Passion's Hope (The Doms of Passion Lake Book 3) (17 page)

“I have to blow my nose,” she said, handing the towel back to Nik, who waved her off.

“Just use that. It’ll wash.”

Men.
Shaking her head, she held the dish towel to her nose and blew noisily.

“Tears gone?” Jay asked with a grin.

“Sorry. I don’t seem to have much control over them these days.”

“That’s okay.” Jay boosted her up off his lap and gave her a pat on the rump. “Get dressed. We’ll fix something quick for lunch. Do you like chili?”

“If it’s not too hot.”

“Well, we like ours scorching, but I’ll have Miguel send down some mild for you. What to drink?”

“Sweet tea with lots of lemons?”

She looked up at the two men, who were standing there watching her, a mixture of affection and concern on their faces. “Thank you, guys,” she said, tears once again welling in her eyes. “You really are the best.” Before she disgraced herself by breaking down completely, she turned and ran back into the bedroom.

In fifteen minutes she was back, dressed, her hair brushed, and her make-up refreshed.

Three steaming bowls of chili had arrived from the kitchen upstairs, along with a plate full of corn bread squares, so they sat down at the breakfast bar to eat. At Charlie’s place was a large glass of iced tea. The entire rim was covered with lemon wedges, making her laugh. “Well, I did say lots of lemons, didn’t I?” She scooped her spoon through the steaming chili and lifted it to her mouth, blowing on it to cool it off.

“Oh, my God,” she exclaimed around the mouthful of chili. “This is fabulous!”

“We’ll tell Miguel you said so,” Jay said, blowing on a large spoonful of the spicy dish himself before shoveling it into his mouth. “It’s his mother’s recipe.”

“Authentic Mexican chili,” Charlie said, scooping up another spoonful. “Can’t beat that.”

“Charlotte,” Nik said. His voice sounded so serious, her spoon stopped in mid-air as she glanced over at him.

“Uh-oh. Am I in trouble?”

“No, baby girl. I just want to let you know that while you were napping, I talked to Jesse Colter. He’s glad you want to press charges against Bradford for assaulting you at the Club. The prosecutor is preparing the case, but she’ll want to meet with you, possibly next week, to go over your testimony before the trial starts. I also talked to Mike Conover in Richmond. You’ll have to meet with the attorneys and give your deposition. After you do that, the City Attorney will take the case to the Grand Jury. You’ll have to testify there, too. Then Bradford will be arrested, charged, arraigned and either remanded or allowed to post bail, hopefully the former. They’ll let us know dates and times. Are you okay with that, little one?”

“Yes. If I’m going to do it, I’d rather do it soon and get it over with. The sooner I can put this whole thing behind me, the better.” She looked from Nik to Jay and back to Nik. “I want to get over this,” she said. “I want to be me again.”

Nik stood and opened his arms. “Come here, baby girl.”

Without hesitation she slid off her stool and walked into them. He closed them around her, but when she lifted her head, he didn’t try to kiss her. He just stood looking down at her, his eyes raking her face as if he were memorizing her features. “Are you ready to see some of what Passion Lake is famous for?”

“Sure, why not?”

She looked up at him with a smile she hoped would hide the faint discomfort she was beginning to feel from the stool softener she’d taken at breakfast that morning. She was experiencing some mild cramping, but figured she probably had at least an hour or two before she’d need to head to a bathroom. Surely they would be back from their walk by then.

Jay came around the end of the counter, having just finished putting the dishes in the dishwasher, and took her hand. “C’mon, sweet thing.”

Nik took her other hand and they went through the French doors onto the patio and out through the concealed door.

Passion Lake Lodge was an elaborate, sprawling, rustic log building constructed of some of the largest logs Charlie had ever seen. The central core of the building housed the three-story-tall lobby, conference rooms, and the Icebox Bar and Grill. The two-story wings on each side housed the twenty-four guest rooms. Nik’s and Jay’s apartment was an extension at the end of one of the wings. The Lodge’s perch on top of a hill gave it a panoramic view of the lake and the surrounding forest. A wide porch stretched across the front of the building. Adirondack style chairs as well as plenty of rocking chairs, all painted a deep hunter green were scattered in small groups around the area. Hanging baskets filled with ferns and flowers hung above the railings. A young woman wearing black jeans and a hunter green polo shirt with the Passion Lake Lodge logo embroidered on it was watering the plants with a long wand attached to a hose. As she did so, she chatted with the people sitting in the chairs.

The manicured lawn was broken up here and there by islands landscaped with giant boulders, azalea bushes crepe myrtles, clumps of pampas grass, and beds full of colorful flowers. The lawn sloped gently down to the edge of a wooded area composed of both soaring pines and mixed deciduous trees that continued right down to the sparkling waters of a sapphire blue lake.

Charlie could see several boats out on the lake, mostly small fishing boats either anchored or drifting with men and women, mostly men, sitting hunched over and holding fishing rods in the eternal hope of catching tonight’s dinner. Farther out, another, slightly larger boat motored slowly across the tranquil water, leaving a shimmering wake trailing behind it, setting up a series of ripples that gently rocked the other boats.

“It’s beautiful,” Charlie breathed. “Why is it called Passion Lake?”

Jay grinned. “It was the local lovers’ lane during the nineteen thirties and forties. Teenagers would come out here and park and make out.”

She jerked her chin toward the boats. “Does anyone ever catch anything?”

“Quite often,” Nik said. “We keep the lake well-stocked with a variety of fish. And our chefs are always happy to cook your catch for you each night. Have you ever been fishing, baby girl?”

“Never. One of my foster dads took his sons fishing all the time, but I was just a girl, so…” She shrugged. “Never saw the appeal, frankly.” Her lips quirked. “There’s a fine line between an activity called ‘fishing’ and an activity called ‘sitting in a boat and looking stupid’.”

Nik and Jay laughed.

“Not the outdoor type, then,” Jay said.

“’Fraid not. My idea of camping is the nearest Holiday Inn. When I was twelve I wanted to be a paleontologist. Until I realized that dinosaur skeletons are only found in the remotest parts of the world, nowhere near a Holiday Inn. Paleontology sort of lost its appeal after that.” She looked up at Nik curiously. “What did you want to be when
you
were twelve?”

“Alive,” he said simply.

Wincing, Charlie sucked in an audible breath. “Ouch. Rough neighborhood?”

“You might say that.” He smiled down at her. “But that is not a story suitable for your tender ears,
malinkaya.
The day is too beautiful for that. So let us continue our walk.”

She returned his smile. “Okay.”

They wandered along the shoreline for a while, onto a white, sandy beach with a dock for jumping off of and a wooden raft for swimming out to. A bunch of inflatable float toys were piled at the end of the dock and on the raft.

Charlie paused to look around and take it all in. “This is great for kids. Why aren’t there any out here?”

“It’s Senior Retreat Week.” Jay grinned. “All our guests are over sixty.”

“Ah.”

Then she saw the playground. See-saws, monkey bars, slides—the old-fashioned kind of slides, made of metal. Tall and shiny and fast as lightning. Or so it had seemed to ten-year-old Charlie. The kind that got so hot in the summer sun they felt like fire against bare skin. Only these slides were dappled by so much shade, they’d probably never get that hot. Ooh! And swings.

“I love swings.” She clasped her hands to her chest. “Can I—do you mind?” Without waiting for an answer, she kicked off her sandals and ran through the cool sand over to the swings. Turning around to sit on the wooden seat, she grabbed the chains, walked herself back and let go, immediately starting to pump her legs. “I’ve always loved swings,” she said as the men approached. “One of my foster families lived across the street from a park that had a playground just like this. All us kids would go there every day on our way home from school. It’s one of my favorite childhood memories.”

Jay sat down on the swing next to her. He walked it back, then swung forward, pumping hard with his powerful legs and arms. Within two swings his arc was higher than hers. Until Nik stepped behind Charlie and gave her a powerful push on the rump, sending her soaring, legs reaching for the sky, head thrown back, laughing exultantly.

From the swings they went to the monkey bars, followed by the see-saws. Nik offered to push Charlie and Jay on the merry-go-round, but those always made her throw up, so they skipped that particular apparatus and spent the next five or ten minutes sliding down the slides. As they were leaving the playground, Charlie suddenly threw her arms around Nik’s waist and gave him a swift hug. “Thank you,” she murmured, drawing back to look up into his eyes. Why hadn’t she ever noticed how warm and dark they were, like smooth, rich chocolate. “That was so much fun.”

He lifted his hand to brush a stray lock of hair off her face. His expression was filled with tenderness. “Any time I can give you something that puts this much joy on your face, consider it done,
malyutka.
”

CHAPTER EIGHT

“This is such a great playground,” she exclaimed, holding onto Jay’s arm for balance as she bent and brushed the sand off her feet before stepping back into her shoes. They continued down a path that meandered through the woods until they came to one of the rustic cabins the Lodge rented out. A battered old pick-up truck was parked in the driveway. The carport was set up like a shop, with a couple of work benches, tables, and several different kinds of saws. A tall, lanky man was bent over a slab of wood, sanding it by hand, running his hand lovingly over the smooth grain. His unruly thatch of thick, brown hair looked like it hadn’t been combed in a week. His back was to them.

“Is this one of the cabins you rent out?” Charlie asked.

“Normally, yes,” Nik said. “But he’s a permanent resident at the moment. Buddy of ours needing a little peace and quiet. C’mon, we’ll introduce you.”

“No, no,” Charlie balked. “If he’s here for peace and quiet, let’s not disturb him.” She had another reason for not wanting to disturb the man. The cramps in her abdomen were growing worse. She just hoped they made it back to the Lodge before she disgraced herself.

But Nik and Jay had already started up the natural stone walkway toward the side of the house, so she had no choice but to go with them.

As if sensing their movement, the man’s head jerked up. Turning swiftly, he watched their approach warily. Lifting a hand, he pushed up his safety glasses, but made no move to welcome them. In fact, if the scowl on his face was any indication, he was less than thrilled to see them. Every line in his stiffly-held body said, “Go away. Leave me alone.”

When it became apparent that Nik and Jay had no intention of going away, he relaxed somewhat, even managing to summon up a smile. Well, at least his lips were smiling. His eyes, however, remained remote and wary.

“Solo!” Nik exclaimed, stepping up to the man and enveloping him in a huge bear hug before stepping back to let Jay do the same. Nik reached back and pulled Charlie forward. “Charlotte, this is our buddy, Ted Solomon. Ted, this is Charlotte Fielding. She’ll be starting work at the Icebox in a couple of days. Waitressing and singing with the band.”

Ted Solomon held out his hand, his smile noticeably warmer the instant it rested on Charlie. “Nice to meet you Charlotte.”

“Charlie,” she corrected. “Nice to meet you too, Ted.” She looked at Ted Solomon. He was around Jay’s height of six feet four inches, although thinner and not as muscular. He was wearing board shorts, flip-flops, and an unbuttoned red, yellow, and green Hawaiian shirt over a white wife beater T-shirt. His handsome face was gaunt and pale, as if he were suffering from some sort of long-term illness.

“Solo,” he responded. “I’ve been called that for so long even my mother thinks it’s my name. So you’re a singer, huh? That’s great. The guys have been looking for one.”

“What’re you working on?” Jay rubbed his palm over the satin smooth wood Solo had been sanding.

“One of the punishment benches Jesse ordered for Risqué. All hand carved out of teak."

“Have you told him you’re here yet?” Nik asked.

“No. And I don’t intend to.” His eyes narrowed. “Don’t you tell him either.”

Nik bent one arm to grasp the back of his neck. “You have my word. But I still think you should do it. I know he’d want to know.”

Solo just shook his head, lowering his eyes as he turned back to his project. “I don’t want to see them. I got too much shit to deal with before I’m ready to deal with anybody else.” He picked up the sanding block and resumed the rhythmic circular motion that transformed the rough surface to satin smoothness. It was a clear dismissal.

Jay and Nik each clapped him on a shoulder and Charlie said, “Nice meeting you, Solo.” All of which he acknowledged with a grunt and a lift of his hand. As they turned and walked away, Nik called back over his shoulder. “Come to the Icebox Saturday night and hear Charlie sing. Beers are on the house. And don’t forget, you can use our pool any time.”

There was no answer.

As they turned to go, Charlie’s cramps worsened and all of a sudden she knew she wasn’t going to make it back to the Lodge.

At her look of distress, Nik cried, “What is it,
milaya moya
? What’s wrong?”

“I—that pill you gave me at breakfast…I-it’s working.” She grabbed her abdomen, bending forward. “Oh, God, I need a bathroom. Now. Oh!”

Without hesitating, Nik and Jay steered her back toward the cabin.

“Sorry, Solo, we need to use your bathroom. Now. And by now I mean yesterday.”

“You know where it is,” Solo said without looking up. “You ought to. You built the damn place.”

The two men hurried her into the cabin and straight back to the bathroom. When it appeared as if Jay was thinking of going in with her, she put up her hand to block his entry. “Ah, ah, ah. This is strictly a one-person operation.”

He grinned. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“There are just some things a woman doesn’t share. And this is one of them. Out!” She slammed the door, hiked up her skirt and practically fell onto the toilet, just barely making it before her bowels released. Moaning and rocking back and forth, she was grateful that the only pain she felt was from the cramps and not from the tears in her rectum. She sat there until the cramps were finally gone and she was sure nothing else was coming out. She spent a few more minutes washing up, then opened the door.

Nik and Jay were right there waiting for her.

“Everything come out okay?” Jay smirked.

Charlie rolled her eyes. “Great. Juvenile bathroom humor. Just what every girl loves to hear.”

“Are you having any pain,
malinkaya
?”

“No, just the cramping, and that’s over for now.”

Nik just nodded and they ushered her back outside. When they passed the carport Solo was nowhere to be seen. Instead of continuing down the path, Nik and Jay steered Charlie back the way they’d come. “We don’t want you to overdo it,” Jay said. “You’re still recovering. Probably running a low fever right about now.”

“It
will
be nice to sit down,” she admitted. “Sorry to be such a weakling.”

Nik and Jay just laughed. “You are ill,
lapochka.
Not weak. In fact, you are one of the strongest women I’ve ever met.”

“Yeah, right. I let a man beat me up. How is that strong?”

The two men stopped dead. Jay’s finger curled beneath her chin, lifting her gaze to his. “You have got to stop blaming yourself for what happened to you, baby girl.

“I went to his
house
!” she wailed. “I let him—”

“Stop! You did not
let
him do anything!”

“Come,
malyutka.
” Nik’s voice was gentle, but his hand at the small of her back was firm as he guided her down the path again. “We will discuss this later. After you get some rest. Don’t argue,” he finished, when she sucked in a breath as if she were going to speak.

She gave a little laugh. “You’re very observant. How can you know me so well after only one day?”

“I am a Dom. We have to be observant in order to keep our submissives safe.”

“I thought that’s what the safe words were for.”

“Have you ever heard of something called subspace?”

She shook her head.

“It’s when the submissive is so aroused by all of the sensations she’s experiencing, she sort of…floats off in a state of euphoria. At that point she is in no condition to think for herself and is likely to agree to anything her Dom suggests, however dangerous it might be. She is incapable of saying her safe word. Then it’s the Dom’s responsibility to put her well-being above everything else, and he can only do that by closely observing her every reaction. He just has to know what to look for.”

“And how does he know that?”

Nik gave her a sly grin. “Practice, my angel. Practice.”

They started back up the hill toward the Lodge. “That’s how intense the connection is between a Dom and his sub,” Nik continued. “He knows exactly what she’s feeling just by looking at her. And she trusts him enough to know that he knows this and to keep her safe while also giving her immense pleasure.”

He stopped in the middle of the path, taking her arm and turning her toward him, lifting her face to his. He speared his fingers through her hair, curving them around the back of her head, holding her in place as his mouth descended toward hers. His kiss was sweet and tender. And brief. When he lifted his head, he smiled down at her, rubbing his thumb back and forth across her lower lip, spreading their moisture.

“That, little one, is true Dominance/submission. Not what Bradford did to you. The sub trusts her Dom enough to give him her power. The Dom takes the power the sub gives him and uses it to give her extreme pleasure. Submission is always freely given, never forced. Forced submission is abuse.”

Charlie’s eyes watered. “Just keep telling me that. Maybe someday I’ll believe it.”

Jay stepped up beside Nik and turned her into his embrace, pulling her body against his and nuzzling his cheek against her ear. His hard, thick erection pressed into her belly, making her breath hitch as arousal soared. “We’ll help you get through this, baby. Whatever it takes.”

She had no idea how to respond to that. So she said nothing.

“C’mon, baby,” Jay gave her a playful slap on the butt. “Let’s get back to the Lodge.”

* * * *

Charlie just stared blankly at the form Nik handed to her. The D/s BDSM Play Checklist.
Seriously? Are you kidding me with this form?

Obviously he wasn’t kidding, because he also handed one to Jay. They were sitting side by side at the breakfast bar in the kitchen. “If you have any questions, or need something explained,” Nik said, “Just ask. But, really, it’s pretty self-explanatory.”

Charlie glanced at her Page Two, then glanced over at Jay’s Page Two. “How come his is different?” she asked, reading off of Jay’s form, “Arm and leg binders, Beating, Breath Control…” She looked back down at the paper in front of her. “Those aren’t on my list.”

“His is longer than yours because he is more experienced in this lifestyle and will have fewer hard limits. I eliminated all the things from your list that I knew would be hard limits for you. For instance, Being Tied to a Chair. I also eliminated from your list
my
hard limits, or things that I would never ever do to you, such as Breath Control. That is extremely dangerous and is not even on Jay’s list, although other things certainly are. Now, if you see me doing something to Jay that piques your interest or turns you on, we can definitely re-negotiate the list. And we will. Often. Right now, though, it’s just a starting point for me to get to know where you are with regard to this lifestyle. You’ll see quite a few things on the list that Bradford did to you. Just keep in mind that with us the experience would be completely different. He did them to control, humiliate, and hurt you. We would do them to give you exquisite pleasure.”

‘Okay.” She lowered her eyes to Page One of her form. Directions. Mark Yes or No in the first box to indicate if you have ever done the activity. Okay, she could do that pretty quickly. She went rapidly down the form, checking either the Yes box or the No box. Nik was right. There
were
quite a number of things Bradford had forced her to do. That she was definitely going to have to re-evaluate to decide if it was an activity she was willing to try again in a completely different context.

She looked at her options. From NO, meaning absolutely not under any circumstances, or a hard limit, all the way up to five, meaning the activity was a wild turn-on and she wanted it as often as possible.
Okay.
She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders.
Here goes nothing.

The first item was Anal Plugs (Small). Her immediate instinct was to simply write No, but she forced herself to really think about it. Their fingers spreading the healing cream inside her ass had not hurt. In fact, they had been so gentle that if she were totally honest with herself, she’d have to admit that the sensation had actually been…pleasurable. She surprised herself by giving it a Three, indicating that she would like to experience it on a semi-regular basis. The next item, Anal Plugs (Large) merited a Two, meaning she’d be willing to do it to please them, but it held no particular appeal for her.

Anal Sex. Charlie gulped. She knew that they both wanted it. Expected it, even. And that they would do their level best to make it as painless as possible, but… She bit her lip, considering her answer to this question. She didn’t realize she was tapping her pen rapidly on the counter until Nik put a gentle hand over hers to stop the nervous motion and sat down on the stool next to her.

“It won’t hurt, baby girl. The plugs will stretch you and we’d use plenty of lube. And it will give you enormous pleasure, I promise. Especially when we’re taking you together, one in your cunt and one in your ass. That’s called DP or double penetration. Your orgasms will be so intense you’ll wonder how you ever lived without it.”

“Oookay.” She gave it a Zero, meaning she would hate it, but would do it if the Dom really insisted on it.