Authors: Piper Vaughn
drama?”
I nodded. “But, Dusty, it’s pictures only. I
swear.” I had to get it all out before he walked off.
“I’m a relationship guy. I don’t fuck around. I did
kiss Josh once, but it was before we started dating.
I told him it wasn’t going to go any further even
before I had the possibility of you being in my life.
Now? God, I’d never do anything to ruin us.” I
lowered my head and squeezed my eyes shut. They
were hot, and the pressure had started building.
Jesus, if I cried on top of everything else, my night,
and my life, would just be the biggest joke ever.
I’d had him for a few brief weeks, and it had been
heaven. I hated myself.
Dusty reached out and lifted my chin. “So, it’s
just work, huh?”
I opened my eyes but had to blink away tears.
Jesus. “Y-yeah. Just work. I don’t even like it.
That’s the irony of all this.” I couldn’t take it. I had
to look away.
“Ash, look at me.” It took me a few seconds,
but I did. Dusty’s eyes were big and gorgeous, and
the anger was draining away. For the first time
since I saw him by the pool I started to hope. “I
don’t care about the damn porn photography. I’m
not a nun or a virgin. I’d be a big hypocrite if I got
all conservative on you.”
“Really?” I could almost breathe again.
“Yes, really. It’s fine.” He tightened his grip
on my chin. “I
will
care if you fuck around on me,
but I believe you if you say you’re not.”
I couldn’t take it anymore. I pulled Dusty into
my arms and hugged him as tightly as I could.
“Never. I wouldn’t even want to touch anyone
else. Just you. Always you.”
I love you.
It had taken feeling like I was
going to lose him for the words to solidify in my
mind. I loved him. Real love. Consuming, all
encompassing, never-want-to-look-at-another-guy
kind of love. It wasn’t the time to tell him. Not
when we’d barely survived the night.
“So, do you think I caused enough drama to
get you fired, or is it cool?” He leaned back and
made a rueful face, wiping at my cheeks with his
thumbs.
“I don’t even care. Let’s just go.” As long as I
had Dusty, that damn money meant nothing.
“No. I won’t do that to you. How much is it
anyway?”
“Two grand.” I really didn’t care anymore. I
just wanted to be at that beach cabin, wherever it
was, cuddling with Dusty after a day in the sand. I
wanted to rewind, make a different choice, and be
nowhere near the porn mansion and Dusty’s hurt
eyes. Our relationship would never be untouched
again.
Dusty choked and looked at the ground.
“Okay, I’m really not going to do that to you. Why
don’t we get you back in there and hope… who
hired you?”
“Dom. The director.”
“Let’s hope Dom has a sense of humor.”
“Are you serious? You’d come in there with
me?”
Dusty shrugged. “Sure, why not? A few naked
chicks aren’t going to make my eyes spontaneously
combust. Besides, I’d like to meet this Josh kid.”
“Marking your territory?” I dared to smile a
little.
“Maybe.” Dusty raised his eyebrows. “Let’s
go.”
“Wait, hold on.”
“What?”
“If you weren’t talking about the porn back at
The Banana Leaf, what did you mean?”
“Oh, only that I’d heard you were a total
player, always screwing around with different
guys and girls. I mean, it’s obviously not true.”
I shook my head. “Wonder how many people
think me and Archer are the same person. He is
always with a different guy, and I’m there with
women all the time. As clients. It’s an easy place
to meet and go over my different photo package
options.”
“How come you haven’t been there lately?”
I smiled and rubbed my thumb on his jaw. “I
haven’t had many new clients lately. I’ve been, um,
a bit busy.”
“True.” He grinned slyly.
“Besides, I thought you didn’t like all of this,
so I didn’t want to run into you there and parade it
in front of you. It just seemed easier to avoid the
situation. Turns out I could’ve saved both of us a
headache if I just said something a long time ago.”
Dusty pulled me down for a short kiss. “It’s
okay. Really. Let’s just go out there so I can meet
everyone.”
INTRODUCING Dusty around to my porn friends was
surreally kind of nice. A couple of the girls had
known me through my few failed relationships and
many months of singlehood between. They were so
sweetly enthusiastic about Dusty, gushing at how
adorable he was and how much he made me smile,
that I grinned even harder and pulled him close.
The meeting with Josh wasn’t quite as amazing, but
I had to give Dusty credit for being nice.
“Hey,” Josh said as we walked up. Dusty and
I were holding hands. We had been touching in
some way ever since we walked back into the
party.
“Josh, this is Dusty.”
Josh’s
forehead
crinkled
up.
“Your
boyfriend.”
“Yeah. He’s my boyfriend.”
“You a model?” Josh asked.
Dusty coughed. “Don’t you think I’m a little
short?”
Josh turned red. “That’s not the kind of model
I meant.”
“Oh.” Dusty blushed as well. It was kind of
cute. Well, as cute as the porn-star-meets-
boyfriend scenario could be. “Well, no, not that
either. I’m a stylist.”
“At a real salon?”
Dusty chuckled. “Yep. It’s called Embellish.
Not all that far from Asher’s place, actually.”
“Is that how you two met?”
“Nope, we just ran into each other on the
street,” I said. I looked down at Dusty. “It only
took me about two seconds to realize I wanted to
be with him.”
“Yeah, me too.” Dusty’s voice was hoarse.
Josh looked down at the tiled pool deck.
“That’s really cool. Hey, listen, I have to get to
work. I’ll see you around.”
Dusty left when the actual shooting started. It
would be nearly impossible for me to concentrate
on my job with him around, and he made a little
face at the idea of watching straight porn. We did
say good-bye at the gate with a kiss, and I
promised to give him a call when I got home the
next day. We seemed okay. I really fucking hoped
we were.
I was glad to get out of there at the end of the
weekend. The shoot wasn’t bad. The usual. Pretty
boring, honestly. But I was so
done
with the whole
scene. Even more than I ever had been before. I
wanted a regular job, I wanted to be at home with
Dusty, I wanted to take my two grand and not go
back. Too damn bad most of that was impossible.
At least I still had Dusty at the end of the weekend.
I’m not sure what I would’ve done if he’d ended it.
It helped to deposit that big fat wad of cash in
my savings account. I couldn’t say I’d never be
going back, because I just couldn’t rely on regular
jobs enough to flat out quit, but I wanted to slowly
get out of it, do more weddings, prom pictures, the
stuff that didn’t pay as well but at least got me out
of the porn industry.
I had one of those jobs the next evening. A bat
mitzvah in Brentwood—for less than I usually
made from one portfolio client. It was work,
though. And it was something I could show my
parents, put in a portfolio, and not feel
embarrassed by. So I did it. And when I came
home, tired and grouchy from hours of talking and
clicking pictures of spoiled teenagers and
overprotective parents, Dusty had dinner waiting
for me and a glass of wine. I didn’t expect it, and I
felt like I didn’t deserve it, but damn, it was nice.
I could get used to this.
Chapter Twelve
Dusty
“OKAY, I’m not going to lie. I’m excited.”
I smiled at the sound of Rue’s voice and
glanced over my shoulder at him and Erik, who
were sitting in the back of Asher’s station wagon
with Alice. We were heading to Disneyland, of all
places, and it had actually been Asher’s idea.
When he’d found out that Rue and I had never
been, he’d insisted we check it out for the
experience alone. And so the five of us found
ourselves headed to Anaheim in the middle of the
week on a hazy early-November morning.
It had taken some work to find a day we all
had free, but after a couple weeks of planning,
even
I
had to admit I was looking forward to it.
Alice was a little young still, so no rides for her,
but there were plenty of things for her to see. That
was the sole reason Erik had agreed to go, I was
sure. He looked pale and nervous, though, and his
leg had been bouncing in place for nearly the entire
trip. I think it was only the white-knuckled grip he
had on Rue’s hand that kept the panic at bay.
We would have to wait and see how he did
once we actually got there. I had a feeling he
would pull it together, for Alice if nothing else.
He’d walk on fire for that baby girl. He could
handle Disneyland. I hoped.
“Almost there,” Asher said from behind the
wheel.
I reached over to grab his free hand and
threaded our fingers together. He looked away
from the road long enough to shoot me a smile, and
my belly quivered. God, even two months after
we’d officially decided to be together, my body
still reacted to every small thing he did.
Aside from the near-disaster with the porn
party a couple of weeks back and Archer’s
occasional sniping whenever we ran into him, our
relationship had been perfect so far. I had no
delusions that our honeymoon phase would last
forever, but I thought we were getting to the point
where we’d be solid enough to work our way
through whatever problems might spring up.
Neither of us had mentioned love yet, and that
was fine. I knew how I felt about him, and I was
pretty certain he felt the same way about me. I
didn’t need to hear the words until he was ready.
But that feeling I’d gotten the first time I’d seen
him, and all the times after, that rightness, it hadn’t
gone away. My skin buzzed and hummed whenever
we were close, whenever he touched me, and I
didn’t think there could be anything,
anything
,
better than the feel of him inside me.
Whether it was fate or not, I couldn’t say. But
I thought it might be.
After we’d paid the fee and parked in a lot
across the street from the entrance of the park,
Asher and I were already out of the car before I
realized Erik’s nervousness had apparently gone
from a simmer to a rolling boil. I could see him
shaking his head through the window, and neither
he nor Rue had made any attempt to get out of the
car.
A few moments later, Rue cracked his door
and gestured me over. “Hey, Dust, can you get
Alice out of her car seat and grab her stuff from the
trunk, please? We need a minute, okay?”
I nodded, glancing at Erik long enough to see
that he was trembling a little and visibly stressed. I
gave him my most reassuring smile, then looked at
Asher over my shoulder. “Hon, can you get the
supplies from the back?”
“Sure.”