One Last Lie (20 page)

Wayne strolled to the small, round meeting table in the corner of the room and sat down on one of the chairs. “Actually, that’s why I’m here. I told Marina you guys were going down there and she asked why you’re not staying at our place.” He popped another stick of gum in his mouth. “I told her ‘they never asked.’”

Philip pulled a chair out from the table and sat beside Wayne. “You know us, we don’t like to impose. Besides, I’m leaving you here to clean up the aftermath of tax time. I wouldn’t ask to stay at your place, too.”

Wayne laughed, playing with his gum wrapper. “First of all, you of all people don’t leave an aftermath. You’re so good at what you do, it’s like tax time never happened. Your clients are happy as always, and you’re all caught up. Plus, that’s what friends are for. We’d ask to stay at your place… if you had a place down there.”

“And we’d say yes, of course.” Philip slapped the table. “That’s what friends are for.”

“You’re fucking with me.” Wayne’s smile quickly faded, the wrinkles between his eyebrows deepening. “Speaking of friends, Marina also wanted you, Jonny, and Angela to come over for some tapas and drinks. Well, no drinks for Angela, but, well, you know.”

“I know,” Philip replied, “But why the hell do you look so serious? Shouldn’t an invitation be, well, inviting?”

Wayne leaned back in his chair and gazed out the window behind Philip’s desk. “Sorry, it’s just that we’ve only met Angela once, last year some time. Marina says she wants to get a better feel about Angela. She wants to get to know her better, or some shit like that.” He stood up and walked to the window. “You know women, they’re all about feeling things and understanding people on an emotional level. I personally think Marina’s got a chemical imbalance.”

“Ha,” Philip walked to Wayne and stood beside him. “Funny you should say that.”

“Why? Don’t tell me
you
have one.” Wayne spit his gum into a wrapper and threw it into the wastebasket under Philip’s desk. He then put another slice into his mouth.

“No, I don’t have one. But why does Marina want to get to know her
now
? They met back in August at the barbeque we had. If she wants to be friends with Angela, why wait eight months to have her over?”

Wayne slid his hands into his pants pocket, leaned his shoulder against the window, and faced Philip. “Yeah, well, that’s really my fault. See, Marina wanted to get together sooner, but I said no because I knew she’d only cause trouble.”

Philip gestured with his head for Wayne to continue.

“She said she didn’t get such a good vibe from Angela… said she was nice enough, but something bothered her — something she couldn’t put her finger on. And she wanted to put her finger on it — in order to protect you and Jonathan, of course.”

The scene in Angela’s house pounded his head like a mallet.
What kind of vibe had Marina gotten from Angela? And why did Wayne wait to say something? If they had doubts, why didn’t they say something before the pregnancy?

“By the look on your face, I can see I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m telling you, Philip, Marina’s got a chemical imbalance. I wouldn’t listen to her vibe or anything else for that matter.” He placed his hand on Philip’s shoulder. “Do you hear me?”

Philip nodded, his mind foggy with negative thoughts he’d been trying to squelch for the past week. “What did
you
think of her, Wayne? Did you get the same vibe?”

Wayne looked out the window, his gaze following the headlights of a car circling down the exit ramp of the train station. “You know me, Philip. I’m about as intuitive as a cement slab. She seemed like a nice, extremely hot woman to me. I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary. Like I said, you should ignore Marina’s vibe. I was just letting you know why we haven’t invited you over. I didn’t want Marina pressuring Angela — or you guys either. She can be pushy and sometimes act like a private investigator… not stopping until she gets the information she’s looking for.” He gently poked his index finger into Philip’s chest. “I’ve seen her in action, and it’s not a pretty sight.”

Philip smiled. “It’s okay, Wayne. I totally understand.” He sat down in his desk chair and leaned back. “Men and women are definitely from different planets… especially when they’re pregnant. That’s become apparent to me over the last few months”

“Pregnant or not,” Wayne said, rubbing the back of his neck, “they’re still from a different planet. Is Angela giving you problems?”

Philip paused, afraid if he told the truth his suspicions would become solid matter that would accumulate more negativity until the situation became unmanageable. He had only one choice: turn the negative to positive and just make it work — otherwise, the peaceful life he and Jonathan planned for so long would crumble into pieces.

“No. Everything’s fine,” he told Wayne. “Like I said, she’s a little nutty, but we’re doing okay.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” Wayne walked to the door. “You sure you guys don’t want to stay at our place? It’s empty, just waiting for you.”

Philip smiled and gave a slight wave. “Yes, I’m sure. But thank you for the offer. When we get back, we’ll set up a date for the tapas. Love to Marina.”

Wayne gave Philip a casual salute. “Sounds good. You two have a great time. And do me a favor, relax a little. I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen stress on your face.”

“Yes, sir!” Philip said, straightening out the piles of paper on his desk. “See you when we get back.”

He watched Wayne walk out the door and swirled his chair around to look out the window. Stars dotted the sky which was now black as coal, smothering the lights of the Manhattan skyline far out in the distance.

He picked up the telephone and took a deep breath: Time to tell Angela he and Jonathan were going away for a few days. His pulse raced with each number he pressed on the keypad and he closed his eyes, hoping she wouldn’t answer. His hopes were quashed when he heard her voice and the familiar sound of crunching echoing in his ear.

“Hey, Angie. It’s Philip. Whatcha up to?” He forced himself to sound cheerful.

He heard her swallow, a strange noise from deep down in her throat. “Hey!” she said, taking a few sips of something. “How are you?”

Tightening his grip on the telephone, Philip tried to think of a way to cushion the blow. He felt like a husband afraid to tell his wife he wanted to play golf or go out with the boys for a drink.

He cleared his throat. “I just wanted to make sure everything was okay, that you were feeling good and have everything you need for the next few days.” He waited for her response. Nothing. He heard her move, a sloshing sound as though she were repositioning herself on the sofa.
Don’t give in.
“You still there, Angie?”

“Mmmm, yeah?” She whispered in a way that let him know she was waiting for more.

“Great, so are you set for the next few days?”

“What do you mean, ‘set’, Philip?”

He rolled his eyes, the churning in his stomach starting to roll like boiling syrup.
It’s now or never.
“It’s nothing big. Jonathan and I are going away for a few days. We just want to make sure you don’t need anything before we leave. We’ll be back on Tuesday.”

A few seconds of quiet and Philip could feel a thread of hostility stemming from both ends of the phone and meeting somewhere in the middle. He was done speaking and decided not to say another word; they’d sit in silence until Angela spoke, even if he had to stay in his office all night.

After thirty more seconds of quiet, she moaned and he heard her getting up from the sofa. He pulled his neck forward as though it would help him hear exactly what she was doing.

“Where are you going?” Her voice was monotone.

“Florida,” he cleared his throat again. “Just for a few days. We just wanted to get away, catch up on some rest so we can be there for you in full force over the next few months. Plus it’s tax time here and I’ve been working eighteen hour days. I need to decompress and get some good sleep.”

“Huh,” she said. More silence, then, “I don’t think you want to talk to
me
about not being able to sleep, Philip. I have to try to fall asleep sitting up, surrounded by pillows. I feel like the God damn Elephant Man. I’m basically up the entire night, trying to get comfortable. And the doctor won’t even give me a sleeping pill. So I’m pretty much screwed until the end of June or July or whenever this baby decides he wants out.”

Philip closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. “I know, Angela and I can’t imagine what it must be like. But remember that day we were sitting in the living room discussing these exact things before we got pregnant? We talked about how you’d gain weight, how uncomfortable it would be, how your hormones would go haywire. Remember that?”

“Yes, Philip, I remember. But talking about it and living through it are two different things.”

He sensed the bitterness on the edge of her tone; resentment that although they’d discussed the potential pitfalls of pregnancy, they could never know the harsh reality of a hypothetical conversation that came to fruition.

He looked at his watch: 7:10. He was tired and felt too weak to have this discussion with a logical and constructive outcome. Time to end it before they both said too much.

“I understand, Angela, and for now…”

“You don’t understand, Philip, and that’s the fucking problem! You’re getting on a plane to go lie on the beach and swim in the ocean while I’m stuck in this shithole with no life. You think you and Jonathan need to get away? Did you ever think I’d like to go away for a few days? Did you ever consider I’d like to crunch my toes in the sand and get some sun on my face? When did you become so selfish, Philip? You never used to be so egocentric. Did Jonathan make you like this?”

Philip’s heart was pounding, his hand trembling as he pulled the phone receiver from his ear.
Who the hell was he talking to? What was going on inside her head?

Even when he and Angela had had their disagreement those many years ago, she’d never spoken to him like this; so full of accusation and hostility, as though he’d done this to her on purpose. For a split second he wasn’t certain who was on the other end of the phone — the anger making her voice almost unrecognizable.

His mind shot back to the meeting he and Jonathan had with G many months ago to get her legal take on things. Her words rang in his head, “agreements are great to have… but it’s the
people
who will make the difference between a wonderfully civil partnership and a horrific, unsettling one.” How right she’d been.

“Angela, I honestly have no response to that, and I’m going to end this conversation before one of us says something that might cause damage to our relationship. There’s way too much on the line for disagreements like this. I think we need time to calm ourselves. When we get back, we’ll talk this through. We have to make it work — for all of us.”

Silence again and Philip still refused to speak first.

“Fine, Philip. That’s just fine. You have a nice trip.”

Click. She hung up without giving him the opportunity to smooth things out just a little more.

“Bitch!” Philip grunted under his breath. He slammed down the receiver, more distressed by his furious reaction than her audacious provocations. He’d learned long ago how to make sure people didn’t get under his skin. Through experience, meditation and an innate spiritual sense, he discovered that allowing others to raise his blood pressure would only cause him harm — both physical and mental. He learned early in life how to command his negative emotions. But this conversation with Angela made him forget everything he’d learned.

He jumped when his phone rang and picked up it immediately, hoping she was calling back to apologize.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey back,” Jonathan replied, “How are you?”

“Great,” said Philip. “Everything’s great.”

“You’re full of it. What’s wrong?”

Philip closed his eyes, trying to think of something to say. Jonathan knew him too well. “It’s work… just trying to get out of here. I should be home in about thirty.”

“I’ll be waiting. Martini in hand, as a precursor to our vacation.”

“Nice. I’ll try to make it twenty!”

“Drive careful and I’ll see you in a few.”

Philip gently placed the receiver in its cradle and looked into the dark sky. For now, he wouldn’t tell Jonathan about his argument with Angela. Maybe he could get her back on meds before Jonathan had to deal with her again. The idea of hiding something from Jonathan clawed his gut but this was the best way to handle the situation — for now.

He threw the folders from his desk into his leather bag, looped the strap over his shoulder, and walked to the door to shut the office lights. His mind needed a few moments of calm, just a minute or two in the quiet of the room with the fluorescents off and nothing but the lights of the city and shadow of the sky to fill his view.

As he took in the tranquility, he caught a glimpse of a spark of light, the same flicker of distress he’d seen earlier. Squinting, he leaned forward to discover its source, but the light was too far away. He moved slightly to the left, trying to get a better perspective and noticed it disappeared. Moving back to the right, it quickly reappeared.

“Idiot,” he whispered to himself, realizing it must be a reflection from inside the office behind him. He turned around, but could see nothing on the wall behind him: no illuminated computer buttons, no fire alarm warning light or anything electrical that could produce this kind of reflection. Turning back around, he listed left to right, watching the light appear then disappear with each movement. The hair on the back of his neck began to rise from a strong feeling that started to penetrate his skin; a sensation that the signal of distress was for him. He flew to the door and stumbled into the lighted hallway.