Our Heart (32 page)

Letting it lie lasted exactly five more minutes, as we were swarmed by everyone walking into the school from the parking lot. News really moves fast in a small town, and in ours it moved with the speed of lightning. A consensus of the events had already been arrived at. In a jealous fit over the kiss in the musical I had threatened Nick. I was preparing to hit him when he swung his back-pack at me. My poorly timed blow connected with his back-pack, loaded down with school books. The books won the battle and my hand was crippled. It really was funny how close to the truth they really were. I did my best to alter the story and let everyone know it was nothing more than just a freak accident. I’m sure most people assumed there was more to it than I let on, but I stuck to my guns on how it happened. I didn’t dwell on the kiss and even when Tami Trapetti tried to stir the pot with her probing questions, I kept my cool and the story straight.

I didn’t fare much better with the guys from the football team either. It seems they were deep into the kiss scenario, and several of them offered to take care of Nick for me. All of them wanted to know when I’d be able to play again. I gave them my best “win one for the team” speech and promised to be ready by the next game and one hundred percent by playoff time. I had to push aside questions all day long, and I was glad when it was time to board the bus and head to Buchanan high school. School had been a chore in more ways than one. The continual questions got old in a hurry, and not being able to use my writing hand made taking notes impossible. There were a couple of times when I bumped it and nearly jumped out of my skin. As the pain shot through my hand, it took everything I had not to yell at the top of my lungs. I did get my share of stares when I banged it on the doorframe on my way into science class. I started doing a hip-hop dance routine, down the hall, to the delight of one and all. It was one of those days that never seem to end. I was glad to get on the bus and turn my mind to football, even if I wasn’t playing.

I really thought that, by being at the game and giving the team my support, they would rise up and play great without me. Instead, it was as if their spirit had been siphoned away. The Wildcats won the toss and ran the opening kickoff back for a touchdown. Two players on our team had him dead to rights and were prepared to tackle him when a third player from our team knocked both of them over. The runner raced freely down the sidelines, breezing into the end zone. It was the first time we’d been behind all year. On our first play from scrimmage, Matt fumbled the handoff to Mike Christenson, and the Wildcats recovered. The defense held, but the Wildcats did make a short field goal. By half time we were behind seventeen to seven. They ran an interception back for a touchdown, late in the second quarter, stopping a long drive, which had started at our own two-yard line.

The half time speech was one to behold. Coach Harmon prodded, pumped, and motivated everyone until the locker room began to vibrate with the noise. We scored the first three times we had the ball and, by the end of the game, we were ahead forty-two to seventeen. Matt started to be more comfortable playing quarterback, and I wondered if I might lose my starting spot next week. I really wanted to get back to the field and play, not wanting too much time to go by and the chance at losing my consistency.

I didn’t go to the Saturday night musical or the Sunday matinee. I didn’t want to create any tension with either Allison or Nick. From what others told me, they barely kissed at the end of the show, and that made me smile. I went to the cast party with Allison on Sunday Night at Nick’s house. I had never considered ever being in a musical, but as I sat there listening to everyone talk, I wished I had at least tried it once. Later in the evening, everyone headed downstairs where Nick had set up a karaoke machine. He hooked it up so it would work with the television and speaker system. Everyone did his or her best to get Allison and me to sing a duet together. At one point, the whole group urged me to sing, chanting my name over and over, but I declined, as best I could, saying tonight was for the people in the musical, and I was just an adoring fan. Several of the guys asked Allison if she would sing with them, and she told each one no. Allison stayed tucked into my side all night long, and we had a great time just being part of the group. We left at midnight, along with most of the others. I thanked Nick for letting me come. We made plans to catch a movie together the next Sunday. Halloween was three days later, and in the past, we always tried to go see the newest, scariest movie showing. I told him that I would get Matt to go along too. His face really lit up and I thought,
Life goes on.

I wasn’t ready to play the following Friday against the Tremont Panthers, either. I could hold the ball and hand off, but I couldn’t grip it tight enough to throw my usual spiral. If I tried to catch the ball
and misjudged it, my sore hand would sting, sending bolts of pain up my arm. The coach thought it would be better to rest me one more week to make sure I was ready to go for the playoffs, rather than risk another injury and losing me for the season. The Panthers were in second place and tied with the Dawgs, each with one loss. If we lost to the Panthers and the Dawgs won their last game, it would be a three-way tie for first. Head-to-head would be of no use to determine the two teams for the playoffs. Total points scored, minus points scored against, would be used to determine the top two teams.

The game ended up being played in a cold, drizzly rain. Many of the fans huddled together under big umbrellas to stay warm and dry. We were ahead at half-time by seven and by fourteen at the end of the third quarter. In the fourth quarter, Matt took a hard hit and had to sit out the next play. Brett Shuler took the snap and was tackled for a loss. On fourth down, the ball sailed over our punter’s head and into the end zone. When the pile was unwound, the referee had scored a touchdown to the Panthers. We got the ball back after the Panthers tried an on-side kick. Matt went back in the game, but was still on the woozy side and couldn’t move the offense. We punted and nearly gave up a touchdown on the return. On third and goal from the four-yard line, Tyler Kinston broke free of his block and tackled the Panther’s running back for a five-yard loss. With less than ten seconds left and no timeouts, the panthers tried a hurry-up pass play on fourth down. It sailed incomplete, over the head of the receiver, and we were conference champions for the first time in fifteen years.

Fans rushed the field, and we celebrated together at mid-field. The best moment of the night came when Coach Harmon gave Matt the game ball and he passed it to me. Not to be outdone, I passed it to Tyler, who passed it to Alex, and so it went until every member of the team caught the ball. When Brandon caught it, he didn’t want to be the last one to hold on to it, so he passed it to Shelly, our equipment manager, who tucked it away in the ball bag. It was a gratifying moment that made the unity of our team even stronger.

I kept my promise to Nick, and the three of us went to the movie on Sunday. For the first time in a while, I began to think maybe our friendship would endure. Nick was a vocal supporter of Matt and me at the games. He had even started dating Melissa, which I was extremely thankful for. I played lights out the first two district games, which we won easily. Our first game at state was a lesson in punishment. The opposing team was larger and more physical than we were. We managed to win the game, on a long field goal, as time was running out. It was a miracle shot if there ever was one. Brad Thoma had only made three of his twelve field goals attempted during the year and none from more than thirty yards away. This one sailed straight and true from forty-five yards, and we won the game nineteen to seventeen.

What goes around comes around and, in the semi-finals, the opposing kicker made a long field goal with only a couple of minutes left. It put them ahead, twenty-four to twenty-one. We quickly moved the ball to their thirty. With time slipping away, their defense rose to the occasion, batting down my pass on fourth down. They won the game and beat East Ridgemont the next week to claim the state title. No one on our team had any regrets, and we basked in the success of our nearly perfect season. I made second team All-state, and Matt was on the first team as a receiver. Between the two of us, we had broken all the current passing and receiving marks at school. I even saw Grandpa Jake stop and take a picture of the record board one day, when he stopped by the school to drop off a book I’d forgotten to take that morning.

The fall turned into winter, and I skipped basketball to spend more time with Allison. I had a few opportunities around the holidays to sing with Justin’s band. Afterwards, I got the singing bug pretty bad. During a performance at Tuckerman’s Dance Club in Cedar Rapids, Jesper Donavan, a former member of a nationally-known band, “Snake Charmers,” approached me. We talked for a couple of hours and he laid out to me his plans to start up his own band. He wanted to do it right and pointed out to me all of the connections he had formed over the years. Jesper wanted to know if I would be interested in being considered as a possible choice to join up with him, if things fell into place. He told me the band would hopefully be put together during the next few months and start rehearsing in California. They would write and perform new, original songs. He had already written several himself. He had connections to other artists and wanted to draw on their talent without the political headaches.

I was awestruck and readily agreed, giving him my address and phone number. He wanted to know if I’d written anything of my own, to which I had to say, “No.”

He looked me over thoughtfully and then said, “Once you’ve written your own song, then the words you sing become your own. It also becomes easier to sing songs that others have written and to make your fans feel like you’re singing to them, rather than at them. When the fans know you’re genuine, they truly start to believe. They hear the sincerity in the song, and you’re raised to a new level of understanding. You need to feed off their belief, as much as they draw their very breath from the energy surrounding you. This is when you become the music and not just a singer or musician playing notes and singing words. I know you have that ability in you; I’ve seen you reach out and touch it here tonight. Once you let the inside person out, there’s no going back. The music becomes the blood that flows through your veins, and everything and everyone around you is touched by the pure magic we call music.”

I didn’t know what to say; his words felt right and rang truthful in my heart and mind. I realized I was only grasping a little of what Jesper had alluded to. Before we could continue our conversation, he was swarmed by several fans, recognizing who he was. The best he could do was wave goodbye and silently mouth, “I’ll call you.” I watched him, as he became the center of attention, and I noticed the posture he took with the fans. He tried to be all they expected of him, and I wondered if he ever got tired of the publicity and attention.

I told Allison all about it when I got home that night after the show. At first, she listened excitedly, but I could tell something else was on her mind. Even though I asked her several times, I couldn’t draw it out of her. For the next couple of weeks, I waited anxiously for a call from Jesper. Grandma would catch me starring at the phone, but when it rang it wasn’t him. I ran all kinds of thoughts around in my head, as I waited to hear from him. I finally decided if the opportunity was really right, it would somehow work out. I couldn’t spend my life waiting for a maybe. Of course, it was Grandma who shared that wisdom with me.

Christmas came and went and I shoved Jesper Donavan and the California dreams to the back of my mind. I never had so much fun at Christmas time. The Dittmers treated me like one of their own. Allison and I kept getting closer and closer, and I couldn’t imagine a better life. We had settled into each other and a feeling of peacefulness would come over me when I was with her. I missed it when we spent time apart and I became antsy, needing her and the feelings she brought out in me. I knew very soon our relationship would need to take a more serious turn, not just in plans for after my graduation in the spring, but in the matters of the heart.

Chapter 17

With the thoughts of Allison and our past put aside, I readied myself to face the unexpected. The feeling that Grandpa had left something important for me to find was stronger than before. Just finding the keys on the back of the pictures justified everything I had been sensing. I took one last look around the kitchen to make sure that I had put everything back in the drawer. I shut the light off and headed for the basement. I could feel the excitement building with every step, as I descended into the realm of mystery below. I flipped on the light, which would light my way to the locked workroom, and turned off the light that illuminated the steps. I made my way around all the clutter and stood expectantly in front of the locked door. This time, I was sure it would open and reveal the secrets it sheltered.

I reached in my pocket and felt for the smaller of the two keys. Sure I had the right one, I withdrew it and held it up to the light just to be positive. I had no doubts it would spring the lock, and I inserted it with ease into the padlock. With a quick twist, the bolt released and I spread the lock open so I could lift it free of the latch hoop. I dug my fingers into the latch and, with a little prying, swung it free from the hoop. The door swung outward on its own, now that the pressure of the latch no longer held it securely in place. I laughed at Grandpa, knowing he never did get around to fixing the doorknob, instead just buying and installing a latch with a padlock to protect his secret. I had to take several deep breaths before I could cross the threshold into the small room beyond. I reached up and plugged in the shop light in the outlet over the workbench. At first, the fluorescent lights hummed and then a milky light danced within the bulbs, making them crackle, until they came to life. The interior of the workshop was painted in a soft white glow of the lights.