One Choice (13 page)

Cahri let her thoughts wander wherever they wanted and soon fell asleep in the chair. She dreamed about being the prince's wife and, instead of receiving his wrath and irritation, she had his love and respect.

When she woke, she peered at the clock and realized over an hour had passed. She twisted to look at the prince, remembering her dream, not imagining he would be awake and watching her. Before he could see how vulnerable the dream made her feel, or how much she already cared for him, she averted her gaze. She took control of her heart, steeled her resolve to do this, sat up, and shifted to look at him.

“Do you need something, my prince?”

Prince Josiah just watched her with those penetrating eyes of his. Even with her guard up, the wall she'd erected around her heart started crumbling under his scrutiny. She lowered her eyes. She wasn't ready for him to see everything, maybe she never would be.

“Why do you look away, now, when earlier you were so bold?”

“Earlier it was about taking care of you to the best of my ability. The care entrusted to me by Anaya and your parents. Now it's about my peace of mind. When you stare at me that way, I feel as if you can see far more than is good for me.”

“Ah, so you
are
afraid of me.” It was a statement, not a question.

“Afraid of you? No,” she said with conviction. She wasn't afraid of him, but of herself, of how wayward her heart had already become. How much he could hurt her without ever knowing caused her fear.

“But you are afraid of something. I can see it without even looking into your eyes. I have become good at seeing what others try to hide. Your hands tremble, and you are watching me without looking at me. Something about me makes you nervous, but you still manage to stand up to me when I give you a hard time.”

“I have been given the responsibility to care for you even when you don't want me to. If it means standing up to your temper tantrums, then so be it.” She stared him in the eye, since the conversation had moved to safer ground. “Anaya warned me you would not be a good patient.” She lifted one corner of her mouth in a half-smile.

“Hmmph. She would.” He grimaced as he tried to shift in the bed.

She moved to his side. “Do you need something? Are you uncomfortable?”

“Leave me.”

“No.”

He stared at her, indignation written all over his face. “Call Waseem. I need his assistance.”

“The only assistance you will get is mine, unless you have to tend to personal matters. And don't you dare lie to me because you are not the only person with the ability to read beyond the obvious. And Waseem will tell me, if I ask. Do you still need me to get him?”

“No.” He grunted and faced away from her.

“Then what do you need?” She clenched her fists to keep from venting her frustration.

“Nothing.”

“You lie and it is unbecoming. I am here to stay until you have recovered, which is going to take a while. I will be doing everything for you except bathing you and taking you to the bathroom, so you may as well get used to it and deal with it. I can be stubborn too, and since right now I control the food and everything else, you best be a bit more cooperative.”
Oh dear.
She'd done it now. When would she learn to control her temper and her tongue?

She expected the prince to rebuke her, but instead he just stared at her as she spoke and then grunted and twisted his gaze away again. Reaching for his hand, she held it with gentleness until he shifted to look at her again. The risk of offending him even more crossed her mind, but she couldn't help herself. She hated seeing him in pain or uncomfortable.

She ignored the sensation running from his hand to her heart. Dropping to her knees beside his bed, she made herself lower than him. “My prince, I wish to make your recovery easier. I am here to serve you, but I need to know your needs before I can fulfill them. Please don't fight me so. Let me help you.” She hoped a different tactic would win his approval and his cooperation.

He glanced at her for a few seconds and then at their hands and then back to her. Heat rushed to her face. She released his hand and dropped her arms to her sides. As she sat back on her heels, she dropped her gaze to the floor. “I'm sorry. I should not have done that. Please forgive me.”

She rose and walked away without looking at him again.

“Cahri?”

“Yes, my prince?” Her voice quivered. She didn't turn back. She'd let herself go too far. Her love for him overruled common sense and broke the separation of her servitude and his royalty. How stupid could she be?

“I'm quite uncomfortable. Could you help me readjust a little, maybe sit up for a time?”

“Yes, my prince.” She helped him adjust. “Would you like a drink, a book? Something else to eat, maybe?” Her voice trembled. This man did things to her, and he didn't have a clue.

“Nothing, just to sit is enough for now.” He paused, and then said with a gentle voice, “Cahri, look at me.”

She shook her head.

“Look at me.” His tone allowed for no argument.

Daring to lift her gaze to his, she stared straight into his eyes. She wanted to harden her heart, but the tenderness and caring she saw were more than she could handle. She closed her eyes.

“Excuse me, please.” She walked out the door, closing it with a soft click. She leaned back against it, and tried to calm herself.
Inhale. Exhale.

Just then Anaya came from one of the other rooms. “What's wrong, Cahri?”

“I'm not sure I can do this. I thought I could, but it's more difficult than I thought being in the room with him all the time… touching him, caring for his needs. I've never been good at hiding my feelings. I've never felt this way towards anyone before and…” She stopped. “Did you hear that?” A moan came from the prince's room.

She opened the door and rushed in. Anaya followed.

“I figured it would work.” Pride at his accomplishment showed in his eyes. She glared at him then spun around and left the room, slamming the door. She trudged to the end of the hall and peered out the window. Why would he scare her?

“Giving you a hard time, already, is he?” the king asked.

“Your Highness.” Cahri bowed her head and sighed. “I'm sorry, I've let you down. I will make arrangements to leave.” It troubled her she couldn't even last a few hours.

“No need for such drastic measures. My son will see his tactics were wrong. I'm sure his sister is tearing into him about his disregard for your feelings.”

Cahri stiffened, wondering how the king could know what Anaya was doing.

“It is hard to serve him and risk his rejection when you love him. Yes?”

She glanced at him over her shoulder and then returned her gaze to the window. She didn't answer for a few minutes. How could he have known? Anaya. She had to have told him. The betrayal sliced through her heart.

“Anaya told you?”

“No, Anaya would never break your confidence. I am a perceptive man, Cahri. My wife is astute as well. We talked of you and agreed together you were the right one to care for Josiah because you love him.”

Cahri started to protest, but he continued before she could.

“There were several other offers of service, but having watched how you reacted at the banquet and then seeing you again this morning, we knew you were the right one. The others wanted the prestige of being the prince's sole caregiver, and hoped to become his wife. Your love for him is why we chose you because you were willing to serve him without the promise of more.” He hesitated as if he wasn't sure whether to go on. ”We have been watching you for some time.”

“Watching me?” She quirked her head sideways. How could they watch her without her seeing them?

“There are security cameras throughout the palace. We have been watching all of you since your arrival. Did you not notice when one of the women would disappear without a word? Several were caught in places they shouldn't have been, though some we let return because they seemed to be lost in earnest. Others were caught in compromising situations.” The king stared past her out the window, seemingly distracted by a car horn in the distance.

“I have watched you, more so than the others, as you wandered the halls, enjoyed the garden, and gazed at the portraits in the gallery. Matthias reported your restlessness the night of Josiah's accident.” He faced her once more. “Why were you so unsettled last night?”

“A bad dream.”

He did not comment on her simple response for some minutes. Sweat beaded on her forehead in the uncomfortable silence.

“About?”

Cahri hesitated. Would he think her weird if she told him the truth? “The prince.”

“It disturbed your sleep when you dreamed about my son?”

She bit her lip and glanced at him. His eyes bore holes into her. “No, sir. I mean, yes, sir.” She inhaled. “It wasn't disturbing because it was about the prince but because of what happened to him in my dream.”

The king raised an eyebrow. So like the prince. She twisted away hoping to end the track of his questions.

He obliged her by going back to the original point of his conversation.

“We have also been watching you in your care of Josiah in the past couple of hours. Before you get the wrong idea, it was not for lack of trust in you, but because we wanted to see how you would react to Josiah's temper and sullenness. And how he would act with you. He is good about keeping it under control, but when he is ill or injured, he tends to have a harder time, as do we all. So far his temper hasn't shown itself to its fullest yet, but I think it's because you have a control over him he hasn't allowed anyone else to have, ever, not even his mother and me.”

Cahri brow furrowed. “What do you wish of me, Your Highness?”

The king chuckled. “You still do not understand, do you?”

She swiveled and studied him and then lowered her eyes. “I'm sorry, my king, but no, I don't understand.”

“Look at me, Cahri.”

She raised her eyes to meet his.

“You are so innocent and refreshing. The Bridal March wasn't just canceled because of Josiah's injury, although it did give us a good excuse. You have been chosen to be Josiah's wife.”

“I… what?” She took a step backward and bumped into the wall.

He chuckled again. “Does this surprise you?”

“Yes. I… I…” She stopped and took a deep breath. “I thought to be here until he recovered and the Bridal March could be resumed or restarted. I assumed when he was well he would make his choice, and I would leave. I knew I could not be here and…” She spun back to the window. She didn't wish to bear her soul in its entirety.

“You couldn't be here and see him take a wife that wasn't you.” He stated for her.

She nodded.

“That is why you are perfect for him. You are willing to give him up if it would make him happy.” He tugged on her elbow until she faced him again. His fingers touched her cheek. “We think you will make him happy.”

“But… but… what does he think?” She stood still, unable to quiet her troubled soul. She loved Josiah, but did not want him to be stuck in a marriage not of his own choosing, which would be worse than loving him from afar.

“You were already his choice, Cahri. I made him wait and test and consider everyone else. You have been his choice since he gave you his handkerchief the first week. I saw it then. He informed me some time ago and then again after the banquet. Still, I made him wait.”

She remembered the first inspection when the prince had given her his handkerchief. The day she'd started falling in love with him. No, that had been at the grocery store before she'd known who he was. Heat crept into her face. She remembered the dance when he'd almost kissed her — the day she'd acknowledged her feelings. These memories convinced her of the truth of the king's words.

She glanced at him. Be bold or be quiet? A deep breath. Bold. “When will I become his wife?”

“Tonight.”

She stared at him outright, eyes wide for a full minute. She lowered her head, “As you wish, Your Highness.” Her voice came out softer than a whisper.

Another low chuckle sounded from the king. “Do you doubt my wisdom?”

“No, Your Highness. Please forgive me. I meant no disrespect.” She curtsied and kept her eyes glued to the floor, ashamed of her of doubt.

He touched her sleeve and then lifted her chin so she had to look at him. “You are forgiven. Do not doubt you are what Josiah needs and wants. God has brought you to us, and we are grateful. Trust Him, again,
benim kýzým,
my daughter. He loves you. Now go see to my willful son. He needs you now more than ever.”

“Yes, Your Highness.” She started back to the prince's room as thoughts tumbled around in her head. Most of them confused her.

“Two more things, Cahri.”

“Yes, my king?” She stopped and twisted around with her eyes lowered.

“Make it three. One, when we are in our private quarters, you may call me
Baba
, as my children do, for you will soon be my daughter. Two, again, when we are in our private quarters, you do not have to keep your eyes lowered. Out in public you will address me as Your Highness or my King and never look Josiah or myself in the eyes, unless we request it. Are those two things clear to you?”

“Yes, Your… um… Baba? And the third?”

“Excellent. The third… you will wed my son before the evening meal. It is not good for you to be in the room with him alone, unwed, considering your affection for one another. We will have a formal wedding once he has recovered.” He glanced at his watch. “I'd say you have a little over two hours before you become Princess Cahri of Belikara.”

“But… but…” Her face heated until it felt on fire. She wasn't prepared to be a wife. She knew how to cook and clean, but those things weren't required of her here. Here she would be princess. She'd been learning how to act royal in public, but to be a wife… terror filled her. A terror she could not express.