Operation: Midnight Guardian (13 page)

How are you going to turn her over to the Department of Corrections now, hotshot?

The question taunted him as he lay in the darkness and listened to her steady breathing. The memory of their lovemaking still resonated through his body, through his heart. Cutter was not a sentimental man, but somehow Mattie
Logan to managed to touch him in a place he guarded well.

“Even in the darkness I can see that you’re troubled.”

He glanced over at her. She’d propped herself up on one elbow. Even though she held the sheet at her breast to cover herself, the sight of her took his breath away. It was going to kill him to take her back.

Leaning back in the pillows, he patted the area next to him and beckoned her to snuggle. “I wish there was another way to do this.”

She curled beside him, like a cat taking a sunbath. Her skin was warm and silky against his. Cutter closed his eyes against the quick swipe of pleasure, the hard tug of lust.

“There is,” she said. “We could go on the offensive.”

“Don’t go there.”

Cutter stared at the ceiling and brooded. He was starting to think she’d fallen asleep when she spoke.

“What happened between you and The Jaguar?”

He didn’t want to talk about it. The memory was a dark place he never ventured. But he knew if he was going to succeed in deterring her, it
was something he was going to have to share. “It’s ugly,” he said.

“I know,” she said simply. “I’ve seen the scars.”

Cutter pondered where to start. So much had happened on that mission.

“I was an operative with the CIA for twelve years,” he began. “I worked deep undercover. First in South America during the drug war. After 9/11, I focused on infiltrating terrorist cells. I was good at it.”

“What happened?”

“A little over two years ago I was sent to Paris to infiltrate a cell. The CIA had created a new identity for me. We knew this cell was planning something big. We knew it was run by a man known only as The Jaguar. I was to report back to the CIA what they were planning.”

“That must have been harrowing work.”

He smiled, but it felt tight on his face. “I was into the adrenaline of it back then. There was no assignment too dangerous. I knew how to handle myself, think fast on my feet. I had that nine-lives thing going.”

“What went wrong?”

“The French government was also working to infiltrate this cell. They sent in a female opera
tive. Her name was Monique. It took months of hard work to get close to this group. Months of isolation. Being surrounded by radicals and murderers. Pretending to be one of them. Knowing Monique was one of the good guys helped get me through it. We became friends.” He grimaced. “We became more than friends.”

“You were lovers?”

He nodded. “It was unprofessional. Reckless. I knew it, but by then I was so burned out I couldn’t stop seeing her. She was the only light in my life. I saw things during those months…” Remembering, he let his voice trail. “This group was brutal. Fanatical. Dangerous as hell. I knew they were planning something big. Once I figured out what that something was, I could get out. But until I had the goods, I had to hold on. Monique helped me do that.” Bitterness rose inside him. “Or so I thought.”

“What happened?”

“By then I was living in North Africa, sleeping in an underground bunker with about twelve other men, all of them terrorists. I’d been inside for about eight months when it happened.” Sweat broke out on his skin and he threw the covers from his chest. “Six armed men stormed the bunker in the wee hours. They woke me up.
The Jaguar was there. One look, and I knew my cover had been blown.”

“That must have been terrifying.”

“I did my best to convince them otherwise. I simply couldn’t figure out how they’d made me. The CIA had been meticulous. I’d been careful.” He blew out a sigh. “Well, I’d been careful in every area except for one.”

“Monique,” Mattie guessed.

Cutter nodded and tried not to feel like a fool. “They took me to an old prison, part of which was underground. The room was windowless. There were restraints. Electricity. Instruments of torture. I knew what was going to happen. The Jaguar was in charge, and I knew he was going to try to make me talk. Either that or kill me trying.”

THE HORROR HE MUST HAVE FELT knowing that he was going to be tortured, probably to death. “Oh Cutter.”

“It never entered my mind that Monique was the one who’d given me up until I saw her there. In that terrible room. At first I thought they had found her out, too. That she would be tortured. Then I realized she was a double agent for The Jaguar—and his lover, as well. The Jaguar has a reputation for being wildly jealous. He knew
I’d slept with Monique. And he took great pleasure in having me at his mercy.”

Mattie couldn’t speak. She hurt for him. Snuggling closer, she set her hand against his chest, where his heart pounded out of control.

“I spent fourteen hours in that room with that son of a bitch.”

Tears burned her eyes. She could feel the sweat slicking his skin. The hammering of his heart. The tremors ripping through his body. To see such a strong man in the throes of a panic attack broke her heart. She wanted to stop the memories from torturing him, but didn’t know how. The best she could do was hold him and hope he could take comfort in her closeness.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” she said.

“I won’t lie to you, Mattie. It was…bad. Those hours were like death. They were worse than death. In the end I prayed for death.” He looked away, gathered himself, then met her gaze. “That’s why I don’t want you anywhere near The Jaguar.”

“Cutter, he needs to be stopped. He’s a maniac—”

“I’ll get him.”

“And let this opportunity slip by?”

His lips tightened, but he said nothing.

“I’m your ace in the hole.” Mattie tapped her finger against her temple. “He wants what I have in my head. The next phase for the EDNA Project. You put me on a hook and he’s going to bite.”

“And take a piece of you.”

“Not if we don’t let him.”

“Two years ago I thought I had a safety net. I thought the agency would look out for me. Well, guess what, Mattie? They didn’t get there in time.”

“I know you can keep me safe.”

“When it comes to The Jaguar, safety is an illusion.”

“You’d rather I go to prison?”

“Until I can find what I need to exonerate you.”

“What if you don’t find it, Cutter?”

“Look, I’m not saying this is going to be easy.”

“I’m not willing to risk spending the rest of my life in jail for something I didn’t do!”

“And I’m not willing to risk turning you over to a monster who will extract the information he needs and then torture you to death!” he said brutally. “He’ll do it, Mattie. Not only because he enjoys it, but because he knows it will be a
way to get back at me for sleeping with Monique.”

He stared at her, his eyes furious and intense. For the first time Mattie realized he was not simply afraid. He was terrified. Not for himself, but for her. Unable to keep herself from it, she reached for him.

“I’m afraid, too, Cutter.”

“Then listen to me. Trust me on this.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

He pulled her against him, held her tight. “Let me keep you safe.”

But when he pulled her closer, the dynamics of the situation changed. Mattie knew the moment was about to spiral out of control. There was too much intensity. Too many emotions. All of it about to explode. Before she could draw away, his mouth found hers. He tasted of desperation and fear. She returned his kiss, letting her own emotions take control.

He made love to her like there was no tomorrow. For Mattie there wasn’t. All they had was this small, precious moment in time. She knew it was fleeting. She reveled in it, clung to it.

Because first chance she got she was going to walk away and stop The Jaguar herself.

Chapter Thirteen

Cutter waited until she was asleep before rising. He shut the bedroom door and went into the living room. With a heavy heart he picked up the phone.

Martin Wolfe answered on the first ring. “Where the hell are you?”

“In a safe place.”

“Do you have Mattie Logan?”

“I’ve got her.”

“Where are you? I’ll have a couple of agents pick her up.”

Cutter hesitated. “Martin, something isn’t right about this case.”

“What are you talking about?” Wolfe asked cautiously.

“I’m talking about Mattie Logan.”

“What about her?”

“I think someone else may be involved.”

“Cutter, you’re making me very uneasy.”

“She didn’t do it.”

Wolfe made a rude sound. “Stop right there.”

“The person who sold the EDNA plans to The Jaguar is still out there.”

“And you know this how?”

Cutter knew what the other man would think. Hating it that he would be partially right. “We were holed up for a couple a days under difficult circumstances. The information she gave me is credible.”

“You believe her.”

“Yes.”

A sigh hissed over the line. “Tell me you did not cross a line with her.”

Now it was Cutter’s turn to remain silent.

“Oh, for God’s sake! You slept with her?”

Another long, uncomfortable silence.

Wolfe cursed. “You were the one operative I figured I could count on to do this right!”

“I brought her in.”

“What you brought in is a potential lawsuit against the agency. For God’s sake, Sean, she could make all sorts of claims against you. It could affect a case that took federal prosecutors months to put together.”

“She won’t.”

Wolfe laughed, but it was a cynical sound.
“The shrink warned me you weren’t ready to go back into the field. I should have listened.”

“She didn’t do it, Martin. I’m going to prove it.”

“Let the judicial system take care of Logan. I want you to concentrate on bringing in The Jaguar. This is the closest we’ve been to him since…”

“Since he nearly tortured me to death,” Cutter finished brutally.

“He needs to be stopped.”

“I’ll get him.”

“You could use Logan to smoke him out.”

“No.”

“That bastard needs her. He’s not going to kill her.”

“I’m not going to put a civilian in that kind of danger.”

“She put herself in danger.”

Cutter scrubbed a hand over his jaw, aware that he hadn’t shaved for two days. “I’ll think of something else,” he said.

“She’s your best bet and you know it,” Wolfe said.

“She’s been through enough.”

Wolfe swore. “Where are you?”

Knowing if he wanted to keep Mattie safe, he didn’t have a choice but to send her back, Cutter closed his eyes, hating what he had to do. “I’m
at the Chateau Maurier in Silver Lake. In Alberta.”

“I can have two U.S. Marshalls there in a couple of hours.”

“What about jurisdiction?”

“You know I can take care of any jurisdiction or extradition problem with one phone call.” Wolfe paused. “Two hours, Sean.”

“I’ll be here,” Cutter said and disconnected.

MATTIE STOOD at the bedroom door and listened as Cutter gave the man on the other end of the phone line their location. She couldn’t believe he was going to turn her over to the authorities after everything they’d been through. Was he doing it because he cared for her and wanted to keep her safe as he claimed? Or had she been a fool and let him use her in the worse possible way a man could use a woman?

The questions hit her like a punch to the stomach. She nearly doubled over with the pain. She didn’t know what to think. Sean Cutter seemed like a straight shooter. But six months ago, so had Daniel Savage. The one thing she did know for certain was that she was not going to prison.

She took a final look at Cutter. He’d hung up
the phone and was sitting on the sofa with his elbows on his knees, his face in his hands. He looked…broken. The need to go to him was great. But Mattie couldn’t let herself. No matter how painful—no matter how dangerous—she had to do this.

Quietly she eased the door shut and backed away from it. Looking around quickly, she gathered the clothes Cutter had bought for her when he’d picked up their dinner. She slipped into the parka and spotted one of two cell phones he’d bought lying on the night table. She snatched it up and dropped it into her pocket. Never taking her eyes from the sliver of light beneath the door, praying he didn’t walk in before she could get out, she crept to the window. The wooden sill creaked when she opened it.

Squeezing her body through the opening, she slid outside into the frigid night air and set off at a run.

CUTTER FELT LIKE HELL. Truth be told, he felt worse than hell. He felt as if he’d betrayed Mattie. That he’d made love to her just minutes before turning her in gave the situation a cruel twist.

After hanging up the phone, he sat on the sofa trying to come up with a way out of this
mess. But all he could think of was Mattie. The way she’d looked at him when he touched her cheek. The heat in her eyes when he kissed her. The way her eyes had glazed in pleasure when he’d been inside her.

Martin Wolfe was right. He’d crossed a line with her. Put a black mark on his career. But the worst thing he’d done was betray a woman he cared for deeply.
Too deeply,
he thought.

The realization that he’d fallen for her frightened him. Cutter was a whiz at dodging bullets, but to be confronted with feelings so overwhelming was something else altogether—and a hell of a lot more terrifying.

Cursing, he rose. He looked at the bedroom door where she lay sleeping just beyond. The need to go to her and spend these last hours with her ate at him like acid. But he knew making love to her again after what he’d done would only make things worse. It would only make their inevitable parting more painful for both of them.

Better for him to get some sleep. He was mentally and physically exhausted. He needed distance from her. From all the things she made him feel. From the emotions boiling inside him.