Paradise Fought: Abel (38 page)

“He didn’t want to sleep with me,” she cried, covering her face with her hands. I bit my lip again. She had to be mistaken. It was obvious that Creed McAllister wanted Lindee Parks desperately. He had to have a reason to deny her.

“How do you know this?” I questioned.

“I threw myself at him and he refused me.”

I bit the inside of my cheek to suppress the giggle. I didn’t believe it. Creed couldn’t ever keep his eyes off Lindee. I didn’t believe he would keep his hands off her, if she offered herself to him. There had to be a mistake.

“I’m so embarrassed,” she sobbed. I pulled my friend back to me and wrapped my arms around her. Poor Lindee; she needed Creed. I wanted to think him an asshole, but I was willing to bet there was a misunderstanding.

“We’re quite a pair,” I laughed humorlessly. Lindee shook her head against my shoulder then pulled back from me.

“Why? What happened with Abel?”

“He refused me, too.” I smiled weakly. “And then I saw him with another woman.”

“No, I don’t believe it,” Lindee breathed. I had to laugh internally as Lindee’s words where my thoughts about her.

“Yep, in the hall, outside the bar. He was leaning into her.” My voice faltered. I didn’t want to cry. I’d already lost a tear or two over Abel on the way up to Lindee’s suite. The image of Abel, leaning over the girl in a suit, reminded me of our first encounter in Thor’s room. That was months ago and I was a fool. The irony of being in Thor’s room wasn’t lost on me. I was in the room of whom I thought I wanted, but the man I needed had been right in front of me. I wasn’t paying enough attention, like Abel had accused me.

“Did you ask him what the hell he was doing?” Lindee commented, her voice growing stronger. “Ask him how he could be with another woman when he loves you?” The anger in her voice hinted at the possibility of this being a past argument between Lindee and Montana.

“I don’t think Abel loves me, Lindee. Or if he did, it is past tense,” I sighed heavily and sank down on the couch behind me. Lindee twisted to sit next to me.

“Do you love him?”

My answer was an immediate, “Yes.”

“You need to confront him. You need to make him see you.”

I found it ironic that my friend was suddenly giving me the advice she should have been taking herself.

“I need to move on, that’s what I need to do. I’ve made a huge mess of things with Abel.” I shook my head. The list of my indiscretions was long.

“If you love him, I wouldn’t give up on him yet. I loved your brother and he loved me in his own way, but I would have given anything for it to be the way Abel loves you. He just fought his brother for you. He won to keep you away from Cain,” her voice rose.

“That wasn’t about me.”

“Yes it was. That fight started because of you. You wanted Thor for your revenge plan. When he was scorned, he went to Atom. It was an opportunity for him, but Abel took the challenge for you–he wanted to keep you safe from them. He was willing to fight his brother for you, Elma. It was stupid, but it was love that made him fight.”

“He’ll never forgive me for getting him into this mess. Thor telling his father about the fight. Him paying for my tuition. His father thinking I owed Cain.” I ticked off the list of guilty actions on my fingers.

“Have you told Abel you’re sorry?”

“Why? There’s too much to say.”

Lindee shook her head at me.

“Apologize, because he’ll forgive you. You need to take the chance, Elma.”

I laughed again. “How do you know?”

“Because Abel might have just fought the fight of his life for you, but he’s a lover at the core. He just needs to listen to you. You need to explain yourself. Take the chance, Elma. Sometimes it’s all we have.”

I stared at my friend. If only she could practice her own advice with Creed. If it was so easy, why hadn’t it worked for her?

After Cain’s words, I returned to my suite. I’d had enough celebration. I expected to find Creed in my rooms, but he was still absent. My coach had her own room, and she’d been missing ever since the end of the fight. Kursch tried to corner her when he came to congratulate me, but she brushed right past him without a word of acknowledgement. “Still feisty,” he muttered before following her exit.

I needed to shower. I wanted to wash the second half of the night off of me: the touching, the grabbing, the stale scent of women on me. I had tugged off my t-shirt and was crossing the room for the en suite bathroom, when a knock on the door redirected my path. I was laughing as I opened it expecting to find Creed on the other side, too drunk to remember he had a key.

“Elma?” I questioned, choking on my laughter. Her eyes were red rimmed eyes and devoid of make-up. She was such a natural beauty and her light blue eyes sparkled up at me filled with hurt.

“Can I just have five minutes, and then I’ll leave you alone?”

I stepped back from the door, allowing her entrance. Closing it softly, I turned to find she’d walked across the living space to the brightly lit window. It was as if we were in a fish tank and the world existed outside of us. The city of Las Vegas spilled out before us. Lights dotted and lined various directions of sin. This was the adult playground, and I knew all too well what some adults liked to play in this city.

“It’s so beautiful and so dangerous,” she began. “Montana, he wanted it all. He thought living near it would bring it to him. He worked hard. Too hard. It cost him his life,” she added, resting her forehead against the glass.

“I blamed Cain. You already know I did. It was easier to blame him than Montana. I had too much faith in him as my brother, as my protector. When he was gone, there was no one there to take care of me. My mother was worthless. She couldn’t take care of herself. I realized slowly that I was becoming her. I didn’t do for myself either. I had to find a way to get it back. Get some of my life back, but you can’t ever go back, Abel, right? You can’t change what’s happened.”

She turned to me. “I’m so sorry, Abel. For everything.” Her blue eyes sparkled in the reflection of light that was floors below us and yet radiated upward like a reversed heaven.

I sighed, “Well, I’m not.”

She continued to stare at me.

“I don’t regret one second of being with you, Elma. But I take it for what it was. It’s the past, too, right?”

She looked away from me then, rolling her forehead against the glass, staring back out of the bowl at the neon lights of an active city.

“I don’t want it to be in the past.”

Elma was a constant conundrum. Just like when she came to me after that fight, the one where I kissed her and I thought she didn’t like it. She had hinted then that she wanted more from me. When we kissed in the stairwell, and I thought she was pushing me away, she leapt for me after a momentary breather. Elma was like the fish that swam up to the surface, then dove down to the bottom. I couldn’t understand her constant change of direction.

“Elma, you confuse me. I can’t reconcile that I’m so pissed off at you one minute, and yet I want to spread you on every surface in this room the next and have my way with you.”

She twisted her body to face mine and began to slowly unbutton that transparent blouse with the dark bra underneath.

“What are you doing?” I choked.

“I want you to spread me on every surface, too. And then, when you’re done being pissed at me, I’d like you to try to love me. Because I love you, Abel. I have for a while, you just wouldn’t let me tell you.”

I stepped toward her and covered her hands that shook with the unbuttoning of the final button.

“Wait? What?”

With my hands over hers, she tugged open her blouse.

“Tell me again,” I whispered harshly. My voice rasped like water over pebbles.

“I love you.”

Keeping my hands over hers, she dragged our collective hands back to her shoulders, under her bra straps and slid the silky material to the sides. I studied her as my hands fell from hers, and she removed the remainder of her bra. I reached out and covered each breast in kind. Elma arched forward and I squeezed tight, rolling the nipples to ripe peaks between my fingers. She squeaked but when I released her she whispered, “Don’t stop. Love me, Abel.”

My mouth crashed over hers and her hands went into my hair. Holding the back of my head, she climbed my body, like she’d done in the past, and I took us down to the floor. We weren’t going to wait for a bed. My hands worked quickly to unbutton her jeans while her hands fumbled to work my zipper. We were a mix of fingers and wrapped legs, until I finally released her mouth.

“What are we doing, Elma?” I questioned out of breath. I sat back to continue the removal of her jeans, tugging her underwear with them. She lay before me bare and sprawled in the middle of the open floor space. Artificial lights reflected into the room. This wasn’t under the heavens full of stars like the first night. I intended to worship her in this light of sin. My hands rubbed upward from her ankles to behind her knees, where I pulled them apart, forcing them to bend. She was open to me in the harsh light of the room, but I didn’t care. Elma was an oasis of paradise in the hellish desert of my life. She might have been a mirage at first, tempting me, but I intended to prove she could quench my thirst.

My mouth dove for her wet center and lapped worshipfully at her entrance. I wanted to remind her who had been the first to taste her like this. I was determined I would also be the last to drink her in. When she was close, I flicked my tongue a final time to hear her purr in release. The cat might have come to play with the fish, but this betta was ready to attack. As she meowed, I slipped into her with measured strength. Her eyes rolled back as I lifted one thigh to open her wider. With a rhythmic dance, I pressed into her. She called my name and thrashed beneath me. I wasn’t convinced she’d come down before the high rose again.

“Tell me again, Elma.”

Her eyes focused on mine.

“I love you, Abel.”

I thrust forward, burying myself inside her and released a fountain of frustration. Each time I thought I’d had the biggest orgasm of my life; Elma would bring me to a larger one. This one was filled with the night’s tension: the surprise of her visit, the anger of her presence too late, and the relief of my brother’s confession. No one had ever had her except for me. She would be the one thing I called mine.

“I love you, Elma,” I grunted, as I pulsed deep inside her. The sudden motion of my release allowed her to clench and explode around me. I held still for a moment. Her thigh raised and wrapped over my hip. My arms balanced the weight of me over her. Our bodies joined as one under the artificial lights of a city filled with debauchery. If Elma was a sin, I’d take my punishment.

I collapsed over her as we breathed heavily. My breath warmed her neck. I noticed again that our hearts raced collectively. A phone buzzed in the background, but I was too spent to move. When it buzzed a second time, Elma said she thought it was hers, probably Lindee.

I rolled off Elma to lay flat on my back, taking in deep breaths like a drowned man released from the torrid sea.

“She’s probably worried about me,” Elma said sheepishly.

I rolled my head to look at Elma, who stared at the array of colors dancing on the ceiling in reflection from the city below.

“Why would she worry?”

“She’d done something stupid earlier tonight, and she didn’t want me to do something similar.”

“Like what?” I shifted slightly to stare at her from a better angle. I was slowly beginning to panic that Elma thought what we’d just done was a mistake.

“Cry,” Elma said, closing her eyes.

“Elma?” I questioned, running a finger down her cheek.

“Too late,” she whispered. “I’ve already done that.”

“Elma?” I puzzled, rising up on an elbow. “You cried. For what?”

“Who was she, Abel?” Elma asked softly.

“Who was who?”

“The girl downstairs,” Elma whispered.

“Elma,” I laughed quietly. “That’s my new assistant. Ruthie Avery.”

“She’s pretty,” Elma spoke, hardly above a whisper.

“She’s fired if you’re jealous,” I laughed a little louder. “You’re the only one for me, Elma, my rúnsearc.”