Read One Heart to Give (Heart's Intent Book 1) Online
Authors: Dawn Brower
If what she said was true… He couldn’t wait to have a conversation with Dani. They had a lot to discus. Jessica was right. Dani would have done everything she could to ensure Ren’s happiness, even at the expense of her own.
“Thank you for telling me. It gives me a lot to think about.”
“I hope it helps you. I never meant to hurt either one of you. It was selfish of me, but I as a teenager who didn’t think beyond that day.” She reached to him and placed her hand on his. “Please forgive me.”
“I think it’s time we moved on with our lives. There is much we have to live for.” He stared into her eyes. “You don’t need my forgiveness, but if you want it you have it.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it.”
“Good.” He nodded. “Now all we can do is wait.”
“If you’re not averse to me waiting with you, I can stay and keep you company.”
A part of Ren wanted to say no. He’d longed for solitude to think about all she’d had to confess. But the other part of him didn’t want to be alone. Who would he lean on if he didn’t take her up on her offer? He’d be alone in his office with only his thoughts to see him through the long hours of surgery.
“If you can suffer through my company. I can suffer through yours.” He nodded. “Stay if you want.”
She sat in front of his desk. He leaned his head into the palm of his hands. They sat in silence. Neither having much to say, and so they waited letting the quiet wrap around them. Ren waited for the news that the woman he loved would live, and she waited to be there for him if she didn’t. It wasn’t something talking about would help.
***
Ren’s head lay on his folded arms on top of his desk. Somehow he’d managed to fall asleep. Exhaustion had taken over. He’d needed the rest, but it bothered him that he’d managed to sleep when Dani was in a life or death surgery. He bolted up and found Jessica also asleep in an awkward position. Apparently they’d both needed rest.
He was about to wake her when Preston walked into his office. Ren stared at him, waiting for him to tell him what he wanted to hear. The other man remained silent. A wrenching pain filled his stomach and tightened into a tight knot.
“She isn’t…”
He shook his head. “She’s fine.”
A
whoosh
of relief flooded him as the tense ball of worry inside of him eased. Then he realized there was something Preston wasn’t saying. He seemed so foreboding when he walked in. “What is it?”
Preston frowned. “She made it through the surgery. I’m worried about what happens when she wakes up.”
His heart fluttered, missing a beat at his words. “What happened?”
Preston pushed into the room and yanked his surgical cap of his head. He crunched it between his fingers. “You were right in your assessment. The bullet did lodge near her spine. I removed it and repaired the damage as best I could. We won’t know how extensive it was until she wakes up and we can test her reflexes.”
Ren frowned. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t heard before. This was the normal outcome from a risky surgery. Why was Preston so worried? “I don’t understand. What’s bothering you?”
“You love her.”
“I do.” Ren nodded. “That doesn’t have anything to do with your skills as a surgeon.”
Preston remained quiet. His gaze falling on Jessica’s sleeping form. “I wanted to do more. To show you,” he paused. “I know I damaged our friendship. This is purely selfish of me, but I wanted to prove to you that you could depend on me.”
Ren understood. It all finally made sense to him. Dani was the love of his life. He’d done Jessica a disservice by ignoring that. He’d thought he could make his ex-wife happy, and maybe for a while he had. But it wasn’t enough. Preston really did love her. He couldn’t fault his friend for doing something he failed to do. Could they have handled it better? Yes, but it didn’t negate his part in their downfall. Ren was as responsible as both Jessica and Preston. “You did your job. You saved her. The rest is up to Dani. You don’t owe me anything,” he paused and stared his friend in the eyes. “I do know I can depend on you. You’re the first person I asked for when I knew it couldn’t be me to save her. No one else could have done it. Only you.”
Preston nodded. “She’s in recovery. I know you’re itching to go check on her. Go to your woman, and I’ll see to mine. Even if she doesn’t want me to.”
Ren nodded. Preston was in for a battle to win Jessica. She didn’t seem to want anyone anymore. The little he understood from their conversation told him that. Jessica was ready to move on with her life. If that was with Preston, time would tell.
“We will talk later,” he said and then rushed out of the room.
He had to see for himself if Dani was all right. Preston and Jessica could deal with their problems without his supervision. He had more important things on his mind.
Chapter Seventeen
Dani’s eyes fluttered open. At first, a blurry mess of colors assaulted her vision. She blinked several times to gain her focus. Where am I? She scanned her surroundings. The first thing she came across was Ren’s face, his eyes closed. She lifted her hand and ran her fingers through his golden brown hair. His eyes flew open and met her gaze.
“Hello, sleepy head.” Her throat was raw and she couldn’t manage more than a whisper. “What happened?”
He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Do you remember your meeting with Anderson Nettles?”
A flash filled her mind. The stupid old man shot her. She scooted her hand across her stomach and over the bandages underneath her hospital gown. “Well, it appears like he didn’t manage to kill me as he planned.” Dani laughed lightly. “Rat bastard. I hope he rots in prison.”
“Don’t even joke about that. I don’t think I could handle losing you.” He frowned. “I’ve never been so scared in my life.”
Dani didn’t want to think about her possible death. She was alive. The rest was all minor details. There was one thing she wanted to say. She’d feared she wouldn’t ever get the chance. She’d not pass up the opportunity now that she had it. “I love you.”
His gaze softened. “I love you too.”
“I know. I think I always did. I’m my own worst enemy.” She let her gaze fall. This was the hard part. “I know there are no guarantees in life. I was doing my best to ensure nothing would ever hurt me. By putting walls between us I was trying to avoid pain, and in the end I caused us a million times more. If not for my own hang-ups, things might have gone differently. Can you ever forgive me for my stupidity?”
“Don’t you know by now I’d forgive you anything? You’re my world.” Ren reached up and ran his hand over her hair. “Besides, there’s nothing to forgive. I’m as much at fault as you are. I knew what you were doing and allowed it. I had an interesting conversation with Jessica earlier, and it put it all into perspective for me.”
“Yeah?” Dani raised an eyebrow. Her voice clearing up the more she talked. It was a little rusty, but she managed to force the words out. “What did you talk about?”
“It’s a long story. But the short end of it is we all make mistakes.” He lifted her hand and kissed her palm. “Turns out Jessica had a lot to say about what happened ten years ago. She admitted she lied to you about being pregnant.”
“Wait, what? She actually admitted it? I suspected, but…” Dani remembered when Jessica dropped that bomb on her at prom. “Why would she lie?”
“Because she saw what we didn’t.”
“What was that?” Dani frowned. Jessica had seemed unreasonably jealous all those years ago. Was that what had made her lie? “It had to be major for her to fake a pregnancy.”
“I have loved you since I met you. I may not have realized what it was at first, but it became clear to me not long after. But you insisted I was your best friend, and you didn’t ever want to do anything to ruin that. So I humored you.” Ren stared into her eyes. “I stayed your friend and dated Jessica. It was a stupid mistake I wish, sometimes, I could undo. Jessica claims you loved me as much as I loved you, but we were too blind to see it.”
She’d not have thought Jessica was an insightful individual, and she was partly right. Dani had loved Ren, and always would, but she was well aware of it the entire time. It was her fear that kept her from admitting it. If she’d let it all go they may have been able to skip the hardships they’d endured since. It was beyond time to set it all aside and tell Ren the truth.
“She’s right. I loved you more than I have ever loved anyone. I still do.” She sighed. “It’s why I left when she told me she was expecting your child. I believed it was the best choice I could make for you. Your happiness was all I ever wanted.”
“I’m glad she told me the truth. We should have talked about all of this years ago.”
She nodded. “We can’t go back and change anything. It is what it is. All we can do now is figure out where we go from here.”
“I agree,” he said. “Sometimes we have to burn all our bridges before we see what they are. It’s part of life. It’s who we are. Whether we learn from them and make changes is up to us.”
He made sense. It was similar to the conclusions she’d come to herself. Jessica wasn’t to blame for the choices Dani made and vice versa. She couldn’t hold it against the other woman for trying to hold on to Ren. She might have done the same in her position. It was time to let go of all her preconceived notions and open her eyes to the truth. She’d made mistakes, and no one was to blame for them. Yes, Jessica’s lies drove her away, but the other woman hadn’t made her leave. She could have talked to Ren and figured things out for herself.
“I agree.” She nodded. “While I was lying on my office floor it made me take a hard look at my life.” She stared at Ren resolved with how things needed to be. He was her future and she wouldn’t throw away the love of her life ever again. “I’ve made up my mind. I’m not looking back. From this point on we’re moving forward and making decisions together. No more pushing and running from our fears, or rather I’m not going to. You’ve always run toward me. You had more faith in us than I did.”
“So we’re in agreement. You’re going to stay with me.” He raised an eyebrow. “You know what that means, don’t you?”
“What?” she asked, confused. Had she missed something? Maybe the drugs were still making things a little fuzzy. “I’m not following you.”
“You pretty much agreed to marry me without me asking.”
“That’s not how I heard it. Let her recover before you start forcing wedding plans down my sister’s throat.”
Dani turned her head and met Sullivan’s gaze. “Stay out of it. This doesn’t concern you.”
“I beg to differ.” He shook his head. “You’re a very wealthy woman. You have a family now. No need to rush into the first bloke’s arms you meet.”
“Go away, Sullivan.” She glared. “I don’t need your assistance. I am capable of making up my own mind.”
She focused on Ren. “I would like nothing more than to be your wife. As soon as I’m able to, we can see about a wedding.”
“I hope we’re invited.” A booming male voice filled the room. “I’d like to give my daughter away.
Dani closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn’t want to face them now. Why hadn’t someone warned her they were coming? She turned her gaze to Sullivan and glared at him. If she could have felled him with a look she would have. No doubt he knew they were coming in behind him and failed to mention it.
“You’re getting married,” a female said. “We only found out you were alive a few hours ago, and now you’re leaving us already.”
“Get out,” Dani demanded. “I am not asking anyone’s permission for anything. I don’t know you.”
She turned away from them and focused on Ren. Why were they intruding on her when she had no means of escape? Her breathing became ragged. Tears fell down her cheek.
“Sweetheart,” Ren said. He lifted his hand and wiped the tears away. “Don’t push them away. They are your family. Remember what we just discussed? No more running.”
She closed her eyes and prayed for strength. He was right. Damn it, why did he always have to be? She rolled her head to stare at them. It didn’t surprise her they hadn’t done as she asked. All three of them flanked the other side of her bed. Hell. Why had she wanted a family again? So far, hers had become nothing but a nuisance.
“You’re not getting rid of us that easily.” Her father pronounced. Hell, yeah, he was her father. She couldn’t wrap her head around that fact still. The woman next to him had to be her mother. “You’re our daughter. We don’t abandon family.”
She sighed. “Fine. But now’s not the time to push your will on me. We can make plans and learn about each other at a pace of my choosing.” She lifted her hand and pointed at them. “You do not get to make decisions for me. Ren and I are getting married. Accept it or leave. He’s the best man I know, and I don’t need or want your approval.”
Sullivan chuckled. “If you doubted you were a Brady, that little announcement told us all we needed to know. No one pushes us around.” He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Get well, little sister. It’s going to be fun having you around.”
“Hmmph. Go find someone else to bother.” Big brothers were a pain in the behind. “I don’t need your sage advice.”
“Listen to her. She is wise for her years.” Lana walked in. She winked at Dani. “I need to ask you all to leave. I need to examine her, and Dr. West will be here soon to see how she’s healing.”
“No,” her mother said. “I don’t want to leave her.”
Dani recognized the look on her face. Siobhan Brady was afraid if she left, Dani wouldn’t be there when she got back. “I’m not going anywhere. Come by and see me later. This is all overwhelming.”
Her mother nodded. “All right. I,” she paused. A tear trailed down her cheek. “We never gave up hope. It’s hard to leave you now that we’ve found you again.”
“Come, dear. We can come see Ella later,” Malachi Brady said to his wife.
“Dani.”
He turned toward her and said, “Excuse me?”
“My name is Dani. I don’t remember being your Ella. I couldn’t be now if I tried.”
Malachi Brady opened his mouth to argue with her. He stared down at her and closed his mouth, appearing to rethink it. “You’re right. We will get to know you and who you’ve become. It will be an adjustment for us all.”
Dani smiled. “I look forward to it.”
Her parents nodded at her and left the room.
“You too, Sullivan. I don’t need a babysitter.”
He pouted. “You’re not kicking him out.” Sullivan pointed at Ren.
“I like him. The jury’s still out on you.”
Lana laughed. Dani decided she liked the other woman. The fact she sassed Sullivan on a regular basis endeared the nurse to her. She wanted to get to know them all. It was nice to have a family and friends to lean on. Why she’d ever pushed all the people in her life away, she’d never understand.
“Fine. I will come by and check on you later.” He turned toward Lana. “Don’t kill her while I’m gone.”
“Oh my, what would I do without you threatening me into submission.” She held her hand over her chest and glared at him. “Find someone else to harass.”
Sullivan shook his head and left the room.
Dani was amused. This was the most entertainment she’d had in a long time. If only it didn’t have to happen with her chained to a hospital bed. She sighed, all’s well that ends well, she supposed. Too bad it’d taken a bullet to wake her up and accept the people around her.
“How’s our patient doing?” Preston West asked. “I heard you were awake.”
Dani studied the doctor. He was Ren’s friend, or former friend. She couldn’t keep up with everything. Ren had to trust him on some level if he allowed the other man to treat her. So she’d remain open to him.
“I’m doing fabulous considering,” Dani said. “When can I break out of this joint?”
She was beginning to understand Matt’s reluctance to stay in the hospital. It was stifling her. The urge to leave and go home was great.
“Not today,” was all he said. “Let’s look you over.” He lifted the blanket over her feet. “Can you wiggle your toes for me?”
She didn’t know why he wanted her to, but she’d humor him. Her toes moved on cue. “Good. That’s good.” He wrote something down in her chart and turned to Lana. “Continue with the treatment in her chart.” Preston West was a man of few words. He didn’t say one more than necessary. After he gave Lana those instructions he turned and left the room.
“So did I pass a test or something?” she asked.
“Every one, baby,” Ren said and kissed her cheek. “The rest will be cake.”
Her stomach growled. “Speaking of cake…I wouldn’t mind a slice about now. Who’s a girl have to kill to get food in here.”
Lana laughed. “I will have a tray sent up from the cafeteria. Something light. Sorry, doctor’s orders.”
“Fine.” Dani sighed. “Starve me then.”
Her laugher echoed through the room long after she was gone. Lana had a strange sense of humor. Dani rather liked it. It was nice to laugh and joke. For a brief moment in time, she’d thought she’d never have this. That she’d tossed her chance at happiness aside. Dani promised she’d never make that mistake again. A person’s choices didn’t have to define who they were or who they’d become. A course could be changed and adapted to set a new path. This was her opportunity to forge ahead in a new direction. Her gaze fell on Ren. He was her everything too. There was nothing she wouldn’t do for him. He was the love of her life and her best friend. She couldn’t ask for anything more.
“I promise you all the cake you want at our wedding,” he said. “I’m thinking next week. Your stomach should be able to handle it by then.”
This was what happiness was. Family, friends, and the one person you loved more than life itself. She thanked the heavens for giving her another chance. Never would she take anything for granted again. Every day for the rest of her life she’d make sure those she cared about knew how much she loved them. Starting with the one man she’d given her heart to over a decade ago.
“I will be there with bells on.” Dani laughed.
“As long as you’re there, nothing else matters.” He kissed her lightly. “You’re my best friend, the love of my life, and I couldn’t ask for more.”