Play Dirty (3 page)

“This is why they haven’t called you back.” He took a sip of his drink, proud he didn’t refute her unwantedness. Fuck, did he want her, but he wasn’t going to say it. “They could smell the cat lady on you.”

“Probably.” She laughed, for real this time, and it was music to his ears. She turned to him and her whole demeanor shifted into something more serious.

“Listen, thanks for chasing that guy off. I never know what to do in those situations. They always make me so uncomfortable because no one ever seems to understand the word no. It can be a little … overwhelming.”

“A gentleman always respects when a lady doesn’t want anything to do with him.” Matthew gestured to her with his glass. “If you’re playing hard to get, that’s one thing; but when you aren’t interested? He needs to pack up his toys and go home. It’s completely disrespectful and there’s always more than one pretty girl in the bar.”

Lynn nodded and returned to her phone. Matthew ignored his, despite the growing itch in his palm to swipe his screen just one more time. A call would light the whole damn thing up and it was black as night. Unless it was dead.

“I don’t know.” Lynn pulled him back out of his head and away from his phone.

“I don’t know that I can blame the guy. You are definitely the prettiest in the bar tonight. I bet you are every night.” Oh my God, what was he even saying? Why was he saying this? Now he was the creepy older guy.

Matthew wanted to punch his own dick in the dick.

“I wish.” The bright smile returned. She was pink around the cheeks. “But thank you. I’ll take all the compliments I can get after this heartache.”

“It’s certainly a business of heartache. There are too damn many of us and too few roles. Sometimes, it’s easier to think about quitting than to think about another rejection. Don’t ever give up, though. Those who quit, never do.”

Lynn frowned slightly. “I guess. It can be really disheartening sometimes. It looks a lot less intimidating before you get in there. You know, you can think you’re awesome one minute and then be crushed the next. But, if the guy in the lip ring gets a callback and I don’t, I might just quit acting for life.”

“The man-bun guy?” Matthew shook his head. “There’s no way he can be what they’re looking for. Vance Gray doesn’t have a freaking man bun.”

Another smile. “No, no, definitely not. And Fiona wasn’t some wilting flower like half of them were playing. She was in love with an addict. That takes guts.”

“To guts.” Matthew clinked her glass. “Our scene was arguably the best there. Our talent probably blew them all out of their seats. Blew their brains, which is probably why they are taking so long to call. They’ve gotta find them first.”

“Or it sucked so badly they want to run us out of town.”

Matthew wanted to reach out and give her a hug. Her journey was just starting here in theater, and she was in for a lot of disappointment. It could be hard as hell to stomach, and everyone had to go through it, but he hated to see her look so glum. When she smiled, the whole world lit up. Not that he noticed.

Every.

Fucking.

Time.

He cleared his throat and put on the air of an old timey vaudeville performer. “Well. One thing is for certain: I didn’t tank our odds. My Vance Gray was fucking amazing.”

“Are you saying I’m the reason we didn’t get called back?” Lynn looked shocked, annoyed, and more gorgeous than before. The pink cheeks flushed a dangerous shade of red. “Rude.”

“I’ve been acting since I was a kid.” Matthew took another sip. One or two more drinks and he’d be drunk. It was both fun and dangerous. He was close to no longer caring about the audition and instead continued on the banter with this pretty young thing.

“I’m talking community theater every summer, going to state in high school, acting conservatory in college. I have my MFA in acting, for fuck’s sake. I’m the gold standard on Broadway.”

“Are you seriously giving me your resume right now?” Lynn laughed at him. Dimples everywhere. “You didn’t make it! They didn’t want you or your fancy MFA.”

Matthew couldn’t stop staring at her lips, remembering how they had claimed him during their audition and the sweet way she tasted. His drink made his head feel fuzzy and he decided he really didn’t particularly care anymore if he got called back or not, just so long as Lynn was there with him.

If someone tried to call either phone, he’d probably throw the damn thing out.

The way she worked her tongue during their kiss was enough to make him consider proposing, or at least propositioning, and the memory was almost as potent.

“Can I buy you another drink?” He said instead. A subject change was needed before he embarrassed himself again. She was too young for him and the last thing he needed, on top of this terrible day, was to be considered a creeper. The bar was starting to fill up, too, and getting a drink was going to take a while.

“Oh, just a diet soda for me. Thanks.” She shifted her gaze from him to the clock on the wall. “You know, having drinks and then taking the ferry home never ends well. I get seasick and all that.”

“Gotcha.” Matthew clicked his tongue like he was cocking a gun, for some terrible reason that made him want to bury his head under the bar, and disappear into the crowd. God, he needed to get his shit together
. Roles before hoes. Roles before hoes.

Lynn didn’t look at all like a hoe. Nadia had always been kind of slutty, and shame on him for never noticing it, but Lynn looked like pure sunshine. Pure sunshine that liked to get a little dirty under the sheets, perhaps.

He really should punch himself in the dick. It was screwing up his entire evening. A pair of tits and a pretty face shouldn’t derail his audition and career aspirations, even if his current state made him want to hand everything over willingly, so long as she sat on his face.

Goddammit, Matthew
.

By the time he got their drinks and pushed his way back to the table, the bar was full to the brim and his dick had thankfully decided to stop giving away his every thought. He set down her drink and leaned in to talk to her over the noise. “So where’s home?”

“Staten Island.”

Matthew let out a low whistle. “Fancy. When does your ferry leave, provided we’ve been forgotten by the infamous Director Lewis?”

She checked her phone, and disappointment colored her cheeks. Still no calls for either of them. “A few hours.”

“What did you say?” Matthew leaned in further, like he was trying to hear her over the noise. In his semi-intoxicated state, it was mostly to get close to her. The bar was just a nice cover.

“I said a few hours.” Lynn looked around. “Is there somewhere else we can go? It’s so loud in here and I’m afraid I’ll miss the call.”

She wanted to go somewhere with him, somewhere
quiet
. Maybe her kiss was genuine interest, and not awesome acting. Matthew cleared his throat and forced his body to cool down. She nailed the role, though, so maybe it was just acting and she was looking for nothing more than a quiet place to hear her phone.

Or maybe …

One look at her big eyes told him it was worth the shot. He lived around the corner, but nothing really screamed ‘creeper’ like inviting this girl to his apartment. If they were both drunk in a bar, that was one thing, but they had made out under stage lights while sober. Better to slow-play it.

“Well.” Matthew ran another hand through his hair. He liked the way she watched him when he did it. “There’s actually a really nice garden on the roof of this building. I took headshots up there once. Gorgeous views of the city but high up enough to be quiet.”

Roles before hoes
. Right, well he didn’t appear to have the role just yet, so this was only an innocent get-together, just two colleagues waiting for the big call. He wasn’t offering to take her back to his place. He wasn’t taking her out on a date. They needed a quiet place to watch their phones.

Nothing creepy about being responsible and watching for a callback, even if it likely wasn’t going to come this late in the evening. He’d had late calls before, though. So going up to the roof shouldn’t get his blood flowing. It wasn’t creepy or even sexy.

But it could be.

“Sounds perfect. Gardens soothe my nerves. You know, all the greenery and stuff. So, let’s go?”

God, she was young. Or was she nervous too?

Lynn reached for his hand. Sparks jumped between them as soon as their fingers touched, like something out of the movies.

They both paused to stare at each other. Matthew felt like he’d been shocked. Not only did they have electricity, but
she
had reached for
him
, like she wanted to touch him.

Suddenly, the kiss on stage didn’t seem so planned.

He could hope. The bourbon told him hoping for more moments like that, the ones that hooked him like a salmon tired of fighting upstream, were worth it. This young flower was within reach and it stirred a hardness within his pants. He laughed awkwardly.

“Damn static electricity.”

“Yeah, static electricity.” Lynn matched his sheepish look and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. He wanted to touch it himself.

Her blue eyes were the perfect shade of beautiful, and the way she turned pink when embarrassed had him wanting to kiss her all over again. They both stared too long and then laughed uncomfortably. Like they were in junior high or something ridiculous. But he loved it, he loved the way she filled him with this new spirit. He’d smoke it if he could. Drown in it.

“So, um, how do we get up there?” Lynn broke their silence.

He forced himself to stop staring and secured his hand around hers. “This way.”

PART ONE

If he was honest, this was Matthew’s favorite place in all of New York City. Sure, there were terraces and rooftop gardens everywhere, but this one had the best views of the Theater District, full of lights and sound and the energy of the theater spilling out over the streets and filling up all the dark spaces. A person could get lost there, amble past the brilliant flashbulbs and the show posters, and soak up the vibrant life all evening. They wouldn’t even have to go inside—they could just stand in the middle of the road with all the taxis and theater patrons and feel at home.

Theater was soul balm and it shaped his life in unimaginable ways. Without it, he’d still be the chubby kid in the back of the bus, cracking awkward ‘your mom’ one-liners and pretending fat jokes never fazed him. He wouldn’t be surrounded by the most amazing theater district in the entire world, five bourbons in, inches away from a gorgeous girl with a spirit of heaven and fire.

She clung to the railing and peered down, open-mouthed and thrilled. Her mouth was perfectly round and pouty, and his dick kept leaping in his pants at even a mere glance at it. He sat down on a bench behind her so he couldn’t embarrass himself too badly.

Skinny jeans were always a bad idea, especially for someone as well-endowed as he was, but they were part of his standard audition uniform. Sometimes, being big-dicked was just enough to give him a leg up over the competition, so to speak.

Lynn gazing across his beloved city reminded him of Juliet staring out her window, her long hair flowing in the breeze. It made him smile—his Juliet, perfect and angelic, framed in light and flushed with innocence.

Did Romeo’s Juliet kiss like Lynn?

Were her tits as immaculate, the girlish curve of her hips as welcoming?

The real Juliet was thirteen. Lynn was older than that at least, but still held the effervescent quality of youth. Was he a pervert for being so attracted to her? He wasn’t quite thirty yet, so he wasn’t that much older than her.

And she did kiss him first.

No, he couldn’t justify this. Juliet was still too young for him. He set his glass down on the bench and walked away from it. He could forever live in the memory of their smokin’ hot kiss, fantasize about her sweet mouth around his cock while in the shower or in bed, or watching television on his couch, and let that be that.

Their chemistry was incredible, truly. But the night air reminded him of his ticking clock, the impending doom of the end of summer and the rest of his savings. He needed his wits about him when the callback finally came in, and letting his cock move the focus to this beautiful, unattainable girl was making that impossible.

“Sometimes, I’m disappointed you can’t really see the stars out here.” Matthew spread his arms across a stretch of railing and leaned against it. “Back home, we could see every constellation in the sky and count shooting stars for wishes. All the big city lights hide them.”

“The city lights are just as incredible.” Lynn looked up into the black-grey sky, where only the moon and a few lone stars floated above. “And you can reach them here. That’s the thing about stars, you can never touch them.”

“Sure you can. You just have to know where to look.”

Lynn looked at him with a skeptical smirk. “Is that right? Where, Mr. Smarty Pants?”

Matthew grinned back and held out his hand. “Let me show you.”

She hesitated for just a moment, but finally took his hand. He led her through a pair of ivy-covered lattices and rows of bushes dotted with bright flowers, where Lynn named all of them, including their genus, and discussed their origins. He loved this brainy side to her. She was full of amazing depth and sophistication, all of which added to the mindfuck.

“This is the best part of the whole garden.”

Lynn gasped. Elephant ears and other exotics he couldn’t name surrounded a bubbling fountain. Out of the middle rose a ballerina on pointe, arms reaching outward. Matthew always pictured her reaching for a lover, dancing just out of sight. He wished they’d put her other half in another fountain nearby but never found one.

“She’s beautiful,” Lynn breathed. “Absolutely amazing.”

“I always thought she was a depressive beauty.” He touched her outstretched hands gently. “Like she was missing someone, looking for them, but no one was there.”

“I don’t see that at all.”

Matthew looked over at his brilliant Juliet. She crossed her arms around her thin frame and cocked her head to the side, studious.