Pastor Needs a Boo (50 page)

“What about it?” Luther asked her coldly. “You should be thanking God that you are not behind bars wearing an orange jumpsuit and trying to keep some woman named Big Mama Moo or Luckey Yee Yee from trying to make you give her a lap dance 'cause she just made you her Big House Honey.

“You can kiss that eight mil good-bye. Todd is going to hold what you did over your head so he can be free of you. Count your blessings and name them one by one. What just happened to you was a very close call in my book.”

Tatiana nodded and sniffed up her tears. It was going to be devastating trying to live off of her six-figure nurse's salary. She was going to have to move into a three-bedroom town home, and probably clean her own house. Just the thought made her cry to the point of sobbing.

“
SUCK IT UP
, Tatiana,” was all Luther said. He didn't even give her his handkerchief—just got a painful grip on her arm to get his message across.

Sonny Washington snatched the microphone out of Raphael's hand and did something he had not had a desire to do in years—pray. He said, “Father God, forgive us our trespasses against You and this meeting. You are welcome, Lord. Put order to this meeting and clear it out of the mess that just transpired, Amen.”

Theophilus and Eddie looked at each other, and then looked up at the ceiling to make sure it wasn't popping open and Jesus was cracking across the sky. Several other folk did the exact same thing. And a few texted some family members,
You betta hurry up and get saved.

Sonny stared out into the audience at Reverend Denzelle Flowers, standing next to a very pretty lady. It was clear he was in love with this woman. And it was clear he wanted this woman by his side. That was just enough to give him the courage to press forward with his agenda.

“Gospel United Church, we called this special session to vote in a new policy whereby a pastor cannot run for bishop if he is divorced and remarries while the ex-spouse is still alive. This policy would also include a clause that prohibited an elected bishop from staying in office if he or she were to divorce or were divorced and remarried while the spouse was alive.

“As you can see, we would not have witnessed that profane display of physical craftsmanship if this law were in place during Bishop Thomas Lyle Jefferson's tenure as an active bishop. He has several ex-spouses who are still alive, and his newest spouse has brought some controversy to the office of Episcopal Supervisor. I'd bet good money that Episcopal Supervisor Violetta Jefferson's family member wouldn't have been an embarrassment to the office of the Episcopacy if this new law were in place when Bishop Jefferson met his most recent wife.”

Violetta was pissed. Sonny and Marcel hadn't paid them enough for this level of humiliation. She glared at her husband. But Bishop Jefferson wasn't the least bit concerned about what Violetta thought and felt. He texted,
You should have thought about that when you insisted that your crazy uncle come with us to the States. Get it together and don't ever look at me like that again.

Violetta bowed her head down to hide her tears. Sometimes Thomas was so mean. She understood why he couldn't keep a wife. If it weren't for his money and secret supply of that WP21 stuff he got from Marcel and Sonny, she'd leave his butt. Thomas had all of that original WP21, and he didn't even know how to use it right. Pitiful.

“We don't need the office of bishop sullied like this again,” Sonny Washington was saying. “Join me, fellow bishops, and cast your votes. We need to bring decency and honor and moral standards back to the office of bishop, and to the role of the Episcopal Supervisor.”

Sonny knew he'd won this battle by the look on Theophilus's and Eddie's faces. They knew they would not be able to get Denzelle Flowers elected bishop if he remarried. And judging from the way Denzelle was gazing down at that woman, he was going to be hardpressed to avoid matrimony.

Sonny couldn't believe it. Finally, they had won. And the feeling was oh so sweet.

Denzelle watched his mentors digest this moment, and then walked up to the front. He wanted Sonny Washington to have a few seconds to savor his short-lived victory. It was going to be supersweet when he delivered this blow to the enemy camp.

“Bishops Washington, Jefferson, Simmons, and Tate. If I may, I'd like to speak to my brethren in the ministry about my position as a candidate for the office of bishop.”

Sonny was feeling good. He handed Denzelle the microphone, anxious to hear how he was going to step down.

Denzelle stared at Marsha, who was looking troubled, and winked. He said, “I am stepping down from my candidacy for the office of bishop because I am already married to my heart and new first lady, Mrs. Marsha Metcalf Flowers. As much as I thought I wanted to run for bishop, nothing compares to finding a woman worthy of the title Proverbs 31 Woman. I don't want anything so badly that I would subjugate my heart as a pastor to sorrow, loneliness, and misery. Plus, I really like being a pastor more than I'd ever enjoy serving as a bishop.

“But there is someone out there who really needs to serve as bishop alongside her father. Reverend Dr. Sharon Simmons-Harris would you, and your husband, the Honorable North Carolina Supreme Court Justice, come forth.”

Judge Harris grabbed his wife's hand and pulled her up front. He'd always believed she would make an excellent bishop and be able to handle being the denomination's first woman elected to an Episcopal seat in the Gospel United Church. They reached the stage, and he kissed Sharon and said, “Let them know who you are, Baby.”

Sharon took the microphone from Denzelle and said, “I accept the challenge.” She turned to her dad and said, “Daddy, it's time for you and Uncle Eddie to get with the program and get a woman on the Board of Bishops.”

Theophilus smiled at his baby. She was so much like him, with just enough of her mother in her to do this job, and to do it right. He walked over to Sharon, grabbed her hand, and said, “We've got work to do. I'm ready to retire, and I want a good bishop in office!”

Folk got up and started cheering “Bishop Sharon! Bishop Sharon! Bishop Sharon!”

Sonny, Marcel, Ray Caruthers, and Xavier Franklin all walked out. They had their work cut out for them. The women in the denomination had been begging for a female bishop for decades. And it would be hard to beat the daughter of the famous Theophilus Simmons.

“That's messed up,” was all Marcel Brown could say.

Tatiana stared at Xavier and Camille, and then back at Luther, who was scoping out a new woman. She didn't know how she and Xavier were going to work out being together if he ran for bishop. Camille was not going to stand aside this time. She liked being in the spotlight with the frontrunner for that coveted Episcopal seat, and was not sharing anything with another woman—especially if the other woman was Tatiana Townsend.

Tatiana looked over at Marsha Flowers, beaming and happy and the sole object of Denzelle's attention. If she weren't so mean and hateful, Tatiana would have thrown herself in front of a car. These next months were going to need all of her attention. She didn't have time to get smashed up by a moving car.

Denzelle came down and grabbed his wife. He was so happy and loved her so much. His heart was filled to the brim with joy. So this is what a pastor's heart was supposed to be like. Who knew he needed a boo this much?

 

Epilogue

Marsha was looking good on her very first Sunday as New Jerusalem's new first lady. Theresa Hopson Green, owner of Miss Thang's Holy Ghost Corner and Church Woman's Boutique, had hooked her up with the sharpest outfit in the Triangle. She was wearing a robin's egg blue, two-piece silk suit. The peplum top had a shawl collar, dainty puffed sleeves, and crimson, blue, and cream–colored crystal buttons down the front. The skirt was full and swirled whenever Marsha moved.

She had on the same crimson-colored, patent-leather pumps with four-inch heels and built-in platforms she wore on her “official” wedding day. As soon as Denzelle saw Marsha pull that particular shoebox out of the closet, he asked her to wear the shoes only, and only the shoes alone. And once again, that request almost made them late for church.

Marsha's jewelry was perfectly matched to the blue-and-crimson theme of her outfit. She had on a pair of gold-hoop earrings with garnet, blue topaz, and mother-of-pearl chips sprinkled all over them, a matching bracelet, and a gold chain with the same stones embedded in the links. Marsha Metcalf Flowers was looking good. The only thing that put a tiny cloud over what was otherwise a perfect morning was that she couldn't drive her brand-new Cadillac SUV—a gift from her new husband—to church.

This was a special morning, because they were installing Sharon Simmons-Harris as the new lead associate pastor. Sharon had a wealth of experience but not in the capacity of a pastor. She had spent most of her time as a biblical scholar and leading theologian. But she needed to be in the pastor's seat as much as possible to rule out any qualms about her ability to serve as a strong bishop in the Gospel United Church.

The church was packed with members and guests. They wanted to celebrate the kickoff of Sharon's campaign. They wanted folk superexcited about this ground-breaking campaign. The Gospel United Church would be one of the last of the traditional black denominations to elect a woman bishop. The AMEs had several, and the AME Zions needed to elect some more.

The women in the church were so pumped. Sharon, who was also a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority like Denzelle's wife, had gotten the Sorors, as well as the Sigmas, involved at the local and national levels. It hadn't been difficult to get Phi Beta Sigma involved with a campaign for a Zeta. Plus, her husband, a high-ranking Sigma, made sure his fraternity brothers were onboard in full force to help his wife win her Episcopal seat.

This morning, the guest section was full of who's who in the ranks of preachers—Bishop Emeritus Murcheson James; Reverend George Wilson from St. Louis, along with his wife, Sheba, and their children; Dr. Saphronia McComb James and her husband, who was one of the most prominent retired pastors in Atlanta; Apostle Grady Gray and his assistant pastor, Dotsy Hamilton, along with a host of members from their church; and Obadiah, Lena, and many of their members from Fayetteville Street Gospel United Church in Durham.

And sitting in the pulpit with Denzelle and Sharon were Bishops Theophilus Simmons and Eddie Tate, along with their wives, Episcopal Supervisors Essie Lane Simmons and Johnnie Tate. They thought it only fitting to have the women behind these two men's extraordinary ministries in the pulpit there to celebrate the candidacy of a woman for bishop—especially since that woman had learned from the best, her father and godfather.

Sharon's siblings, Linda and T.J., along with their spouses and kids, had also made it to Raleigh to celebrate their sister's run for bishop. Linda was a prominent first lady in Atlanta, and T.J. owned a string of parking lots all over the St. Louis downtown area.

Denzelle didn't want to preach this morning. Sharon didn't want to preach this morning. Obadiah didn't want to preach this morning. And Theophilus and Eddie didn't want to preach, either. They needed a really good preacher to deliver the sermon—one who truly understood the structure of their church and what they would be up against when this campaign was up and running at full force.

Everybody voted for Reverend Philip R. Cousin Jr., Senior Pastor at Bethel AME Church in San Francisco, to deliver the Word this morning. And to their credit, Bethel AME had come across the country in full force to support their pastor and the good folk at New Jerusalem.

There were also members, along with the Inspirational Singers Choir, from St. Joseph's AME Church in Durham. St. Joseph's was Reverend Cousin's former church. Reverend Cousin told them that he and the first lady, Angela, couldn't come to a church in North Carolina without the Inspirational Singers, because this was his travel choir when he served as the pastor at that church.

The Inspirational Singers of St. Joseph's AME Church took their places in the choir loft behind the pulpit. Their royal blue and gold–trimmed robes made a pretty striking contrast with the decor of New Jerusalem. The soloist walked up to the microphone, and the musicians opened with the first chords of the song, “Secret Place” by Kevin Davidson & The Voices out of Memphis, Tennessee.

The lead, a known jazz singer named Adia Ledbetter, started singing, and folk started dabbing their eyes with tissues. This song was so perfect for what they had been through, what they were facing, and what they were trusting God to do for them with this campaign to get Sharon Simmons-Harris elected bishop. Ms. Ledbetter's voice rang out, making folk think they were hearing a blend of Sarah Vaughn, Ledisi, and of course Adia's unique vocal style all wrapped up together.

The choir came in with their harmonious section, “Have a little talk with Jesus,/tell Him all about your troubles,/He will hear you cry,/He'll answer by and by.”

When they transitioned up to a new key, there wasn't a dry eye left in the church. Folk were standing up with their hands raised, crying and calling on the Name of the Lord. Folk were thanking Him and praising Him and petitioning Him all over the church.

Reverend Cousin was ready to preach but held off when the choir ended the song and started up again. He usually came down to the altar during prayer, or at the end of a service. But this morning he went down to the foot of the altar, because Todd Townsend had come down to the altar while the choir was singing. Denzelle and Obadiah hurried down to stand with Reverend Cousin.

Todd fell on his knees and said, “I want to thank You, Lord, for saving me. You saved my soul, and You saved my life. You are amazing, Lord. And I want to tell You Thank You in front of everybody at this church.”

Todd wiped his eyes, stood up, and pulled out three certified checks. He gave one to Denzelle. It was a tithe check from his first month's pay in the new job—$142,000.