Authors: Helenkay Dimon
“Why?”
“Because I don't know if I'm what you need either. She thinks I am but my past and my age scare you.”
“Stop.” All the arguments tangled together and got confused. She was viewing this all wrong and he had to make her understand. The adrenaline pumping through him said his happiness depended on it. “Listen to me. I don't give a shit about your past. Not at all. And your age . . .”
“I can't fix that.”
“It isn't about the number. Well, it was at the beginning until I realized how sexy and smart and mature you are.” Now he thought of her as younger and him as the luckiest man in DC. “Your age scares me because I know you should go to school and find a younger guy, one without baggage, who can give you a life without all the crap I drag behind me.”
“Are you kidding?”
He slipped his hands over her arms and pulled her in close. “I should let you go, but call me selfish because I don't think I can.”
Not, “think” at all. He knew.
Her hand went to the knot on his tie and a sexy glint shone in her eyes. “Bast, to be frank, I've had boys. You know you weren't my first. Not that we're talking numbers here because that can't lead to anything good, but you weren't even my second.”
Okay, he'd be fine if they skipped this part. “So?”
“I want a man. You.” She went on tiptoes and pressed a soft kiss on the top of his nose. “You with your emotional bullshit and messed-up family. You with your clingy ex-wife and need to rescue everyone. You who panics when things get emotionally close and shoves me away.”
Man, she knew him cold. “I won't do that again.”
“You will because you're still battling something deep inside. Because you don't think you deserve happiness and to find what you want, but you do.”
His hands went to her lower back and her body slid against his. “Tell me what you want.”
“I want more than now. I want a chance at forever.”
Forever.
Exactly what he wanted. “Let me give you that.”
She pulled her head back and frowned. “You're even willing to try?”
This was it. He could pivot and use his way with words to get out of plunging straight in, but he didn't want that. He had to put it on the line and hope she'd join him.
She'd said she loved him. She took her risk. Now it was his turn.
“I know this is fast and you're unsure, but I want you to move in. For real, not just because it's safer.” His gaze searched hers. “All I can think about is you. When you're not here, I want to go hunt you down and drag you back. It's this strange Neanderthal thing I've never really experienced, but I need you by my side while we work our way through this.”
She bit her lower lips as her finger tightened on his tie. “And when you decide it's time to move on?”
“It's not going to happen.”
She loosened the knot and pulled the tie free from his shirt. “I'm going to start school and that's going to suck because I hate school and am not good at it. Book stuff doesn't come easy to me.”
His brain cells flickered off and a rush of heat pulsed through him. Through it all, he struggled to keep up. She had to know this was about more than sex and he did listen. “Why are you going?”
“Because I managed a store and I know what I really want to do is have the skills to own one.” She smiled. “Jarrett helped me figure out what program made sense for me.”
“Of course he did.”
“He's a good guy.” She unfastened one, then another button on Bast's shirt. “So are you.”
“Then take a chance on me.” He willed her to say yes.
“You're not that big of a risk, except that you might only ever want me for sex.”
“I do want sex, but it's much deeper than that.” He lifted her off her feet and groaned when she wrapped her legs around his upper thighs. “Do you really not know I'm falling for you? Can you not see it? Feel it?”
With his hands under her ass, he pulled her higher up his body. The kiss came next. A mix of hot and sweet. A promise of more to come.
Before she could say anything, he pushed ahead. “Reality is I'm half in love with you already and falling this fast scares the shit out of me.”
She burst out laughing. “So romantic.”
“But I want to risk it all. I was trying to do that tonight.”
Her laughter faded. “What?”
“There.” He turned her around and shuffled over to the clothes bag. “One of your dresses.”
“I have no idea what you're talking about.”
His confidence tripped. It had seemed like a good idea a half hour ago. Now he worried she'd tag him as a stalker or housebreaker. “I'm sure there are guys who can look at a woman and know her size and buy the right thingâ”
“That sounds creepy to me.”
“To me, too, so Wade gave me the key to your place and I went over and picked up a dress.” As soon as the words were out Bast knew he had fumbled that like he had so much else.
Her eyebrow lifted. “Not creepy at all.”
“Point is I wanted you to wear it when we went out on our first official date tomorrow.” He pressed her back against the wall. Balanced her there as his hand traveled over her shirt to cup her breast and smile over the feel of her.
“Out with me in public?”
“You want me, you get all of me.”
She unbuttoned the rest of her shirt and slipped a hand over his chest. “I can handle that.”
“Yeah, well. Wait until you meet my dad.”
“He's going to think I'm too young for you.”
“Actually, he'll think you're too young for me but the perfect age for him.” Bast almost lost his train of thought when her fingers went to his belt. “Dad's an expert on families, having had three of them so far.”
Before he could say anything else, she put a hand against his cheek and forced him to stop talking. “I love you.”
Three words that scared the hell out of him a few weeks ago now set him free. “And I love you.”
“That doesn't sound like a guy who's just falling.”
“Wait until I say it a few weeks from now.” With every day it would grow and take hold. He already hated being away from her. He couldn't imagine how strong those feelings would be in a month, or even a year. And he planned to stick around and find out.
“I can give you the time you need to be ready for us.”
He loved her even more for saying that.
“I don't want time or distance. I want you.” He kissed her, long enough to send a message. Short enough to leave room for so much more. “My one and only.”
“That's an offer that will make me stay.” Her fingers slipped past his waistband and into his briefs. “But you should know that once I dig in, I'm not going to let you go. No divorce, no pushing me away. You get me, only me, forever.”
Marriage. A concept he'd pushed aside and decided would never be for him again. Now he wondered. With her, he might be willing to try again.
“Deal.” His lips went to her neck and he inhaled the warm scent that lingered there.
“So, this dinner is tomorrow and not tonight, right?” She wrapped her fingers around his cock and moved her hand up and down.
“Yes.” It was the only word he could force out.
“Then you know what time it is?”
“I'm hoping you say time for make-up sex.” He got her shirt undone and debated the benefits of carrying her to the bed versus taking her against the wall.
She rubbed her thumb over the tip of his cock. When he treated her to a sharp inhale, she did it a second time. “Once again we're on the same wavelength.”
Against the wall won. “See, we're perfect for each other.”
Her mouth lingered over his. “I'll give you all night to prove it.”
And he did.
Bestselling and award-winning author
HelenKay Dimon
spent twelve years in the most unromantic career everâdivorce lawyer. After dedicating all that time and effort to helping people terminate relationships, she is thrilled to write romance novels full time. Her books have been featured at
E! Online
and in the
Chicago Tribune
, and she has had two of her books named “Red-Hot Reads” in
Cosmopolitan
magazine
.
When not writing, she teaches fiction and romance writing at MiraCosta College and UCSD and generally wastes a lot of time watching bad Syfy channel movies.
HelenKay loves to talk with her readers and can be reached through her website, helenkaydimon.com, or her Facebook page, facebook.com/HelenKayDimon.