Authors: Sarah Price
“VIPs: very important people. Sometimes, for political reasons, I have to meet with certain people such as mayors, congressmen, businessmen, promoters. Other times, people pay a lot of money to spend a few minutes with me.”
This time, she laughed. “People pay money to meet you?” It sounded ridiculous when she said it or, rather, the way she said it.
He smiled at her innocence. “
Sí
, just to meet me. To shake my hand and have a photo taken with me.” He paused, wondering how far to push the subject. Without giving it too much thought, he plunged ahead. “There are even women who cajole their way backstage to meet me.”
The tone of his voice seemed to sober Amanda, and she stopped laughing. Clearly, she understood something was amiss with that last statement. “Women? Why?”
He cleared his throat. “Most of the time, Amanda, they want to spend the night with me.”
The fact that he said it so casually must have startled her. She blinked for a few seconds as if trying to understand what he’d said. When she finally made sense of his words, the color drained from her face and her back stiffened. He had thought that the truth would get her attention. There were extreme differences between their lifestyles, and he needed to ensure that she understood that. No, he told himself. We both needed to understand that.
“That’s disgusting,” she said, breaking the silence.
Again, he shrugged. “I suppose.”
His casual response stopped her, and she stared at him for a long moment. She was thinking and replaying what he had just told her. He knew what was coming and quickly tried to decide on his response.
“
And do you?
”
Bingo, he thought. He was as good as a mind reader.
“Sí,”
he admitted. “Sometimes.” Now she would know who he truly was, he thought. What his life was truly like. And she would no longer be so curious.
“Why?”
That one word took him by surprise.
Why
, she had asked. He wished that he knew the answer. He wanted to tell her that it was because he was lonely or because he was a man with needs. He wanted to tell her that he was attracted to those women. But that wasn’t the truth. What was the truth?
“Because I can,” he finally admitted.
She took a quick, short breath. For a moment, she looked away, avoiding his eyes, but he could tell that his words resonated in her head.
Because I can.
The meaning behind those three simple words left her visibly stunned, and he knew that she didn’t want to imagine him being the type of person who lived that type of life. But when she finally did, she would know the extent of their cultural differences.
She lifted her chin and moved her eyes back to meet his gaze. “Would you sleep with me, if I were one of those women backstage?”
This time, it was his turn to be stunned. His mouth dropped open for a moment. Had she really just asked him that question? His thoughts of being a mind reader and sensing the predictability of people were shattered. He hadn’t seen that question coming at all. “I . . .” he started but stopped. He wasn’t certain how to respond to that. After all, he hadn’t thought of her in that way. And he certainly hadn’t expected her to even think in those terms. Let alone mention them! Yet she was staring at him expectantly, waiting for his answer. “I’m not answering that.”
“Would you or wouldn’t you, Alejandro?” she asked flatly, demanding an answer.
He rubbed at his upper lip and glanced away from her. He tried to imagine her backstage, tried to imagine her dressed like those women with short skirts and high stilettos. He couldn’t envision her with long, flowing hair and makeup. It was just not something he could see. But she was still silent, her eyes on his face.
“No,” he finally said.
“No?” She seemed disappointed.
“No.”
“Why not?”
He rubbed his hand over his face.
“¡Ay, mi madre,
Princesa
!
What are you doing to me?”
She frowned and appeared determined to elicit an answer from him. “I want to know why not. That’
s a fair question.
”
“No,” he said sharply. “It’s really not a fair question.”
She remained silent, waiting for his response, her eyes narrow and piercing as she stared at him.
“Because I respect you!” he snapped.
He regretted the words the moment he said them. It sounded awful. He knew that. It was the truth. He knew that, too. And now it was out there, and he suddenly wished that Elias or Lizzie would emerge to interrupt their conversation. He had no idea where this was going and felt beyond awkward, sitting with this young Amish woman and discussing sex.
“I see,” she said softly, her lips pressed tightly together in disapproval. Folding her hands on her lap, she took a deep breath. “So you spend the night with women you don’t respect but won’t spend the night with women who you do respect!” Put that way, it sounded as bad as he felt. Lifting her chin and squaring her shoulders, she said, “I’m glad that I’m one of those women who you wouldn’t spend the night with. I’d hate to be treated so casually, like a discarded horseshoe! But I will tell you this, Alejandro Diaz. You should respect all women. Maybe then you wouldn’t be so lonely on the road and spending your nights with strange women who you don’
t love.
”
He shook his head.
“Ay,
Princesa
,”
he mumbled.
“Maybe you could learn
that
from this . . .
adventure, Alejandro,
” she said sharply.
“I think this conversation is finished,” he said, standing up quickly, his knees creaking from having knelt for so long. He was sore from all of the work that he had done this morning. He didn’t know why he was suddenly so irritated, and even worse, he wasn’t certain if he was annoyed with her or with himself. Maybe, he wondered, she was right and that was what upset him. He was lonely, and he was tired of false friends and faceless lovers. He glanced at the fields one last time. “Do you need help with your laundry?”
He could tell that she was still upset about their conversation by the way she looked at him. He couldn’t read her expression. Was she angry or disappointed? Either way, it was good for her to recognize how different they were. Him, too. Despite the fact that he was too aware of her natural beauty and intelligent wit, the truth was that he was leaving in a few days and his life on the road was the polar opposite to hers on an Amish farm. She needed to be reminded of that.
“Nee,”
she said and looked away.
“Amanda,” he said quietly, waiting until she dragged her eyes back to stare at him. Her dark eyes seemed to bore into his soul, and he knew. She wasn’t angry or disappointed. Instead, she was hurt. “You wouldn’t like my world.”
“Mayhaps not,” she admitted. “Viper’s world sounds most horrible, a world without love and respect. And it doesn’t sound like the world for Alejandro, not the Alejandro that I know. But it doesn’t seem like I need to worry about experiencing that world. It’s not something that will happen, is it?” She bent her head down as she focused on folding the clothing as well as ignoring him.
There was nothing more he could say to her. She needed time to reflect on what he had shared with her and to realize that he was right. He sighed and turned around to walk away, realizing that he wasn’t all too sure if he liked his own world, his planet, especially after he had seen it through her eyes.
Chapter Nine
Amanda leaned on the crutches as she stood at the edge of the garden. It needed weeding, that was for sure and certain. The sun was just over the treetops, the sky changing into a deep, rich blue that was almost matching the color of her dress. Carefully, she used the crutches for support, holding them halfway as she sat down on the ground, the cast sticking out from under her dress. She didn’t care if anyone got angry with her. She was tired of sitting around the house. She wanted to help around the farm and, if nothing else, an hour of weeding would make her feel better.
The garden was coming along nicely. It seemed as if she had only planted it the other week, but she knew it was actually almost six weeks ago when she and Daed had plowed through the ground, fertilized it with some composted manure, and planted the rows of tomatoes, beans, beets, corn, and peppers. At the far end of the garden, she had even planted some watermelons and pumpkins. Her
daed
must have staked the tomatoes and beans while she was away in Ohio, for which she was grateful. Already, there were small green tomatoes just hinting at the possibility of turning red. Within a few weeks, they would have juicy red beefsteak tomatoes for dinner, that was for sure and certain. And soon after that, they would be canning tomato sauce for the winter months.
But, for today, it was the weeds that needed tending.
When she had been younger, she had asked her
mamm
why God created weeds. It had seemed like it was already an awful lot of work to maintain a garden that was free from pesky weeds trying to strangle the good plants that would provide the family with vegetables to eat. Her
mamm
had smiled at her and explained, “It’s God’s way of making certain we appreciate what we have. The harder we have to work for something, the better it often is. This is the same with us people, Dochder. We have to weed our hearts and minds from ugly and ungodly thoughts in order to be welcomed in his garden, ain’t so?”
It had been a good lesson to learn, Amanda realized, especially at such a young age. Life on a farm was fraught with hard work that reaped greater rewards. She had learned that early in life and had come to appreciate her
mamm
’s wisdom. It was the things in life that required hard work that meant the most to her. Ever since then, Amanda loved working in the garden. The feel of the dirt on her fingers, the smell of fresh growing vegetables, the sound of the quietness surrounding her . . . all of it made her happy.
Today, however, she was weeding more than the garden. It was the weeds in her mind that needed removing. She needed to be outside, close to nature and close to God. She knew that she was in great danger and the more she fought it, the closer it came.
She couldn’t help herself. It was her fondness for Alejandro that was growing in her head and in her heart. A weed, she told herself, although her heart told her otherwise. She had never spent so much time with a young man. And from what she knew of the Amish men and the courting ritual, she might not know her own husband half as well as she already knew Alejandro.
With an Amish courting couple, it would be a buggy ride here, a walk there, maybe a dinner with the parents later in the courtship. No hugs, no hand-holding. Just companionship. Suddenly, that little bit of knowledge about the other person would lead to a marriage, a marriage that would span a lifetime filled with years to get to know each other.
No, Amanda couldn’t deny her attraction to Alejandro. He was movie-star handsome, and his accent was charming. He had a sense of humor and was more than caring. Yet, she also sensed a darker side to him, the Viper side that was everything Alejandro was not. It was almost as though he was battling himself, suppressing the one side while fighting the other. She could tell that it didn’t make him happy. How could it? Such inner conflict was certainly what had led him to stay at the farm for the week.
And, of course, he was an Englischer. Despite her attraction to him, she was smart enough to know that nothing could ever come of it. He was the epitome of worldliness, while she was the image of being plain. Those two worlds could never coexist.
As she pulled some of the weeds, her heart felt heavy. Even though he had confided in her about the ugliness in his world, she couldn’t fight the attraction, the desire to help him be happy. He deserved it, she told herself. Under the Viper exterior, he was still Alejandro. Gentle, sweet, caring Alejandro.
By the time that she had cleared the outer row of the garden of its weeds, the sun was almost at its peak in the sky. It was warmer out, and she was sweating under the sun’s heat. Looking back over what she had weeded, she felt disappointed. It had taken her a long time to clear that row, for she could only reach into the garden about eighteen inches. But there was still a lot more that needed to be cleared.
“There you are, Princesa,” Alejandro called out as he walked around the side of the barn. He laughed as he approached her. “What on earth are you doing?”
At the sound of his voice, she looked up. “
Weeding,
” she said simply. For a moment, she frowned. She could never understand why he always wore his sunglasses. They hid his eyes, and then she couldn’t tell what he was truly thinking. Since their discussion the previous day, she had felt awkward around him, pleased that he respected her but confused about his other confession. “Why are you laughing?”
Casually, he squatted down beside her and knocked gently at her cast. When he looked at her, the sun reflected off the dark lenses, making his face seem ever more jovial and bright. Clearly, he had moved on from that discussion and was feeling at ease with her. That confused her, too. “You look silly with your leg jutting out so,” he teased.
“I look silly?” she asked, color flooding to her cheeks. For a quick second, she saw herself reflected in his lenses. She did look silly with her blue dress and misshaped leg. Her hair was messy, stray wisps stuck against her sweaty skin on the back of her neck. She wasn’t wearing her prayer
kapp
, just a thin scarf to cover her head. She was so common, so plain. It was no wonder that he was laughing at her. And now, she was blushing. She could feel the heat on her skin and tried to stand up. But it was almost impossible without the crutches, and they were tossed on the ground at the other end of the garden.
Alejandro jumped to his feet as he tried to steady her. As his hands touched her arms, she pulled backward and before she knew it, she toppled over and he fell to the ground beside her. Quickly, she sat up and pulled at the bottom of her dress to make certain her legs weren’t too exposed as Alejandro got to his knees. He started laughing again, the sound ringing in the wind.
Running his fingers through his hair, he shook his head. “Oh, Princesa,” he murmured, a smile still on his face. He reached out to touch her arm again, and this time she didn’t struggle. Instead, she let him help her to stand. Catching her balance, she fell against him, and instinctively he wrapped his arm around her waist to make certain she didn’t fall again. “You are something else.” He paused.
“Dulce,”
he whispered into her ear.
“
I don
’t know what that means, but I do know that you can let me go now,” she said flatly, convincing herself that she meant it. Deep down, she really didn’t. She liked feeling the pressure of his arm around her waist. She liked smelling his woody cologne. She liked simply being near him. But to say such things . . .
nee
. . . to even think such things was most un-Amish and definitely
verboden
, forbidden by the Ordnung.
She wasn’t certain if he read her mind or not, but he hesitated, just long enough to whisper in a teasing tone, “I can,
sí
?” His breath was warm on her neck, and she felt her skin jump, like tiny shock waves.
“Ja!”
she said forcefully, trying to avoid looking at him.
Chuckling to himself, he released her from his grasp. But the movement was too sudden, and she wobbled backward.
“Nee,”
he murmured. “I think not.” Pulling her back into his arms, he stared down into her face and hesitated for a moment. His eyes seemed to search hers, but it was hard to tell since his were hidden behind sunglasses. Then, smiling once again, he said, “I think, instead, you should lean on me, and we will get those crutches together.”
Giving in, she let him continue holding her waist as she hopped beside him. She knew that her cheeks were still brilliant red and that she was beyond embarrassed. Yet, at the same time, she felt more alive than she ever had before. He had laughed at her, whispered in her ear, and held her in a manner that made warmth spread throughout her veins. She had never experienced anything or anyone like Alejandro Diaz before in her life.
He was a gentleman, holding her gently, and when they stood before the crutches, he leaned down to get them for her. For a moment, he focused on helping her gain her balance, his expression serious until he was satisfied that she wasn’t going to fall again.
“I’
m fine,
” she said softly. Then, before she forgot her manners, she quickly added,
“Danke,
Alejandro
.”
“Your
mamm
sent me to find you,” he explained, obviously aware of her discomfort. “It’s time for dinner, she asked me to tell you.”
Trying to act calm and collected, she nodded her head in acknowledgment before using her crutches to walk back toward the house. She could still hear him chuckling to himself as he walked behind her. She wished that she could glance over her shoulder at him, to see the expression on his face, and to let him know that she didn’t find this funny. But, instead, she felt that warmth inside her veins rise again as she remembered him holding her, her chest pressed just enough against his to feel his heart beating beneath the soft fabric of his fancy Englische shirt.
“
My word,
” Lizzie said when Amanda came in through the door. “What happened to you?” She hurried over to Amanda and began brushing the grass off her dress. “Amanda!”
“I fell,” Amanda offered, her explanation curt and simple. She set her crutches against the table as she sat down on the bench. When she noticed her mother staring at her, she sighed and provided more details. “I was weeding the garden, and Alejandro helped me get up.”
“Are you all right, then?”
Lizzie fussed.
“Ja, ja,”
Amanda said, forcing a smile that she didn’t feel like sharing. She was still thinking about his arms around her. She had felt so warm and safe in his hold, even if only for those brief few seconds. It made her long for more time alone with him. “I just have to learn my limits, I reckon.”
Alejandro and Elias walked into the kitchen, talking between themselves about plans for the afternoon. Amanda felt her heart jump as she saw the glow in her father’s eyes. Clearly, he was enjoying having some male companionship around the farm. And from the looks of it, she realized, Alejandro was feeling just as relaxed around her
daed
.
“Might take a ride over to the Edwardses’ farm later,” Elias said after they had prayed. He picked up his fork and started to eat.
“You mean that Jake Edwards?” Lizzie said as she passed around the bowls of steaming potatoes and vegetables. She frowned. “
Whatever for?
”
“Thought Alejandro might like seeing some of his horses,” Elias said, winking at Amanda. “I’d offer to take you along but . . .”
“But what?” she said, perking up.
“Not so sure with your leg and all,” her
daed
said.
She slumped on the bench and scowled as she picked at her food.
Lizzie frowned. “That’s an awful long ride just to see some horses.”
Elias looked at Alejandro, ignoring Lizzie’
s comment.
“This Edwards fellow moved here a few years back. Inherited his grandfather’s farm. Breeds the most gorgeous Standardbred horses you’ve ever seen.”
“
We don
’t need any horses,” Amanda said wryly.
“
He was an Englischer,
” Elias added, ignoring Amanda’s comment. “Married a young Amish woman, and they both joined the church later.”
Alejandro raised an eyebrow. “Really? People do that?”
Lizzie looked up and, for the briefest moment, stared at him. Amanda noticed the look on her mother’s face and saw her expression change. She was glad that no one else was looking at her mother for certainly they would have read her mind as easily as she had. “Not very often,” Lizzie finally said, a serious tone in her voice. Her eyes flickered toward Amanda, and she held her daughter’s gaze.
“Can’t imagine just anyone could do that,” Alejandro said, unaware of the unspoken conversation between Amanda and Lizzie. “It would be hard to leave the convenience of the world,
sí
? As peaceful as it is here, I can’t envision many people being capable of doing it.”
Lizzie lowered her eyes and picked at her food. She didn’t seem to follow the conversation anymore. Amanda was too aware of her
mamm
’s silence, but after a few minutes, she shrugged it off. If her
mamm
was worried about Alejandro wanting to convert to being Amish, she was a long way off track. He was too much a product of the Englische world to give it up, that was for sure and certain.
Yet she envied him. Unlike most folks, he had the opportunity to straddle both worlds. Not many people could travel the world, entertaining millions of adoring fans, then disappear to the quaint peace and quiet of Lititz, Pennsylvania. She wondered what it would be like to experience
his
world, even if just for a few days. Her curiosity was piqued, and her mind wandered as the afternoon passed. She tried to imagine what life would be like in big cities, living in hotels and having people fawn all over her.