Past Forward- A Serial Novel: Episode 11 (15 page)

“
Chad commented earlier that he can see how much you love your wife
.”

“
I do love my wife
,
Willow
.”
Solari paused by the orchestra leader and made a request before whirling her back onto the floor for the last few steps of the dance.
“
Will you keep dancing
,
Willow?
I want to talk
.”

“
I
’
ll dance the next
,
but I
’
m here with Chad
,
and
it would
be rude to leave him for any longer than that
.”

Solari nodded and clapped with the rest of the dancers as the song ended.
“
Thank you
.”

As the next dance began, Willow fought to find words that would keep the Solaris far from her door but without insulting them.
“
Mr. Solari
—
”

“
Please call me Steve at least
.”

“
Steve,
”
she began hating the sound of it on her tongue.
“
I
know
that my mother
may
have been terribly wrong about you
,
but
her experiences, her
impressions are written on my heart.
I can
’
t just erase them overnight
.”

“
Are you saying you
’
re willing to try
—”
Steve began eagerly.
Too eagerly.

“
I am saying that a year ago you had no idea that I existed.
You were content with your life in so much as you could be.
I, on the other hand, knew of your existence, as did my mother.
Neither of us chose to change that then.
Can you see why it is hard for me to adjust to your knowledge of it now?
I
’
ve spent twenty-three years of my life trying to hide my existence from a man I believed with all of my heart would kill me if he learned I had ever been born
.”

“
But I would never
—”

“
But that doesn
’
t erase twenty-three years of fear and horror.
Can
’
t you understand that!
”
Her voice
rose
slightly.
“
I
’
m sorry,
”
she tried agai
n, her voice quieter
.
“
I didn
’
t mean to draw attention to us
.”

Chad wove his way around the perimeter of the room.
He
’
d seen her slowly becoming agitated and it was time for them to go.
They were dancing toward him.
As they neared, he heard Solari pleading for understanding.

“
But your fear is based on a lie.
I
’
m not asking you to move in with us or be alone with us at any time.
I just hoped that you might try to get to know us
—
slowly of course
.”

“
Mr. Solari, excuse me.
I
’
m sorry to interfere
,
but it
’
s
after
ten o
’
clock and we have a drive home still
.”

“
You can
’
t leave yet!
”
he protested hotly.

“
I
’
m afraid we must.
Perhaps you
’
d consider meeting for lunch sometime in Fairbury
.”

“
Willow?
”

“
She
’
s welcome to join us if she chooses,
”
Chad agreed.

Solari dropped his hands to his side and stepped away from Willow.
“
I hope you will join us
.”
To Chad he offered his business card and asked,
“
May I bring my wife?
”

“
I hope you do.
She
’
s a lovely woman
.”

“
Willow gets her features from Lynne
.”

“
I noticed that while I was dancing,
”
Chad agreed
as he slipped
an arm around Willow
’
s waist and
took
a step backward.
“
Thank you for understanding.
”

He
led
her
out of the ballroom, to the cloakroom for her ruana and his
coat
and then outside.
“
I
’
ve never been so glad to get out of a room in my life
.”

“
I
’
m sorry.
I shouldn
’
t have danced.
I just thought
—
”

“
You may have saved some serious ugliness
,
so I should thank you
.”

Midway to Fairbury, Willow finally spoke.
“
Steve Solari knew Ben
.”

“
He said that!
”

“
No.
But when I mentioned that Ben threatened me, he got angry and spoke about him as if he knew him.
I don
’
t think Ben was ever supposed to actually hurt me
.”

“
What do you mean,
‘
spoke as if he knew him.
’“

“
Well,
”
she tried to explain,
“
he looked shocked and angry at the same time, but it wasn
’
t surprised shock. It was more personal. Then he got flustered like he
’
d said or done something he didn
’
t want me to see
.”

Several miles passed before she spoke again.
“
Chad?
”

“
Hmm?
”

“
Do you want me to go to this thing with Mr. Solari?
”

“
Honestly?
No.
I am hoping to see how he responds if you don
’
t show up
,
but I said you could and if you want to, I won
’
t discourage you
.”

“
Good.
‘
Cause I
’
m not going either way
.”

Laughter slowly filled
the cab of the pick
up.
“
What if I really wanted you to go?
”

“
I
’
d feel bad that I had to disappoint you
,
but I
’
m not going
.”

“
And if I insisted?
”
Chad did not intend to do anything of the sort
,
but the rhetorical question was too tempting to ignore.

“
I
’
d remind you that you promised me you
’
d never lead me where I didn
’
t want to go
.”

“
Aww
,
Willow.
I won
’
t either
.”
A thought suddenly occurred that made his heart sink.
He reached across the truck and took her hand.
“
Well, actually, I have to amend that
.”

“
What?
Why?
”
She tried to jerk her hand away, but his held it fast.

“
I won
’
t
lead you where you don’t want to go—n
ot unless you want to go in some path that is terribly wrong and the one I want to lead you in is the one out
.”

She mulled that idea for a few minutes and then asked.
“
What if you think something is right and good for me
,
and I just want to keep something the same as it is?
”