Pieces of Broken Time (21 page)

“Back again? You look like shit,” Sam said as Blake stepped through the doors again.

If I’d had any other place to go . . .

Being here made him feel too raw and too transparent because Sam always saw right through him.

“Shut it. I’m not in the mood.” Blake flopped down in the chair.

Sam chuckled. “When are you ever?”

It was the truth. When had the clouds ever lifted? He was fast becoming his own worst enemy. He refused to give in to his feelings because he was scared of sharing the secret he’d kept for so long. That’s why he’d doomed Katrina. She’d always known that his heart had belonged to someone else.

Sam pointed to the door on the far left. “Take the next room. It’s vacant.”

Blake shrugged.

At least Sam wasn’t grilling him. He needed a place to hide and work through this. He’d made an ass of himself once more and insulted Jennifer in the process.

Not bothering to turn the lights on, he collapsed in the chair and closed his eyes.

November 20, 2000

Blake had been on a training mission with his unit in Africa, along with another group of Special Forces, when luck smiled on them in the form of clearance to return home until their next deployment. Great news, considering it meant they got the tail end of summer in the States, and the chance of Blake catching some good waves was still possible.

His first call should have been to his parents, but Blake had needs not even his staunchest supporters could satisfy.

Instead, fresh off the fifteen-hour flight from Sierra Leone, Blake waited for Katrina to answer.

The mounting stress relating to his job had been eating at him, and Trent’s constant chatter about Jennifer was grating on his last nerve.

Sure, the woman was a perfect sight to behold, and one of those rare gems no one would want to part with, but Trent’s nonstop worshipping had driven Blake to madness. The only way he knew to combat it was to find release.

“Hey, you’re back?” Katrina sounded ecstatic.

Great start to my plans for the evening.

“Yeah. Are you free tonight?” he asked, not wasting time on pleasantries.

“Sure. My place or yours?”

“Your place at seven. I’ll bring dinner and a bottle of wine.”

As the sound of calming ocean waves accompanied them during their candlelit dinner, Blake felt a burst of energy and anticipated good things ahead. The braised lamb he’d ordered was cooked to perfection, and the cabernet complemented their meal and set the right mood.

Considering his motives, Blake liked to think that this showed he was still treating Katrina with respect.

“This is wonderful.” Katrina took a sip from her glass and closed her eyes in contentment.

“It sure is,” he answered, patting his belly. Nothing beat a great sit down dinner with an old friend.

“Another toast?” Katrina poised her glass in the air and waited for him to raise his. “Here’s to you, for coming back home to me in one piece.”

Blake cringed at the expressed sentiments, but put up a halfhearted smile. “Thanks.” He clinked his glass to hers and downed the contents in silence. An image of Jennifer flashed through his mind, and he fought not to choke as the last swallow went down the wrong pipe.

Katrina walked over to him and hesitated. “Can I?” She gestured to his lap. When he cleared his throat and patted his thigh, she sat and wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. “I’ve missed you,” she whispered.

Blake couldn’t think of an answer over the primal hunger clouding his head.

The mood was perfect and the ambience couldn’t have been any better with the beach only a few steps away. It was why he’d chosen her place over his. The sound of the ocean had always been his refuge with its calming effects.

“I have something for you.” He fished inside his pocket, retrieved a little purple bag, and handed it to her.

“You got me a gift?” Katrina’s blue eyes were wide, and Blake felt like an idiot.

Of course, the woman had expectations, and he was a big tease to dangle the possibility in her face.

She released his neck and sat down in the next chair. Excitement radiated from her as she loosened the cord on the velvet pouch, sneaking little glances in his direction.

“It’s a necklace,” he said, stopping any thoughts she might be entertaining of an engagement ring. He saw her disappointment quickly replaced by a forced smile.

“This is beautiful.” She inspected the intricate details, running her fingers on the beads. “What is it made of?”

Blake leaned forward and took the jewelry from her.

Katrina lifted her hair to give him access.

“It is made of lappa beads made out of brass, recycled glass and clay. It’s what they call Salone style. I thought you might like it.” He clasped the lock.

Katrina turned and threw her arms around him, settling her mouth firmly on his.

“Thank you,” she murmured after their lips parted. She straddled his hips when he coaxed her to sit on his lap.

Their lips reunited for another long and passionate kiss. Moments later, their heated desire found its way to the bedroom.

The night passed as they continued exploring the depths of their physical hunger. Driven by lust and a demanding need to forget the face and name that haunted him, Blake made love with Katrina over and over until sunrise peeked over the horizon. In spite of the satisfaction his body had enjoyed, his heart was empty and his life was far from perfect.

Chapter 18

Blake woke up from his short nap feeling shittier than ever. Glancing around, he remembered swinging by the rehab center to hide. Sam had offered the room, and he must’ve dozed off.

Sam was finishing with another patient when Blake joined him in the common room.

Blake kept his distance until the teenager in a wheelchair was out of earshot. “Thanks for letting me crash here,” he said in a quiet voice.

“Anytime, my man.” Sam checked his watch and rubbed his belly. “Wanna grab a burger and a beer?”

Blake shook his head, remembering Jennifer alone in the house. “Not this time. I have some groveling to do.” He headed to the exit, and Sam’s chuckle followed him out the door.

He concocted a plan while making his way to his vehicle. His brusque behavior earlier called for damage control. He leaned on the door and dialed Jennifer’s number, hoping she wasn’t too upset to pick up.

The phone kept ringing. He was about to hang up when she answered.

“Hello?” Her voice sounded tentative.

Blake took a deep breath and hoped for the best. “I’ll pick you up in thirty minutes. Dress comfortably.” He made it sound like he wasn’t expecting her to decline. Sometimes he wondered if it was even possible to revert to the old Blake, the man who had embraced what life had to offer because he had enough love to give.

When he heard a soft click, he knew his work was cut out for him.

He’d said hurtful things out of fear and a need to hide what he felt, but he wasn’t going to let her snub deter him.

He eased the Jeep out of the almost deserted parking lot and turned left onto Avenue J. If begging for forgiveness was in order, a bouquet of flowers was a necessary tool to aid the effort. He turned into the flower shop’s parking lot with every intention of finding the perfect arrangement.

“What can I get for you?” the woman behind the counter asked.

Blake hesitated, feeling out of his element. “I need a flower arrangement.”

“Great. I can help you with that. Do you have anything in mind?”

When he shook his head, the lady led him to the cooler section and showed him several ready-made bouquets.

He studied each one but nothing caught his eye. “I want something much more special.”

“What is the occasion?”

“I’ve been an ass.” Blake rubbed his forehead, unable to believe that he just let a stranger in on his woes.

The woman laughed. “Okay . . . let’s see. White flowers connote forgiveness.”

“Uh-huh.” He gave her a blank stare.

“Do you trust me to come up with something beautiful for you?”

Trust?

Beautiful?

Yep, that’s Jennifer
.

“Yes,” he said.

While the lady started opening the refrigerated section and pulled flowers from buckets, he wandered around.

He felt a little silly, but it was too late now.

Women like flowers, right?

Or jewelry.

His teeth clenched as he recalled the mistake he’d made the last time he’d bought jewelry for a woman.

In less than twenty minutes, the florist called out and presented him with an array of elegant and fragrant flowers.

All Blake could do was grin.

Jennifer’s gonna love them.

“What are the flowers?”

“Roses, oriental lilies, and some alstroemeria.”

After he paid for the arrangement, he felt light on his feet as he banked on Jennifer’s forgiveness being given without a hitch.

The rest of the drive home was spent in self-reflection.

When he reached his place, Drew began barking when he spotted him walking up the path.

So much for surprising Jennifer.

“Hey, boy, where’s the beautiful lady?” he whispered, bending down to run his hand over Drew’s shiny coat.

“She’s right here.”

Jennifer was seated on the sofa, looking glorious, and dressed in a floral sundress that showed more skin than he needed to see.

His gaze was immediately drawn to her low-cut neckline that revealed her rounded cleavage.

Damn it, Connor. Don’t start.

Feeling the heat rising to his face, he looked up to catch Jennifer narrowing her eyes. It was another tongue-tied moment while Blake searched for something intelligible to say. Nothing came to him, and in an effort to avoid looking like an idiot, he took a step forward and offered the flowers to her.

Her face softened, and a little smile broke the ice. “Thank you.” She sniffed the flowers. “They’re lovely. What’s the occasion?”

“It is step one of my attempt to beg for forgiveness.” He hoped that his lighthearted tone would earn him another smile.

She smiled. “What is step two?”

He refrained from pumping his fist. “Dinner.”

“I’m all dressed and ready to go, but I have one condition.”

“Let’s hear it.” He crossed his arms over his chest and waited.

Jennifer sighed. “I don’t want you to ever be jealous on my behalf.” She tilted her head as if egging him to refute her.

“Agreed.”

“And—”

“You said one.”

She glared at him. “Do you want to go to dinner or not?”

He nodded and pressed his lips together.

“I won’t pretend that the things you said this morning didn’t hurt me.”

“I know and I feel bad for saying it. You see, when things get really tight, I say anything that comes to mind. I hope you can forgive me.”

“I want you to stop pushing me away.”

Unbelievable! Don’t ask for much, do ya?

He bobbed his head. “Five minutes?” he asked.

“Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.” She looked away, but not before he saw the twinkle in her eyes.

Muttering under his breath, he hurried to wash his face and change his clothes.

Whoa! Am I going on a real honest-to-goodness date?

He couldn’t help but smile at his reflection, loving the idea of a night out with Jennifer. He fixed his eye patch and patted his growing hair. The beanie seemed out of place with his black shirt. He tugged it off and checked his inner disgust meter.

His blond hair had grown relatively long, and the skin on his left cheek was turning pink.

Not too bad if the restaurant lights are dim
.

He pushed the strands behind his ears and picked up his keys from the bureau.

“Let me feed Drew and let him out before we go,” he said as he passed by the living room and whistled.

“I fed him earlier,” Jennifer answered from the kitchen.

“What are you doing up?” His voice turned harsh.

Jennifer turned from the sink and held up her hand in a warning gesture. “I’m using the crutches so there is no undue pressure on the foot. Besides, I wanted my flowers in a vase.”

“I don’t have a vase.”

“I know. I improvised.” She held up a glass pitcher filled with the blooms and laughed.

He grinned, unable to resist her charm. “Ready?” He preceded her down the hall and opened the front door for her in an attempt to be a perfect gentleman.

Lancaster offered few choices for fine dining so he’d decided to drive to the neighboring town of Palmdale. The town boasted restaurants that were a step above fast food places or hole-in-the-wall eateries.