Our House is Not in Paris (12 page)

Dear Stuart,

Piscine Ambiance started work on your pool this morning. I've just visited them now and the bigger elements are now safely grounded. This afternoon they were going to lay concrete so we looked for water and found the tap in the cellar, on the right hand side of the door. The workman opened the counter to test if there was water … and we could hear water flowing upstairs! Did you leave any tap open in your little house? In any case, do you authorise me to enter the premises and have a look this afternoon because the workman is afraid of inundations. If you didn't leave any taps open, this means, unfortunately, that some water pipes froze in winter! I hope this is not the case!

Best regards to you, Jean-Claude

Once again, as on so many occasions, we simply don't know how we would have managed without Jean-Claude, our man on the ground. He let us know straight away that all was fine:

Everything's correct; no leak or exploded pipe inside your house! I'm so sorry for worrying you before inspection of your abode. I've been duly scolded by my charming wife for risking heart-attacks in Australia! There was only a stench when I entered, so I looked around and saw a dead mouse by the entrance; I expelled the offending body!

Tonight I will take photos to keep you up to date with it all. On the way back home, I talked with the woman owner of your sister-pool — they live across the lane and have also just had a pool put in by Piscine Ambiance. Her husband was admitted to the casualty department at the hospital in Brive as he slipped when coming out the pool: result, a slipped disc in the neck and broken muscles in his back! So, be warned and beware!

Love, JC

By the beginning of May there was great progress, but the only way we still knew what was happening was again from Jean-Claude's regular emails. We found it strange to have never heard from Piscine Ambiance about what was happening, despite the previous fervent declarations from the president. Jean-Claude launched into a series of emails that he titled ‘Swimming Pool Craze'. As for the promised photos, well, once again it was only due to Jean-Claude that we were able to see the developments from the photos he sent us.

The next we heard from him was:

Dear Stuart and Susan,

The concrete part of the pool was finished this morning. They carefully remodelled and levelled the ground so that it will look smooth again! Now they're waiting for the concrete to dry and then they will set up the pumping system and the liner and the concrete slabs on the sides!

There was indeed a leak in the water system but it did not affect your water consumption since it was before the meter! At midday, when I visited your place, they were finishing the repair on the damaged pipe so that you will not have an unwelcome pool in your front court yard! So this proves the workman was right in thinking something was wrong!

I have not taken any photos today, sorry, but the sunny weather continues, (together with a nasty sort of wind that dries up everything) so that I am back at the spade beside my own pool!

Love, JC

At last, progress on the pool started to pick up pace, though all we heard from Piscince Ambiance was a brief email that focused on the international language of money. I noted too that, by now, Nicolas used his full name and included a very impressive title to sign off with.

I sent you this mail because the concrete is in place.

Please send me the 2nd payment for finish the works. Thank you very much.

Best regards, Nicolas Peretti

Responsable Commercial et Technique

Fortunately Jean-Claude elaborated on the progress in his usual lyrical style.

This morning I went to your pool and saw that the fresh concrete takes a nice pale colour so that by mid-May, as scheduled, they will be able to finish off your jewel!

However, in the course of my short morning inspection, I noticed that you have two dead trees that certainly do look pitiful … especially in view of your expectations. When you arrive, with your permission (and kind help), I shall bring my instrument and cut them down to your specifications so that you have logs for your fireplace, in case you bring us winter frost!

There was then very disturbing news that the concrete had been damaged. Without any photos we had no way of knowing the extent of the damage or what needed to be done to rectify it. There was a series of panicked emails on my part to Jean-Claude, still my only reliable source of information. He announced:

So sorry about the mix-up concerning my use of Picasa. The damage is on the end tip of one of the two bigger halves of the pool's bottom. When Françoise is awake, I shall try to use my traditional method of sending photos. DO NOT WORRY; YOUR BARN IS NOT AFFECTED! It is only a small twenty-centimetre piece on a concrete slab of the pool. Am I clear? Wait for the photos before doing anything … I may be alarmist as I am not a concrete specialist. Love JC

Oh how well Jean-Claude knows me to use the bold imperative of capital letters in an attempt to allay my anxiety. It was then I heard from the president, who assured me that I wasn't to be alarmed about the cracks in the concrete. There was possibly a hint — in very polite terms, of course — that it would be absurd to expect concrete to be attractive.

And, surprisingly, it all was fine. Well, more or less. Work, however, seemed to inexplicably stop and we heard nothing further until our return about six weeks later. We expected the pool to be completely finished for our arrival but, as is the way of the world and building works, of course it was not. No, it was an empty concrete shell: no liner, no water, and piles of rubble and rocks surrounding it. In addition, there was a huge trench in the front garden and another mound of rocks from where the water pipe had been hit by one of the trucks. My calls to the company simply bought hearty reassurances but still no sign of action. Once again, I handed over to Jean-Claude to pursue the matter more actively — and in French! Finally,
voilà
, results. I was promised a team of men within days to finish the pool. It was just not quite what I had anticipated: a team of roofers and a team of pool men, all on site at the same time. Still, at least we were finally getting somewhere. Of course, ironically, once the pool was actually finished and it was blazing hot, we couldn't actually use it in the heat of the day as the roofers were on the barn roof, right next to the pool. Indeed, it had been, as Jean-Claude so aptly stated, the ‘Swimming Pool Craze'.

Just like the pool, Jean-Claude assumed a significant role in our buying a car in a matter of only a few weeks before our return. Seriously, without him, the whole undertaking of our
petite maison
could have been fraught with peril. Never did someone appear in our lives for such a short time and yet so quickly assume such a significant role, not to mention place in our hearts. An oft-repeated saying in our household is, ‘What on earth would we do without Jean-Claude?' Not only did he play an imperative role in our
piscine
and car, but he even found us our roofers as well as our new gardener, Albert.

In yet another strange mirroring of events in our lives on each side of the world, we had just bought a car at home and, now, were about to buy one in France. Once again, life could not possibly have been more surreal, nor could anyone make up this extraordinary sequence of parallel events. On the day we came home from work to find the exterior painting work on our house finished, there were two emails from France. One was about the Renault Scenic from Jean-Claude's friends, and the other was about the
piscine
's progress — that is, a request for another cheque, as the concrete had been poured.

We had a few discussions about the convenience of simply buying the Coronels' car because, after all, it was just so very easy. We had actually been dreading the prospect of trekking around the car yards in Brive on our arrival. It meant that we would have to hire a car for the first week to allow us to look for a suitable car to buy. We also dreaded the prospect, as we thought it would be blazing-hot, which would compound our dislike of actually searching for cars. Houses are an altogether different matter for us; we love looking at real estate. Cars, however, are not our passion or forte. It also meant that we would lose a precious week of working on our
petite maison
, not to mention the irony of hiring a car to use while looking for a car to buy. So, really, our discussions were merely a matter of going through the motions regarding whether it was a sound decision or not.

So there was yet another exchange of emails, this time about buying a car on the other side of the world. They started just after our return.

Hello Stuart,

Thank you for your message. We should have made an appointment for you to look properly at the car and try it or on the following day. But we understood that you were not willing to pay the price we were asking, even though it took into account the possible (but not essential) body work repair.

We would like to sell it in the next two or three months so this might also be a problem for you. The mileage is presently 49,500 kilometres. The mechanics are covered by Renault Scenic up to 100,000 kilometres until December 2012.

If you are still interested and have an idea on how to proceed from Australia, we would be pleased to sell it to you.

Christiane and André

Stuart had, in fact, briefly glimpsed their car when he went with Jean-Claude to a concert in nearby Gignac a few nights before we left Cuzance. However, not only was it dark, but he didn't even have a chance to drive it. We also thought that if we bought it there and then, on the verge of leaving, it would simply be sitting in
La Forge
's garage for a whole year. And so it all seemed too hard.

We did not expect that the Coronels wouldn't then sell it in the intervening twelve months before our return. But much to our surprise, the following May, just before flying out in June, we heard from them again:

Bonjour Stuart,

Hope everything is well with you. It has been hot here, everything is drying out. About our car, we are about to buy another one and consequently want to sell the Renault Scenic as soon as possible. The insurance will be running for the next eighteen months. We understood that you are looking for a lower price but before selling it, we wanted to check your interest again.

We suppose it is difficult to make a decision without looking at the car again. The point is, we have to make a quick decision ourselves because the seller (the Peugeot garage in Souillac) has offered to take it back and our answer has to be by the end of the week.

Best wishes, Christiane and André

And so it wasn't that hard after all.

Dear Stuart,

Thank you for your offer. Answers to your questions.

The front tyres were changed at 50,000 kilometres. The rear tyres should be changed within the next 10,000 kilometres. The last service was in October 2010.

Bodywork: in view of the light scratches, we did not consider any repair. About the price, we do not wish to go any lower. In fact, the seller would take it back at this price, but as you were interested, we would not have sold it without telling you first.

As you can't see or drive the car, we understand it's difficult for you to make a decision. So, feel free to say no; we heard there are a lot of second-hand cars on the internet which you could see before purchasing.

Regards,
Christiane and André

Then, of course, Jean-Claude stepped in as the man in the middle. By now it was a mere four weeks before our flight.

I've just had a phone call from the Coronels concerning the car. We shall have dinner soon together. I will probably receive your car and then keep it at Le Vieux Prieuré with the papers and keys, since the Coronels are leaving for Corsica the very day after you arrive. Christiane said I could keep the cheque or you could give it directly to them on their return. No problem for me or for them if there is none for you.

Things do seem to be getting in shape for your return!

Love, Jean-Claude

And indeed, things were most certainly getting in shape for our return. It was more than we could possibly have hoped for.

Then just one more email from Jean-Claude:

I just can't resist impinging upon your precious time once more. Yesterday we went to a concert, followed by an apéritif and Françoise's marvellous tarte aux pommes and I happened to see the Coronels getting out of their car … a very small Renault! I asked them why they had not come in the Scenic and André replied that they did not want to risk any sort of mishap to your car before your arrival. If there is anything wrong with your car, you certainly won't be able to blame them!

Love to you from Jean-Claude

And so, with scarcely any effort whatsoever on our part,
voilà
, we bought a
voiture
by email.

When we say we are ‘renovating' our house in France, we really mean
we are renovating
. We have found that when other people say they are renovating they actually mean they've employed a team of artisans. Unless it is absolutely necessary to get an artisan, we quite literally do all the work ourselves. The roof for
La Forge
is, of course, out of the question, and so a team of skilled roofers embarked on the roof for three solid weeks.

It took some time to establish a rhythm, as we'd had a break for a while from renovating at home. It also took some time to adjust to working together as a team again. Stuart was completely absorbed and focused on
la cuisine
while I relentlessly attacked tenacious weeds and engulfing brambles in the sprawling, vastly overgrown
jardin
.

On just our second day in Cuzance, we were back in full swing. We set off early to Martel to be there for when the bank opened. We didn't have an appointment but we were ushered straight away into the manager's office, where we remained for an hour to sort out the insurance for our newly acquired car. Anne-Marie, the manager, was utterly charming and, while she said her English was
petite
, we thought it was excellent. We soon discovered that we were not the only Australians organising car insurance as there was also a couple in recently from the nearby village of Saint-Sozy. This was reminiscent of last year, when we discovered from Kim, our real estate agent, that there were other Australians who were also buying houses in our
département
. Just like then, we rather liked to think we were special! In fact, we still find it hard to believe that there could have been so many other Australians doing something similar. As yet, though, we hadn't met any — and certainly not heard the familiar accent in the markets or cafés. The truth is, though we knew could easily track down the couple in Saint-Sozy, we had absolutely no desire to. We were very much conscious that this was our ‘other life', so much so that at times we even wondered how to blend both our lives into one when friends and family came to stay.