the portion of the Harvest that would pair off couples. I swallowed the pain and stopped in the middle of the room, considering my options.

The weird burning and tingling I had felt earlier during the ceremony was back. Fuck, the spell for the Harvest was ramping up again and racing through my body, lighting up bits and pieces of me that had no business being lit up right now. It just wasn’t an option. I moved without knowing where I was going until I stood in the parking lot of the abbey, and realized I didn’t have my car here; Lucian had dropped me off. As if tonight didn’t suck enough already? I was about to go back inside when I spotted Kendra’s car, and laughed.

Maybe there was hope that the entire night wasn’t ruined. I opened the door and pulled down the visor as I shoved my bag into the passenger seat. The keys fell into my palm with a satisfying jingle. She was predictable. I plugged my phone into her cassette tape adapter, found Theory of a Deadman and hit play on
Hate My Life
, then pulled out of the parking lot and onto the road.

I got home, and realized I’d already made up my mind without considering the consequences. I was going to Lucian’s club, and I was taking what I wanted, whether he agreed or not. He owed me that much after all of his dirty words and slow seduction.

I quickly showered and made sure to use the plumeria shampoo and body wash I’d made in Pacific City, and then stared at my reflection. My eyes were puffy from crying, and I looked worn out. I shook my head and moved into the room, opening the closet to find the little black dress I’d purchased three years ago, but never had the balls to wear.

It was sexy, short, and with a pair of thigh highs and heels, it would say exactly what I wanted and needed. It had a deep V-neck that exposed cleavage, and also made it impossible to wear a bra with the darn thing. I slipped on a pair of black heels that strapped at the ankle and gave me just enough height while allowing me to walk without breaking my neck in the process.

I applied a thin application of make-up and some cherry red lipstick to make my tired appearance look cheerful, and headed towards the door. I didn’t stop to think about it; thinking hurt right now, thinking was overrated.

I paused as I heard my phone go off, pulled it from the little clutch I held, and looked at Kendra’s name and picture as it flashed across the screen. My heart clenched, and while I was happy that she’d been chosen, I felt empty and cold at the knowledge that I hadn’t been. The elders had said it was a possibility that one of us would have more power, but this was stupid. The next Awakening wouldn’t be for five more years, which would make me the oldest witch to ever be selected, if I even was!

I set my phone on the coffee table, opened the front door, and locked it as I left and made my way to where I’d parked Joshua’s car. I slid into the driver’s seat and headed towards the club. My body was burning and buzzing, my mind on autopilot as I drove through town and made my way to the middle of nowhere, where his club waited for me, bright as a beacon in the darkness.

As I pulled in, I started to second-guess myself. If he wasn’t alone, what was my plan? He’d been there when I wasn’t selected, so was he waiting for me? Or had he already made plans with someone else? My eyes scanned the couples that were scattered between the cars in the parking lot and noted that Mister Man-bun wasn’t at his normal spot guarding the doors tonight.

I slipped from the car, ignoring the couples locked in compromising positions that didn’t seem to care about the public displays of heavy petting. I slipped behind a group of women who were all dressed up a little bit too fancy considering it was a sex club, but what the hell did I know? Maybe there was a dress code? I didn’t spot one posted when I worked here so I really hoped there wasn’t.

Once inside, they headed to the doors that led into the lower levels and I passed through a set of doors, which I knew from being here and cleaning the rooms below, led into the actual sex club. The women didn’t stop, even though I paused as I noted couples barely dressed, and some completely naked.

The next room was just plain fucking weird. Some men and a few women were walking around with their partners on leashes, and some had tails! Not real tails, but my mind wanted to know exactly how they stayed in place, until I figured it out. Then I wished I wasn’t so freakishly curious. As I passed a man, he held out his hand and showed me a leash. Oh hell no, I wasn’t an animal to be walked around…and oh my God, was she drinking from a dog’s dish…Exit! Exit! Exit! I left the group, unwilling to see anymore.

The next room was actually labeled ‘Sir’s Playground’ and that piqued my curiosity. On stage was a woman, tied up and being whipped. I looked around at the people who watched her, and noted that many of them were fully clothed, while skimpily dressed waitresses took or delivered orders. It was as if it was a show for entertainment, which I guess was exactly what it was.

I couldn’t look away as the whip cracked loudly and the woman on stage begged for another. Was she fucking insane? I cringed as he gave her what she wanted. A few more lashes and he moved behind her, entering her quickly as the crowd applauded.

Okay, maybe I was the insane one because I didn’t understand why they’d applaud her counting or begging for more. I left the room with a rash of questions that I never planned to ask a living soul.

In the next room were a threesome and a couple of…five…somes? It was hard to tell in the dimly lit room, and while I did stop because my brain tried to figure it out, I remained in the shadows, hidden as I watched them. Okay, so this was kind of hot, in a kinky-how-the-hell-are-they-fitting-the-puzzle-pieces-together kind of way.

Someone touched my breast and I jumped, my eyes flying to the woman who smiled at me. She moved closer and I went flush against the wall.

“She’s beautiful, Kyle, and un-collared,” the woman purred as her hand continued to fondle my breast. I looked down, watching as she stroked me and then looked up at the couple. Kyle was tall, and built like a guy who forgot there was life outside the gym.

“Mmm, look at those lips, they beg to be filled,” he agreed.

I blinked. “I’m flattered, but I came here for one man and one man alone.”

“And who’s the lucky man?” the woman asked as she continued petting me, as if I was a strange cat she’d picked up.

“Lucian,” I said, and her hand dropped and they turned abruptly and left me standing there, alone. Weird.

This whole place was weird, but that reaction to his name? It must be what it’s like to be standing in a meth lab and announcing you’re D.E.A. I left the room, heading down the long hallway to the set of rooms that I’d cleaned, knowing that the one he’d brought me to climax in was his. There was only one boss in this place, and it was Lucian.

I rounded a corner and watched as a woman entered the room, leaving the door open just wide enough that I could see inside. I hesitated at the door, wondering what I would do if he rejected me tonight. I’d been through an emotional rollercoaster since getting home, but he’d been a constant distraction.  Another rejection tonight wasn’t a possibility. He owed me a lesson, and I planned on having him teach it to me tonight.

Squaring my shoulders and pulling my courage around me, I pushed open the door, and walked in behind the woman who had just gone in.

“Get out,” I growled, looking her right in the eyes, my face hard and dead serious.

“Excuse me?” she asked, as I took in her topless outfit.

“I said get out; he’s mine tonight,” I repeated moving towards her, hoping to the Gods I looked threatening.

“Lena,” Lucian’s voice said my name with something cold in his tone.

“Don’t you fucking ‘Lena’ me,” I growled and leveled him with a threatening look. “You promised to teach me that sex wasn’t just
fine
, and it’s time to pay up.”

His eyes heated and his lips twitched. “Is that so?”

“It is, so she needs to get lost because I’m just not into sharing you tonight,” I replied.

“This is Leslie, a serving girl,” he said, and I narrowed my eyes.

“I bet she is, and just what exactly does she serve?” I retorted.

“I serve drinks, my lady,” she whispered meekly and I turned to look at her. Yep, she was holding a tray and I groaned. I guess the uniforms here could be skimpier than the one I had been given.

“Of course you do,” I grumbled. I seriously should have just stayed in a ball and cried myself to sleep on that sofa instead of coming here.

“Would you like a shot, or something?” she asked and the sound of Lucian’s laughter brought tears to my eyes.

“Can I have a do-over?” I asked, and she looked at me.

“Go, Leslie,” Lucian said as he held my gaze. “Lena,” he whispered as he stood, but I moved away from him.

“This was a stupid idea,” I whispered, and shook my head as he moved closer. “I should go.”

“You should stay,” he eyed me speculatively. “Not to poke at what is obviously a sensitive subject for you, however, I am curious. Did you find out why you weren’t selected?” I shook my head miserably.

“They don’t tell you why,” I replied as I wiped away the tears. “In the end it really doesn’t matter anyway. Once the Awakening has begun, the situation isn’t in our hands. It’s in the ancestors’.”

“And you came to me,” he replied as his eyes took in the short skirt and fuck-me heels, and heat filled them as they moved back up to mine. “I’m flattered.”

“Make me forget how miserable tonight has been,” I whispered as I moved closer to him, slowly reaching for his shirt as I tipped my head back to watch his face for direction as I began to unbutton it.

“If I do, there’s no changing what will happen,” he replied in a husky voice.

“What do you mean, what will happen?” I kissed his stomach as I found his flesh. I heard his sharp intake of breath as my tongue darted out to trace his well-defined abs.

“There would be no going back.” his words were measured, carefully. “You’d be mine,” he growled as he captured my hands and picked me up, forcing my legs to wrap around him. “No other man would touch you,
ever
. There would be no comparison to see if anyone can teach you more.”

“Fine,” I whispered as I kissed him hungrily.