Out of Darkness (6 page)

That was exactly what she hadn’t wanted to hear. “Seriously. Can you just tell me where he is?”

Denise grabbed her hand, maneuvering them through the crowd. Up ahead, she could see a group of women, Tyler in the middle. He had a small smile on his face, obviously enjoying the attention. Meredith looked down at the loose jeans and huge shirt she wore.

“I look like a fucking soccer mom,” she hissed at Denise. Her voice was thick with unshed tears and embarrassment. How had she let herself go? “I can’t go up there like this. They’ll laugh me out of the room.”

“Then do something about it. I know you have it in you. I’m not telling you to have sex with him tonight, but you have got to stop stringing him along.”

Meredith knew that she was right. He deserved so much more than she was able to give him. “You’re right, but what am I going to wear?”

“Come with me.”

It had taken them forever to get through the crowd and back to the dorm room that Liam used on occasion. Denise stumbled through the door after she’d fought to open it with her key.

“You need to take a break from the booze friend of mine. You won’t be able to be a naughty school girl later on if you can’t keep from puking.”

“That’s good advice, now I’m going to give you some. Wear this out there. Forget your insecurities, inhibitions, and fear for a little while. Take it minute by minute, and I think you’ll be fine. I picked this up for you, hoping that jealously would make you lay claim on that man.”

Denise threw a bag on the bed along with some makeup products and shoes.

“How sexy is it?” Meredith asked, her breath already starting to become more rapid in her chest.

“Just calm down. You aren’t showing anything except your legs and chest. I promise you, it’s not too risqué at all.”

When she was dressed, Meredith turned around in the mirror, checking herself from all sides. She had to admit that Denise had been right. A fairy costume hadn’t been what she was expecting, so she forewent the wings that were supposed to go on her back. While it was sexy, it was also modest. A white corset inlaid in a dress pushed her breasts up, but not indecently so. White tights covered her legs and a white mask over her eyes showed only the eye makeup she wore. The skirt came down right to her knees, and the white heels she wore made her legs look exceptionally long. The contrast of the white clothes she wore against her dark hair that she’d curled and pulled back was striking.

“Wow,” she breathed, getting another glimpse at herself.

“Do you feel comfortable?” Denise asked. “Because if you don’t, I won’t make you do this.” She wanted to make her do it, but she wouldn’t.

Meredith could see the excitement in Denise’s eyes. Her friend wanted her to take back a part of herself. “Ya know what? I do.”

“Then go out there and get your man. Here, take a shot before you go, you might need it.”

Meredith coughed as the vanilla flavored vodka burned on its way down, but it steadied her shaking hands. Before going out the door, she hugged Denise fiercely. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me at all. You’re doin’ this all on your own. I just gave you the tools.”

As she rejoined the party, Meredith noticed that it had gotten a little louder, a little wilder, and a little raunchier. With new determination she made her way through the crowd, not even shrinking away when someone pressed against her that she didn’t know. Out of nowhere, William came up behind her and put an arm out, keeping others away.

“You’re my knight in shining armour tonight,” she grinned.

“Just trying to be of service to my brother,” he winked at her. It was unusual for him to be in such a jovial mood, but she wrote it off as the alcohol he’d probably consumed.

She was on a mission this time. The group of women around Tyler had grown bigger, and one woman stood a little too close for Meredith’s comfort. Squaring her shoulders, she marched right up to them and stood where the women couldn’t help but see her.

He hadn’t been paying attention, talking to Liam who stood off to the side, conveniently ignoring every woman who walked up to him. She cleared her throat loudly, causing him to look at her. When he did, her inner self smiled brightly at the surprise in his eyes. His pupils darkened almost immediately.

“Meredith?” he stammered, giving her a once over.

“Yeah, I thought I’d come out here and give you a break, looks like you have a little bit too much
company
.”

Holy shit, she’s jealous
, he thought. What an interesting turn of events this was. “They aren’t wanted.”

“I know. You’re just too nice to tell them that.”

She saddled up to his side and pushed the girl who had been too close for comfort out of the way. He immediately turned into her, blocking her body from everyone else’s view.

“This is nice,” he indicated the outfit that she wore, running a finger down her cheek and along the side of her body.

She closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his touch.

“It’s sexy,” he told her, bringing his lips close to her ear so that she could hear him over the magnitude of the crowd.

She shivered, bringing her hands up to his biceps to keep herself from swaying on her heels. His voice, so deep and smooth, swept over her.

“It was Denise’s idea.”

He chuckled low in his throat. “Remind me to thank her. Then remind me to thank these women who’ve been on my nerves all night. They obviously made you jealous.”

“I couldn’t help it,” she admitted, glancing up into his eyes.

They stood that way for a long moment, his face tilted towards hers, staring into each other’s eyes. His big hands spanned her waist, and he brought them up to rest on her back.

“I’d like to kiss you,” he warned her.

“I think I would like that,” she answered back, breathless.

The spell broke between them as he glanced around and noticed the group of women glaring at her. “Not here, follow me.”

He grabbed her hand and dragged her along the outskirts of the party, opening a door to the garage where bikes that were being worked on were kept. They were alone, and she could hear her breath echoing off the emptiness of the room.

“Is this okay?” he asked her softly, not knowing how she felt about being alone with him while the atmosphere between them was so sexually charged.

“More than,” she told him and realized it was the truth.

Slowly, he brought his hands up to her cheeks and framed them. His big thumbs stroked the skin there, feeling how hot they were.

“Embarrassed or aroused?” he asked, indicating the blush that had formed there.

“A little bit of both,” she admitted shakily.

“I’m not gonna force you to do something you don’t want to do. So if you want this, you’ve gotta come to me.”

She realized that in his own way he was making her tell him what she wanted, and while a part of her hated it, another part of her rejoiced. Placing her hands on his waist under his cut, she fisted his shirt in them and pulled their bodies closer together. He groaned as she tilted her head opposite his and fused their lips together. His hands remained on her cheeks, not exerting any pressure, letting her control the kiss. She pulled back, then went forward, peppering little kisses on his lips, getting used to the feel of him.

“Thank you,” she whispered, as she leaned into his body, hugging him to her.

“Whatever you need, whatever you want, I’m here,” he promised. “But I need you to let me know what that is.”

She clung to him, tears coming to her eyes, and in an instant, they sprang free.

“Shh,” he comforted, running his hands through her hair. “Let it all out,” he instructed her.

With the tears that flowed, Meredith let go of a dam on the emotions that held her back. It cleansed her body and her mind, allowing her to really feel for the first time since the attack. He held her as she broke down and knew that he’d never be able to let her go.

Chapter Eight

M
eredith breathed heavily as she did her second lap around the Heaven Hill compound. The kiss the night before had opened a flood of emotions within her, and she hadn’t been able to sleep very long once they’d made their way back to Tyler’s dorm room. She’d lain there tossing and turning most of the night, thoughts racing through her head. Usually running helped, but not even the steady pounding of her shoes on the ground cleared her thoughts today. Stopping when she finally had a stitch in her side, she bent over. Panting, she crossed her hands above her head and began slowing walking around.

“You okay?” Denise asked as she walked up beside the other woman.

“Fine,” she panted, although her eyes betrayed her. “You?”

Her friend decided to let the obvious lie go and smiled dreamily. “It was an amazing night once we got home. Have I mentioned how hot Liam is? How much I love him? How we decided to maybe try and have a baby?”

The water that Meredith had just taken a sip of spit forward out of her mouth. “Come again?”

“Yeah,” she beamed. “We talked about it, and we decided that since I’m still young and he wants to, we’re gonna try and have a baby.”

The enthusiasm that she tried to show froze in her throat. This had been her dream, having a husband and a child. Jealously reared its ugly head and Meredith had to hit it with all her might to push it down. “That’s great. I’m so happy for you!”

Denise smiled sadly at her friend. “No you’re not, this is something you want. Isn’t it?”

“I’m in no position to know what I want at this point,” she argued.

“It’s okay to not be thrilled for us, seriously,” Denise soothed.

Meredith leaned against the chain link fence that surrounded the compound and put her face in her hands. “You’re right, I want all of that,” she whispered, tears coming to her eyes.

The hollow feeling that settled in the pit of her stomach made her want to puke. It angered her and frustrated her, but at the same time gave her such a feeling of despair. She tried so hard to keep it together, not to let Denise know how much this affected her, but it was futile. The tears came and she couldn’t stop them. Gut wrenching sobs exploded from her chest, and the complete devastation she felt shattered her.

Not knowing what to do, Denise grabbed her shoulders and pulled her close for a hug. It shocked her when Meredith buried her head in the other woman’s shoulder and hung on for dear life. Maybe this is what she’d been missing. The human contact, the feeling of someone else physically helping her hold herself together.